By But I like cocktails and lurking
I am not a big fan of beans, or at least I didn’t used to be. Then I discovered black beans. I never cook with any other bean. They are less grainy, more flavorful, and heartier than other beans. They just have more substance. They can make a stand alone meal, a side dish, or compliment any main dish. Let us explore the magic of this under appreciated hero of the bean world.
Black Bean Dip
Not as tasty as this recipe.
1 15oz can of unseasoned black beans
3 strips of bacon microwaved just short of crispy (3 minutes on high then 30 second intervals until done)
1/3 sweet onion
2 chicken boullion cubes
½ teaspoon crushed garlic
½ teaspoon ground cayenne pepper
Pre-grated cheddar cheese
Fresh chopped tomato
Sliced pickled jalepeno
Put all ingredients into a blender or food processor. Blend on high until it has a smooth consistency. Use a silicone spatula or spoon to scrape into a small oven-safe dish. Bake at 350 for about 30 minutes or until you see bubbling. It is essentially re-fried black beans made in ¼ the time.
Top with grated cheese, chopped tomato, chopped fresh red onion, and a few jalepeno slices. Dip with corn chips.
This is a recipe for two people. Double if you have more people. My wife and I will whip this up, usually on a Sunday evening, sit in front of the TV and watch a movie while we eat. It makes quite a satisfying meal.
Bean Dip As A Compliment
If I make a taco salad, enchiladas, tacos, nachos, or any similar dish, I use the black bean dip as a foundation for all of the other ingredients. I simply spoon it onto the shell/tortilla before putting the meat on. It is a wonderful complimentary flavor.
Black Bean Soup or Black Beans and Rice
Put all of the same ingredients into a pot. No processor this time. You can put one pork neck bone instead of the bacon if you like, otherwise slice the bacon into 1 inch sections and toss in raw. Chop the onions yourself. Toss a few slices of jalepeno in. Thin with 1-2 cups of water. Bring to a boil, turn down to simmer, and cover. When the meat comes off of the neckbone easily, it is done (about one hour). Pull the meat off of the bone with your fingers and put back in the pot. Toss the bone to the dog. Serve over rice. If you thinned it down with water to a soup, serve over rice in a bowl. If no rice, then with Ritz crackers or corn chips. If you left it thick enough, you can spoon over rice on a plate. This can also be served as a nice complimentary side dish to any non-soup main dish.
Very little effort and time is required for these recipes and the payoff is sweet.
My favorite hangover breakfast is runny eggs over refried black beans, plus Cholula.
Eggs and beans? Do you enjoy the aroma of a freshly fired musket?
Trench mortar.
Enough of that recipe and it will sound like one.
I love Cholula, I go through that stuff practically by the gallon.
Cholula actually has flavor, unlike 90% of hot sauces.
Tapatio or GTFO
I’m sorry to hear that.
Bunch of savages. Crystal is the superior commonly-found hot sauce for any application.
Now if you can find some Matouk’s Hot Pepper Sauce, we can talk about perfection.
I love and use Crystal as well. But Cholula has more flavor.
I’m not familiar with Tapatio, but if I see it I will definitely try it.
It’s just red pepper and vinegar. Not nearly as good as Cholula. I use it on quesadillas, and that’s about it.
Cholula has pequin and arbol peppers in it; both delicious. Good on everything.
And you can buy it at Costco in giant bottles.
Awesome product.
Meh, I’ll stick with Cholula.
Cholula has its place in the kitchen, but El Yucateco’s habanero sauce is the best. Either the unroasted version that is a natural orange color or this stuff for even more kick.
https://www.amazon.com/El-Yucateco-Extra-Habanero-Mayakut/dp/B004MXY70K
Sambal is my go-to hot sauce. Yeah, yeah, it’s more like a paste than a sauce – don’t care. I was fortunate enough to be introduced to it by my then-roommate’s Indonesian grandmother as a garnish to her delightful lumpia.
Best hangover food is my fresh salsa and a jar of pickle juice. Nummy.
So… Huevos Rancheros?
Pretty much. That’s what I’ll order if I’m going out for breakfast. Cooking for myself, it’s whatever gets me sitting and shoveling food into my mouth quickly.
Yeah, my huevos recipe for dinner is quite different. I’m really hungry in the morning, so everything comes out of a can, including the salsa.
Best hangover food is whatever you eat after drinking enough pickle juice and water until you’re able to take a piss.
