Monday Morning Links

Well, what a great weekend that was.  Did my first charity auction for the Calcutta for our spring Member-Member at our golf club. Got my pool painted and its filling with water as we speak.  Got most of my back yard cleaned up, including tearing down and replacing a lot of jacked up fencing, culling some trees that needed to be gone and ripping out some ivy that looked less than desirable. Plus The Masters!

Alas, its time to get back to work.  And part of that is supplying you with your daily dose of morning links.  So here’s Monday’s version.

The church bombed by ISIS in Egypt.

ISIS does what ISIS is gonna do. Which means they’re going to kill a bunch of innocent people that are minding their own business.

Juan Williams laments that blacks sometimes stray off the plantation.  Because there’s nothing worse than a black Republican, right Juan?  I mean, how dare they not vote completely in lockstep for the party that they’ve voted in lockstep for for more than five decades while slipping further into poverty as a group, while dropping farther behind educationally as a group and for seeing their families break apart at a much higher rate than other racial demographic groups since those Great Society programs aimed at helping them began in earnest.

Looks like the battle over sanctuary cities receiving federal grant money is heating up. The hypocrisy on both sides is not surprising.  But I really had no idea there were this many states-rights and local-rights Democrats out there.

Sergio Garcia; Masters champion.

John McCain says Trump admin partially to blame for Syrian gas attack.  Why?  Well, apparently saying who controls a country is up to their own people results in their leader gassing their own people.  At least in that thick skull of his.

Boy dominates girls’ sport.  Big surprise.

And finally…in what was quite possibly one of the greatest duels in Masters history, Sergio Garcia finally gets a major victory.  And it was absolutely stunning.  I’m sure I’m not the only one that thought he was dead when he hit it left of the fairway and had to take that unplayable lie on 13.  But he persisted.

Not only is he a Masters champion, he gets to marry this woman very soon.

Anyway those are my links.  And this is the real me.

Comments

343 responses to “Monday Morning Links”

  1. Just a thought not a sermon

    19) DC cop pays 15-year old for sex, then beats her up to get his money back.

    Classy guy! This line in the article caught my attention: “[the cop] had previously been with the D.C. Department of Corrections. He was sued by an inmate who alleged he beat him at the D.C. jail. The lawsuit was pending in federal court when Ekwonna applied and was accepted to the police force…”

    So that the man was being sued for beating prisoners up didn’t make a difference to the DC police. Just the kind of cop they’re looking for, I guess. I suppose the lesson here is that if you’re a psychopath with a penchant for underage prostitution and anger problems, you’ll never have a problem finding a job that caters to your tastes.

    1. Shut up, you racist shitlord.

    2. Negroni Please

      He didn’t beat her up. He robbed her at gunpoint.

      1. Just a thought not a sermon

        Thank you. Apparently my reading for comprehension skills are declining.

      2. Endless Mike

        He didn’t rob her – that was civil asset forfeiture. She was under suspicion for prostitution, and violating child labor laws.

        1. Jimbo

          Winner

    3. I assume he’s on paid administrative leave?

    4. KibbledKristen

      Just once, I would love to see one of my cop Facederp friends publicly, and without equivocation, denounce these fuckers. One of my cop Facederp friends is even a DC cop. Crickets.

    5. Nephilium

      What? It worked just fine in Grand Theft Auto.

      1. Max Coins

        Whoa, they were right about computer games being bad and all. Who knew?

  2. Is Bigfoot in Ohio? Search group hunting in Youngstown

    California-based Searching for Bigfoot Inc. traveled to Girard, a city in Trumbull County near Youngstown, after a man claimed he took a picture of a creature that looked a lot like the big guy.

    In fact, Xavier King told a Youngstown television station he saw Bigfoot twice while driving toward Youngstown.

    “I had seen something, I don’t know what it was, I had seen something that’s all I know,” he said. “I got out and took a picture.”

    King showed the pictures to a friend, who sent it along to T.J. Biscardi, director of operations for Searching for Bigfoot, and the hunt was on. Biscardi says he gets a number of reports of Bigfoot sightings from Ohio at this time of year because the creatures are migrating north.

    1. Just a thought not a sermon

      “Biscardi says he gets a number of reports of Bigfoot sightings from Ohio at this time of year because the creatures are migrating north.”

      So they head south for winter and return to the north for breeding?

      1. Is he confusing Bigfoot for Quebecers that got on I-75 instead of I-85 by accident because of that overpass fire?

        1. Bobarian LMD

          There is no bigfoot in Ohio, there is only WARTY!

          /By professional agreement

          1. ChipsnSalsa

            STEVE SMITH HAVE EASEMENT TO PASS THROUGH.

      2. IF BY “BREEDING” YOU MEAN “RAPE” STEVE SMITH AGREE.

    2. Count Potato

      STEVE SMITH LIKE TO POSE FOR PICTURE FIRST TO COMMEMORATE RAPE

      1. Lachowsky

        STEVE SMITH PHOTOGRAPHY INC. HAS SPECIAL COMMERATIVE RAPE PACKAGE ON SALE AT WANT BASEMENT PRICES

        1. Lachowsky

          Shit, autocorrect. let me try again.

          STEVE SMITH PHOTOGRAPHY INC. HAS SPECIAL COMMERATIVE RAPE PACKAGES ON SALE AT WARTY BASEMENT PRICES

    3. The Last American Hero

      I saw this one on the History Channel. Spoiler alert, it was just a UM co-ed doing the walk of shame back to Ann Arbor.

      1. egould310

        ^^^^^ Pay attention everbody. *This* is how you internet.

  3. Spain arrests Russian hacker over US elections

    An alleged Russian hacker has been detained in Barcelona at the request of American authorities, an arrest that set cybersecurity circles abuzz after a Russian broadcaster raised the possibility it was linked to the U.S. presidential election.

    A spokeswoman for Spain’s National Court said that the Pyotr Levashov was arrested in response to a U.S. computer crimes warrant. She spoke on condition of anonymity in line with court rules.

    The U.S. Embassy in Spain declined comment; the Russian Embassy did not immediately return messages.

    1. Count Potato

      That’s one bullshit headline.

    2. leonadasiv

      Just to remind everyone (not that you need it, but always good to have the reminder), the Russian hacking of the election consisted of document b revealing that Hillary Clinton’s campaign colluded with the DNC to shut out a post opponent. So when someone says Trump hacked our election, throw that in their face.

  4. Just a thought not a sermon

    From that Juan Williams article–

    “Without a drop of embarrassment he announced, “Oh, look at my African American over there. Look at him. Are you the greatest?” Yes, it has got to be tough to be a black Republican in the Trump era.”

    Liberals are humorless.

    1. straffinrun

      His son is a Republican bigwig, right?

      1. Gadfly

        Per Wikipedia, both of his sons have been involved in Republican politics, with the youngest one currently serving as the press secretary for Ben Carson. So, not a bigwig, but heavily involved on the Republican side of things.

    2. Drake

      Juan Williams is just the dumbest. He has no ability to separate political tactics from ideological principles. When he used to show up on Fox News his eyes would just glaze over when other folks debated ideas.

      1. leonadasiv

        To be fair, i don’t think most progs can tell the difference between political tactics and ideological principle.

      2. commodious spittoon

        I don’t know much about Williams from Fox, but I read his book Enough a long time ago. He came out swinging against black victimhood and low expectations racial politics. I remember it mostly for his defense of Cosby. He doesn’t seem like a progressive by any stretch.

        1. Count Potato

          He is also for school choice.

    3. They’re humorless scolds. Puritans would tell them to loosen up.

  5. Why Scientists Are Resuming the Search for Extinct Tasmanian Tiger

    In 1936, the last known thylacine, also known as the Tasmanian tiger, died in captivity in Hobart, Australia after. The last one in the wild was killed sometime between 1910 and 1920. Settlement in Australia and Tasmania pushed the animal to extinction; people feared the animal, inciting indiscriminate killing. In the early 1900s, the Tasmanian government paid people to kill the animals due to the tigers often killing domesticated sheep and livestock. The species was officially declared extinct in 1986.

