There’s a character in the Jew Bible who ought to be better known among libertarians, yclept Adoniram (alternately Adoram). He only makes a couple of appearances, but they’re significant. Interestingly, he’s far better known among Masons and Mormons (and the latter is certainly a result of the former) than among the more common religious folk.
Adoniram (the name translates to “my lord has exalted”) makes his first appearance in 2 Samuel as a functionary for King David:
Now Joab was over all the host of Israel: and Benaiah the son of Jehoiada was over the Cherethites and over the Pelethites, and Adoniram was over the tribute, and Jehoshaphat the son of Ahilud was recorder…
He shows up next in 1 Kings, this time working for Solomon, who was king following David’s death:
And Ahishar was over the household, and Adoniram the son of Abda was over the tribute.
And his job for Solomon?
And king Solomon raised a levy out of all Israel; and the levy was thirty thousand men. And he sent them to Lebanon, ten thousand a month by courses: a month they were in Lebanon, and two months at home: and Adoniram was over the levy.
Solomon eventually croaked, but in the manner of civil service since ancient times, Adoniram stayed on working for the next administration, under Rehoboam.
But as for the children of Israel which dwelt in the cities of Judah, Rehoboam reigned over them. Then king Rehoboam sent Adoniram, who was over the tribute…
So, to recap: Adoniram was in charge of collecting taxes in the form of money, goods, and involuntary servitude. Like any career civil servant, he lasted through multiple administrations and did their dirty work. What a hero! I’m sure that the Children of Israel were grateful for his efforts and paid a munificent public-sector pension.
…and all Israel stoned him with stones, that he died. Therefore king Rehoboam made speed to get him up to his chariot, to flee to Jerusalem. So Israel rebelled against the house of David unto this day.
OK, not so grateful. They killed him and chased away the king. But hey, this is one of the Bible stories that truly has a happy ending. And we can now understand why Adoniram is a heroic figure for the Mormons, who place great importance on coughing up money and labor for the Temple. The rest of us can look upon this as a lesson on the proper respect due to tax collectors and Selective Service officials, and how public sector pension obligations might be mitigated.
Sometimes I’m proud to be a Jew. This is one of those times.
Comments
126 responses to “Jewsday Tuesday: Abbreviated Version”
But hey, this is one of the Bible stories that truly has a happy ending
That is a happy ending, but I’d like to hear more about King Solomon’s harem. Did Adoniram have a part to play in selecting women for the harem?
i do like a good stoning.
Everybody must get stoned.
Missing link for you.
Thanks. Too lazy.
I have had a few good stoning in my day but seem to have gotten away from it as I grow older.
Especially when it’s tax collectors. Or better yet, politicians.
Don’t you people trick or treat?… Just realized saying you people on this article could be taken the wrong way.
I just assumed you meant slave-owning cis shitlords which I considered a compliment.
Good because that’s what I meant.
In our village, Trick or Treat was decreed to occur last Sunday afternoon. It was nice and sunny, and the milfage accompanying the kids was impressive. Almost impressive enough to distract me from those sexy, sexy kids in costumes.
We actually spent the evening hiding at the bar like we do every year.
I did that earlier tonight. The Kilt Girls at the local Tilted Kilt were in costume. Very nice. As a bonus, Founders Porter was on tap.
Score!
Founders makes great beer. We have a Tilted Kilt cross town. First time I went, super hot girls. Last time I went which was at least 20 minutes out of my way at the time, it was dudes behind the bar. I was not happy.
Were they at least kilted?
The guys behind the bar and the guys busing tables wear kilts. Eye candy for the women customers.
And presumably gay dudes as well.
Yes, they had kilts on which was totally wasted on me and I’m assuming most people there.
A bi ex of mine was always enthusiastic about the Tilted Kilt in his neck of the woods. I’d console myself with the not-that-great mancandy while he got doted on by buxom lasses who thought it was cute that a gay couple was there on a date.
Bi guys get all the luck…
Hockey game is on. Most of the kids are already through.
