Jeez, what a long weekend. Unless, of course, you’re on the Houston Astros. Then it flew by as you beat the piss out of everyone on your schedule.  Or if you’re Takumo Sato.  And as for the hockey. well the Stanley Cup Finals game 1 was an eclectic mix of slow play, luck, soft checks…and a Penguins (inexplicable) victory.  Seriously, did Mario Lemieux make a deal with the devil?

OK, that’s out of the way and we can get into the political, the personal and the perverted (hopefully).  Let’s dive right into…the links!

Eldrick Woods had a bad day

Damn, dude. Call an Uber. (This doesn’t count as a sports story since he’s not been an athlete in years. And seriously, how fucking dumb do you have to be to be worth nearly a billion dollars and get a DUI in your gated neighborhood of homes worth tens of millions by the police department who you probably pay enough in property taxes to fund annually?) I’m no caddy, but I say he should have used a driver.

The artist version of a cripple fight is going on right now. Read it for yourself.

Lefty mayor social signals after nutball affiliated as much with BernieBros as he was with the “alt-right” goes off his meds and gets stabby.  Hey, asshole. The First Amendment doesn’t say what you think it says.

When modern environmentalism runs into the adamantium wall that is modern technology. At least they came up with an experiment that could lead to hilarity. Or porn.

Protesters shutting down Texas House session

Texas Rep calls ICE on protesters disrupting session. Oh, it didn’t end there.  In fact, that’s when shit got real! No word yet if the South Korean parliament is planning on sending advisers over on how to do a proper legislative brawl.

After that last link, I’m thinking this could be refreshed with just a name change for the city. Although there probably isn’t a modern band that could pull it off.

That’s it, dear friends. Welcome back to the work week. Go out there and hit that feeder bar.