    Recent reported sightings have provided enough incentive for scientists to conduct a search for the Tasmanian tigers. “We had two highly detailed reports from very experienced people. One was a National Parks ranger that I’ve known for decades and the other by a frequent camper who provided an exceptionally detailed description,” said Dr. William F. Laurance, Prince Bernhard Chair in International Nature Conservation at James Cook University in Australia, in an interview with the Observer.

    1. Just a thought not a sermon

      LH, did this turn up in your Bigfoot profile search results or what?

    2. Count Potato

      Didn’t the Pope condemn thylacines as being evil or some such, which lead to them being killed?

      1. thrakkorzog

        I think they were banned for causing birth defects. They’re still used to help chemo patients combat nausea in some cases.

  6. Count Potato

    “Queer Dance Party for Climate Justice at Ivanka Trump’s House!” asks more than it answers:

    1. Does “queer” mean gay or retarded?
    2. Why was in front of Ivanka Trump’s house, when no one was even home?
    3. WTF is “climate justice”?

    https://pjmedia.com/trending/2017/04/05/how-a-queer-dance-party-in-front-of-ivanka-trumps-house-made-a-wine-sipping-woman-an-internet-star/

    1. 1. Shut up shitlord.
      2. Shut up shitlord.
      3. Shut up shitlord.

      -prog logic

      1. leonadasiv

        Let’s not dignify that with the word logic.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Climate justice is the new social justice is the new Marxism.

    3. PieInTheSKy

      Climate justice means preventing poor countries from having cheap electricity I suppose

    4. BigT

      Climate justice.

    5. Justice is difficult to adequately define at the best of times, but it’s been so thoroughly abused by the progressive left that I think it’s basically just a suffix meaning “in line with progressive ideals of the moment”.

    6. commodious spittoon

      Pence’s house I can understand. Ivanka’s? What, are you stupid?

      1. zwak

        Yes.

      2. Count Potato

        Wait, you could understand a ““Queer Dance Party for Climate Justice at Mike Pence’s House” ???

        1. commodious spittoon

          I can understand the rationale behind choosing Pence’s house. Targeting Ivanka OTOH is dumb. Someone might think they’re being fatuous*.

          *they’re being fatuous.

          1. JaimeRoberto

            It’s a fine line between fatuous and fabulous.

  7. UnCivilServant

    Your intro reminded me of a pattern I’ve noticed.

    The Inertia applies to the general concept of work as much as to simple motion. Getting started on work (be it work work, hoursework, or some hobby project) is difficult, but once activity has begun, it will continue until some external force interrupts. Thus participating in the work day at the range led me to clear unwanted weeds from my sidewalk and to dig down to the pavement (turns out the exposed soil was actually years of accumulation on top of the concrete) and start sorting things out inside after that was done.

    Most weekends inertia leaves work undone.

    1. Max Coins

      A body at rest tends to stay at rest unless acted upon by some outside spouse.

      1. Badolph Hilter

        Ha!

  8. Early EV Buyers Win, But the Segment Stands to Die Without Tax Credits: Report

    Predictions generally carry as much weight as the listener cares to give, but the past is a good predictor of the future. Had former President Barack Obama’s 2011 prediction of 1 million electric vehicle sales in the U.S. by 2015 come to pass, he’d have had the opportunity to renew the credits while still in office. Of course, a million sales would disprove the need for incentives.

    Well, Obama’s prediction didn’t pan out. In 2017, EV sales have only covered half the ground towards that goal. And a market share of about 1 percent isn’t healthy — it’s a niche.

    According to the report, Tesla and Nissan are halfway through their finite pile of credits, while General Motors will probably run out next year or in 2019. Just as all three automakers are poised to see large increases in EV sales thanks to cheaper, longer-ranged models, the incentive to buy them is about to disappear.

    That puts the whole segment in a Catch-22, Edmunds states.

    1. UnCivilServant

      We have to subsidize cars people don’t want!

      Also, I highly recommend the “Grand Tour” segment on the electric car, if only for the recurring inquiries of people on the street about how they felt about their tax money helping to pay for a millionaire (James May) to own an electric car and the eventual drive to Cornwall.

      1. Private Chipperbot

        That was a very good episode!

    2. BigT

      Electric cars for the win!

      1. Bobarian LMD

        That’s something I miss… Friday morning penis noses.

        Needz moar labelz!!11!

    3. Wait, we have proof that people were buying electoral votes?

      How is this not news?

      *reads further*

      Oh…electric vehicles.

      That’s not nearly as interesting.

    4. EV’s are a poor solution to a problem that doesn’t exist.

      First, people don’t trust electric cars. Gas and diesel are simple, they’ve worked well for a century or so, they’re easy to refuel, and they’re pretty efficient. If you run out of gas, you can walk to a gas station, buy a gallon of gas in a jug, and carry it back–something you can’t do with a Tesla.

      Second, electric can’t beat the range of internal combustion. They’re short-range vehicles, for the most part, so even if you’ve got charging stations littered across the country you’re still stopping more often. Sure, if you stay within, say, 30 miles of your house most of the time then it’s very convenient to plug it in at the end of the day, but I would argue that this is a fairly small niche where relatively expensive electric cars are competing with scooters, public transportation, walking, and cheap regular cars.

      Third, electric cars suck at towing stuff, hauling loads, etc., where your average SUV excels. Here’s a link to an article about an Edmund’s tester checking out the Tesla X’s hauling capabilities, with distinctly lackluster results.

      So in buying an electric car, you’re accepting limited flexibility in exchange for what amounts to not-better-but-different performance in a niche set of use cases. Some people will do that just to virtue-signal, or because they think electric cars are neat, but that’s not much of a market base.

      1. TripodKat

        Not to mention charging the damn things takes somewhere between 30 minutes and 12 hours depending on the model. Can you imagine taking a Nissan Leaf for a multi-state drive and having to stop for 4 hours every 200 miles? All so you can burn some fossil fuel at a power plant rather than burning a different fossil fuel in your car?

      2. Michael

        You didn’t mention what is likely the biggest reason EVs are worthless, and that is climate itself. Batteries, no matter the technology, are notoriously prone to failure in extremely cold temperatures. I’m eager to see how they fare in the upper Midwest during winter over the long term (excluding any Teslas kept in heated garages, of course).

  9. Phallic Curiosity: How a Whale Penis Came to the Explorers Club

    In 1977, the Explorers Club in New York received an unusual gift. Unable to attend a whaling exhibition that the club was hosting, Mr. and Mrs. Frederick S. Schauffler sent their regrets in a note … along with a sperm whale foreskin, stuffed and mounted on an oak base.

    The penis stood out during a media tour of the club’s headquarters in New York City related to the Explorers Club’s 113th Annual Dinner in March. On the top floor, in a room called the Gallery, the cetacean phallus pointed skyward.

    1. Pope Jimbo

      Wouldn’t the whale penis “come in” the Explorers Club?

      1. straffinrun

        Exploree’s Club? I’m not joinin’ that.

      2. It was exploring its sexuality.

  10. What Americans think about U.S. strike on Syria

    Fifty-seven percent of Americans approve of the airstrike against Syrian military targets – calling immoral the Syrian regime’s use of chemical weapons that led to the strike – but most are leery of any military involvement beyond airstrikes, a CBS News poll shows.

    President Trump’s overall approval rating edged up, though most respondents voice unease about his approach to Syria going forward, and say Congress must authorize further actions there.

    Few Americans are willing to see the U.S. get involved in Syria beyond the use of airstrikes. Only 18 percent would want ground troops. Half of Republicans would limit involvement to either airstrikes or diplomacy, and Democrats largely would focus on diplomatic efforts.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Shorter America – We want to virtue-signal by bombing a runway but that’s about it.

      We’ve turned into Facebook Nation.

      1. straffinrun

        Trump should’ve just claimed one of the endless bombings going off there as his. Save money and time. It’s what ISIS does.

        1. Bobarian LMD

          He’d have ended up accidentally picking the next chemical strike. (If this one wasn’t a false flag, the next one surely will be)

          Imagine the pants-shitting.

      2. Negroni Please

        Not just virtue signalling it’s also jingoist sociopathy. No pile of foreign corpses is too high for virtue signalling, but let’s not shed any American blood in the process.

