Trump Address Liveblog

Trump speech live blog with updates in the article from your intrepid Glibs “staff” and your reactions in the comments.

 

8:05: Β Much cheering from a little more than half of the crowd….

8:08: That hair is just ridiculous. (sloopy)

8:10: Starts off condemning hate speech, vandalism and evil. Β Not bad. (sloopy)

8:11: See? He wants to torch the world! (HM)

8:14: Campaign speech? Ugh. (sloopy)

8:18: Hair is looking’ good tonight, y’all! But where’s The Hat? I demand a close up! (SugarFree)

8:19: HOLY SHIT! This just became “Questions to the Prime Minister”! (HM)

8:19: Who could complain about the lobbying rules? Team Blue, I guess. (sloopy)

8:19: He’s really angling for that Union vote. Clinton shouldn’t have taken them for granted. (sloopy)

8:23: I had no idea I was living in a post-apocalyptic wasteland! (HM)

8:29: Doesn’t look like even the Dems that voted to confirm Gorsuch the last time can get off their hands. Β Hypocrisy? Or are they lamenting their rubber-stamping some years ago? (sloopy)

8:30 American juche is awesome! Maybe we can get 2 hot Asian chicks to smear VX nerve agent on Trump’s brother-in-law. (HM)

8:35: Two kids are diaper-less and the third has just walked in with an entire chocolate cake in her hands. Shit. (sloopy)

8:39: REPEAL AND REPLACE OBAMACARE with something closer to the free market. Β Yes, please! (sloopy)

8:43: “Across state lines.” Β About time that got corrected. (sloopy)

8:46: Jesus, fiscally liberal and socially conservative is the worst of both worlds! (HM)

8:48: Wait, so Team Blue likes the arduous FDA approval process that keeps drugs from market that could save lives? Β Seriously, what the fuck? (sloopy)

8:49: SCHOOL CHOICE!!!!! (sloopy)

8:50: *sigh* No one gives a shit about normal people, Donald. (HM)

8:53: What gets both Republicans and Democrats on their feet? Cop-fellating. (HM)

8:55: He’s gone 55 minutes without saying we need to bomb a specific nation off the face of the earth. Β Is that a record for a President? (sloopy)

8:56: Aaaaaaand as soon as I say that he talks about pissing a fortune away on military expenditures. (sloopy)

8:59: Amending HM’s comment from 8:53…and Soldier-fellating. Β (sloopy)

9:04: Somehow Chuck Shumer manages to look worse than normal, like a melted wax figure of himself. (SugarFree)

9:07: Holy shit. Trigger Warning, please. You can’t just flip over to Pelosi like that.

9:13: An entire presidential speech that didn’t ask for support in bombing another sovereign nation. Β That’s got to be a first so far as I can remember. (sloopy)

Comments

326 responses to “Trump Address Liveblog”

  1. Rufus the Monocled

    First!

  2. Hans Landa

    A group dressed in white? Racists.

    1. Before Memorial Day, no less.

      Shameless.

      1. another Kevin

        Paging Gilmore. Can we get a wardrobe review?

  3. Rufus the Monocled

    She’s a beaut, eh?

      1. Pomp

        A classic.

  4. Rufus the Monocled

    As the President speaks about a renewed American spirit, a Canadian owns half the comments here.

  5. ArchieBunker

    Why do they put this shit on every network, cant they just let networks bid for the sole right to show it like other sports leagues?

  6. Rufus the Monocled

    America first…but Canada second right?

    1. Just be happy you’re in there somewhere.

    2. Rhywun

      Sloppy seconds.

      1. Gustave Lytton

        Sloopy in Canada, eh?

    3. westernsloper

      I was going to post my go to Canada Day face book post on uncivils article today when he was talking about all the water flowing down the rivers in NY. I had to go do something unimportant and didn’t get around to it. I like to post every July 1, “Happy Canada day to my Canadian friends, and thank you for taking such good care of Americas, water, timber and oil. Have a great day!”

      (please take note of the lack of talking bad about Magnum PI there)

      1. Rufus the Monocled

        I noticed. /narrows gaze.

        1. westernsloper

          Nice. Throw down some Rodney King. I was visiting friends in
          Alberta some years ago and my buddy kept egging me on to tell everyone what I post on Canada day. I had enough beers in me to tell them. He later told me his 70 year old mother was suppressing so much anger it was all she had to not get up and kick me in the nuts. My friends all laugh at it, but she was pissed. Neighborly banter is all.

          1. John Titor

            Pull that shit in my old neighbourhood and you’d have received some fine Canadian hospitality from men of this calibre.

          2. Pomp

            I am disappoint. I was expecting that to be Scott Thompson.

          3. John Titor

            Yeah…the first openly gay guy I ever met was a two hundred pound Hell’s Angel named Craig. He was terrifying. Suffice to say, I found the “homosexuals are sissies” trope odd afterwards.

          4. westernsloper

            I have no doubt. The majority of guys I have worked with over the past ten years have been Canadian. Many maritimers, Albertans, a hand full of BC guys and the odd Saskatchewaner. Hell, my sister married one of you people. I have family up there. It is only meant in a friendly way riffing on the one common thing that binds Canada. That they are glad they are not Americans.

          5. John Titor

            Oh, yeah, I’m not actually pissed or anything. I’m just saying, make sure the company you keep will put up with that. Maritimers are the polite Canadians. Rural white trash Ontarians and Quebeckers? They’ll kick your shit in over some stupid bullshit.

