Saturday Night Fever…er, Links

WE KNEW IT!!!!!!11!1eleventy!
ROADZ?

 

Saturday Night Links, eh? You get what you pay for….and and I might have had a couple of beverages before assembling these;

Tax avoidance? The Devil you say!

I would laugh, but in a week I could be shoveling snow,

So….any of you been in Alaska lately? Asking for a friend.

We need the State to keep us safe!

This link is literally Hitler.

OK, that is enough for now, you reprobates.

Comments

533 responses to “Saturday Night Fever…er, Links”

    1. Did ya wade into the comments on that article? It is interesting. I think the next four years are going to really reveal the size, strength and organization of the bureaucracy that runs politics in this country. I am interested in seeing at what point someone(s) is able to decide they would rather not be seen and can they hide it.

  1. The Fusionist

    That Downfall parody was pretty good.

    1. Akira

      As an aside, has anyone ever watched that movie? I thought it was pretty good.

      1. dbleagle

        It was outstanding in my opinion. Also interesting on Youtube is an interview with Bruno Ganz (movie Hitler) where he thinks it is odd but humorous the parodies made from his best known role.

  2. Get about as oiled as a diesel train
    Gonna set this dance alight

    1. Mike Schmidt

      I had to google that. Apparently at that point in the song I would just move my lips and mumble in tune while “singing” along.

      1. Mike Schmidt

        Also, at the risk of being mocked mercilessly, Nickelback did a pretty decent cover of that song.

        No, seriously.

  3. Slammer

    Boogity Boogity Boogity Let’s go racing, boys!

  4. Old Man With Candy

    So, what’s everyone drinking tonight? SP and I are about to pop a bottle of Bottex Bugey Cerdon (sparkling Poulsard/Gamay blend), followed by an Edmunds St. John Syrah.

    1. Swiss Servator

      Sirrah, I approve of the syrah.

      I will be finishing my cheap shiraz, then bourbon.

    2. DEG

      “Medicine”. Black tea, honey, lemon, and whiskey.

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        Fuck this flu.

        I just got over it 2 days ago, and now it’s the evening of my 12th wedding anniversary and my wife is bedridden with the flu she caught from me.

        1. Slammer

          That sucks. Congrats anyway!

          1. Heroic Mulatto
          2. Swiss Servator

            You continue to surprise and delight me, HM…

          3. Heroic Mulatto

            That is pretty much what my wife does to the house. She can break things just by looking at them.

        2. DenverJ

          I don’t think I’ve had the flue in, literally, decades. I’ll bet it’s been 30 yrs.

          1. DOOMco

            Hey!

          2. DenverJ

            Hey yourself. That the Willy’s?

          3. Sounds like somebody hasn’t been getting his flu shot

        3. DEG

          Sorry. I hope your wife gets over it quickly. Congratulations on your 12th anniversary!

          1. Heroic Mulatto

            Thanks, man!

        4. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

          Sounds like ya need to be drinking some hyppocris.

      2. Nephilium

        I’m with you… I’ve been fighting off a cold for almost a week now. So I’ve been working on testing new hot toddy recipes at night. My current favorite is:

        1/2 oz Benedictine
        1 1/2 oz Whiskey
        Dash of cinnamon
        Dash of ginger
        Dash of clove
        1 tbsp honey
        Top with hot water (not boiling)

        1. Mike Schmidt

          What’s Benedictine? I tried to google it but just got a bunch of Catholic stuff.

          Sounds good though. Ever tried it with butter? I personally have never had a Hot Toddy, but I have heard of people putting in a little pat of butter.

          1. Nephilium

            Benedictine: It’s a spiced herbal liquor made by monks.

            I’m a fan of classic style cocktails, and last year I picked up a book called Apothecary Cocktails, which had a recipe called Cold Cure #1001 (which rarely enough is a drink both the girlfriend and I enjoy):

            12 oz pot of peppermint tea
            5-6 oz Benedictine
            3-4 oz sweet Vermouth
            10 drops Jamaican bitters

            Start by preheating 2 mugs with boiling water. Discard the water after a few seconds, add the Benedictine and the vermouth to the pot of tea. Mix gently, and wait a few minutes. Add the bitters, pour into the two mugs, and serve immediately.

            As for butter, I have yet to go down that route. I’ve got several recipes to make more savory cocktails as well (including the classic Hot Buttered Rum), if we actually get winter at some point this year, I may give it a try.

          2. Mike Schmidt

            Sounds good. Thanks for the link (you too Brett). Classic cocktails are something I’ve always wanted to get in to, but I’m such a beer guy that I usually say “fuck it” and pop a top.

            One of these days I’ll get some class.

          3. Nephilium

            Classic cocktails are great, with the caveat that you’ll either need to make them at home or pay a premium at any bar that will make them well. Due to that, when I’m out, I’m generally a beer guy as well. It helps that there’s two world class breweries less then 10 miles from my house.

            And fear not, I still have no class.

          4. Brett L

            Benedictine gives it the medicinal taste.

          5. Just go with Bactine

          6. It’s almost as if you’re asking Eddie to show up with the Benedictine comment.

        2. dbleagle

          A co-worker treated me to a can of beer from New Caledonia that was one of the best I have had from a can. It is named Manta Intense and is 5.8% alcohol. Now I have to hope he returns to New Caledonia.

    3. Banjos

      I’m 5 days into a 20 carb or less diet. I’ll keep it up for another two weeks or so before raising it to 50. No booze for me. Plus, I have three honey badgers who don’t care if I’m hungover.

      1. I’ll have a beer for you. In Waco.

        Ugh, Waco.

        1. Don’t have sex standing up while in Waco.

          1. Banjos

            He better not be having any sex in any position while there unless I drive up to visit.

          2. Swiss Servator

            *chokes on shiraz while frantically laughing*

          3. It was a baptists joke, not a sex joke honey.

          4. Brett L

            Unless you run into Jo from Fixer Upper, amirite?

          5. Mike Schmidt

            Wow. WOULD

          6. Unless you run into Jo from Fixer Upper, amirite?

            Only with a shovel. And a tape measure.

          7. Brett L

            They still call that dancing?

          8. Much apologies.
            Yes a bad Baylor University joke.

            … it might lead to dancing.

        2. robc

          Rejoining the brancg D?

          1. robc

            Branch even.

      2. Hyperion

        Atkins? 20 carbs is really low, you’ll go into ketosis, but I assume you already know that. Even 50 is really low, but 100, you can do that long term and probably get a lot of benefits. Americans eats far too many carbs.

        1. But she saw what going Leto did for me. I lost 20 lbs in under two months and have kept it off over the following three months going back up to around 100-150 carbs a day.

          1. Banjos

            Hey! I lost 10 lbs too during that time *muffles* I just gained half of it back during the holidays.

          2. Hyperion

            At 100-150 long term, you’ll not only keep an ideal weight, but you’ll feel a lot better and help avoid diabetes and other typical American diet afflictions. I’ve been on and off LCHF type diet for a long time, like 2 decades. I always feel much better on. Wish I could stay on it all the time. Needz moar will power!

          3. robc

            150 is perfect for me, with a 45 walk each day.

            Need to do that again.

          4. F. Stupidity Jr.

            45 *minute* walk, I presume? Or is this some sort of stagger-round-the-track, Billy Dee style?

      3. Slammer

        I’m on my seventh week of no pasta, no rice, no bread and no potatoes.
        I feel great. I eat a shit ton of tofu, I love it. I can’t imagine it would be easy without tofu, so I guess I’m lucky.
        I feel fantastic

        1. Tacit Rainbow

          Is “tofu” a euphemism for pure grain alcohol?

          1. Swiss Servator

            I would do that diet!

          2. Brett L

            The problem is you won’t take a solid shit the whole time.

          3. Playa Manhattan

            Problem?

          4. Problem?

            Yes, it certainly can be.

            If one has haemorrhoids already present, then stools that are too loose is just as bad as shitting a brick, sometimes worse, since one of the body’s most basic funtions is to retain and conserve fluid loss.

            Affects women more than men, d/t factory original women’s anatomy and physiology, especially during pregnancy.

          5. Playa Manhattan

            The cure sounds worse than the disease.

          6. The cure sounds worse than the disease.

            Of the surgical interventions, sphincteroplasty is the most common (and I do these. Usually a 20 to 40 minute surgery depending on presentation and poss. complications). Even if you have regular stool, if you have this problem, you’ll still shit your pants. Those are the people who come see me.

            Patients really appreciated not having to worry about wearing shitty adult diapers and CNS depressants, and other anti-diarrheals and stuff to bulk up stools.

    4. DOOMco

      More stone IPA. maybe rum soon.

      1. Swiss Servator

        Rum?

        *lights jesse signal*

        1. DOOMco

          It’s just so good.

        2. jesse.in.mb

          Have I been summoned?

          I was day drinking at a brewery and just want to take a nap now.