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder

          Look, if droning a brown person helps assuage our sense of collective guilt and makes us feel powerful in the process, then why shouldn’t we?

    2. Drake

      I still think the whole thing was just a test. How well does the Russian made aid-defense system intercept different cruise missiles at different altitudes, speeds, and evasion patterns? The damage to the targets was so minor it’s laughable.

      1. BigT

        According to reports, the targets were the Syrian infrastructure and planes. The runway and Russian equipment were intentionally not targeted. Sounds about right: destroy some Assad assets, send a signal to Assad and Kim, don’t stir the bear in the woods, and minimize actual deaths.

        1. Yeah, everybody kind of wins. The Russians get to laugh at the Americans missing all their planes, Assad gets a message but retains most of his assets, Trump proves that he’s not in Putin’s pocket and looks like a tough guy without actually sending troops.

  11. Count Potato

    “The student’s mother, Ngozi Nnaji, who was taking a shit when God was giving out names, said critics should stop focusing on her child’s biology while watching races or reading about the results.”

    OK, then lets focus on gender: that’s a man.

    1. Who are you to point out scientific facts to people? Don’t deny them their delusion-based successes just because of biology. Deny real females their legitimately-earned success instead. It’s the only right thing to do when a boy decides he’s a girl.

      1. Just a thought not a sermon

        Shouldn’t feminists be up in arms about this kind of shit?

        1. Some of them are.

          IIRC, there’s a real schism in feminist circles in whether to accept trans people as women or not. And it breaks down farther when you’re talking pre-op trannies. And pre-hormone-treatment trannies are nothing but dudes calling themselves chicks.*

          *as are post-hormone-treatment trannies but at least they’ve made a firm commitment to mutilating their bodies. Pre-hormone-treatment trannies haven’t done anything but start shopping in a different clothing department.

          1. Scruffy Nerfherder

            Who even says transvestite anymore?

          2. Transvestites don’t identify as the opposite gender, they just like to feel pretty.

          3. commodious spittoon

            And witty, and wise?

          4. thrakkorzog

            Listen to some Eddie Izzard or Dee Snider, being a transvestite doesn’t make someone any less of a man. it just makes them a man who made some odd fashion choices.

            It doesn’t mean they want someone to chop off the tackle and reel so they can headline Cabaret next week.

            Yeah it’s bizarre, but half of y’all are gonna spend a disproportionate amount of energy setting up fantasy sports league. I don’t get that either. Nobody is getting hurt, so fuck it, who am I to judge?

          5. I mean, French noblemen in the 18th century wore makeup, fake beauty marks, huge wigs, and high heels.

          6. commodious spittoon

            Stan: Where’s Steve? I want to see how my fantasy basketball team is doing.

            Francine : Well, he understood the fantasy part, but had no idea what basketball was. He tried to add three griffins and an orc to your roster.

            Stan: [Bleep]ing nerd.

          7. UnCivilServant

            Francine : Well, he understood the fantasy part, but had no idea what basketball was. He tried to add three griffins and an orc to your roster.

            Stan: [Bleep]ing nerd.

            That sounds less like a nerd and more like the mentally handicapped. A real nerd would read the ruleset of the game and not make a mistake like that (even if they had no interest in baseketball proper)

          8. thrakkorzog

            Naptown Bill gets it, those sissified French noblemen wearing makeup and wigs were actually kind of hardcore. If they slapped you, it meant a sabre duel at dawn, bring a second. They would fucking cut you up.

            The high heels and ostentatious clothing were both a sign of virility and wealth. Because they had huge dicks and lots of money, both of those were given to them by god.

          9. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

            One of these days I’ll get to writing up a summary of the economic case for dueling.

          10. PieInTheSKy

            I think them are those trans exclusionary radical feminists. If they are radical they must be bad at feminisming ….

        2. ChipsnSalsa

          I think is where the wires get crossed and they short circuit their brain. They want to defend a transgender whilst and at the same time defend “women are the same, but different (when needed)”.

      2. Count Potato

        Not to get all sciency, but f he honestly decided he was a girl, he wouldn’t have a mustache.

        1. Drake

          That picture is hilarious. It looks like a guy from my son’s high school football team put on a wig, didn’t shave his mustache, and started running with the girls’ team as a goof – and maybe in the hope he gets to shower with them.

          1. Chipwooder

            It looks like a picture of Richard Sherman, basically.

        2. Bobarian LMD

          My grandmother had a mustache… and one really wicked chin whisker.

    2. Pope Jimbo

      This whole fiasco is fun at the high school level, but I’m really waiting for the main show which is when these dud(es|ettes) start suing schools under Title IX.

      If everyone has to legally pretend that this person is a female, how can they not sue the pants off any school that offers a track scholarship to any of the girls that this person has trounced in high school?

      “I was state champion 4 years running and I got no scholarship offers, yet 43 of the people I crushed have received offers. Get your checkbooks out bitches.”

      Either colleges are going to have to face the wrath of SJW students and fight this in court, or they are going to have to red line entire states who have a guy running women’s track.

      1. Count Potato

        Unfortunately, I don’t think it’s a problem with a simple solution. Neither banning the transsexuals from sports entirely, putting transsexual athletes on the team of their birth sex, or allowing anyone who identifies compete as that gender, seem like good answers.

        1. commodious spittoon

          putting transsexual athletes on the team of their birth sex

          This seems like the most appropriate solution. You want to call yourself a woman and play dress up, that’s fine. You want to mutilate your body and undergo hormone therapy, well, more power to you. But there’s no undoing puberty.

          1. Number.6

            Start using ‘BAM’ and ‘BAF’ (Born as male/female). Done and done.

          2. robc

            You used done and done before me, now I look derivative.

          3. Number.6

            It’s OK. I appropriated it from a co-worker this morning.

          4. Count Potato

            That would still cause problems, especially in locker rooms.

          5. commodious spittoon

            That’s always going to be an issue, imo. And there’s nothing wrong with accommodating these people in their personal habits. But that stops being relevant when it comes to the competitive arena. It’s laughably obtuse to pretend that men who have developed male bodies stop being male because they reduce their blood serum testosterone and get their genitalia snipped off. I’m sure that has some detriment on performance, yet we’re meant to pretend they’re now on the same level as women. It’s absurd.

        2. robc

          Create three divisions:

          XX
          XY
          Other

          Done and done.

          Your chromosomes determine which division you compete in. Other would be a sparse division.

          1. Count Potato

            Except “other” would be unworkably sparse. Transsexuals make up such a tiny fraction of the population, no school would have enough players for team, etc.

          2. commodious spittoon

            It’s simple, really. Require schools to fully staff their alternative teams before male/female teams are allowed to play. It’s all there under Title IX.

          3. robc

            I guess they could be:

            Has a Y
            Doesnt have a Y

          4. The Last American Hero

            Not when you attach a scholarship worth $100k to it.

          5. Or just eliminate gender-specific divisions entirely. You can keep separate locker rooms, just have men and women playing in the same sports, on the same teams, etc.

          6. Count Potato

            That would eliminate almost all opportunities for female athletes.

          7. The Last American Hero

            Feature, not a bug?

          8. wdalasio

            So what?

            Seriously, why should there be specifically allocated slots for female athletes when they aren’t the best available players? For years now, feminists have been assuring us that anything men could do, women could do equally well. Well, buttercup, then its time to stop giving you “a league of your own”. Can’t hack it? Sorry, but that’s on you, now.

            I didn’t want this fiasco. I knew it was going to end in tears. But, I was dismissed as a cis-hetero agent of the patriarchy. Well, progressives, welcome to the world you wanted.

          9. R C Dean

            You can keep separate locker rooms,

            Nope.

            Remember how all this started?

          10. The simplest solution is to offer sports to everybody based on their biological sex and to make all participants subject to PED testing to ensure they are playing fair. And while I have no problem with a person transitioning into something they weren’t born as and receiving the same opportunities for normal curriculum, they aren’t necessarily entitled to special treatment when it comes to extra-curricular activities. Sorry, you manipulate your body or identify in a way that gives you a demonstrable advantage vs what your body was pre-transition, you lose the ability to compete against others that haven’t.