          6. CZmacure

            s/guys/gays/g

          7. Pomp

            Say, in the past you’ve mentioned working in a lot of places abroad. Might if I ask what it is you do/did? Petroleum extraction industry?

          8. westernsloper

            @John I found the Maritimers to be the ones to go to fist to cuffs first. Never with me, but with others. Point taken. I didn’t think anyone who posted here would hunt me down over that.

            @Pomp It was oil and gas exploration work. Seismic. It all ended for me when the price of oil tanked. It was fun while it lasted. I met some great people over the years.

          9. Pomp

            @sloper – ah, so you were one of the guys setting up sensor probes and some kind of input stimulus for imaging then?

          10. John Titor

            I assumed oil work when you listed Maritimers, Prairie guys and BCers. Only place those all end up together is Fort McMurray.

          11. westernsloper

            Ya. Sensors and an energy source. Often explosives as an energy source. All good fun usually in ugly places. There is a bunch of oil in some not nice countries. When the price drops, the oil companies just pump what they have drilled and don’t look to expand. Makes sense.

          12. westernsloper

            I have never worked in Canada John. I met those guys elsewhere. But when I hand my passport to Canadian customs when I visit up there, I get a bunch of questions. They always think I am sneaking in to work.

          13. Pomp

            What’s the deal with the Maritimers? Is it due the heavy hydrocarbon footprint in St. John’s (i.e. Irving)?

          14. John Titor

            Ah, I see. Pity, I’ve heard stories about McMurray and wanted to ask about it.

            The Maritimes has had an unemployment problem for awhile, they’ve spread out for work elsewhere. A lot of them end up in the oil industry. It’s either that or sing sad folk songs about it.

          15. westernsloper

            Most of the maritimers I know are PEI. They just like to drink too much and fight. I didn’t get it, but I didn’t play hockey growing up. I just stick to drinking too much.

          16. Pomp

            Thanks guys.

    4. John Titor

      Only if Zoolander promises to lick Trump’s shoes at every meeting.

  7. Gilmore

    This is some kind of joke, right? No one is actually going to watch him talk. that doesn’t make any sense. Can’t we just wait for the outrage-headlines to follow? there’s got to be something better on. Like a TBS titty-movie from the ’80s

  8. IntraveneousWoodChipper

    Hard not to imagine the sickening media triumphalism that would be spewing out right now if the Hilldabeast was giving this speech in the Orange Sauron’s place.

    “One small speech for a Womyn, one giant leap for Womynkind” etc.

    Gag.

  9. Rufus the Monocled

    Politifact is hard at work at the moment.

    1. Yeah, I heard they just got a truckload of sit-n-spins delivered today.

    2. Rhywun

      “No, the sky is NOT blue. FALSE”

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        Holy sh….

      2. A Serious Man

        Pence looks like the President of the United States in a Marvel movie. I always think he’s about to sign legislation outlawing the X-Men.

        1. IntraveneousWoodChipper

          Somebody ought to! Think of the children!

        2. John Titor

          We can’t let Assault Mutants near our schools!

        3. I don’t want to live in a world where mutants come before the Enhanced in the grievance conga line.

          1. Your a grate ‘murican.

  10. Hans Landa

    Trump: “…drain the swamp…”
    Audience: Hey wait, that’s us!

  11. ArchieBunker

    Escape from new york is on comet

    1. SugarFree

      Ayy! Number Onnee! You’re the Duke! You’re the Duke!

  12. SugarFree

    I don’t know about you commie fags, but I can feel America Getting Greater.

    1. Hyperion

      Only if der Sessionasaurus can save us from them dopeheads can Murika finally become great again.

  13. Rufus the Monocled

    Canada!

  14. I see wood chippers

    And up rise hundreds of people who don’t even know what steel is.

  15. A Serious Man

    WHOO PROTECTIONISM! USA! USA!

    1. Hyperion

      Did you change your hat? Are you trying to trick us?

  16. Hyperion

    Oh, for shit fuck’s sake. Are we really going there? Well, here goes!

  17. Francisco d’Anconia

    Safer! My hero

  18. A Serious Man

    I feel like at any given moment Trump will start reciting the lyrics to A Horse with No Name.

    1. Hyperion

      Wait… you guys are actually watching this?

    2. Gustave Lytton

      *Sealab explodes and credits roll*

  19. Francisco d’Anconia

    The Great Wall of Mexico

    1. Hans Landa

      If they’re paying for it, they should get the naming rights.

    2. Isn’t that on their Guatemalan border already?

      1. Floridaman

        No that would be the Meh Wall of Mexico.

        1. CZmacure

          I wasn’t sure if sloopy was kidding, so I googled.

          Mexico does not seem to have a border fence on their border with Guatemala.

          1. Well, I’ll be damned. I learned something.* I won’t repeat that thing about the wall again.

            *That the internet can be a bad source of information.

          2. Hyperion

            There’s currently not a wall, but it’s something the Mexican government are currently debating and apparently taking seriously. Something to keep an eye on.

  20. Rufus the Monocled

    GREAT WALL OF….what will it be called again?

  21. Francisco d’Anconia

    You’ll be able to see it from orbit

  22. Hyperion

    BTW, Sloop, I’m really diggin that avatar. You’re like the libertarian version of Jerry Springer, except that you were never the mayor of Cincy. And that can only be a good thing. Rock on, bro.

    1. Mayor of Cincinnati when I used to live there. A true hero.

      1. Hyperion

        It’s a small world after all.

    2. Rhywun

      He looks exactly like my German teacher from HS. Like, exactly. OK, it was 30 years ago but wow.