          1. Swiss Servator

            But…but… Rum!

          2. Swiss Servator

            What brewery?

    5. Hyperion

      Beer.

        1. Playa Manhattan

          I’m sad you didn’t go here:
          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9APdDdpe-eE

    6. Mike Schmidt

      Getting ready to pour a second glass of Makers Mark, with a beer back.

    7. Brett L

      Some Spanish red that was cheap at Costco. Very effective for the price

      1. Swiss Servator

        ????

    8. SP

      Because if right before a database re-write and server migration isn’t the time for two cocktails and two bottles of wine, I don’t know what is.

      1. Brett L

        Right after you start getting calls about it not working?

      2. Swiss Servator

        *Tebows toward SP*

        Y’all… This place would not be here without SP. Or it would be some Blogspot thing.

      3. robc

        At a previous job, we had a no sys admining after 2 am or 2 beers.

        1. Brett L

          2 beers? Pshaw. The Balmsr curve indicates a higher tolerance for optimal performance.

      4. Pan Zagloba

        Sounds right for before.

        Hard liquor is for during.

      5. Zero Sum Game

        Fireball *whisky.

        *blame Canada.

    9. SQWRLZ

      Kroger’s finest, top shelf and all: Woodbridge Pino Noir.

      1. SQWRLZ

        I mean, the bottle was located on the top shelf, not denoting quality.

      2. Swiss Servator

        Miles Raymond: [while tasting wine] It tastes like the back of a fucking L.A. school bus. Now they probably didn’t de-stem, hoping for some semblance of concentration, crushed it up with leaves and mice, and then wound up with this rancid tar and turpentine bullshit. Fuckin’ Raid.
        Jack: Tastes pretty good to me.

        1. GSL in E

          Quaffable. But far from transcendent.

      3. Check your privilege. Some of us can’t buy wine at the supermarket.

    10. Playa Manhattan

      Pineapple Sculpin. Per usual.

      It’ll be my last beer for a while.

    11. GSL in E

      We got our taxes done today, so … a lot of beer.

    12. Grummun

      Kindred’s Salvage Porter. I can’t really recommend it, but I bought it, so now I gotta choke it down.

    13. I had vodka and schnapps while watching a hockey game, followed by a tennis match.

  5. From the I would laugh…

    Of course, there is always the chance that this ridiculous warmth should be taken as a distressing sign of our oddly no-precipitation-allowed, climate-change-denialist-for-EPA-chief times. Hopefully this doesn’t also mean utter damnation for the summer months.

    To be sure, somebody might not be moonlighting for the Chicagoist.

  6. The Fusionist

    This article in the Conservative Review goes out on a limb and suggests that it would be unconstitutional for California to secede from the Union.

    There’s even some quotes from the Catholic intellectual Orestes Brownson:

    “The simple fact is that the political or sovereign people of the United States exists as United States, and only as united states. The Union and the states are coeval, born together, and can exist only together. Separation is dissolution—the death of both. The United States are a state, a single sovereign state; but this single sovereign state consists in the union and solidarity of the states instead of individuals. The Union is in each of the states, and each of the states is in the Union….

    “This division of the powers of government … rendered possible and practicable by the original constitution of the people themselves, as one people existing and acting through state organizations, is the American method…. The American method demands no … antagonism, no neutralizing of one social force by another, but avails itself of all the forces of society, organizes them dialectically, not antagonistically, and thus protects with equal efficiency both public authority and private rights.”

    1. Don’t blow your load in the first five minutes of the links, Eddie. Read a few posts and relax.

      1. John Titor

        I don’t think he’s allowed to do that without at least feeling bad and going to confession afterwards.

        1. Swiss Servator

          *opera applause*

    2. Swiss Servator

      Yeah, did I not give enough links m’self?

      ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?

      1. The Fusionist

        The mods are moody, I’ll sit tight until they get more…relaxed.

        1. I’m perfectly calm, Dude.

          1. Slammer

            Calmer’en you are

          2. +1 gun drawn on the lanes

          3. Slammer

            They’re calling the cops, man

          4. The Fusionist

            Never mind me, I was making a drunkenness joke. Also my social skills are underdeveloped. What’s offensive coming from a normal person is quaint and idiosyncratic coming from me.

            Don’t send me back to that other site, I claim asylum.

          5. Eddie, you put the ass in asylum.

            (I keed!)

          6. Better than putting the soul in asylum.

          7. trshmnstr

            *begins coding a “block users” feature*

            /jk

          8. DOOMco

            I don’t think the TOP MEN here are afraid of the banhammer.

          9. trshmnstr

            We’ll eventually get around to a block users feature for Monocle. It’s really low priority.
            Sometimes personalities conflict and people just can’t stand one another. I’d prefer them have the option of blocking one another rather than shitting up threads with petty squabbling.

          10. Google cut off my monocle privileges this morning and told me to tell you to tell them that you should put your extension in their chrome app place if i wanna use it again. Could be I don’t know what I’m doing and if there is a work around let me know if not no sweat.

          11. trshmnstr

            I’m not exactly sure what would cause that. I run Firefox, so I don’t have that issue. Anybody running Chrome know what’s going on?

          12. Tacit Rainbow

            @trshmnstr on February 18, 2017, 8:43 PM

            Oh ,hey, what are the priorities? I’d love to pitch in where I could.

          13. trshmnstr

            Higher priority is stuff like getting an options element set up to allow the user to toggle all of the features, change view mode, etc.
            I was thinking about maybe tackling a “newest first” view while keeping the threading in tact, as well as converting links into pics/embedded video.

            There are a few bugfixes to be done, such as making sure all of the siblings of a new comment are shown when old threads are hidden, getting rid of “COMMENT” when you click an HTML tag button without typing text, and adjusting the spacing of the comments without a reply button.

            Low priority is user blocking, comment promotion (highlight a different color after a certain number of +1 and “This. ” replies), reply by clicking anywhere on the comment, and a zillion other small things that have been suggested.

            One thing I would love to attempt is a client-side dynamic refresh of the comments. Unfortunately, I haven’t made much headway on that, yet.

            Here’s the project, I’ll get you the required permissions to tinker.

          14. Slammer

            SANCTUARY! SANCTUARY!

          15. The Fusionist

            For some reason I have a thing for this song.

          16. Mike Schmidt

            Good tune. I like me some Cult from time to time

          17. Run, runner!

            -Logan 5

      2. bacon-magic

        I’m staying alive.

      3. bacon-magic

        I liked the fever reference. ????

        1. Heroic Mulatto

          You keep playing with fire with each emoji, bacon.

          1. Lucie Furr

            Mm Mm! Xtra crispy bacon!!

          2. bacon-magic

            Is it taboo? *waves arms in mystic/drinken pattern*

    3. A single state? Why is treason described as making war against “them”?

  7. John Titor

    Don’t listen to Stan Rogers while drinking, now I long for Horse Girls again.

    1. Hyperion

      Excellent horse like woman?

      1. DEG

        You really need a link for that song.

    2. Heroic Mulatto

      There’s always Monster Musume, John.

      1. John Titor

        Less literal horse girls, more equestrians. I am tempted, but I will not yield. Horse girls are the path of darkness and destruction of the soul.

        Bitches be crazy.

        1. Brett L

          And will also break you in half with those strong, controlling thighs.

    3. Brett L

      Faster women, younger whiskey, older horses?

      1. Swiss Servator

        Well, 1 out of 3….

  8. Pan Zagloba

    No “You know who else…” in the video, 0/10!

    So, speaking of donation-like things, have you considered setting up a Patreon account? If a bunch of professional victims can use it for the “professional” part of their life, why not our Beloved Server?

    1. trshmnstr

      It was either a Jacket joke or a Hitler joke. I figured since the Jacket is immortal, the Jacket joke would have more longevity.

      1. SQWRLZ

        Nice job on the video with Hitler, The Commentariat, The Jacket… I was laughing my ass off.

    2. Swiss Servator

      We have, eventually something will be done. Right now us founders kicked in enough, and with the work of our invaluable web goddess SP….here we are.

      Note: others were more generous than I was.

      1. Volren

        I would be happy to donate, assuming you will take lowly Canadian money.

  9. From state keep us safe.

    Oroville Mayor Linda Dahlmeier immediately began praying for those closer to the dam when she heard the first drops of rain hit the metal roof of her home Thursday.
    “You just start bawling,” Dahlmeier said. “This is Mother Nature’s hand.”

    Gaia hates them for letting the deniers get elected. Welcome to Trumps America.

    1. Praying? Over the weather?

      I thought that was for hicks elected in places like Georgia.

      1. Brett L

        It’s different when you pray to Gaia!

        1. Swiss Servator

          What Brett said.

          *rubs crystal to focus aura*

          1. trshmnstr

            Really didn’t need to know your nickname for your junk.