  12. NYT Accuses Free Beacon of Defaming ‘Doggie Hamlet’

    The New York Times is defending a taxpayer-funded production of “Doggie Hamlet,” claiming the Washington Free Beacon missed the point that the outdoor sheepherding dance performance was really about “what it means to be a citizen of the world.”

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Obviously “being a citizen of the world” means helping to underwrite doggie theater.

    2. Ay, in the catalogue ye go for men,
      As hounds and greyhounds, mongrels, spaniels, curs,
      Shoughs, water-rugs, and demi-wolves are clept
      All by the name of dogs.

      Oops, that’s MacBeth.

      1. This is Hamlet:

        “For if the sun breed maggots in a dead dog, being a
        god kissing carrion”

        “O, this is counter, you false Danish dogs!”

        “Let Hercules himself do what he may,
        The cat will mew and dog will have his day.”

        1. thrakkorzog

          What, Macbeth? What’s so bad about saying Macbeth?

          1. The superstition doesn’t apply to my comment:

            “William Shakespeare’s play Macbeth is said to be cursed, so actors avoid saying its name when in the theatre (the euphemism “The Scottish Play” is used instead). Actors also avoid even quoting the lines from Macbeth before performances, particularly the Witches’ incantations. Outside a theatre and after a performance, the play can be spoken of openly. If an actor speaks the name “Macbeth” in a theatre prior to one of the performances, he or she is required to leave the theatre building, spin around three times, spit, curse, and then knock to be allowed back in.

            “One version of this legend claims that it was the actor who played Lady Macbeth who died during the play’s first production run and that Shakespeare himself had to assume the role. There is no evidence that this legend is factual.”

          2. It’s been years since I was in a performance of MacBeth (as Unnamed Lord #5, I think).

          3. I also got to play Tybalt’s corpose in Juliet’s tomb.

          4. thrakkorzog

            Look at Mr Bigshot actor here. I got to play spear carrier #3 in Julius Caeser.

          5. straffinrun

            Super offense joke about Othello and a spear came to mind, but *whew* didn’t click post before deleting.

  13. Pope Jimbo

    Whoooosh!

    That is the sound of the reporter missing the point that even though opioid prescriptions are down, overdoses are up. Why would restricting access to opioids lead to more deaths? Hmmm…..

    The reporter even talked with two legislators who lost kids to heroin overdoses (which they turned to after getting addicted via prescriptions) about their bills to crack down even harder. I doubt that the reporter asked them if they realized that restricting opioid prescriptions is actually what made their kids turn to heroin and if they had less laws, their kids might still be living.

    I really hate these assholes who think that everyone should suffer from severe pain just to prevent a few people from getting addicted to a pain killer.

    1. KibbledKristen

      I had a friend who was vehemently pro-Drug War because her brother in law was a meth addict. I said “but meth is illegal. How could he be a meth addict if it’s illegal?” She had no answer. I hope I made her think about it.

      1. thrakkorzog

        I’ve actually managed to get my sister who fucking hates heroine, because her son OD’d on heroine to grudgiingly accept that legalization isn’t the worst idea in the world.

        Hey, so let’s legalize all drugs, hands up for everybody working a day job that wants to start shooting up or smoking crack pipes as soon as the rules are lifted.

        Hmm. It t turns out people who engage in self destructive behavior are already part of marginalized groups, and we would probably have better luck trying to use social pressure to get them to reform, rather than turning them into criminals.

        1. UnCivilServant

          Too many female heros? That sounds a lot like sexism.

        2. Lachowsky

          One of my mechanics is a devout evangelical christian. I have argued with him about drug laws for more than 3 years now. About six months he finally conceded that drug laws accomplish nothing but harm and that ALL drugs should be legal.

          I consider this a personal triumph.

        3. Endless Mike

          Since prohibition was lifted, a guy can’t even FIND bathtub Gin anymore.

  14. Rufus the Monocled

    Canadians.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOGLAoqC7zM

    If I were America and thinking to invade this place….I’d think twice or thrice about it.

    1. UnCivilServant

      “We do stupid things too!” is not a great defense.

      1. Bobarian LMD

        Yeah, but they spell it with a c up there… defence.

        1. KibbledKristen

          Yet they they spell words like “destabilise” with an “s”. Buncha weirdos.

  15. straffinrun

    From a friend of a friend’s FB wall:

    I have a friend that spent a fortune on his wife’s lung cancer treatments. She ended up dying anyway. Seems unethical for doctors to take money for treatments when they know the patient has little chance of survival. I don’t think this happens in countries that have socialized medicine. Medicine mixed with capitalism is a scam.

    1. Socialized Medicine: You’ll get nothing and like it!

    2. UnCivilServant

      How much faster would said friend’s wife have died without treatment? How was her quality of life impacted by the treatment? Was she better off? How would dying untreated on a waiting list have helped?

      1. straffinrun

        I’m not asking him. Hopefully he has a cork on the end of his fork.

        1. When you say “fork”, you mean “penis”, right?

          And when you say “cork”, you mean “cork”, right?

      2. Just a thought not a sermon

        Why couldn’t the doctors see the future and realize the patient would die?

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder

          Who forced him to pay for treatment? They could have just called it quits.

    3. Scruffy Nerfherder

      The friend of your friend is a retard.

      1. straffinrun

        Some stranger chimed in with: So your saying that when someone dies the doctors shouldn’t be paid?
        There’s hope.

        1. Negroni Please

          Alright! Incentive based medicine. “I’m not paying you to treat my wife motherfucker; I’m paying you to cure her. You failed. No money for you”

          1. Number.6

            What’s the warranty on this CPO lung transplant?

          2. KibbledKristen

            That sounds like a story straight from clientsfromhell.net!

    4. leonadasiv

      Seems unethical for doctors to take money for treatments when they know the patient has little chance of survival. I don’t think this happens in countries that have socialized medicine. Medicine mixed with capitalism is a scam.

      Yup doesn’t happen in socialist countries. There the is of operation success are magically higher! Oh wait, no, it’s just not an option you are given.

  16. Scruffy Nerfherder

    Manic Monday – Bastiat’s Fallacy Edition

    The government is us – it is the way you and me achieve goals together in society.
    We want to have a social safety net. We can join together as a society in government to do that

    1. achieve goals together

      whether you like them or not.

    2. Ok, go for it. Where’s the opt-out clause?

      1. leonadasiv

        Oh you can’t opt out silly, the government is us, that’s like choosing to opt out of yourself.

        In a serious note, isn’t it funny how we could start somewhere similarly (i.e. the government is just a collection of people) and end up somewhere totally different? Seriously, how can you think the government can work but free people making voluntary decisions is just bullshit?

    3. Count Potato

      “The water is clean and good, because some tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards.”

      Nixon, that tree-hugging flower child.

    4. If the government is us, why do we pay taxes? Seems strange to send money to ourselves, doesn’t it? Unless, of course, there’s a separate “we” who’s getting the check.

      1. Bobarian LMD

        The ‘we’ is the warm feeling on the back of your neck. If you ask, they’ll tell you it’s rain.

    5. wdalasio

      I’d love to ask that little turd what exactly his part in “achieving our goals together” has been beyond making demands or being on the receiving end of the gravy train. In a world of a flat tax, a little bit of what he said might have a tiny bit of legitimacy. But, as things stand, some people are stuck doing a lot more of the “doing together” than can be justified in a fair exchange.

  17. Pope Jimbo

    Oh the horrors! The evil GOP is going to slash the budget for the state parks. Before you shrug your shoulders, you do realize that the budget cuts could mean that there are no more nature talks about mushrooms at the parks?

    Minnesoda has a projected budget surplus and every week we get stories about them not spending that surplus on this or that. Lots of consternation about the idea that raising user fees would keep the poor folk out of those campgrounds. Because then only rich people would go camping.

    The fact that this whole issue is really at root the problem of one time spending vs budgeted spending, doesn’t matter to the “SPEND THAT SURPLUS” crowd. By that, I mean that we have a tax (“Legacy Fund”) that was passed a few years ago. The fund is dedicated to acquiring new land and projects to make the parks more “accessible”. However, once the land is acquired or the project completed those funds can’t be used to sustain them. So the parks department now has more stuff to manage and no operations budget to do it.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Before they cut the budget, they need to gut the bureaucracy or replace the key players, because the NPS will do everything in its power to make it a pain in the ass for visitors as a response to the cuts. The last time they got caught in a shutdown, they took extremely petty actions to ensure that everyone knew how invaluable they were. In my area, they shut down one of the local roads that goes across their property just to make it difficult.