Or steak and eggs with a side of charro beans.
Lots of protein and fat with re-hydration and electrolytes.
I like to make black bean soup with salty country ham. Absolutely delicious.
Black Bean soup is a winter necessity.
*cums*
Just about any part of the pig works. Pigs are yummy.
Sorry, red beans and rice is the ultimate poor ass bachelor dish. You can eat for two weeks straight off of $1.50’s worth supplies.
Admittedly, after about a week and a half into eating that you’re going to end up in one of those old cartoon scenarios where everybody around you starts to look like a hot dog or hamburger. But spices help alleviate that.
That’s why you add in some Mexican Chorizo, although it will wreck the cheap budget of the meal.
If you get REAL chorizo (lymph node meat), it’s usually .99/lb or less.
Utility Cuts FTW!
A little of the real stuff goes a long way, since it cooks down to almost nothing but runny flavor.
Perfect for making chicken breast taste good.
I use it similarly to the Tinga on this menu:
http://www.guisados.co/menu/
Chorizo…in red beans and rice? I think you misspelled Andouille.
I think lentil curry and rice is a great balance between affordability and nutrition.
Palak dal (spinach in spiced lentils) with naan (or whatever unleavened bread is cheapest)
I hate black beans
Oh yeah?! Well maybe they hate you right back! Ever think of that, Mr. Food Bigot?
*hugs can of black beans and comforts it*
racist
*applause*
Black Beans Matter!
I hate them because they’re black
you wanna put some black (beans) in your taco?
I hear there are websites that can help with that
love the euphemisms you guys make…
Awesome. I’ll try it next taco night. No, not those “tacos”. Perverts.
*begins typing snarky comment….stops, deletes*
Is it true that they serve tacos sideways in Japan?
“Taco” means octopus. You can eat it however you want.
Can you get it fried with some marinara on the side?
That’s calamari.. fried octopus is a misuse of octopus..
https://youtube.com/#/watch?v=oNy8MUPOAtQ
In short, nope. To elaborate, noooooooooope.
not in Okinawa, the home of takuraisu aka taco rice.
I use black beans in my chili. Kidney beans are for wusses
Only pinto beans should ever go into chili. Otherwise, it’s not chili, it’s something else. Which may be ok, but not chili.
Ummmmm….never come to Texas then. Chili has no beans. Ever.
This is going to be one whiffy thread.
Hopefully no one jack’s it with a bunch of bad puns.
I’m betting there will be a string of nutty comments.
Why? What are you jackin’ it with?
Jack whats it?
I’ll try it.
Who is the author?
I see it now.
*Goes for more coffee*
Now, I hear that beans are a magical fruit. What quantity should I consume? Are there any secondary results from eating that quantity?
Also, I hear beans are good for your heart. Are there any secondary results from eating a quantity that is good for your heart?
They’re the musical fruit.
Well beans were a staple food of the early Israelites, go on.
15oz of black beans will give you 37 grams of fiber (good I assume). But, if you’re counting carbs, that same amount gives you 63g of carbs.
You might have had different nursery rhymes growing up in Australia.
I’ve watched The Simpsons so I know about the rhyme (I think) but I wasn’t sure whether or not it was a serious question.
Need to adjust the humor-meter I guess.
Just a heads up. Absolutely nothing I post on this website will ever he a serious question.
I stopped trusting you when you took up jogging as a hobby.
Sweet
I think you mean complementary, unless your black beans tell you you’re good-looking.
Hey, I get to use this for the second time this week! “More beans, Mr. Taggart?”
Cook and dice two boneless, skinless chicken breasts (or four Boneless-Skinless chicken thighs), add sliced potatoes, corn, black beans, diced tomatoes, a diced-and-sautéed onion, and a quart of chicken broth, add whatever spices you prefer (chili powder, paprika, garlic powder, etc.) to taste, then sprinkle a layer of rice over the top and cook, covered, until the rice is done. Put a layer of cheddar cheese on top and wait for it to melt.
Eat with salsa or something.
Dammit, now i’m hungry.
what the hell is that? some sort of mexican stew/paella thing?
I like using mexican food as an analogy for anything where you can create almost infinite variety out of the same few ingredients. Like ‘genetics’.
Been listening to Jim Gaffigan?
Italian is as bad as Mexican as far as just being the same dish served 7 different ways. Outside of pizza it’s pasta with some meat and sauce on top.