          2. Heroic Mulatto

            In college, mine got stuck with the nickname “Charlie Brown”.

          3. Brett L

            You’ll kick that football one day, buddy.

          4. Swiss Servator

            “You’re a good man, Charlie Brown “

          5. Banjos

            That brings new meaning to “Great Pumpkin”.

          6. Heroic Mulatto

            @Banjos

            Because it never comes?

          7. Slammer

            Is it a blockhead?

          8. Because it never comes?

            I never pegged you one for retarded ejaculation, HM.

            Charlie Brown never was bright, yanno. At least after he was Flanderised, that is.

            TW: Retards and TV Tropes

          9. trshmnstr

            *cough*Monocle Update*cough*

            greasonable has ported the HTML tag buttons from TSTSNBN-greasonable to Monocle. There are a few things that still need worked out, but you don’t need to manually enter HTML tags anymore!

          10. trshmnstr

            I have no clue how this got nested over here… This wasn’t supposed to be a reply

          11. Slammer

            Does that work for Android phones? Great work btw

          12. trshmnstr

            I’m not sure about android phones. My gut feeling says you’re probably not able to download user scripts onto mobile chrome/firefox, but I could be wrong.

          13. Mike Schmidt

            OK. I gotta ask. What the hell is Monocle? Every time I click on it, all that happens is I see code. Which is better than seeing dead people, but still…

          14. trshmnstr

            What browser do you use? I’ll forward install instructions based on that.

          15. Mike Schmidt

            Firefox

          16. trshmnstr

            Easiest way for Firefox is to download Greasemonkey, restart your browser, click the above link (including any confirmation of install), and refresh this page. You’ll see the Monocle toolbar at the bottom and notice some formatting enhancements.

          17. Hyperion

            The threading is intolerable without Monocle. At least with Monocle you know when a new post has been made. Sort of like Reasonable, but different. You’ll figure out how it works really quickly after you install it.

          18. Mike Schmidt

            Oh wow. Thanks trshmnstr! Much better!

          19. Francisco d’Anconia

            trshmnstr

            I downloaded it and nothing happens. Restarted browser and nothing. WHen I go to your link a second time it says Reinstall, so I assume it installed. What am I doing wrong?

            I’m using Chrome. I have Tampermonkey already for Greasonable.

          20. trshmnstr

            You may be required to enable it somewhere in the settings. I’m not familiar with Tampermonkey, but if it’s like Greasemonkey, then sometimes the script gets loaded in a disabled state.

          21. I’m using chrome as well and can’t keep it running , seems if it’s not in the chrome store they disable it for you. this is the message I get——If you need to use a disabled extension, you can contact the extension’s developer and ask them to upload their extension to the Chrome Web Store. This will allow you, and other people who use Chrome, to install that extension from the Chrome Web Store, or if you already have it installed, to manually re-enable it from your list of extensions.–might try using IE just for Glib or just suffer without really cool comment interface abilities, such is the sad lot I have drawn.

          22. trshmnstr

            Temporary fix for the “Chrome Web Store” error is to enable developer mode in the settings. It’ll still bug you on startup to shut off developer mode, but at least you’ll get the functionality.

            I think that downloading the tampermonkey extension and loading Monocle through tampermonkey may fix the error, too. Perhaps I should fire up Chrome and figure out what’s going on.

          23. trshmnstr

            Okay, I fired up Chrome. Definitely install tampermonkey first, it gets rid of the bitching from Chrome. Once you install tampermonkey, click the link again and it should install as a user script (you’ll see a tab pop up with a bunch of crap in it, including an install button).

            Regarding it not running with tampermonkey, can you tell me what you’re seeing if you click the tampermonkey button? I’m seeing something that shows Monocle with a little toggle switch set to “on.”

          24. Tampermonkey did the trick, I don’t even know what I did but loaded TM and then monocle was working again, and maybe you changed it since yesterday but It seems to have new features now also, Tampermonkey FTW or GTFO or SOATIDR!!

          25. Francisco d’Anconia

            Ok, working now after a computer restart.

            thx

          26. trshmnstr

            Sweet! All the fires have been extinguished!

          27. Spoke too soon, restarted and chrome is again disabling it for me, because I’m too stupid to decide which extensions to run on my own computer, fuck chrome gonna try IE, even though i think i started using chrome because ‘fuck IE’, but it’s late and I’m drunkish so I’ll give it a go mañana.

          28. Mike Schmidt

            Fuck Chrome and IE. Get Firefox

          29. Wasn’t as drunkish as I thunkish, uninstalled everything reinstalled Tampermonkey then Monocle then restart and good. for now. we’ll see.

  10. I’m tired of having a bigger vocabulary than my laptop. Apparently whatever’s running the spell check on this thing is an unlettered rube.

    Here’s one of the first returns on a google search for “fixing spell checker vocabulary”.

    On April 30, 2007, with all the usual fanfare that accompanies a software update, Microsoft added Barack and Obama to Office’s dictionary. It was a fairly quick canonization for the Illinois senator. His surname had been on Microsoft’s candidate list for new words since Jan. 5 of that year, and his first name followed three days later, in the same recruiting class as Zune, Klum, and Friendster. Three months later, it was official—no longer would Microsoft suggest Boatman as a replacement for the future president’s last name.

    Of course, by April 2007 Obama was already a figure of some renown. He’d announced his bid for the Democratic nomination in mid-January and had been an object of intense fascination since his July 2004 speech at the Democratic Convention. But escaping the shackles of Microsoft Word’s red corrugated line is no small feat, and the list of those who’ve made the cut can seem arbitrary: Why does it recognize the surnames of Matthew Broderick and Susan Sarandon but trip over DiCaprio and Blanchett? They’ve heard of Friendster, but not Facebook? Does Microsoft really want to start something with Mark Wahlberg? (Or, speaking of Entourage, with Jeremy Piven?)

    *back button*

    Even if the answer’s there, as the headline claims – maybe buried way at the bottom – not worth it. I’ll keep looking.

    1. Heroic Mulatto

      Three months later, it was official—no longer would Microsoft suggest Boatman as a replacement for the future president’s last name.

      NOOO!
      Pictured: Mike M. on the day of the announcement

      1. Swiss Servator

        *drops wine glass, staggers up and begins thunderous ovation*

      2. [Private Message]
        We’re still planning on pulling the plug on this fun little experiment on Monday morning, right HM? Or is it tomorrow?

        1. Heroic Mulatto

          [begin encoding
          type: hexadecimal]
          46 75 63 6b 20 62 69 74 63 68 65 73 20 67 65 74 20 70 61 69 64
          [end encoding]

          1. DEG

            I thought that was ASCII.

          2. SQWRLZ

            You’re a gigolo?

  11. Tacit Rainbow

    What? Links on a Saturday? This is madness. Madness! You’ll get engagement, and interest. Such BS. Everyone knows that to build a brand you should shit on your comm…cust…whatevers and rely on signalling to get the word out.

    1. DOOMco

      +1 facebook share

    2. Swiss Servator

      I was day drinking and bored. I won’t let it happen again…

      Or I will.

      1. trshmnstr

        day drinking

        When you name it, people can shame it!

        1. John Titor

          It’s like 3 am in Zurich, it’s fine.

          1. Swiss Servator

            Were I in Zürich, I would be full of raclette and shitfaced on kirschwasser…. Sigh.

          2. DEG

            I’ve looked for Kirschwasser in New Hampshire. Best I can find is Arrow Cordials. Nothing from the Old Country.

          3. Brett L

            I’ve got this Leffe Blond Belgian that’s too sweet. Better drink it all and pick better next time.

      2. Mike Schmidt

        Don’t I get any credit for pointing out that you had to do a PM links due to your naming the AM links…?

        1. Swiss Servator

          $.01….rounded down.

          1. Playa Manhattan

            This coupon is non-redeemable. Cash value 1/20th of one cent.

          2. Mike Schmidt

            *narrows gaze*

          3. SQWRLZ

            Mike Schmidt, I may be missing something revealed in H&R, but are you the actual Phillies #20, or someone playing him on the Internetz?

            I know everyone, I’m a rube.

          4. Mike Schmidt

            I’ve been waiting impatiently for someone to ask me that. The name is really mine, the picture is not.

          5. Brett L

            Why should that no talent ass-clown get to use my name?

          6. Playa Manhattan

            He’s the one who sucks!

          7. SQWRLZ

            Hey!
            He’s a GenX icon, like Evel Knievel or Bruce Jenner (oh, jeez) , or Lee Majors.

      3. Playa Manhattan

        Swiss cares about the customers, dammit!

        1. Swiss Servator

          Every paying one of them!!!!

  12. DOOMco

    So….any of you been in Alaska lately? Asking for a friend.
    Not since I was very young.
    so, what are people’s top strains?

    1. John Titor

      “Hey, what can I get for forty bucks?”

      /Teenage and University Me.

      1. DenverJ

        Same as in town?