      1. DenverJ

        Hmm… You know what other German speaker was cloned?

        1. Agent Cooper

          The Blaupunkt GTB 8200 A?

        2. thrakkorzog

          Arnold Schwarzenegger?

        3. CZmacure

          The Lebensborn? Or am I confusing alt-history and real history again?

      2. My German teacher from HS was a sub-5-foot woman with extremely long hair.

  23. Rufus the Monocled

    Democrats are such losers.

  24. Francisco d’Anconia

    Be afraid America!

    1. You could have said the same every time a President opened his mouth since Coolidge left office.

      1. Francisco d’Anconia

        Who says I haven’t?

        1. Pomp

          OMG YOU MUST BE ANCIENT

        2. An observation, not an accusation.

  25. Francisco d’Anconia

    Defend the parts they agree with, anyway.

  26. A Serious Man

    The thing that strikes me the most about any Trump speech is how much he makes the America that exists in his head sound like a really shitty place to live.

    Violent crime and drug abuse is out of control! We don’t win any more!

    1. SugarFree

      It’s a place he wants to make great again. The idea that America is a shithole he’s going to clean up has been baked into his message all along.

      1. Every candidate* from the opposition party has painted America as a hellscape since forever. Why should he be any different?

        *He’s the perpetual candidate since he’s never been on the inside.

        1. SugarFree

          I’ve had enough of your fake news.

          1. Just don’t cat-ass me.

      2. Rhywun

        Well, to be fair, there are a lot of shitholes in America which present ample opportunities for him the reverse the decades of pain inflicted by Democrats.

        1. SugarFree

          And what will the south side of Chicago look like after four years of Trump? Exactly the same.

          1. Rhywun

            Don’t be a negative Nellie.

          2. RothbardsBitch1

            If he keeps his promise of sending National Guard troops in, it’ll probably look like Baghdad.

          3. RothbardsBitch1

            Although it might be just a smidge amusing to see a bunch of gangstas holding their guns sideways trying to shoot tanks.

            And god help Chicago if some LT that watched We Were Soldiers too many times decides to call in broken arrow.

    2. Francisco d’Anconia

      AND TERROR!

  27. He’s figured out how to use props in a speech.

  28. Francisco d’Anconia

    FREE TRADE!

    1. This.

      If you’re not for Free Trade, you’re not for the Free Market.

    2. Grumbletarian

      Free trade is great, as long as you follow the rules.

      :Drops 8-inch thick ‘Rules of Fair Trade’ book on the table:

  29. I see wood chippers

    Hahaha. Sanders applauding Trump.

    1. Hyperion

      Wut?

      1. Heroic Mulatto

        It was the punish American businesses trying to leave line.

        1. Hyperion

          Fascism we can all agree on. Yeah!

        2. Pomp

          It’s like the renunciation exit tax but a more betterer cash grab.

    2. Zero Sum Game

      He’s really old-school when it comes to etiquette. Not many like that anymore.

  30. Francisco d’Anconia

    ZERO SUM GAME!

    1. Zero Sum Game

      What? Where?

      1. Pomp

        Hey I like the cut of your jib pal-o.

  31. Hyperion

    I admit, I agree with Trump about the wall. But he’s building it on the wrong border! Keep America safe from the Zoolandians!

    1. Agreed. And what good is the Wall gonna be if he doesn’t form up a Night’s Watch at the same time?

      1. Rhywun

        “No, winter is NOT coming. FALSE”

        /fact-checker

    2. He needs to protect the real Americans from the Californitans.

  32. SugarFree

    OMG, Becky! Donnie mentioned us!! OMG! Do you think he’s going to ask me to the Winter Dance?!?

    Senator Rand Paul‏Verified account @RandPaul 10m10 minutes ago
    As @realDonaldTrump just said in #JointAddress, we have already taken taken action to help Kentucky coal miners.

    1. I see wood chippers

      Is Rand tweeting from the House floor? Or does he have a spine and stayed home?

      1. hayeksplosives

        My guess is he is there to show the pointed difference in clapping for the good stuff and sitting or staring stonily at the bad things. He does distinguish policy from policy by its own merits.

      2. SugarFree

        There are pics on his Twitter outside the Capitol, so he’s probably there.

        1. Maybe. I saw him there on the floor just before it started.

          1. SugarFree

            Was his hair majestic?

          2. By “majestic,” do you mean it looked like an alley cat had climbed on top of his head and fallen asleep? Then the answer is yes.

          3. bacon-magic

            Eh…Gilmore has him beat.

    2. Agent Cooper

      Pennsylvania coal miners … fuck off!

  33. Rufus the Monocled

    I wonder how much of that – the protectionism against American goods – is accurate.

  34. Francisco d’Anconia

    Donald Trump is an economic genius

  35. Hans Landa

    I’m starting to think the audience doesn’t know when to clap.

    1. Rufus the Monocled

      The Democrats don’t have that problem.

  36. Hans Landa

    Merit-based immigration: Hotties first.

    1. Count Potato

      It worked for the First Lady.

      1. hayeksplosives

        Oh snap!

      2. IntraveneousWoodChipper

        So sad that the phrase doesn’t refer to Michelle anymore. Imagine the excess calorie intake that her school lunch program halted! How many fat proles lives were saved by her expertise?

    2. Hyperion

      No muffin tops. Or Canadians. We need to get back to our roots.

      1. Stinky Wizzleteats

        Dirt poor English farmers in funny hats?

      2. Hans Landa

        Muscular Africans?

      3. Pomp

        Russian serfs?