No. Aside from the hot-pockets routine, i’m unfamiliar with his work.
I…. don’t really know if that’s correct. Or maybe that’s just an impression via the americanized concept of some italian food.
I always grew up with dozens of italian restaurants around, and my impression was that they could differ wildly in the approaches to the same stuff depending on what part of italy they were from. I think maybe “within each school/regional cuisine” there is a lot of mix-n-match going on… but between them, it can be pretty diverse even with the same basic concept.
i know someone could say there’s some similar regionalism effect w/ mexican food, but… beans is beans, yo.
Yes, that’s a generalization based on the Americanized version of southern Italian food. Northern Italian cuisine is largely different.
Northern Italian food is slightly better German food.
The Americanized version of Italian food is basically based around Italian food from central Italy (where pasta is a primary staple).
A lot of fantastic foods originate in Northern Italy, like prosciutto and many of the best Italian cheeses (parmigiano, asiago, gorgonzola), too many to damn it as being “slightly better German food”
Gilmore is McDonalds.
… i use teflon in my fry-oil?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6YDTfEhChgw
i never claimed to be a farmers market
Gaffigan also has a routine about the time he worked as a waiter at a Mexican restaurant in Idaho. And customers kept asking him what’s an enchilada, what’s a tostada, etc? And his answer was always ‘it’s meat in a tortilla, with vegetables, rice and beans, and cheese on the top’.
Sure, at Olive Garden.
For those of us with an Italian grandmother it was something quite different. Generally simple and hearty, though, I’ll grant you that.
*dreams of cacciatore over polenta*
Mi ai dato fame!
Italian grandmother???? You’re in the wrong part of town, son.
Are you telling me that your last name doesn’t end in “son”????
My people came from Italy, settled in CA, made their fortunes and then spread from Brazil to Calgary. A few ended up back in the old country, but we don’t talk about that…
Lots of Italians here, though, particularly up north. Mining, ya know.
And a really good bowl of pasta e fagioli – my grandpa’s is really thick and hearty, like a stew.
My aunt got my The Silver Spoon one Christmas. It’s supposedly like the Websters Unabridged of Italian cookbooks. Seriously, it’s like a cube of book. Well, as it turns out, there’s a recipe for pretty much any organic substance you can think of, but about two-thirds of the book is what you’d get if you just picked a main ingredient and then went step by step through a list and picked one or two additional ingredients to combine. Which is why you have a separate braised beef recipes for each liquid you would conceivably find in a home, soups that consist of oatmeal, milk, and stock, and recipes for antipasti that amount to “Ingredients: Olives; Directions: put in serving dish.”
“That the missiles are called tomahawks must enrage a lot of Native Americans”
https://twitter.com/ClaraJeffery/status/850761684624982016
“must”
Tell paleface squaw stop insisting what Indians should think
If you SF a link, is it still SF’ed, or is it gilmored because you did it?
will need a ruling on that from a 3rd party
https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/new-poll-finds-9-in-10-native-americans-arent-offended-by-redskins-name/2016/05/18/3ea11cfa-161a-11e6-924d-838753295f9a_story.html
Well, those savages don’t know what to think! They need enlightened white progs to tell them!
I would say he SF’ed the link. A “Gilmore” would be putting a comment in the wrong location of the thread.
thank you
She’s getting ripped in the comments.
I can’t tell who is serious or not, from the tweet to the thread.
My Favorite Comment Is That not many native Americans are snowflakes, so one person in that mess I get.
I also liked, “I think generally they have actual things to be enraged about” and “You don’t actually know any do you?”
Here’s mine:
I like the squabbling over the origin of the tomahawk. Native American or British? It’s a fuckin’ battle axe – a heavy, sharp thing on the end of a stick. Every people on earth have been making those since before the beginning of time.
How about Pork in black bean sauce?
3 lbs pork country ribs in 1 1/2 – 2 inch chunks
1/3 cup ground fermented black beans, ground until they look like coffee grounds–and you want 1/3 cup POST grind.
1/2 cup light soy sauce
1/2 cup dark soy sauce (doubleblack soy is great for this)
1 cup wine (I use mirin or shaoxing usually, but I’ve used chablis, sherry, and cheap red and gotten decent results. Shaoxing is traditional)
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 tbsp sugar
1 cup warm water
1/2 cup oil
A cornstarch/water slurry to thicken the sauce at finish
Mix all ingredients well, except pork, oil, water and the slurry. This is the uncooked sauce, set aside.