        1. The Fusionist

          JUDGE #1: “How much do you give a street hooker?”

          JUDGE #2: “Fifty bucks, but make sure it’s in cash not credit card because…oh, wait, what *sentence*? Six months suspended.”

      2. DOOMco

        The world’s changed now!

    2. Can’t speak to Alaskan, but Super Lemon Haze is the stuff that had me thinking we’d been roofied in Denver.

      Can recommend.

  13. DenverJ

    I think the other post died about the time i showed up: purely coincidentally I’m sure.
    Anywhoose:
    Hellooooooo everybody! Great site! Wonderful!

    Also, you know who else left one place for another?

    1. trshmnstr

      Moses?

    2. DOOMco

      Benedict Arnold?

    3. The Fusionist

      Alcibiades?

      1. DenverJ

        Yes, Eddie, I was talking about Alcibiades. Sheesh
        *Rolls eyes*

        1. trshmnstr

          This is a new wrinkle to the game. I didn’t realize that sufficiently esoteric responses would be mocked… Now I want to change my answer!

          1. DenverJ

            Right, trahmnstr, I invented a new wrinkle to the game.
            Sheesh
            *Rolls eyes*

          2. Mike Schmidt

            Damn, you even sound like Bender

          3. DenverJ

            Why, thank you!
            *Blushes*

    4. Slammer

      The Clovis people?

    5. Sham?

      (I know it’s not too obscure for this crowd, so I went with it)

      1. Slammer

        The thoroughbred?

        1. Yep. Place to Place.

          Give that man a kewpie doll!

          1. How the fuck is there not a YouTube video of that scene in Stalag 17? Dammit!

    6. DEG

      Beethoven?

    7. Mike Schmidt

      The chicken?

      1. The Fusionist

        I think that answer is the best.

    8. Playa Manhattan

      Charles Krauthammer?
      Er, maybe not. He’s stuck in the same place.

      1. bacon-magic

        He should challenge Hawking to a chariot race.

      2. Charles Krauthammer?

        Er, maybe not. He’s stuck in the same place.

        It’s just how he rolls.

    9. Hyperion

      “I think the other post died about the time i showed up: purely coincidentally I’m sure.”

      Oh, yeah, I remember that. it’s about the same time the site was ruined for good (:

      Ok, you need to go back and read my reply to your reply.

      1. DenverJ

        I did. I know.

    10. Swiss Servator

      Abraham?

  14. Mexicans, pot and ass sex…
    They are our bread and butter.

    Homerun by the trshmnstr.

    1. The Fusionist

      Hmmm…usually I like Mexican food but somehow I lost my appetite…

      1. DenverJ

        I usually like bread and butter…

      2. Brett L

        Ass sex is as catholic as The Pope.

        1. The Fusionist

          Ooh, SugarFreed! Someone doesn’t like your jokes.

          1. Brett L

            Frank Zappa will not be mocked!

          2. Swiss Servator

            Is that our first SF’d link?!

          3. Brett L

            Motherfucker!!!!

          4. butt-head

            I like this routine. You should take it on the road.

          5. Mike Schmidt

            Yeah, like far down the road

        2. Nephilium

          You mean the Loophole?

  15. Juvenile Bluster

    My daughter was supposed to sleep over at grandma’s house tonight. Alone time with the wife!

    Except the kid decided she didn’t want to stay here alone, so she asked me to stay here too.

    And my mother laid the Jewish Mother Guilt Trip ™ on me, so I’m now at my mom’s house as well.

    And my mom bought the kid this book about the Notorious RBG as a present.

    And there’s no alcohol in the house.

    Send help.

    1. John Titor

      I don’t know how all you people know so many people in your lives who try to insert their politics into bloody everything.

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        Consider yourself very lucky that you don’t.

    2. Mike Schmidt

      Oh my gawd. Is that the 3rd or 4th ring of hell? You poor, poor man.

    3. DenverJ

      You, my friend, are in a world of hurt. See if grubhub will bring you booze.

    4. OMWC is on his way…

      1. The Fusionist

        Alternate response: Here is the book you need.

      2. DenverJ

        What “populations that we don’t want to have too many of” do you think the nice liberal judge lady was talking about?

        1. Brett L

          Three generations of idiots is enough!

    5. Brett L

      My parents took my kids to lunch so my spousal duties are long complete. Now it’s time to drink myself stupid and hope I can survive the kids since it’s my wife’s morning to sleep in. Please Lord, let the Benadryl work.

      1. Can’t you just both sleep in and teach the kids how to make waffles on their own?

        1. Brett L

          The 18 month old still burns them.

          1. jesse.in.mb

            Oatmeal in the rice cooker with a timer, have the older kid dish it out, burn the house down to clean up the dried oatmeal mess they make.

          2. Brett L

            I have an instapot. Which. Yeah. It’s a rental anyhow.

          3. jesse.in.mb

            Perfect. Throw some dried fruit in, let it soak overnight and have it finish cooking about when they get up. I’ve been doing it lately for weekday breakfasts and it’s great front loading the effort.

          4. Yeah. They’re moving soon anyway, right?

          5. Brett L

            Exactly. I’m probably doing the owner a favor.

          6. Not just the owner, but the entire economy. Paul Krugman would approve!

    6. jesse.in.mb

      Postmates?

    7. Hyperion

      Damn, that is an emergency. No booze or sex? Unpossible! You won’t survive the night. Does Glibertarians have an emergency rescue team?

      1. The Fusionist

        I think Warty makes house calls.

        1. jesse.in.mb

          If only.

          1. I’m pretty sure that dental dam you’re holding up with go the the way of the Oroville Disaster whilst cradling the DOOMCOCK; you may need something with a bit more….oomph.

        2. Juvenile Bluster

          …I’m not sure if that’d be a good thing.

        3. Brett L

          If we ever do have a rescue squad it will obviously be called the DoomCock.

          1. Hyperion

            So it’s gonna be even worse than calling the cops?

          2. Playa Manhattan

            It depends on how you feel about that sort of thing

      2. Brett L

        Fire up the drones!

    8. Rhywun

      #1 Best Seller in Children’s Social Activists Biographies

      LOLOLOLOL

      1. jesse.in.mb

        Back in my day that category was absolutely dominated Fanny J Crosby.

        How times have changed.

    9. Playa Manhattan

      My parents are taking the kids tonight. Voluntarily. And then for the rest of the week.

      Fuckface took a 4 hour nap today, so he’s going to be trouble tonight.

      1. Brett L

        They knew what they were getting into.

        1. Playa Manhattan

          And my phone will be off.

          1. Brett L

            You lived. They’ll be fine. Angry and resentful but fine.

        2. Swiss Servator

          “The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy”

    10. The Fusionist

      This article in the Forward explains that Ginsburg is simply a tool of the Patriarchy.

      “Suggesting that women called the shots from behind the scenes of the biblical narrative plays into the claims of those who insist women have always had private power in Judaism and thus don’t need a public say in religious affairs….

      “Male dominance for the greater part of Jewish history should not be dismissed with a reference to Miriam, whether in the service of shoring up gender norms or to the Passover story a comfortably feminine slant. If you want to rectify a problem or prevent its recurrence, you can’t turn your back on the fact that it happened. And Passover is about confronting history, with all the ignominies and regrettable circumstances it entails. We wouldn’t want to rewrite the Passover story to make it sound like we weren’t really slaves to Pharaoh, and we shouldn’t retell it in a way that implies men weren’t really in charge.”

    11. Tacit Rainbow

      I had a suicide joke, but that’s not cool. I suggest finding the shadiest restaurant delivery place and ordering a handle of cheap booze. (+ Calo in Chicago)

    12. The Fusionist

      “In the old days, when there was no Internet, people wrote letters on paper and sent their letters and packages through the government Postal Service. Of course, the Postal Service was filled with hacks and it charged too much.

      “So Lysander Spooner decided he’d deliver people’s mail without them having to go through the Postal Service.

      “The Post Office hacks whined like little bitches, but at least they lowered their rates a bit.

      “Later, Lysander decided that the so-called U.S. Constitution wasn’t a real law. He’d never agreed to it after all….”

      “Are you reading that nice biography of Justice Ginsburg?”

      “Yes, yes, I’m just riffing on it a bit.”

  16. Brett L

    It’s a Drive by Truckers night. Hard to believe this song is going on 20 years old.

    1. Viking1865

      The live version is better, because they play Gimme Three Steps as well.

      1. Brett L

        Couldn’t find good audio at YouTube for the live version.

  17. Hyperion

    Other site spy drone /ON

    Tony: By lefties you mean black people don’t you?

    spy drone /OFF

    1. John Titor

      I draw the line at directly taking quotes from trolls on the other site and carting them over here. Complaining about articles or the comments, fine, but I have no reason to give a shit what Tony thinks about anything unless I’m directly interacting with him.