      1. Lachowsky

        When the awful republican induced government shut down happened a few years back, the only thing I noticed was that the parks people barricaded off all the public access boat ramps into the arkansas river. The gov was “shut down” but the managed to have enough time to erect barriers to keep people from putting their boats in the river.

    2. The Last American Hero

      What’s to prevent the good people of Minnesota from opening up their own wallets to pay for their parks?

      1. Pope Jimbo

        If you read the comments, you would know that use fees are a tool of the 1%. How can the poor folks afford to pay for access to the parks?

        If you raised the cost of those campsites, the poor folk would have to stay at a hotel (or something).

  18. So some guy sinks his balls into a hole and he gets a free jacket? /confused

    1. Buy this hat and you get a free bowl of soup…

      1. Pope Jimbo

        But it looks good on you Swiss!

    2. Rasilio

      Usually you want to put the jacket on before you put it in the hole

  19. Jefe Hayek

    I’m not in favor of military dictators.

    That said, when the other options in your immediate geographical vicinity are slight variations of brutal theocracy, El-Sisi doesn’t seem too bad by comparison. Low bar and all

    1. straffinrun

      Option 3) *Drops Bombs, bites pinky and hopes*

    2. Lachowsky

      Speaking of military dictators.

      Saddam seemed to keep the peace in Iraq better than what has been happening since he was deposed.

      1. Number.6

        You can add Gadaffi to that list. And Mubarack, and just about every other despot that has clawed his way into a position of power.

        1. KibbledKristen

          Tito

          1. Count Potato

            That’s not jermaine.

          2. KibbledKristen

            Don’t LaToya with me!

          3. thrakkorzog

            Damn, stop acting so Randy.

          4. KibbledKristen

            Have a cup of Joe, it’ll settle you down.

        2. Pope Jimbo

          Gadaffi gave up his WMD’s because he wanted to be sure we wouldn’t fuck with him.

          So what did we do? We fucked with him. So if you are Kim Jong Un, why would you give up WMD’s? It doesn’t guarantee that we still won’t bomb the shit out of you.

          1. Precisely. To my mind, the most damage the previous administration did to our foreign policy was attacking Libya. Here we had a regional power who had more-or-less seen the error of his ways, had given up his WMDs, and was even helping us against AQ affiliates in the area. So what did we do? Bombed the shit out of him and left him to be slaughtered by jihadis.

            W gave us a reputation for “cowboy diplomacy” which isn’t optimal, but at least our allies trusted us and our enemies and rivals couldn’t be sure we wouldn’t suddenly invade, which is not a bad place to be. Obama gave us a reputation for fickleness, idle bluster, and unpredictability, which means that neither our allies nor our rivals trust us to do what we say we’ll do.

          2. wdalasio

            Gadaffi was the one case that I just can’t for the life of me understand. It was snatching defeat out of the hands of victory.

        3. Lachowsky

          It’s not an endorsement of saddam. not at all. I’m just pointing out that the Iraqi people were “generally” better off under a brutal military dictator than they are now. It also cost the U.S. a lot less blood and treasure to have saddam run the show.

          1. Number.6

            I understand, but the same is true of the guys I mentioned.

            For example, I think the average Libyan felt safer in Libya 20 years ago than they do today.

            I think there were, for a while, quite a few Marsh Arabs and Kurds who were very happy when Saddam was in removed from power. I think that those who are still alive today might want to revise that view.

  20. Just Say’n

    “ISIS does what ISIS is gonna do.”

    It’s a good thing we don’t prioritize religious minorities in our refugee program. Genocide is totes cool if it’s committed against the ‘right people’. Stay woke everybody

  21. straffinrun

    Sergio G. is starting to look like the world’s other biggest asshole, A Rod.

    1. I spend all day rooting for that jerk, (he’s on my fantasy team) and then go down to the bar to gloat, only to find out due to carry overs I would have won twice as much if he had choked, fucking greasy little spaniard.

      1. straffinrun

        Take solace that Rory didn’t win.

    2. Wait, other? Sergio used to be a bit of a dick to fans that heckled him when he tried to hit the ball (think Ryder Cup fans from New York) but he’s probably one of the nicest and most humble guys out there playing today. He had all but accepted that his career was gonna fall short of his expectations and he acts about as graciously as anybody on tour.

      Asshole doesn’t describe him very well, IMO.

      1. straffinrun

        I put him in the spoiled box a long time ago. If he’s changed, well, second chance.

  22. “Juan Williams laments that blacks sometimes stray off the plantation.”

    I think it’s more like concern-trolling about *real* black conservatives like William Coleman who worked to get Republicans to get “civil rights” bills passed – by implication, if only modern black Republicans could be like Mr. Coleman!

    The function of *real* black conservatives, Williams seems to think, is to get progressive policies adopted, including empowering the IRS to raise taxes on segregated schools without Congressional approval. And it’s even worse than that because IRS policy would consider a private school to be segregated if it didn’t have “enough” black students, even if it’s in a community where black people prefer the government schools.

    So by implication, modern black conservatives are the Wrong Kind of Conservative because they focus on actually supporting conservative policies even if this means fighting against liberals.

    I would also note that William Coleman is dead, so he fits the media definition of a Good Republican.

    1. PS – unfortunately, Clarence Thomas, before he was a justice, supported the IRS raising taxes on “racist” schools.

  23. straffinrun

    “I have a spectacular female athlete,” coach Brian Calhoun told the Hartford Courant. “There’s nothing more to say. To approach it in any other way might create some sort of issue or conversation.”

    Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Shorter coach – “Please don’t make me deal with this situation. I can’t win.”

    2. Number.6

      My fucking ridiculous state strikes again.

    3. Did he say he was talking about the dude with the mustache when he made that statement? Because maybe he really does have a spectacular female athlete on his team in addition to the guy that decided to start shopping at Forever 21. Which would make him technically right…and we all know that’s the best kind of right.

  24. PieInTheSKy

    Why people prefer unequal societies

    I am not sure its prefer as much as realize it is normal and inevitable

  25. Rufus the Monocled

    New prog logic. Some doofus investor was spewing all the usual Obama was awesome crap and when I pointed out his bombing campaigns his rebuttal was ‘we’re talking about missiles not bombs!’

    I have no idea what that meant and I didn’t stick around to find out.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Tell us his name so we can avoid his investment advice.

      1. Rufus the Monocled

        He also asserted Obama ‘calmed the Middle-East’ and that Trump has destabilized it.

        /Bullwinkle’s pull a rabbit out of hat trick.

        Retards.

        1. You sure this isn’t performance art or something?

          Because everybody knows George Bush destabilized the Middle East. And before he came along, it was all rainbow meadows and chocolate rivers where everybody danced and sang together in a giant love-fest.

        2. KibbledKristen

          Is he functionally brain dead? Or does he have some sort of neurological memory loss problem?

          1. commodious spittoon

            Politics is a neurodegenerative disease.

    2. Lachowsky

      I was at my sisters house on Friday. She asked me about the missle thing. I sort of shrugged and said, It’s the same shit we have been doing in the middle east for 16 years. She (my sister is pretty apolitical) said that sounds about right but she was concerned because her girls (age 12 and 13) had come hone from school concerned b/c there teachers had told them that we are now at war. That kinda pissed me off.

      For fucks sake, we have been dicking around in the middle east for the girls entire lives. The girls uncle actually fought in Iraq in 2012. The girls teacher has the audacity to scare a bunch of children with reports of war now? TDS. I swear it.

      1. TripodKat

        Teachers straight up teaching lies to your family.

      2. commodious spittoon

        TDS suggests that these people were reasonable and reasonably informed prior to Trump’s election. It’s just that Obama gave them an eight year pass on having to pay attention.

        1. Lachowsky

          “and reasonably informed”

          you probably have a point there. American adventuring in the M.E. has been largely ignored by the MSM for a long time.

  26. KibbledKristen

    But I really had no idea there were this many states-rights and local-rights Democrats out there.