Heat the oil in a wok, dutch oven, any pan that has room, can take some stirring and has a lid.
When oil is hot, add pork, stir to brown evenly.
When pork is browned add sauce, stir to coat all pieces.
Take warm water and use it to get anything left of the sauce, pour over pork.
Stir to make sure everything’s coated and try to get most of the meat under the sauce
Allow to come to a boil, cover and turn heat to just below medium. Cook 1 hour or until tender
15 minutes before it’s done I add a bag of frozen baby brussels sprouts. For some reason they go really well with this.
When meat is tender uncover, add slurry and return to a boil to thicken the sauce (warning–the sauce really retains heat)
Serve over rice.
Substitution question:
What’s wrong with Black Bean Sauce from Lee Kum Kee?
It’s actually a different kind of black bean sauce. You won’t get the same flavor.
But, to further answer your question, Playa, there’s nothing wrong with it. LKK is a well-known and respected oriental sauce maker. (I prefer Pearl River Bridge myself, having been intro’d to it as a kid, but it’s harder to find these days . . . )
Is this kosher?
As long as there are no followup questions, yes.
Azathoth – Sounds pretty good. I will give that a try.
Beans are for peasants not upper classes libertarians
Nonsense you dirty moonshiner
You haven’t tried cassoulet. Of course ya gotta make the confit and sausages from scratch (butchering optional if yer lazy) too.
Cassoulet’s great, and I must’ve had a dozen different variations during my various sojourns through the Midi, but about the only thing they all had in common was boatloads of animal fat (usually pork) and, of course, flageolet beans.
Was cooking dinner tonight when my 8 year old daughter (her English is not so great, Japanese mother tongue and all) taps me on the elbow. “Papa. Oh sheet.” Puzzled, I’m like, “What’s that sweetie?” She points where I had dropped a piece of chicken on the floor. Light bulb moment. “Oh, shit. She’s been picking up my English.”
Awwww.
When my grandson (5 yo) was over last weekend my wife and I overheard him say “Stop it! Goddamned dog!” while he was playing alone in the adjacent room. I received a stern talking to.
Hillary really was the most qualified progressive ever. Even Wilson couldn’t bring back slavery.
http://www.ibtimes.co.uk/migrants-are-being-sold-open-slave-markets-libya-1616492
I need to go to Libya. My supply of nubile concubines and viable orphans is critically low.
…are they hot? Like, scale of 10, are we talking 7 or above? Asking for a friend.
3…
three 3s = 9
What the hell is that? Is that supposed to be something new? Is it news? News to who? That shit has been going on for millennia.
And it aint just in Libya. It happens all over the ME.
Black beans, rice, Brazilian vinaigrette, beef, and farofa. I get this a lot for lunch, great stuff.
What’s a Brazilian Vinaigrette?
Is it like a regular vinaigrette, but in a smaller bikini?
I was going to say ‘how many ounces of vinaigrette? A brazilian!’
How many zeros in a Brazilian?
I don’t make it so so not know the difference, wife does, but if you google it, you’ll see.
I’m all for a cooking thread. Libertarians seem to take pride in their cooking skills.
But….
A post about a can of beans?????
Fun fact. I was taking care of too many things in the kitchen last night and completely forgot to actually *cook* the garbanzo beans before I made hummus. Couldn’t figure out why the texture was so off-putting until this morning. Actually everything I prepared last night came out kind of bleh.
You don’t like extra-crunchy hummus??
The best part is that it was still better than some of the store bought I’ve had. Oh well, at least garbanzo beans are 60 cents a pound or something stupid like that, so wasting a cup of them isn’t big deal.
*lights the hummus cult signal*
I’m doing the Jello post next week: It’s going to be GREAT!
Canned or fresh?
Fresh, of course. Also, chunks of pinapple and/or peach.
Pineapple.
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/7a/d4/7f/7ad47f9c7ea9528d86fa83945327db1f.jpg
From Lilek’s Gallery of Regrettable Food?
That’s yummy. I can almost taste the lime flavor interacting with fresh pineapple.
Kidney beans.
Only if it’s grilled. Gotta invite as much flavour to the party as you can.
I think to be properly redneck it needs some gumdrops in there.
Do you cut the feet off yourself?
The ridges make the cranberry sauce taste better.