      1. Hyperion

        It’s not intended to ‘care’ about what Tony thinks. It’s the hilariousness of his stupidity. What does ‘draw a line’ mean. Does that mean it’s forbidden?

        1. John Titor

          Not forbidden, just boring.I’m just bitching because it’s the same thing over and over again. Tony calls us racist and stupid, the end.

          1. Hyperion

            I disagree. Tony can actually be pretty entertaining at times. I mean, I’m glad he will not be allowed to post that shit here, but still, he comes up with some doozies. I’m mean someone of it is better than any sarcasm anyone can intentionally come up with.

          2. jesse.in.mb

            I’m pretty sure he puts the least amount of effort into getting the most kicked beehive response. He really doesn’t have much effort to get a flurry of anger from the regulars.

          3. Hyperion

            I completely ignore him most of the time. But occasionally he says something so incredibly stupid that I have to slap him up side of the head. Seriously, there is not even any posters on Salon as dumb as Tony. He’s a real piece of work. Like the time he threatened to have Obama kill all libertarians with Cruz missiles.

          4. Mythical Libertarian Woman

            I have this theory that Tony may be one of my relatives, which is kind of funny but mostly horrible.

          5. I actually know who Tony is. For realsies. His first name is Anthony.

          6. Mythical Libertarian Woman

            @Groovus That does not negatively impact my theory. Unfortunately.

          7. Heroic Mulatto

            The plot thickens!

          8. That does not negatively impact my theory. Unfortunately.

            Did the Anthony you know earn an undergraduate degree in Poli Sci from a central southern, private Uni?

        2. DenverJ

          Forbotten. Sounds better in the original German 😉

          1. DenverJ

            Oh look! It made my little semi-colon and end parenthesis a whatchamacallit!

          2. Swiss Servator

            The verbotten emoji!

          3. DenverJ

            Is there an … “emoji”(?)… That has the narrowed gays?

          4. bacon-magic

            ????

          5. Mike Schmidt

            Jeezus, don’t get bacon and HM going with the emojis. They have no shame

          6. jesse.in.mb

            There’s an Aesop’s Fable for that, Mr. Schmidt.

            Zeus and Shame

            When Zeus fashioned man he gave him certain inclinations, but he forgot about shame. Not knowing how to introduce her, he ordered her to enter through the rectum. Shame, of course, baulked at the idea and was highly indignant. Finally she said to Zeus: “Fine! I’ll go in, but on one condition: if Eros follows me in the same way I’m leaving immediately!”

            Ever since then all homosexuals are without shame.

          7. Mike Schmidt

            Thanks for the fable Jesse. It was very enlightening.

          8. Heroic Mulatto

            First it’s a 🙂 then it’s a cell phone, then it’s a top hat…and then tomorrow we wake to threads full of this:

            hey ????????you christmas ????????⛄⛄elf ????????⛄⛄lookin bitches????????⛄⛄ it’s the end ????????❌❌of HOEvember ????????????????but that means the beginning???????????????? of DICKcember ????????✊????????it’s time to hoe???? hoe ????hoe ????all over a big ol dick???????????????????????? tis the season to be all over that dick ????????????????if someone sent you this it means you’re a hoe ass bitch ????????????????????????resend to 1????5????other reindeer bitches who need to get ????????DICKed ????????t????he fuc????????k ⛄????DOWNNN ????????????????this holiday season if you don’t resend this❌❌????????????you’re a christmas???? elf ⛄lookin ????ass ????bitch???????? who???????? aint gettin no dick❌❌???????? merry dickmas????????????????????

      2. Francisco d’Anconia

        Don’t worry, I’m sure he’ll be here soon.

        1. Hyperion

          He’d be banned in 2 minutes. He’s not smart enough and doesn’t have control of himself enough to try to trick anyone. He’ll get drunk and go off on a hate tirade against libertarians first time he gets to log in.

          1. Francisco d’Anconia

            There has been much discussion about the banhammer…

          2. Hyperion

            Well, known trolls, like shreek and Tony need to be banned. Other than that, I hope they tread lightly with that, and I’m sure they will. You know how sarcastic and ornery libertarians are, and there is 100% sure to be spats and feuds. It’s just the way it is.

          3. Who you calling ornery, asshole!

          4. __Warren__

            Look, for the final time, I’m not putting on spats just to have a feud.

          5. Francisco d’Anconia

            Opinions vary widely.

            It’s a tricky topic. How does a libertarian site justify banning dissenting opinion?

            And then where do you draw the line? There are folks I’d call trolls that others wouldn’t.

            Who decides?

            My personal opinion is to use the hammer only when the individual is disruptive or abusive. (Despite my deep personal desire to use it more liberally.)

          6. trshmnstr

            This is where a “block user” feature will be helpful. Banhammer the anti-social behavior, let the users block the annoying people.

  18. Rufus the Monocled

    OMG! OMG! OMG! /catches breath.

    I just realized what where will I migrate my ‘Hello’ reserved for the AM/PM links?!?!?

    1. Ahem, you mean the morning and afternoon links.

    2. Brett L

      Okay, first take a drink. Second, we tolerate your Francophone ways here. You can totally say “Allo” and we will still love you. Be yourself buddy.

      1. Uh, Rufus is an allophone.

    3. jesse.in.mb

      Rufus, do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law (unless it pisses off the mods). Put your hello wherever it pleases you.

      1. DenverJ

        Put your hello wherever it pleases you.

        That’s a helluva euphamism.

    4. __Warren__

      Woah woah woah! We’re allowing Canadians in here?

      1. Hyperion

        It’s too late, brah, the invasion is complete.

      2. Swiss Servator

        They snuck in before we could bar the door – once you have ’em…. so we figured best to make nice now that they are here.

        1. jesse.in.mb

          God, Swiss, don’t let them know we know they’re here. I’ve been setting Canuck traps all day and now they’re going to be wary of them.

          *dismantles ’90s comedy night set*

        2. Hyperion

          What’s the problem with Canadians? They’re just like Americans, only they talk funny. Now the French ones, lord, do NOT let those fuckers in here.

          1. John Titor

            Criss de calice de tabarnak d’osti de sacrament!

          2. Hyperion

            See what I mean?

          3. jesse.in.mb

            *opens portcullis for first Montrealer to bring me poutine or all dressed chips*

          4. DEG

            Poutine is food of the gods.

          5. Fun Fact: The very first time I heard the word, “Poutine,” I thought it was slang for Female Naughty Bits.

          6. Rufus the Monocled

            I believe Broswater is French-Canadian. Ted’s knowledge of Quebec’s ridiculous labeling tags – Francophone, Anglophone and Allophone – is impressive. The again, he listens to the CBC.

    5. DEG

      Hello

    6. Slammer

      Adele should have been sued by Rufus a long time ago.

      1. DenverJ

        Adele should have been horsewhipped for that song.

    7. bacon-magic

      Has fist migrated?

  19. DenverJ

    Welch et al: whar my commentariat at?

    1. Slammer

      He needs to see the Hitler video

    2. Brett L

      Just let that other site be itself. We don’t need updates. Those that want will visit.

      1. trshmnstr

        This.

    3. Francisco d’Anconia

      H&R got a total of 280 comments today.

      1. DenverJ

        200 of which were from dajjal

        1. Pomp

          Reason should watch their media buy/Taboola revenue stats and see if there’s a correlation with loss of revenue and dajjal crapflooding. Bro makes a hot case for a shitcanning because it’s so fucking deranged.

          1. Pat

            Shreek can’t even begin to hold a candle to pre-registration Mary Stack/White Indian. Man was that a fun time.

          2. I whitelisted every single advertisement related line of code from TPTSNBN(tm). So’s I never generated any revenue for them anyway, outside of donations.

        2. SQWRLZ

          D00d, please…
          Stop inciting it.
          Do not feed.

    1. butt-head

      Those comments…

      1. The Fusionist

        Holy shit.

  20. John Titor

    Jeffrey Tucker kicks Richard Spencer out of International Students for Liberty Conference.

    I wonder why it is that (unless you spent time on Radix like I did) almost no one knew who Spencer was and he wasn’t floating around events for attention until the 2016 election and the left started screaming about the alt-right.

    Thanks Clinton.

    1. The Fusionist

      Deja vu

    2. Brett L

      It’s almost like his actions got exactly what he wanted. Let the neo-nazi wander around.

      1. The Fusionist

        Like a cuckoo bird laying its eggs in someone else’s nest? I think the libertarians reserved that private venue.

        1. butt-head

          Yeah, I’d be pretty ticked off if that blowhard weaseled his way into my conference.

          But shouting him down and calling him a fascist doesn’t help you, and in fact really just provokes the drawing of unfortunate parallels (no matter how actually-valid they are) to certain other censorious groups.

          Easier to say as a calm third-party with hindsight, though.