    I can’t decide who is more hypocritical when “the other guy” is in power.

  27. Drake

    This is going to shock some people – Dan Rather is a liar.

    1. The Elite Elite

      What? He’s the very model of integrity driven journalism. This is clearly a smear campaign against the man who exposed that evil BOOOOOSH!

      1. Bobarian LMD

        I wanted to sing this post ala “Pirates of Penzance”.

    2. Pope Jimbo

      WTF? Why is he smiling? Where is his war face?

      Seriously, when I got my picture taken in boot camp, they were very, very clear that there would be no smiling.

      Figures that he lied about that shit. I really hope he was a Parris Island boot.

      1. Chipwooder

        Our kill hat sat there and watched every single picture being taken to ensure there was no smiling.

  28. Drake

    The Fascists Democrats want some books burned.

    1. You know who else wanted to burn books…

      1. UnCivilServant

        The Ordo Hereticus?

        1. For a while, yes.

    2. Count Potato

      “Grijalv accused the scientists of “lying to children about the world we live in to further corporate polluter profits” and said that doing so was “cruel.” Johnson stated that the scientists had sent “scientifically inaccurate materials on climate change to public school teachers across the country” at the behest of ominous right wing donors and the Charles and David Koch brothers.”

      For the children!

      Kochtopus!

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      If this gets confirmed, there’s going to be a shitstorm.

      1. KibbledKristen

        Hillary fans with brush it off, just like they did when an U.S. Ambassador was murdered. Even people in the fucking State Dept didn’t think it was any big deal when Stevens was killed. Because Hillary.

      2. Count Potato

        There are two things here:

        1. None of this stuff can ever be confirmed, because almost everyone involved is a known liar.

        2. The media will ignore it anyway, smugly dismissed as “another fake scandal”

        1. Colonel Slanders

          1. Yup and 2. Yes they will. But it will have the ancillary effect of knocking a few more people off the wall and firmly into the ‘burn this motherfucker to the ground’ camp.

  29. TripodKat

    This weekend I finished up the bulk of the work on my new office, but I have some extra space still. I’m thinking about getting a VR setup and doing room scale. Now I just need to find an extra $800 for a Vive headset. If you guys pitch in you can come over and try it out. I’ll let you try out porn on it if you pay for the entire headset.

    1. Drake

      Why fix up the room if you’ll be staring into a VR headset? Just buy a comfortable chair and put it wherever.

      1. TripodKat

        Room scale lets you actually walk around 1-to-1 in a virtual world. I could go with something more simple like an Oculus Rift, which only has 1 sensor that sits on a desk. I am worried I’ll get motion sickness though.

        1. Gadfly

          If you are going for the hand-held “touch” controllers, the Rift has the superior design. While a Rift has a 1-sensor desk option, they also have a 3-sensor room-scale option with the touch controllers, which IMO is the superior VR set-up (disclaimer: I have a Rift, so I may be biased, but I’ve seen the other touch controllers and they look bulky and awkward by comparison).

          1. TripodKat

            The page won’t load at my work, but I’ll check it out when I get home. Thanks for your reply — I didn’t even realize that they have a 3-sensor option. I may have to go with this since its so much cheaper than the Vive.

            On the other hand, didn’t John Carmack recently lose the the IP infringement lawsuit to Zenimax? Will Facebook even keep getting to sell the Rift in the future? I get worried about what this will mean for the platform’s software prospects.

            Either way, thanks for the info!

          2. Gadfly

            FYI, the third sensor is sold separately, so add like $70 to whatever price you are getting for the Rift + touch if you go that route. As for the lawsuit, I believe the people who won took the smart route and opted to receive a giant wad of cash instead of shutting down the product line, so things should be fine on the consumer end.

    2. Number.6

      “Clean up on aisle TripodCat”

    3. ChipsnSalsa

      I hope your new room is floor to ceiling tile, because you will want to be able to fire hose the entire room with bleach.

      1. TripodKat

        You have to supply the bleach as well, its in the fine print of our agreement.

    4. thrakkorzog

      Every review I read or hear about VR is that after about 5 minutes you want to throw up. I don’t think I want to put my boner through that kind of abuse. (Obligatory, I’ve abused it enough already joke.)

      1. TripodKat

        I tried an Oculus Rift out at my local Best Buy and was fine, but I was playing it in a mode that allowed me to have 1-to-1 movement with my body, so it felt natural. I am concerned that if I have a controller, that moving my field of view in VR with a joystick while sitting stationary will probably cause motion sickness.

        I think the porn stuff though it largely POV and stationary though, so you shouldn’t get motion sick with this.

      2. The Last American Hero

        I’ve got a cardboard and have been pretty impressed for the price. Emphasis on for the price. It certainly has sparked an interest in the more expensive units.

      3. Bobarian LMD

        The whole purpose of abusing your boner is to make it throw up.

        What’s the problem, again?

  30. This is a test of the Warty Alert system.

    1. *ducks and covers*

      1. As if that would help…

        1. It’s what I learned in elementary school.

          One day they wheeled in one of those projectors, and the teacher spent 15 minutes trying to get it to work before showing a terrifying film about a turtle.

  31. KibbledKristen

    So, fiscal geniuses…I am going to get a nice payout from my condo after we sign a deal with a developer. I am thinking about pocketing the cash and renting indefinitely so I can be flexible (I may start looking for work in Colorado in a couple years if my company can’t or won’t hire me – I’m currently a contractor).

    I’d like to keep the cash somewhat liquid, but would like to it work for me also. I feel like, if I don’t have to pay taxes on it (my dad is not sure whether I need to put it back into real estate after two years or if I can hold it indefinitely tax-free since the condo is my primary residence), I might as well hold it and not buy a new house until retirement.

    1. UnCivilServant

      Don’t quote me on it, but I think that even with a primary residence the spectre of capital gains will still haunt you.

      1. KibbledKristen

        Not sure how accurate this is, but it indicates capital gains doesn’t apply under $250k in profit. I’ll be making a bit less than that.

      2. The Last American Hero

        You can get one freebee under certain circumstances, but better be sure you want to use it now rather than at retirement.

    2. Number.6

      I am not a registered investment professional, and this does not constitute investment advice, but …

      This is more of a ‘probably don’t do’ rather than a ‘do’.

      I’m not sure you need much in the way of warnings. Treasury rates are low at the moment, so fixed instruments in general are unlikely to keep up with inflation. Public debt is unsustainable in the long term, but municipal bonds of carefully selected cities might be worth looking at, assuming they’re tax efficient. Equities are by most reasonable measurements, overvalued, and can’t maintain current levels, but the market is irrational and not amenable to market timing. Commodities and commodity-based derivatives require constant vigilance and for that reason alone, probably worth avoiding unless you really can (and want to ) be glued to a Bloomberg Terminal.

      You’re probably on the right road concerning staying out of real estate if you can avoid it, unless you’re presented with a real bargain in a major metro area – although it sounds like your nomadic options are tempting. If I could exit the mortgage mill at the moment without a tax hit, I would, even though I’d forego ‘free money’ via the mortgage interest tax deduction.

    3. Lachowsky

      If I was expecting a big payout, I would buy a bulldozer and either learn to operate it myself or hire someone to run one for me. It’s a solid asset that holds its value if not operated and can make money if it is operated.

    1. TripodKat

      Wow, why didn’t they just pay another airline to send their employees? Or maybe they should have upped the payment for passengers willing to give up their seats? Even if they had to pay $3,000 for a person to give up their seat, it still would be better than the lawsuit or potential assault charges that could result from forcibly removing a paying passenger – not to mention all of the terrible publicity this generates.

      1. Rasilio

        My guess is there is little to no risk of lawsuit because that passenger is going to find himself charged with interfering with the flight crew and maybe if he’s lucky those charges will be dropped if he signs an agreement to not sue

        1. TripodKat

          Huh, what a fucked up world this is..

        2. Drake

          I don’t know. If that ever got to a jury United is screwed.

      2. Rasilio

        Not to mention, Chicago to Louisville is like a 4 hour drive they are literally so close that once you factor in parking at both airports, dealing with security, and waiting for your baggage at the other end it would be faster to drive than to fly.