Just so long as it’s better than Lilek’s Jello recipes.
“A post about a can of beans?????”
Around here any subject whatsoever can spark a lively conversation or a vicious argument.
Heh!
Or, Hey!
I make my chili with pork country style ribs and black beans (and whatever else strikes my fancy). Sometimes, I’ll put some left over chili in a small skillet and drop a couple of eggs on top to steam/poach for breakfast. Delicious.
I’ll second the black bean soup. I mash about half the beans to thicken the soup up. Super easy, tastes good, and it can stand nicely as either a full meal or alongside a main course depending on what else you put in it.
Take a shitload of bacon grease. Get it hot. Dump in a can of black beans. Mash. Eat with some real food and you almost have a meal.
Wife made some soup yesterday out of some sort of squash she bought. By itself it’s meh, but she made something with beef on the side, I can only describe it as dry crispy strings of beef. You drop that on top the soup (it’s thick), along with some diced green onions, and then drizzle it with cayenne pepper sauce. Yummy.
I was served squash soup at Thanksgiving a few years ago. I hate squash, but this place was fancy, so I gave it a shot.
It had shitloads of butter and MSG, so it was ok I guess.
No butter or MSG, just squash, a little olive oil, salt, beef, onions, and cayenne pepper sauce.
^This^
Butternut is the only squash suitable for making soup.
Makes a great squash ragout, too (better than pumpkin, IMNSHO).
When we moved to Virginia when I was a kid, my mom became obsessed with colonial everything. She bought a Williamsburg cookbook and started making peanut soup every Thanksgiving. I fucking love that stuff but my wife can’t stand it.
One of my aunts used to make peanut soup every Thanksgiving until enough family passive-aggressively complained. I won’t swear to it but I think the problem was that she started using like Jiff or something towards the end.
Since food is the topic, and my googling finger is tired, I’ll ask:
Is there an appreciable difference in the protein content of grains? To wit- rice vs wheat vs oats vs barley, et c? What’s best?
Quinoa.
Gawd that shit is horrible.
I thought all of the grains are almost totally carbs.
No. And plant protein is useless anyway unless you go to the trouble to combine foods to get all the amino acids. Get some unflavored bulk whey concentrate and eat some eggs if you want more protein.
The body don’t like the plant proteins as much, either. Animal proteins are much more efficient.
Pasty, feeble, funny smelling vegetarians disagree.
Quinoa and spelt have more protein than most grains
Millet and wheat have about 2 times the protein pound for pound than rice and about 3x that of corn, but as our esteemed dungeon weightlifting morlock says, you still need other food in your diet to release the full benefit of amino acids etc.
What’s best?
A variety. Also throw in buckwheat to add lysine an essential amino acid that is underrepresented in actual grains.
Buckwheat says “Tanks a lot!”
Meh, I thought this would link back to one of Eddie Murphy’s SNL skits..
I don’t take requests
“What’s best?”
Pork, but beef, lamb, or dark chicken will do.
If you want plant based protein lentils are an excellent way to go. Easy to cook and very tasty.
Tasty as dirty socks. Blech!
Only if you forget to wash them. You forgot to wash them, didn’t you?
You can also buy some high potency amino tablets from GNC, grind about 10 of them up with your mortar and pestle and put in a protein shake.
Costco day old rotisserie chicken. 16 pieces for 4.95.
Way more protein than wheat or rice.
As I expected. Thx!
I’ll just say no, when quinoa is involved.
Instead, just chew up a bunch of amaranth seeds. Or better, don’t do either of those things.
I’m actually going to make beans for lunch today.
Sun Vista pinto, giant can. Drain, rinse, add bacon, broth, and 2 cups chunky pico de gallo.
Served with flank steak nachos.
Everyone is happy. Even the little jerk.
No, thanks. They just make me fart.
Because I feel like kicking sand on The Other Site….their AM links received 125 comments. None of today’s other posts received more than 44. The cooking post here now has 164.
“The Oxford Comma” is on track to beat that too, with 120 comments and about 6 commenters still racking up the posts. I know it’s not like we’re in a contest or anything, but it is rather … interesting.
I thought we were calling this the “can of beans” post.
By the way, Number 6- I really appreciated your analysis of the “nerve gas airstrike” the other day. I really had not examined the circumstances closely. It’s always good to see a critical (reasoned) look at these media freakouts.
Thanks! *farts in playa’s direction*