          1. The Fusionist

            OK, true, best to call hotel security and say Spencer crashed the event…

      2. butt-head

        It’s as if Tucker was afraid that certain media would associate him and the ISFLC’s views with Spencer’s—as if those media won’t do so anyway, or smear them in some other way.

        His theatrical display of outrage was counterproductive.

        1. Heroic Mulatto

          His theatrical display

          This is Jeffery Tucker we’re talking about.

          Jeffery. Tucker.

          1. John Titor

            The man wears a bow tie people.

          2. butt-head

            …………touché

        2. Frank Mansfield

          Tucker reportedly wrote much of the Ron Paul newsletter content so he sort of left himself open to those “associations”.

      3. jesse.in.mb

        Something like that is a lose lose. If you kick him out it gets him attention, but if you let him wander around someone looking for a salacious story takes a picture of him at the event and writes about how obviously welcome he is.

        1. The Fusionist

          Suggestion: Invite him to debate at some neutral forum, let him give the case for his Whitopia, examine him on how it’s actually going to be enforced in practice, get him on record rejecting the Declaration of Independence, etc.

        2. Heroic Mulatto

          It was more than just him attending.

          White Nationalist and Alt-Right leader Richard Spencer had a heated confrontation with FEE head Jeffrey Tucker after the former had set up an impromptu booth in a dining hall at the hotel venue.

          I believe that’s called “soliciting”. If the dude wanted a platform, let him rent a hotel ballroom himself. It’s just tacky to suck onto Tucker’s event like a tick.

        3. butt-head

          If a reporter wants to write a #VeryFakeNews (heh) yellow-journalism smear story, no amount of attempted minimization of potential angles will stop him. Libertarians aren’t suddenly going to have laudatory stories written about them, no matter what they do.

          1. The Fusionist

            Ask, “can I set up a pro-Declaration of Independence table at your next private event without being hassled?”

    3. Heroic Mulatto

      Dear God, the comments to that article…

      1. John Titor

        The election and the spotlight on them has driven the alt-right to think they’re in ascendancy, so now you get their internet mob morons randomly showing up and spewing their ‘brilliance’ everywhere. Clinton saddled the entire public discourse with this idiocy so she could score a few points with her base.

        1. Heroic Mulatto

          It’s just infuriating how they think “free speech” means “crash an event and then play martyrdom games when asked to leave.”

          It’s a textbook example of sea-lioning. And this shit is applauded by pack of gibbering microcephalic apes!

          1. John Titor

            I don’t think it’s about free speech, it’s Alinskyite posturing. Hold your opponent to their own standard and all that. Spencer and his ilk just want to obliterate as much of the legitimacy of other groups as they can so they can try to worm their way into a solidified part of the public discourse. Sure, their base eats it up like the internet mob it is, but I’m guessing Spencer thinks he’s some bloody combination of Machiavelli and Nietzsche running a brilliant long term plan.

          2. The Fusionist

            Since he rejects the Declaration of Independence, we can rule out the possibility that he believes in inalienable rights except for himself and his allies.

          3. Pomp

            That makes sense. I’ve always felt that “Heil Trump” stunt he did in DC that got captured on film with troglodytes throwing the Nazi salute, was a worming/parasitic tactic to generate beaucoup controversial coverage, with the side benefit of picking up new troglodytes into the movement from the exposure. That, and the result probably gave him a chubby.

          4. jesse.in.mb

            You might find this article interesting.

      2. DenverJ

        Well, from the quick scan i did, the libertarians are being called out for hypocrisy, ie calling the cops to remove someone who was unwelcome because bad thinking.
        Are they wrong?

        1. Heroic Mulatto

          No, he was unwelcome because he opened a booth at Tucker’s convention without paying an exhibitor’s fee.

          1. The Fusionist

            Don’t you see, any libertarian who wants to use force against a trespasser is a hypocrite!

          2. Heroic Mulatto

            Well, unless the trespasser is a negro or China-man, of course.

        2. John Titor

          Private event, Spencer was soliciting, nothing in libertarian orthodoxy saying you can’t kick someone out of a private event for failing to comply with general rules of said event.

        3. Mike Schmidt

          Obviously that shit weasel was baiting Tucker, but Tucker swallowed the bait hook, line, and sinker. I can’t say the hypocrisy claim isn’t legit.

    4. chemjeff

      I knew who Richard Spencer was before the election, because even back in 2014-15 or so, the “cuck” slur and the ((( ))) crap kept showing up on right-wing websites and I went investigating to see what they meant. It was eye-opeening for sure.

  21. Gilmore

    How does one start submitting “articles” for this thing?

    I felt like making a brief commentary on the following @ H&R but skipped it, thinking it was wasted

    America’s Top 40 173: #1 Songs from 1840-2013

    1. Gilmore

      See? sugarfreed the very first link. typical.

      second try

      1. There is a submit/suggest thing on the upper right I think of main page.

      2. DEG

        “I’ll Make Love to You” set to a picture of Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky. HAH!

    2. butt-head

      It surprises me how many of those earlier, 19th-C. songs I recognize.

      1. Gilmore

        SIV noted that 19th century minstrel songs are probably *still* under-represented even tho Stephen Foster had like 4 or 5 #1 mentions.

      2. DEG

        Same here.

    3. jesse.in.mb

      Geez look at this guy, not even out of moderation and he’s looking to be an author.

      1. butt-head

        Dream big

      2. Gilmore

        i come with sterling references.

        1. DenverJ

          Euphamism?

    4. GIL! Thank The Maker!

      Shai Halud (or an unreasonable facsimile – see wots aj dids ‘ere? Didja?) is here! Now all we need is P Brooks, and My Glib Bucket List is mostly kicked.

      1. butt-head

        ProLib, but I think he’s gone altogether? 🙁

        1. ProLib, but I think he’s gone altogether? ????

          He commented on the passing of Jerome Tucille. I also emailed Pro’L Dib with a warm invite. Yet to hear a response; he may honestly, for whatever reason

          I also emailed Fluffy; no response as of yet.

          1. for whatever reason…

            …he may be unable to participate at this time. He has brain cancer, GBM, to be precise.

          2. DEG

            Oh no

      2. DenverJ

        You look just like I’d imagined, doc.

        1. “Ben?! Hi! Victor Hugo!”

          Clicky my linky. Chevy, as a performer, is probably my all time fave.

    5. Brett L

      Please tell me you’re doing a fashion feature.

      1. Gilmore

        My brief foray into that area was on behalf of Matt Welch. My work there seems mostly done. That persona has ridden into the sunset while other men’s wives silently weep.

        1. Brett L

          Mine for one. For some reason paisley ties over plaid shirts and a brown suit get shit from the wife.

          1. Gilmore

            paisley ties over plaid shirts

  22. trshmnstr

    How does one start submitting “articles” for this thing?

    Send them by word doc to the email “submit” at this website .com

    1. Gilmore

      Thanks

      is there any guide for protocol w/ formatting, html, etc?

      1. trshmnstr

        Download Monocle (the link is upthread somewhere), and use the buttons to do the formatting for you.

        1. trshmnstr

          Oh, I’m stupid… you’re talking article format. I dunno. I just give it a title and a byline, and type until I’m bored.

          1. DenverJ

            May I submit my 20 page treastie on why the Easter Islanders died from the ultimate broken windows fallacy?

          2. trshmnstr

            I submitted an article based on a 40 page research paper I wrote on public education, so probably.

          3. DenverJ

            Fuck, now i have to actually write the damned thing or you all will know I’m bullshitting.

        2. Gilmore

          No, thank you for mentioning monocle regardless – i’ve got it installed now and hopefully SF’d linkage will be avoided

          as for formatting submissions…. Jesse seems to be helping on that point below.

      2. jesse.in.mb

        We aren’t that sophisticated. Try to keep it to the AP formatting rules you remember. Cite your sources with links using the _blank target tag and use the current version of html tags em instead of i and strong instead of b, etc. If it doesn’t translate over someone will put some polish on it. Try not to get us or yourself sued. No guarantees that submitted work will be used; submissions must pass a three headed libertarian woman for recognition.

        1. DenverJ

          Bullshit. There are no libertarian women.

          1. jesse.in.mb

            Believe what you like, J. I have seen the mysteries of the Glibertarian inner circle and it is surprisingly cis-women heavy.

          2. Heroic Mulatto

            jesse counts as a sassy black woman, as well.

          3. Heroic Mulatto

            Further evidence that Loki the Trickster is the one true god is that woman eventually became an Alex Jones devotee.

          4. jesse.in.mb

            That’s ridiculous and offensive!

            That said, my three snaps in a z is on point.

          5. Heroic Mulatto

            What’s “ridiculous and offensive” is that you still haven’t shared with the rest of the commentariat the video of you at the last West Coast HnR meet up.

          6. jesse.in.mb

            DAMN IT. You can’t just link me to It’s Raining Men. Now I’m stuck in a homoanthem disco loop.