        They offered $800 each for 4 passengers to take a later flight, it is likely that for less than that they could have hired a limo or small bus to take them there for less than $3200

    2. Pope Jimbo

      Props to that guy for not going quietly.

    3. Drake

      Meet the new owner of United Airlines. Man would I love to be on that civil court jury.

    4. Bobarian LMD

      Had I been on that flight, I’d have counter-offered the $800 and a rental car, rather than the hotel; Lou-ah-vuhl ain’t that far from Chi-town.

  32. Enough About Palin

    Dear Kim Jong Un,

    Our missiles actually work.

    Best,
    EAP

    1. Lachowsky

      Dear EAP,
      I’m fucking insane. I don’t care about the lives of my fellow Koreans and I will do whatever I want because I’m a spoised bitch of a man-child playing god with the lIves of the people I have been entitled to ruin. Take your logic and fuck yourself with it.
      Sincerely,

      Dear leader, most distinguished and honored, high priest of the prolteriat, supreme overlord, and most gracious master, Mr. Kim Jong Un.

      1. Bobarian LMD

        There is actual logic in dealing with NK. I believe there is an iron law, as well.

        More of what you reward, less of what you punish.

        When any of the last 3 Kims acts the crazy douchebag, he gets rewarded with some international acquiescence.

        1. wdalasio

          So, you’re suggesting we nuke their nuke site?

  33. Drake

    Here is the feel-good picture of the day.

    1. straffinrun

      Someone is having fun trolling. That thar is some good ole fashion funnin`.

      1. Drake

        I have no idea what is real and what is snark when it comes to antifada. I’m going to believe it’s real and awesome.

        1. straffinrun

          Fifth Avenue Antifa‏ @FifthAveAntiFa
          I’m just happy that we backed the Communist during WW2. If we hadn’t, Europe would have been 100 white right now. 0% diversity

          All his responses are cliche versions of what Trumpista’s believe.

          1. KibbledKristen

            We “backed” the commies during WWII? Last I checked, we formed a convenient, necessary, and temporary alliance with them.

          2. straffinrun

            The “commies” were white, too. Churchill said he find something good about the devil if Hitler invaded hell. The guy is doing a fine job pushing the trolling just to the line of absurdity, but not over it.

          3. KibbledKristen

            Yeah, I am seriously confused about what that Tweeter account actually is. I’m 80% on it being a troll, but the real antifa whatevers are so prone to ridiculousness, I just can’t tell.

          4. commodious spittoon

            Fifth Avenue Antifa
            @FifthAveAntiFa
            Why are hate-dogs even allowed in the US?

          5. R C Dean

            I’m just happy that we backed the Communist during WW2. If we hadn’t, Europe would have been 100 white right now.

            Yup, check out that shining beacon of diversity, Russia.

            I’d like to say Fifth Ave Antifa is just trolling, but these days . . . .

    2. Count Potato

      While that’s obviously a staged photo, I can’t tell if that twitter account is parody or not.

      1. Drake

        I can’t either. I truly cannot tell what is parody and what is sincere with antifada.

        1. Drake

          If Andy Kaufman is alive, he’s leading an antifada cell.

  34. The Late P Brooks

    I’d like to keep the cash somewhat liquid, but would like to it work for me also.

    Just put it in CDs and live on the interest.

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    Thanks, Alan. And Ben. And Janet.

    1. This whole low interest thing has been messing up my retirement plans. I was planning on paying off the house, buying an el-cheapo Toyota, and living off of the interest. Now I’ll have to work the orphans a little harder and longer than I expected.

      1. ..the interest of accumulated wealth that is.

    2. Coming soon to CBS – Alan and Ben and Janet are impoverished by their own policies, so to save on expenses they get an apartment together in a depressed industrial town in the Midwest.

      1. This being CBS, I’m thinking more sex comedy than social commentary.

        JANET: Hey, check out that hot bartender, he sure raises *my* interest.

        BEN: Back off, I saw him first.

        1. ALAN: “Come on you two, your sex appeal has considerably declined in value since 1914.

          1. BARTENDER: Sorry, I’m only interested in hard currency.

          2. ChipsnSalsa

            *canned studio audience laugh track*

          3. Bobarian LMD

            The Big Bang, with three retarded Sheldons.

      2. ChipsnSalsa

        They would read prepared statements at each other blaming the other for not making the coffee or taking out the trash.

  35. TripodKat

    Does anyone here think that the U.S. bombing in Syria may have helped Trump’s negotiating position with the Chinese leader? I’m curious of what my fellow glibs think.

    1. R C Dean

      I actually think it was a smart move. Better if we really had solid intel that an actual Sarin attack was launched from that airbase, but even if it wasn’t, it gave a good message to a lot of people that the days of limp-wristed diplomacy without consequences were over. There’s a lot of bad actors that will see the need to step a little more carefully – Iran, Russia, China, the Norks, etc. Its hard to negotiate with someone when they see no downside to not doing a deal, or not sticking to a deal once its done.

      1. TripodKat

        I have to say I agree with a lot of what you’re saying here. As much as I loathe the idea of getting ourselves even further entangled with the ME than we were under Obama, I do have to admit that I don’t think that most of the world leaders that are more… adversarial… to the U.S. didn’t really seem to think Obama was much of a threat. Russia seems to have expanded its influence heavily during Obama, even annexing territory from a democratic nation. If the idea was to change the chips on the table, I think the strike in Syria may have been a good idea.

  36. Pope Jimbo

    Take a hot bath, lose weight.

    How does this work? Now, I’m just an old country columnist without any fancy scientific schooling, but I’m thinking of an ice cube in a sauna. But there are probably limits, and drawbacks — say, six hours in a hot bath counteracts a bowl of ice cream but makes you look all-over pruney.

    1. Lachowsky

      “The study wasn’t some vast clinical experiment; only 12 men were observed. But Loughborough boffins say they’ll continue to investigate the healing powers of heat as well as its caloric impact.”

      In other words, This is all bullshit and should be ignored.

    2. KibbledKristen

      I found out from Naked and Afraid that 15 minutes of shivering is equivalent to an hour of exercise. Trying to see if the deli downstairs will let me in their freezer.

      1. My wife loves that show – I’ll note that many of the contestants need to some squats to get their bums in shape.

        1. KibbledKristen

          If I were going to do that show, I’d fatten myself up even more than I am now.

      2. Lachowsky

        Nothing chaps my ass worse than standing outside naked and wet on a cold windy day.

      3. Pope Jimbo

        Ray Cronise is all over this. He is the guy who was behind Penn Jillette’s weight loss.

        1. KibbledKristen

          That’s really fascinating! I wonder how I can get cold, short of cold showers, in the midst of a DC summer?

          1. Lachowsky

            Find any body of water that has a temp below 98 degrees. If you stay in it long enough, you will diffuse enough heat to bring your body temp down to hypothermic temperature.

          2. Count Potato

            Ice bucket challenge?

    3. straffinrun

      Depends on what you’re doing in the tub. If your rubber ducky is the “one”, I could see burning that many calories.

      1. Bobarian LMD

        Not really a bath, more of a ‘soup’?

        /ewwwww!

  37. The Late P Brooks

    Does anyone here think that the U.S. bombing in Syria may have helped Trump’s negotiating position with the Chinese leader?

    “Hey Xi- come over here. Now, hold my beer and watch this.”

  38. straffinrun

    Stepped out for an hour there to watch the season finale of Walking Dead. Next season is going to be Walking Dead to Me.

    1. Watching the show is like a slow but mostly boring train wreck. And oh noezzzz, another “main” character I didn’t care about died. What am I going to do?

      There are so many post-apocalyptic items that the show could explore – like the problems of city folks learning mass farming, or replacement of gasoline powered vehicles with horses and carts, long-term zombie defenses, or the decay of the infrastructure. Instead that stuff gets glossed over for not-so interesting character developments, and even the zombies have become an afterthought.

      1. straffinrun

        Yep, they are missing many possible angles that would be more interesting than seeing KARL! about to get his head bashed in by Negan for the fourth time. Was hoping they could make this season into a Hobbes vs Locke battle of beliefs, but nope.