      4. Cliche Bandit

        the IRISH?!?!?!

  37. Rufus the Monocled

    America copying Canada.

    I’m detecting a theme here.

    1. Hyperion

      Don’t even start. America leads! First, we do stoopid shite, and everyone else follows!

  38. hayeksplosives

    It’s much more tolerable if you only listen and not watch the gestures and facial expressions.

  39. Count Potato

    One trillion is an oddly even figure.

  40. Rufus the Monocled

    Can you fire American?

  41. Rufus the Monocled

    DROPS THE BOMB. REEEEPEEEEALLLLL!

    1. Hyperion

      Oh God, please tell me we’re talking about that abomination called the ACA? Nuke it from fucking space.

      1. Rufus the Monocled

        Yes. He’s really hammering its failures.

        1. Hyperion

          It’s failures? It IS a failure.

  42. Rufus the Monocled

    Obama must be choking on his cigarette about now.

  43. I see wood chippers

    We’re all socialists now. /trump

    1. hayeksplosives

      I did cringe when he said something about needing to spark the engine of the economy…

  44. Francisco d’Anconia

    So, not health insurance, but welfare.

    1. Rufus the Monocled

      I’m not sure how he’s going to do all these things.

      1. Francisco d’Anconia

        Run deficits?

  45. Trump’s going to eliminate the FDA?

    1. Hyperion

      It’s a start. But to look sane, we should start with the DEA.

    2. hayeksplosives

      How about getting rid of the requirement to “prove” your new clinic or hospital is required in the place you’d like to open it? That crap is just obvious protectionism.

      1. Count Potato

        +1

  46. Count Potato

    How about the freedom to purchase drugs? That would lower the cost.

    1. Hyperion

      The drugs that we choose to buy? Where’s the cronyism in that? Did you doctor say it’s right for you? Fuck the American medical industry and may it rot in hell for eternity.

  47. “Why not join forces…” Points to both sides of Congress. “…and get the job done?”

    That won’t work. It’s got too much government.

  48. Paid Family Leave. Huh. Who is going to pay for that?

    1. hayeksplosives

      Ivanka?

      1. westernsloper

        She better. It was her idiotic idea.

    2. Francisco d’Anconia

      Mexicans

      1. Hyperion

        With ass sex?

        1. Francisco d’Anconia

          Selling pot

    3. I see wood chippers

      Megan better be a fucking lead in to eliminating the FDA.

      1. I see wood chippers

        /misthreading

    4. IntraveneousWoodChipper

      Also: why? Capitalism is a two-way street: competitive companies get the best candidates because they offer things like that. Not the government’s role at all. Feckin’ ey.

  49. DOOMco

    not paying attention.

  50. waffles

    Health insurance across states!!! Wooo! Everything else, meh. Well, except obligatory MUH ROADZ!!!

  51. Hans Landa

    So, who’s getting fired?

    1. Obamacare: You’re Fired.

      We’ll hire you back as a fee-based consultant, though.

  52. Today is Rare Disease Day.

    1. hayeksplosives

      Hey, we aren’t defined by our affliction with Libertarianism, we prefer Persons with Liberty.

      (or at least by visions of Liberty someday)

      1. So…Diseases that are Rare Day?

        Day of the Uncommon Unhealths?

        1. hayeksplosives

          Day of uncommon clarity of vision. So uncommon we can’t get a reasonable (Drink or no Drink??) candidate to win any level of office.

    2. Gilmore

      cavalier973 on February 28, 2017, 9:46 PM

      Today is Rare Disease Day.

      LIES!!
      Today is National Tooth Fairy Day

      ALL HAIL OUR NATIONAL TOOTH FAIRY

      1. So, millions of kids across America will knock out their teeth tonight?

        1. Gilmore

          The National Tooth will be treated to a great show-tune medley.

          1. Agent Cooper

            That’s a bingo.

  53. Hans Landa

    Any child going to public school is disadvantaged.

  54. Education is the Civil Rights Issue of our time.

    Civil Rights is the Education Issue of our time.

    Civil Education is the Education Time of our Rights.

    1. hayeksplosives

      I wish I could find Michael Medved’s compilation of Obama’s many speeches where he said “That’s what America is all about.” It is hilarious how much he said that about topics ranging from trivial to profound, but in the end, every time he said it diminished the other times he said it. It’s just a friggin’ cliche.

    2. Count Potato

      Don’t forget civil engineering that infrastructure on time. (Which won’t happen.)

  55. A Master’s Degree in Social Work won’t break the cycle of poverty.

    1. hayeksplosives

      In social work, aren’t you rewarded by the higher number of poverty stricken families you “help”? Not exactly an incentive to reduce poverty.

  56. Rufus the Monocled

    Trump is such a racist.

    1. Count Potato

      Well, he’s a life-long Democrat.

  57. I see wood chippers

    I wish he’d go off script more. It’d be hilarious.

  58. Victims
    Of
    Immigration
    Crime
    Engagement

    *Gasps from the Crowd*

  59. SLAIN PILLARS, I SAY!

  60. Count Potato

    I guess military officers don’t clap?

    1. Heroic Mulatto

      It could be a prohibition of expressing political views thing.

      1. Francisco d’Anconia

        this

      2. hayeksplosives

        I don’t know if it’s a strict requirement, but it is accepted decorum.

      3. Don’t they always clap when a pol addresses them at their graduation from the academies? They’re commissioned when they do that.

  61. Ending Sequestration.

    What does it mean?

    1. SugarFree

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_budget_sequestration_in_2013

      I think because it cut too much money from the military budget.