        2. Gilmore

          “”Try to keep it to the AP formatting rules you remember. Cite your sources with links using the _blank target tag””

          i never knew AP formatting rules. if i did, it was the late 90s, and i needed the money.

          the times i wrote things for external publications were almost always “send us an email and we’ll handle the formatting”; other institutions i worked for all had publishing systems which were extremely hinky MS-word-macro-nightmares. (banks)

          I figure i’ll just write in crayon and tape some pictures on it, and stuff it in the “SUBMIT” hole and see what happens.

          1. jesse.in.mb

            Should be fine. Just try to make it clear how you want it to be laid out and the ladyfolk will do the heavy lifting for 78c on the dollar.

      3. Pan Zagloba

        A dick pic for every 1000 words, I believe.

        1. *tackles Panny Z*

          Hiya, my brother! I need your help my and Dr. ZG’s Home & School for Wayward Ukrainian Waifs…

          1. Pan Zagloba

            Newsletter, subscribe etc…

          2. When there’s a, “with,” there’s a way (to an edit button).

          3. DenverJ

            Edit buttons allow dishonest fucks to be dishonest fucks. We all understand typos and autospell mistakes.

          4. Mike Schmidt

            Understand them and mock them mercilessly, you forgot to add.

        2. jesse.in.mb

          That’s ridiculous. My affections can’t be bought with dick pics!

          1. Pan Zagloba

            But they can be rented with said currency, yes? Or at least favors curried?

          2. Nope. Dr. ZG has a treasure trove of urology fotos and slides, and….no dice. He is a hard man to break.

          3. jesse.in.mb

            I’m taking stock of this and I probably can be bought with dick pics, Although all of the commenters noodz I’ve seen have been above average. I make no promises for uggos.

          4. DenverJ

            Liar

      4. DEG

        Someone linked to this, which I’ve been going by. Just use em for italics.

      5. __Warren__

        One word per Word doc. Send them a 1000 docs if you need to.

    2. Pat

      I doubt I’ll ever submit anything, but is ODF acceptable for those of us who don’t have access to MS Office? (Office can read ODF plenty adequately for most text tasks).

      1. jesse.in.mb

        Probably, but why? Anything that writes ODF can save as doc with negligible formatting issues. Why not save in a format nearly guaranteed to be openable by even the less tech savvy person who might receive it instead of foisting the added labor on the receiver?

        1. Pat

          Because I already have LibreOffice setup to default to ODF 1.2 strict and I’m a lazy cunt.

          Most of my office documents are only for personal consumption, so I rarely ever export to MS formats anymore. Fuck vendor lock in. But you’re right, it’s just as easy to export to OOXML at the origin end as to import from ODF at the other end. I think MS Office can open ODF seamlessly now though, so it shouldn’t be a huge hassle. It’ll nag you to save any changes in OOXML though.

          1. jesse.in.mb

            This conversation is triggering.

            Back right when whichever version of office introduced docx came out, one of the big bosses kept sending documents to the staff and nobody could open it. I asked him to please change his default to the older .doc format and he emailed back saying that he’d read older systems could just install an extra bit of software to be able to read the documents and I should just install that on EVERY computer instead.

            I was unaware that word had a native ODF reader. I use LibreOffice at work (and notepad at home), but have everything set to the older compatible .doc file just to avoid headaches.

          2. Pat

            My dad had a small home office when the changeover happened. It completely broke his brain. He never saved any two documents in the same format after that.

            Office 2013+ I think can open up to ODF 1.2 strict, but it might be only up to ODF 1.1. For text it doesn’t make much of a difference, most of the extensions in 1.2 are related to spreadsheets (which OSS still can’t match Microsoft on, sadly; fortunately my spreadsheet needs are very basic).

            Btw, I choose to pronounce the name of this site in the GNU convention, like “GUH-libertarians”.

    3. Word doc? What about people who use Linux?

  23. chemjeff

    Hello.
    Thank you for letting me register. I hope I am welcome here. If not then I will leave if you want.
    And thanks for this website.

    1. Swiss Servator

      “Welcome’s got nuthin to do with it”

  24. Heroic Mulatto

    If you need to explain glibertarians.com to someone:

    1. chemjeff

      So a Libertarian, a Japanese Sexbot, and a German Porn Producer walk into a bar…

      1. DenverJ

        I’ll be in my bunk?

    2. DEG

      Hopefully Agile Cyborg wanders on over here. Connecting to people through Agile Cyborg transcends mere words and pictures.

    3. DenverJ

      So, you all are going for an actual website, not just a “disaffected Reason commentariat” thing?
      Wonderful! Great! Excellent!
      You need to set up donations STAT.
      Again, great job!

    4. Gilmore

      I’m pretty sure this qualifies as my own version of ‘fetish porn

      *the origin of my pic

  25. Pat

    Hello. I decided to create an account here. Formerly Pat (PM) from Reason. I’m sure you’re all delighted to see me and have missed me terribly lo these many days.

    I killed my Reason account yesterday just in case I’m ever feeling stupid enough to log back in again. Since I couldn’t find a “delete my account” option I just changed the login to a random guerrillamail address and random password that I didn’t write down. I kinda hate the idea of fragmenting into little splinter groups like this, but since I’m done with Reason I’m still going to need my occasional fix of pedantic arguing and name calling over inane libertarian esoterica.

    1. DenverJ

      Yay! Libertarians rock!

      1. Mike Schmidt

        I do rock. But none of the rest of you people are real libertarians. *sniff*

        1. DenverJ

          Ha, real Libertarians snort, not sniff! You’re just a … Damnit whats that word… Cosmotarian!

    2. The Fusionist

      Here comes Pat!

    3. F. Stupidity Jr.

      I would have had my answer if I’d just scrolled further upward.

      1. Pat

        Busted.

  26. Swiss Servator

    Anything can be published….if the envelope of CHF is fat enough….

  27. Gilmore

    Keeping with HM’s point about “fetish porn”…

    …I think i’ve always secretly wanted this man to be my father. hence the profile pic.

    fun factoid = Jaco Pastorious’ first gig was as that guy’s bass player.

    1. The Fusionist

      “We took the distilled essence of the 1970s, gave it a wig and hair…and BEHOLD!”

      1. The Fusionist

        A *cape* and hair.

      2. Gilmore

        He predated the 70s. I think that was his one original hit. Or maybe there were 1 or 2 more.

        He obviously bit some chops from James Brown and Jackie Wilson and Otis Redding and Wilson Pickett. But so did everyone. He just did it… gratuitously.

    2. Heroic Mulatto

      With soul like that, are you sure he isn’t? I mean he must have impregnated women just by walking past them.

      1. Gilmore

        i’d love to think so. sadly, people get their hair-genes from the mothers’ side.

    3. Gilmore

      re: Jaco w/ Wayne Cochran

      he was 20 years old in that recording. which he wrote (for the entire band). he already sounded like he was way ahead of everyone around him.

    4. SIV

      Wayne Cochran wrote one of the best early-60s death-rock songs, Last Kiss. You can youtube up one or more of his own recordings but here’s the hit, a cover by J. Frank Wilson & the Cavaliers

      1. SIV

        If you’re not familiar with “first-wave” death rock Jody Reynolds was the king.

        1. Mike Schmidt

          I’ve never heard the term, but I assume Leader of the Pack is another?

  28. Pat

    How exactly am I supposed to keep track of properly threaded comments? Literally can’t even right now.

    1. Mike Schmidt

      A thing called Greasemonkey and another thing called Monocle. Where is trshmnstr…?

      1. Pat

        I was just being a smartass. I actually find this layout a lot easier to navigate with numbered posts and threaded replies.

        1. Mike Schmidt

          Well then thank goodness I didn’t waste my time giving you a helpful answer with links and such.

        2. F. Stupidity Jr.

          Pat (PM), is it?

      2. DenverJ

        Duh where do you think he is?

        1. DenverJ

          That was me using [em] instead of [i]. Fascinating. I used two extra characters to get the exact same result!
          I keed I keed.
          Seriously, this site is awesome, and you all should be very proud.

          1. Mike Schmidt

            If you think that was work, try doing a bold.

        2. Mike Schmidt

          You’ve been watching too much Futurama. But I like that in a robot.

          1. DenverJ

            Oh yeah, jerkface? I haven’t been watching enough Futurama!
            No, seriously, you’re alright.

  29. Gilmore

    I’m cashing in early for the evening. Before i go i want to recommend again something i mentioned a while ago =

    “A Pervert’s Guide To Ideology”

    A movie about a crazy slovenian marxist psychoanalytical philosopher rambing about schlocky movies.

    Its not the best description, but… well there you go. Its not for everyone, but it has its moments, and for all the batshit marxist psychoanalytical nuttery… he has a point most of the time. The fact that he has a terrible lisp and keeps touching his own face just adds to it being funnier.