      2. Drake

        I’ve enjoyed John Ringo’s zombie series because he does explore all those kinds of issues. Ringo thinks like the Army NCO he was. Once people get their shit together, they start figuring that stuff out – and killing zombies on an industrial scale.

        1. straffinrun

          The plan is to find a safe haven from the anarchy of infected humanity

          There’s that word again.

      3. robc

        A TV show based around an updated Lucifer’s Hammer would be nice.

        1. Drake

          The Syfy Channel has done a great job with the Expanse novels. Maybe they and HBO will reach back into classic SyFi for inspiration.

          1. Nephilium

            I’m a bit surprised that there has been nothing done with Neal Stephenson’s work. I could see a TV show running through Cryptonomicon or the Diamond Age doing well. The only thing some quick searching has found is a possible movie for Snow Crash (rumored to begin filming this year) and SyFy announcing a Diamond Age show back in 2007 (with no news later then 2009 regarding it).

          2. thrakkorzog

            It seems like Snow Crash could be somewhat easy to make into a show, since the basic idea is that it’s 20 minutes into the future, and society is a bunch of highways, strip malls and gated communities.

            Where could they find such a similar looking community to shoot in around LA?

          3. commodious spittoon

            Zodiac, too. Even set in the eighties. Conspiracy, adventure, Boston, a garbage island, PBCs, what’s not to love?

          4. commodious spittoon

            *PCBs

            Figures I’d fuck up the thing I had to google to make sure I had it right

          5. R C Dean

            There are so many excellent stories out there that could be converted to video or long-form TV, its depressing when you see the crap stories that actually get made. “Oh, look. Another nine-figure superhero snoozer. Yay.”

        2. Rasilio

          Lucifers Hammer is actually just about the perfect vehicle for a modern TV show. Disaster porn is in, it is fairly dark and gritty with just a glimmer of hope, it is long enough to run 3 – 5 seasons, has a lot of characters, plenty of sex if you want to put it on a cable channel, lots of groundwork laid in story/character development but enough left unsaid that there is still room for the tv writers/directors to make it their own, etc.

          Only thing that probably wouldn’t go over so well is the really strong pro nuke message

      4. Michael

        Every time I watch that show I think, “who’s been maintaining all the lawns?”

        1. UnCivilServant

          Illegal Skeleton labor

    2. Juvenile Bluster

      I see United Airlines decided that once the silly “leggings” kerfuffle ended, they wanted a real public relations disaster to deal with.

      I mean, I’m not surprised by the Chicago PD’s part in this; that’s what they do. I’m also not surprised by United, given that they’re easily the worst airline in existence.

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        Goddammit.

      2. leonadasiv

        One time in was on a united flight, and they announced that every computer in their system had gone down. I know they were trying to keep us from getting mad about being stuck for an hour, but it didn’t help my confidence in the flight.

  39. AlmightyJB

    “To approach it in any other way might create some sort of issue or conversation”

    Sounds like he’s in on the joke.

    1. TripodKat

      I thought this was pretty fucking hilarious. You can almost hear the eye-roll as he was asked to give a quote. “God damn, I hope this doesn’t start some sort of fucking ‘conversation’.”

  40. KibbledKristen

    I heard on the new radio this morning about how Egypt is looking at curtailing whatever few civil liberties they have in the wake of the church bombings. The tone was more like a lament at the loss of freedom for those poor Egyptians. . But yet, in the U.S., when we have a terrorist attack, taking away liberties is OK. It’s necessary for “safety”.

    Jeezus do I ever hate hypocrites.

    1. KibbledKristen

      *news radio. My car radio is not new.

  41. My wife and I finished the last season of Psych.

    About as satisfying an ending for such a show as one could expect. Very entertaining.

    1. leonadasiv

      Yeah it was a pretty good ending. That is by far my favorite TV series. Still watch it to this day.

    2. Fatty Bolger

      I started it years ago and didn’t really like it. I assume it gets better?

    1. leonadasiv

      What are they gonna do? Offer to let the immigrants ride their trains into Norway?

    2. straffinrun

      He added: ‘Terrorists want us to be afraid, want us to change our behaviour, want us to not live our lives normally, but that is what we’re going to do.

      So you’re going to be afraid, change behaviour and not live your lives normally. Swedes are weird.

      1. AlmightyJB

        To be fair, no different than all the puzzles here.

        1. AlmightyJB

          Pussies. My spell check is a prude

  42. commodious spittoon

    One of my favorite parody accounts:

    Chelsea Clinton
    @ChelseeClinton
    It’s no coincidence women earn 73 cents for every dollar men earn. Is this why life expectancy of women is so less than male counterparts?

    Chelsea Clinton
    @ChelseeClinton
    Sexual harassment and exploitation in the workplace should never be tolerated. We must do better.

    Chelsea Clinton
    @ChelseeClinton
    It only took less than 100 days for the GOP to undo the good my mother would have done. #Syria

    1. AlmightyJB

      “parody accounts”

      Are you sure

      1. ChipsnSalsa

        *squints hard while reading*

        can’t tell.

    2. Chelsea Clinton
      @ChelseeClinton
      It only took less than 100 days for the GOP to undo the good my mother would have done. #Syria

      That’s golden.

  43. The Late P Brooks

    Honest, unbiased news from NPR

    The Affordable Care Act’s worst enemies are now in charge of the vast range of health coverage the law created. They’re also discussing changes that could affect a wider net of employment-based policies and Medicare coverage for seniors.

    Although Republicans failed last month in their first attempt to repeal and replace the ACA, President Donald Trump vows the effort will continue. And even if Congress does nothing, Trump has suggested he might sit by and “let Obamacare explode.”

    Health insurance for the 20 million who benefited from the ACA’s expanded coverage is especially at risk. But they’re not the only ones potentially affected. Here’s how what’s going on in Washington might touch you.

    Without government funding, how will we get the truth?

  44. Worker and Parasite

    What makes “The Real Me” even more stunning is that the bass line was Entwistle’s first take.

    1. Bobarian LMD

      I like that they had to buy 7 DeAngelos to record ‘My Generation’ because they couldn’t get replacement strings.

  45. Jefe Hayek

    My first trip to r/conspiracy for the week

    My crazy theory: Alot of the land under the ocean has seemingly been carved by massive machinery, go look it up, why is there soo much fucking sand in Africa? Looks like someone was excavating, and there is some other odd things that kind of coorelate with this: Kalkajaka mountain in Australia is a granite mountain that shouldn’t really exist, it is said to be the remains of an ancient mine. We were created as slaves, but then grew to a consciousness level were our intellectualism actually threatened the stability of whoever was collecting what. Almost like A Snake offering you an apple, and you suddenly know your naked. I believe something works to suppress our own ability to evolve, a lot of it is us, but there are distractions and desires that truly stop us from evolving. We know there is corruption, war, famine, etc in the world caused by greedy people but yet we have done nothing to try to evolve out of that, to create a different path.

    1. Number.6

      Friends shouldn’t let friends wade in derp as deep as that.

    2. R C Dean

      We were created as slaves, but then grew to a consciousness level were our intellectualism actually threatened the stability of whoever was collecting what.

      Dude, Assassin’s Creed is a video game, not a documentary.

      1. commodious spittoon

        Hell, he’s basically describing of the Warcraft universe: the Titan Pantheon creates the Earthen to serve as drudges in shaping the world of Azeroth, which is itself a giant piece of Titan artifice, and to help contain the Old Gods who eventually manage to corrupt their creations and bring about the diffusion of sentient races.

      2. thrakkorzog

        Alternate take: Scientoligist.

    3. Gadfly

      Sounds like someone took the mumbo-jumbo storyline about the “Precursors” in the Assassin’s Creed games a bit too seriously.

      1. robc

        I was thinking What Can You Say About Chocolate Covered Manhole Covers?, but I have Niven on the brain from my earlier comment.

        1. robc

          Which would make a good movie, with a better title.

    4. Rick C-137

      Used to study conspiracy theories back in the day, but that is a little too far down the rabbit hole for me

    5. KibbledKristen

      We were created as slaves, but then grew to a consciousness level were our intellectualism actually threatened the stability of whoever was collecting what.

      Sounds like a line straight outta Scientology 101 (or OTIII as it were)