  62. Francisco d’Anconia

    Greeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaat!

  63. Pan Zagloba

    God help you all, you poor fucks πŸ™
    And us up here, when PM Zoolander decides he’s gonna show Trump how it’s done…

    1. John Titor

      It’ll be like the shittiest Odd Couple ever, but they’ll burn down the apartment building just to fuck with each other.

  64. Those who fight for America in uniform are the bravest of us all.

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      The Olympic Hockey team?

      1. hayeksplosives

        + All the points.

  65. Did Pres. Obama single out people for recognition?

    1. Hans Landa

      Himself.

      1. Count Potato

        Always.

      2. Okay, that got a chuckle.

    2. hayeksplosives

      Yes he did. And was far more offensive about it.

      The Dems are hating that Trump is playing their game and winning.

    3. Only the ones “that looked like they could have been his son.”

      And some others too.

  66. hayeksplosives

    I really am not fond of this segment where they trot out all these private citizens to score political points.

    Maybe it helps them (the invitees), but it sure smacks of exploitation.

    1. I’d have trotted out Preet Bharara and told everyone on national TV what a shithead he is.

      1. Agent Cooper

        But wait, wasn’t he on “our side” for a case?

  67. Francisco d’Anconia

    Hows bout helping them by getting them out of the shitholes the government’s put them in for the last 16 years?

    1. No shit. Also, its a volunteer military. Its not as if he was drafted an got caught up in something he didn’t sign up to be involved in.

      I hate this bipartisan part of American government.

  68. I see wood chippers

    Wouldn’t. Might. Would.

    1. Ryan might scowl at you from on high, dude.

      1. I see wood chippers

        I was talking about the joint chiefs.

        1. LOL!!!

          *Lucifer Our Lord

  69. Francisco d’Anconia

    CMoH

    Lucky bastard never has to pay taxes again.

    1. westernsloper

      Nobody does. Paying taxes is a choice. Living outside of prison is a choice too.

      1. Hyperion

        Those two things are mutually exclusive. I mean, they might be. For a time. *working on new type of radio button*

  70. “My job is not to represent the world, my job is to represent the U.S. of Freaking A.”

    Sounds like Trump read Mr. Gillespie’s article from the other day.

    1. Also, SECOND!!

      ON THE SECOND PAGE!!

      1. hayeksplosives

        Ooh! That’s a new one!

        What’s with the thread splitting though??

        1. What’s with the thread splitting though??

          I blame Trump, er, President Trump.

      2. Somebody ruined my sole claim to fame in this world.

  71. hayeksplosives

    Seriously?? Only 15 dems clapped for “My job is to represent the United States of America”?

    What’s so controversial about that statement?

    1. What about the refugees?

      1. hayeksplosives

        Come in legally (on your own dime), contribute, and assimilate, and now you are part of the US of A, even before you get citizenship.

  72. __Warren__

    There is no such thing as “Donald Trump” it’s four monkeys in a suit holding up a fake head that contains a much smaller money that is randomly operating the facial controls.

    The voice is computer generated and piped in through a speaker located in the nose.

    1. Limbaugh was quoting some guy today who asserted that we are nothing but a computer simulation, and the beings that are running it got bored sometime last year.

    2. Gilmore

      I find this the most compelling case so far for why Trump won

  73. Hyperion

    Look at this. MA is the best place to live in the USA, you dummies. This despite a climate that totally sucks ass and massive government that just cannot wait to violate your rights more.

    I would have thought it was worst after NJ. But EXPERTS know better:

    Masstopia

    1. __Warren__

      Wicked awesome!

      1. Hyperion

        WTF are you even going on about?

    2. Heroic Mulatto

      You’re just jealous you don’t live in the number one state for opportunity.

      1. Hyperion

        Yeah, that has to be it.

    3. NOT a Naked Intruder

      So, it seems that, for USNews, it’s government involvement that makes a state so wonderful.

      Maybe they have something in common with the Donald after all?

    4. Suthenboy

      Hmmm. Are people moving to or away from their top ranking states? It looks to me like adding Cuba to that list they would have to make it number 1.

  74. I heard boos. What did he say?

    1. Something about how this is a white nation and blacks should know their place. At least that’s what he said if you can read between the lines.
      -NYT editorial board

      1. I think the next eight years are going to be fun, after all.

        1. hayeksplosives

          Game over man, just game over.

          RIP, Bill.

    2. “You lie!”

  75. hayeksplosives

    He really needs to lay off twitter. He comes off much better in planned speeches.

  76. SugarFree

    Paul Ryan looks like he’s remembering that blowjob he got that one time.

    1. Hyperion

      Eddie Munster once got a BJ? From his sister?

  77. Francisco d’Anconia

    Well, I was expecting bullshit…

    …that didn’t disappoint.

  78. Gilmore

    Is it over yet?

    1. Its been over for 24 years or so.

      1. __Warren__

        Pokemon!

      2. Sweep the leg, Nancy. You got a problem with that?
        -Sensei Chuck Schumer

      3. Gilmore

        What happened 24 years ago? DONT MAKE ME DO MATH

        1. Heroic Mulatto

          Martin debuted on Fox.

          1. HM’s history is a bit darker than mine.

            RRRRRAAAAAAACCCIIIIISSSTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

          2. Pomp

            Thanks for the kick in the nuts before bed. I can take the death by 1000 cuts photos, but I think that put me over the edge.

          3. Here, have some music.

            It’s my “1980’s Songs YouTube Playlist”

            Strolling Through an Eighties Mall

          4. Gilmore

            “Our (potential) lord and savior, David Koresh was martyred?”