    1. Gilmore

      Oh, and the film that he starts off with is “THEY LIVE”.

      And he covers everything ranging from “Titanic” to “West Side Story” to “The Dark Knight”… and on and on.

    2. Mike Schmidt

      They Live is “one of the forgotten masterpieces of the Hollywood left”

      I never thought I’d hear anyone use “masterpiece” to describe a movie starring Rowdy Roddy Piper. Woooo!

      1. __Warren__

        The late Rowdy Roddy Piper.

        1. Mike Schmidt

          Yes, all kidding aside, he died far too young.

  30. __Warren__

    Krav MAGA!

    1. Mike Schmidt

      Thanks for that sloopy.

      Here’s a great scene with our very own, Goovus Maximus!

      1. And one for OMWC, Eddie and HM…

        https://youtu.be/TCCssEas6LE

        1. I highly suggest turning on the Closed Captioning for these, it’s really entertaining.

          1. Mike Schmidt

            how do you measure yourself with the coffers I hide?

  31. DenverJ

    Also, guys, in another life I did search engine optimization. If you want some outdated help in SEO, I can help.

    1. __Warren__

      We have to own the results at Alta-Vista!

      1. DenverJ

        Outdated does not mean useless. It means “eh, its free and good enough until we have cash for good results”

        1. DenverJ

          And, I could do most of it without their blessing. But I wouldn’t, because respect.
          Most of my xp re seo is from local SEO and for that I’d need access to email accounts, a physical adress, etc. For this stuff, not so much.
          But I’m not going to do it without approval from those who own the site

          1. Mike Schmidt

            You just made all that shit up, didn’t you?

          2. DenverJ

            For instance: the website is registered at an address in the 92821 area code. I’m actually not bad at that type of work, and I’ve got a spreadsheet of places b to register the site at. Gimme permission, and I’ll see if i can’t increase your page ranking.

          3. DenverJ

            Area code, zip code: it’s all the same

          4. Old Man With Candy

            You do understand that this is what SP does for a living?

            Appreciate the offer. Seriously. Everyone is being super generous and sincerely trying to help. But she’s got that stuff nailed, and she’s the best there is at that kind of thing.

      2. LYCOS OR BUST!!!!!

  32. The Fusionist

    So is the site functioning again? That was some overhaul!

    1. Old Man With Candy

      Still not 100% there, but close. And she DID warn y’all.

      SP pulled an all nighter- someone ought to get her flowers.

      1. The Fusionist

        This site *did* grow fairly quickly, and by grow I mean was built by you and your better half.

        1. Old Man With Candy

          Her. 100% her. I claim no credit other than she wanted to make my friends and me happy because of my extreme charm.

          The migration is not a simple thing and had to happen sooner than we thought we’d need it (high class problem). She explained to me what was going on and what was involved and I understood about 5% of it. But apparently there’s some code that has to be fixed so avatars all come back and links to http (as opposed to https) something something something SSL acronym acronym acronym. Everyone will bitch because she finally fell asleep at 5:30 am before doing that long and tedious task.

  33. Rufus the Monocled

    Almost 500 comments. Geez, you guys aren’t fucking around anymore.

    1. l0b0t

      Huzzah for Roosevelt Franklin, one of many disregarded Muppets from a better time.

      1. Rufus the Monocled

        He’s a rebel. Notice his left-arm. He was told to keep his arms close to his body but not Roosevelt.

        1. l0b0t

          His friend Abecito, however, was a actual no-foolin’ Communist.

          https://youtu.be/D4ZEc68-E9s

  34. Part time punching bag

    FYI: Hopefully I don’t sound ungrateful; this is quickly becoming my go-to site. After your server upgrade, it is almost unreadable on mobile chrome. Everything is jamming to the right side of the screen (especially replies) and avatars are overlapping screen names. If it helps, I’m using whatever version of Chrome is available for the Galaxy S7 with Android 6.1.

    1. Mr Lizard

      It’s actually working better for me than the old cocktail party site. Although my first comment went into moderation

    2. Old Man With Candy

      That’ll work itself out. The server migration is still a work-in-process, hopefully finished later today. SP is super sensitive to how things work on mobile.

  35. Everybody take a deep breath and relax. Today might get a little buggy but that’s just because our tireless IT queen got … tired. She isn’t a damn machine.

    1. Mr Lizard

      However your mother never seemed to slow down….

      BTW good morning mammals!

    2. Suthenboy

      No pressure on her. Everything is working beautifully for me…I think. Looks good anyway.

    3. egould310

      Hey everybody! Just found out about this place. Looks nice. Feels pretty good. Think I may try to stick around for awhile.

      1. Check your text messages!!!

  36. l0b0t

    Thank you very, very much SP, your Herculean efforts are most appreciated.

  37. Mr Lizard

    Wow this site is working better on dolphin than 90% of the rest of the Internet, and I have a primitive mobile device (even by mammal standards)

    1. Suthenboy

      I thought you were out on the back porch? Didn’t I just see you out there?

      *I put out bait for bees and the flies gathered around it. There are a dozen or so green anoles gathered around waiting for the flies to light. Their bellies are so full they can hardly move. They dont bother running to hide when I approach.

  38. Suthenboy

    Good morning all.

    I missed this posting last night so while sipping my coffee I perused the comments and found this gem:

    “Frankly I had thought that at the time Roe was decided, there was concern about population growth and particularly growth in populations that we don’t want to have too many of.” – Ruth Bader Ginsberg

    That is just stunning. I had not heard that before.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      My understanding of that comment and her further discussion of it is that it was not an endorsement, merely an observation.

      1. Suthenboy

        Of course it is an observation of the sentiment of others, but were she on the court at the time how would she have voted?

        This is why, as a commenter once said, I value truth over politeness. I dont like cryptic statements, intrigue, hidden agendas, scheming and plotting etc. I like people to just come out and say what they mean. What she said was ‘At the time a lot of people wanted abortion to cut down on the black population’.

        I know she doesnt like Roe but only because she thinks it is legally questionable, she is definitely pro-abortion. Usually after one of them lets it slip out the rest of them run around pretending it never happened or explaining why they didn’t mean what they said.

  39. straffinrun

    I somehow managed to completely avoid knowing anything about the PewDiePie scandal until today. It’s awesome. Basically, I was able to get the Cliff’s Note’s version; Bland comedian puts out content on Youtube making fun of people who accuse him of being an anti Semite. People who are made fun of then cut PDP’s video into a million pieces and erect a Frankenstein straw man. Media refuses to admit they were wrong. I’m so happy I didn’t follow that whole shit show in real time because the digest version carries a better punch.

    1. Suthenboy

      I had never heard of the guy. It sounds like the usual proggie narrative to me. They so desperately need a racist cannibal hitler to do battle with because they define themselves by the enemy they fight. Without evil to vanquish their identity disappears so they keep looking under every rock and behind every tree to find it. They see monsters everywhere while the rest of us just see people. It really is sad.

      In the end they are no different from these people:

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mDdGUNiebU0

      Oh, wait. They are those people.

      1. Old Man With Candy

        Jesus H Christ on a Pogo Stick, I had a full post up about this a few days ago and none of you assholes noticed.

        /runs off and cries

        1. straffinrun

          I know I’m way behind. *Slips and falls on hamster wheel and spins around and around*

        2. Suthenboy

          I saw the post but it made no sense to me. PewPieDie is a nonsensical word to me so I just jumped to the comments.

          *I kind of made an effort to read about it but being completely unfamiliar with the story and the people but the narrative being a repetition of what we have seen over and over I just thought ‘oh, here we go again…’ and went to the comments.

          1. Old Man With Candy

            I attribute your ignorance of my post to antisemitism.

          2. Suthenboy

            Busted! Dammit!

      2. straffinrun

        It’s worse than the media falling for the usual fake racist hoax. This time they intentionally cut out context which suggests the exact opposite of what PDP is reported to believe. Basically it’s this: “The media will claim I’m a racist if I say, ‘I’m a racist. Not.’” Media responds with, “PDP admits he’s a racist.” It’s surreal.

        1. Suthenboy

          DT’s tongue lashing of the press a couple of days ago:

          DT – You people are dishonest and predictable. Tomorrow you will say I was ranting and raving.

          *next day – some bobble head proggie pundit on tv waving his arms and rolling his eyes while giving a spittle flecked rant*

          “Donald Trump was ranting and raving!!!”

          They really are the easiest people in the world to troll.

          1. straffinrun

            Luckily, there was a Pulitzer worthy piece by an elderly male with Werther’s that filled me in on the intricacies of the entire episode.

    2. Rhywun

      Apparently not bland enough for Disney’s taste. Oh well, what’s an internet sensation to do?

  40. Swiss Servator

    OK you overly active commenting animals – I just put up some Sunday Links. Now to church, to save my miserable soul.

    1. Mike Schmidt

      Sunday links?!

      *faints*