            (ponders)

            I was already convinced by the “its all downhill after Shanaenae” argument, but you make an interesting argument.

    2. Either three and a half or seven and a half years to go!

  79. Heroic Mulatto

    If the Democrats were smart, they would hammer the Commander-in-Chief for passing the buck on the SEAL’s death.

    But we all know the Democrats are a collection of microcephalic cretins.

    1. Hyperion

      Is that the type of cretin that they are? I wonder how it fits into my theory that both political parties are various forms of luddite?

    2. mikey

      HufPo is doing just that

  80. Juvenile Bluster

    Ron Paul‏Verified account @RonPaul 7m7 minutes ago

    Now the grades: His vision for the US at its 250th anniversary: A-
    His methods to achieve it? He gets: F.
    24 replies 117 retweets 205 likes

    Ron Paul‏Verified account @RonPaul 6m6 minutes ago

    Never said audit the fed. No spending cuts. More foreign intervention. Word “liberty” not mentioned once.
    29 replies 134 retweets 225 likes

    Ron Paul‏Verified account @RonPaul 5m5 minutes ago

    Final grade on libertarian scale: Plans/strategy: F
    Overall: D-

    His whole feed for the evening is… less than kind to our President.

    1. hayeksplosives

      What would he have said about Hillary?

      Man, I’m glad I didn’t have to hear the hypothetical Hillary speech. Sheesh. At least Don is kinda funny.

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        “What would he have said about Hillary? ”

        My guess is the same thing, without the good grade for her vision for the US in 2026.

        1. hayeksplosives

          Likely a pre-written response, like all the networks are now yapping. I have moved on to Comedy Central.

          Hildog would have had so much more about social justice and inequality though. And the Environment. and so on.

    2. Heroic Mulatto

      I refuse to believe that Ron Paul doesn’t farm out his Twitter feed. Dude’s posting dank memes mocking SJWs.

      1. Hyperion

        Ron’s like the coolest geezer of all time. We have to find a new word for it.

        1. DenverJ

          Goolest

      2. Gustave Lytton

        So not the same guy that did his newsletters?

  81. Hyperion

    I don’t even know that ya’ll goin on about. Ya’ll cra cra.

  82. l0b0t

    Happy Mardi Gras y’all! Thank you for providing such a wonderful place to congregate.

    1. hayeksplosives

      I’ve decided to give up my diet for Lent.

      1. Agent Cooper

        Just give up Lent for Lent.

    2. Back in Spring of ’96, I was in D.C. and started seeing all these people with gray stuff on their heads. I thought they were weird Hindus, or something.

    3. Brochettaward

      New Orleans is one of those dystopian hellholes Trump is going to clean-up.

      1. Wouldn’t it have been easier not to rebuild after Katrina?

      2. Suthenboy

        Katrina already cleaned it up.

  83. Hyperion

    I’ll just leave this here. I don’t know, because I didn’t watch it, and am not going to watch it. Please call me when we have a libertarian president, ok.

    But:

    Joint Address: On Fair Trade vs. Free Trade, President Trump Sounds Like a College Leftist.

    Trump has destroyed the GOP’s advantage on economics.

    /Robby Soave

    You know who else has been sounding like a college leftist?

    1. Francisco d’Anconia

      Hitler?

    2. Any colicky baby?

    3. Gilmore

      the GOP’s advantage on economics.

      Is this something they just invented to claim it had been “destroyed”?

    4. John Titor

      For some reason I question Soave’s insight on the matter of economics. I get the feeling his position is more ‘protectionism, ewwwwwwww’ then, say, based on any knowledge of trade policy. What was his degree? Other Site doesn’t list it.

      It’s Communications isn’t it.

      1. I thought it was journalism. Plus he went to TSUN, so he’s by definition retarded.

        1. John Titor

          I thought that whole argument with the feminist over the fake rape thing had a bit where she insulted him for not having a Journalism Degree? Or was it just a Journalism Degree from Columbia?

          Either way they’ve both wasted money on their “education”.

      2. Stinky Wizzleteats

        He got a BA in shallow thinking and graduated with honors.

      3. The way I (try) to explain trade is by allegory:

        Abe and Ben are walking through an orchard. An apple just happens to fall into Abe’s hand, and a pear just happens to fall into Ben’s hand. Since each prefers the fruit the other has, they trade, apple for pear.

        Now, explain which one is better off than before. Did one or the other take advantage of his trading partner?

        Suppose that they arrive at the supermarket, and find that a pear costs a dollar more than does an apple. Does Ben have a trade deficit or surplus with Abe?

  84. Brochettaward

    What amazes me, really, about all of the hand wringing over Trump is that over getting near two months he’s done basically nothing. His enemies continue to attack his policies done through fiat, which are minor, that most people are fine with or at least ambivalent too (shit on immigration). They’re making it look like he’s actually carrying out the agenda that got him elected when almost nothing has changed.

    I don’t know if anything demonstrates the arrogance of the Dems and the media than that.

    On another note, I’m trying to find things to be optimistic about with Trump. Outside vague promises to cut regulations and taxes, not much there.

    1. John Titor

      He seems to be malleable on issues outside of the ones he’s obsessed with, i.e. trade policy and immigration. Mattis seems to have convinced him to drop the torture idiocy pretty quickly.

      1. Brochettaward

        This would be fine with me if he were surrounded by people who were trying to mold him into something even vaguely libertarian rather than the Jeff Sessions’s of the world.

        I do think he could be an improvement foreign policy wise over the hapless Obama administration.

        1. John Titor

          Oh yeah, the company he keeps isn’t helpful, that’s just the only optimism I can find outside of what you mentioned.

          As I said when Sessions and police were blatantly lying to Trump about what civil asset forfeiture entails, you could probably get him to entirely flip his position on it if you explained to him what could happen if he was charged with a sexual assault. Or, as someone else pointed out, what would happen to his property if a drug dealer was selling in Trump Tower.

        2. Gilmore

          I do think he could be an improvement foreign policy wise over the hapless Obama administration

          I made a call a long time ago (before he won) that he might actually end up being one of the best foreign policy presidents since Reagan, at least in terms of establishing a better basis for realist relations between the major player-states.

          The EU is likely going to face a crisis in the next few years , and i suspect he will be in a good position to actually help guide them into a Phase 2 type situation – where NATO is reformed, and bi-lateral trade relations are actually strengthened with the people that matter…. and i also think he’ll help un-muddy the situation in Asia in ways that Obama et al were unable to do.

          this is mostly just wild speculation on my part, and it has as much to do simply with “Timing” and the right-conditions for change being present more than any particular virtues of Trump’s , or Tillerson’s…. but even where those things might matter, they tend to also be ‘better’.

          1. Pomp

            One of the more interesting things (for me) to watch will be the dynamic with the PRC. All the US predecessors seemed to be scared shitless of offending even the most minor of sensibilities of the giant babies in the CCP politboro. Contrast this with the dumb controversy related to when Trump accepted the call pre-inauguration from Taiwan’s duly elected President, from a guy that isn’t afraid of accidentally (or purposely) stepping on toes. The dynamic with China is something that I am very interested in watching.

          2. Gilmore

            Yep.

            Again – i think ultimately its going to be less about ‘Trump’ and more about timing. but little things like his taking the taiwan call? And talking about Japan needing Nukes? was a very clear signal that the old-patterns were being dumped, and it changes the way expectations are being set up.

            his bluster is really (imo) just the sort of shit a guy talks before he goes and stages some ‘big deal’. And china probably knows that what he wants to get out of them is the appearance of change. So they might engage in some kibuki drama where they make veiled threats, but then have some summit where he lets them save face and he pretends to be some great negotiator… but that the end result of all the bullshit will actually be something more like “genuinely open relations” where we are more direct with China without provoking them, and where we actually discuss the future balance of power in the region in

            basically, i think he will make it look like there’s ‘conflict’ when its just setting the stage for ‘better and clearer negotiations’. To use the sort of bullshit “sales” language Trump understands… You never make progress in a deal unless each party has had the opportunity to say ‘no’ a few times. There needs to be push and pull so that each side can learn where the other is flexible.

            Obama et al were far too scared of making waves, and instead kept smiling and lying to their faces and asking them for PR favors (see “green” summit)… while simultaneously talking to them like children over the South China Sea, etc.. and on and on.

        3. westernsloper

          I wonder if the loudest voice in Trumps ear is not Bannon. I don’t think he thinks on Sessions level of stupid. He has his own stupid. He has a desire to see the whole “natural order” of “establishment” come crashing down. He is a true believer in that, as well as the idiocy of protectionism. One some what libertarian, the other, not so much.

    2. Gilmore

      What amazes me, really, about all of the hand wringing over Trump is that over getting near two months he’s done basically nothing

      OMG LOOK AT THIS TRUMP FANATIC ITS LIKE HES A DENIALIST OF THE JOURNOLACAUST DOES HE NOT EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY THREATS AND DANGERS THEY FACE IN TRUMPS AMERICA

    3. Gilmore

      obviously i agree with you.

      even the stuff that he *has* done which signals trend/behaviors which we should otherwise find objectionable (e.g. the immigration EO etc.) they are actually things done by BOTH the last 2 previous administrations sans anyone screaming that the sky was falling.

      in short, there is nothing really especially different or new about Trump on the ‘bad’ front; he’s taken shitty ideas from both Bush + Obama and mixed them up in some populist way. and even those things are largely superficial, being EOs and nothing that has any lasting effect or can’t be rescinded.

      On the ‘good’ front, there is stuff that *is* sort of new-ish. The idea that he might wage sustained war against the regulatory state is… well, we’ll have to see where it goes. But – given the tenor among his cabinet picks – it seems more genuinely sincere than merely for show.

      1. Dick Morris asserts that Trump basically rescinded/destroyed the ACA by eliminating the requirement to procure health insurance.

        1. Gilmore

          Trump basically rescinded/destroyed the ACA

          I’m pretty sure all the insurers pulling out of exchanges were already destroying the thing. but whatever, they’re going to spin the narrative that Trump killed some wonderful thing that was *just getting on its feet* regardless.

  85. Gilmore

    Van Jones : Probably just running his mouth and having something to say simply for the sake of saying it, but basically gives Trump an A+ for his speech to congress

    Most of it is just commentator-gibberish, but he does say, “If Trump keeps doing this… he’s going to be there for 8 years”

    Which i think is more him talking to Democrats and saying, “if your strategy is ‘wait for him to fuck it all up‘… you need a new one”

    1. Agent Cooper

      Van Jones has been surprisingly cogent these past few weeks. Maybe he’s looked around CNN and said, “well shit, I guess I’ll act like the adult now.”

  86. Gilmore

    oOooOoh buttons on the bottom! an improvement

  87. Gustave Lytton

    What the heck? Reply button aligned left instead of right and bolded?

    I can’t handle change.

    1. SP

      Trying to make the overall UX better for tablet users, like, you know, me. πŸ˜‰

      I have really limited time away from paying clients to mess with this place for the cheap ass benevolent Founders, hence adjusting stuff on the fly in little bits of time here and there. Tightened up comment section length, comment alignment and padding, added a floating “back to top” button, decreased space between sections and headings, made the author credit box shorter, moved reply buttons to the left so it’s easier to determine to what one is replying exactly. All in an effort to reduce scrolling on an iPad.

      When I was blackmailed into volunteered to throw the site together, I had no idea you all were going to be going on and on and on and on in comments on Every.Single.Post. You’re an unruly bunch.

      1. one true athena

        Looks great! Thank you for the up to top button especially! with all the unruly commenters it turned out to be easier to just go to the front page again when on my phone, than try to scroll all the way up again.

        1. SP

          Glad you like it! Nice when something I do purely for my own benefit also helps others. πŸ˜‰

          1. PudPaisley

            Thanks for all the work you’ve done putting this site together. I’m mostly a lurker, but spend some time here almost every night reading the articles and comments. This whole endeavor is like when The Facts of Life spun off from Diff’rent Strokes, and your our Edna Garrett!

          2. SP

            Thanks, I think. (I’m not really a TV-watcher, so I’m hoping it’s a compliment. Otherwise, your account may mysteriously vanish any second now.)

          3. PudPaisley

            Just a friendly little joke! Facts of Life was a very popular spin-off show in the 80’s. I’m so happy to have this new site to visit. I was a 20 year loyal reader and follower of the other place, but this past year had pissed me off to no end, and the minute all my favorite commenters bolted, I did too.

          4. Old Man With Candy

            +1 Jail-bait Molly Ringwald.

          5. l0b0t

            OMWC, don’t forget her most excellent performance in my favorite 1980s 3D film – Spacehunter: Adventures In The Forbidden Zone.

      2. Gilmore

        Thank you

      3. Gustave Lytton

        SP, you and your efforts (along with the other Founders) are appreciated greatly. Don’t let my half-assed bitching mean anything. It’s like bad puns and snark. Now if the complaining stops…

      4. Agent Cooper

        Yeoman’s work, my friend.

        Now, can someone tell me what a Yeoman does?

  88. straffinrun

    I missed the super excellent speech about how nobody does something more something than the greatest troll that ever existed, but the comments brought me fully up to speed.

  89. Since I won’t be around for the Mourning Lynx:

    Customer Service

    Fuel company Z has apologised after a customer at one of its stations was doused in petrol after a fault with one of the pumps.

    […]

    Kapiti woman Ingrid Carson was filling up a petrol can for her lawnmower at the Paraparaumu service station, north of Wellington, on Tuesday afternoon when the incident happened.

    “I keyed in $10 on the pump and turned around to put the nozzle in the can, and all of a sudden I was being doused in petrol. It went all over my back and in my hair, so I jumped out of the way. There was a split in the top of the hose and petrol was spurting out of it at full pressure.”

    […]

    On Tuesday, Carson said after the spill she made her way inside the store, where staff gave her a serviette to clean herself up, before she was offered coffee and a muffin.

  90. Old Man With Candy

    And instead of watching the train wreck, SP and I did something sensible: I made subs, she made cocktails, and we enjoyed watching The Third Man on Netflix. Citizen Kane gets all the attention, but this is really one of Welles’s best.

    Our apologies for missing the fun here.

    1. Rufus the Monocled

      You missed a doozy. He promised to:
      1) Set up funding for the KKK
      2) End the NAACP
      3) Replace Hollywood with something bigger
      4) Took away every single rights for the LBGTTG community
      5) Stopped welfare and demanded everyone mail their EBT cards back
      6) Declared war on China,Russia AND Moldova ‘just because’
      7) Increased spending
      8) Grabbed Pelosi’s pussy

      1. Old Man With Candy

        When I last visited there, Moldova had, pound for pound, the most beautiful women in Europe and remarkably great food and drink. So I’m for the war there if I get to capture the enemy’s females and pillage the wine supplies.

  91. cyto

    Observations:

    The “my job is to represent the American People” moment could be a game changer, if the Republicans have a spine. There are like 10 team blue senators up in red states in 2018. Play the footage of the divide between Republicans and Democrats on whether the President of the United States represents the People of the United States or the People of the World in every campaign ad. Should be a shellacking.

    Won’t happen though. Because Trump is the first and so far only Republican on the national stage who has the cajones for that sort of confrontation.

    How the hell do you sit on your hands for that one? Are they seriously protesting the idea that the president represents the people of the nation? Idiots.

    Next – not much difference between Trump and a new deal democrat. I’m not sure what the Democrats are finding to hate. More spending. More pork opportunities on infrastructure projects. Immigration reform. ….. And they couldn’t find any common ground? Jeez.

    Finally – they seemed to have their talking points written before the speech started. Both Juan Williams and Van Jones trotted out the “Dark Vision of America” meme. Really? Saying we need to do something about the murder rate in Chicago and creating jobs is “dark?” What exactly would count as “not dark” in that world?

  92. cyto

    Oh, and the Democrat response:

    “HI! I am an old man from the south! I say things about church and God! I am calling for everyone to work together across party lines! Now, that being said, Republicans and Donald Trump hate people. They want children and old people to die. They really hate people.

    So remember, we are all pulling together as Americans, working together across party lines. Except with Republicans. Because they are hateful and evil. You shouldn’t work with those sorts. “