Having high school age kids, I do miss the old days of walking the neighborhood with some of the other dads. We would have a beer cooler in the wagon and a lot of the neighbors had treats for the adults.
I’m more productive on November 1 these days, though.
Rangers losing to the Golden Nuggets and their 4th-string goalie after they got pounded by the Islanders last night. Their 5th-string goalie is on the bench and one of the Ranger announcers said he’s “dressed up for Halloween as a nine-year-old” LOL
LV is kind of fun. I liked their drafts, but I’m surprised they are as strong as they have been.
Their offense is making us look like amateurs. Well, as much as every other team’s.
Rangers… win? *blinks*
All it does is prolong the misery that is Alain Vigneault’s reign of error.
Another day, another delicious batch of shakshuka. This time with a kiss of ?sugar and another diced poblano.
Nice:)
Damn!
That moment when your grandparents rock harder than you.
My kids used to call my Classic Rock Daddy music. When they got older, all my CD’s disappeared so now I’m left with empty CD sleeves: (
AC fucking DC!!!!!
See, you can still listen to and enjoy AC DC. Give this EDM shit 20 or 30 years and I doubt it will still be enjoyable as its fans think it is now.
OT: Day 1 of renovations is off to a rocky start. Pulled out one bathroom light to replace with an exhaust fan and found three cables feeding into it and no separate power feeding into the switch. Had not seen that before, but learned how to wire a switch line. As we traced the wires back though, I found that one of those cables were actually two that had been spliced into one cable behind the wall. The previous homeowners built house and I give them credit for their carpentry but their electrical is horrible. Earlier I had caught a 120 volt 15 amp outlet pig-tailed off the 240 volt range.
Wall and wiring are now both torn out and I had to spend my afternoon rewiring everything. Not fun when you are just anticipating swapping out the light receptacles and maybe running one more cable to the switch for the new exhaust fan. For anyone planning electrical projects, these new push-in wire connectors are worth their weight in gold, especially in tight spots.
I tried explaining to my wife how I saved the house from burning down. She interrupts my chest thumping to ask what the plan is for the 2 square feet of old wall paper that was missed being removed on another wall. Oh well.
Sorry your mansplanning didn’t go over better.
It’s alright. I’m going to try mansplanning twice as hard next time and see if that helps.
Yo, I saw a bunch of your messages the other day in the spam box. We’re not sure why the auto-spam-guard gets super aggressive sometimes, but shoot us an email if it happens to you (ether generic commenter you or Spartan Dad specific you) and we’ll try to fix it.
Thanks, I think it was the link I tried embedding. It went through after I changed to a different one. I had copied and pasted after the first disappearance but didn’t mean to flood the spam box while troubleshooting how to fix it.
How reliable are those push in connectors? Our house was homebuilt and I’ve been replacing the original stab in switches and receptacles with convention screw down versions. I’ve always been leery of those types in the past.
They aren’t like the stab ins and I think they are actually more reliable than traditional wire nuts. You can hear and feel a click once the wires have been secured and also see them in the connector window.
In theory, secured wires are supposed to be able to be removed by twisting and pulling a certain way, but I needed to use pliers in my tests to get them loose without using more than a moderate amount of effort. That made them good enough for me.
Nice. Sounds like winners.
It’s Halloween. If you’d dressed up as Facts of Life Era George Clooney, she would have hung on your every word.
yclept Adoniram. Dry cleptomania.
yclept Adoniram was my nickname in preschool
You got stoned in preschool. Hardcore, man.
Great story. I always liked the Rehoboam story. When the Jews bitched about his Dad’s crazy tax and spend policies, Rehoboam told them he would just prog harder. That’s when the Jews rebelled and turned Adoniram into a good tax collector.
God pretty much told Israel (“the Northern tribes”) to rebel. If I remember the story right, He promised Jereboam that he would have a dynasty to rival David’s, as long as he didn’t engage in idol worship.
Jereboam engaged in idol worship, so he didn’t get his dynasty.
Can I make a self-hating Jew joke?
After that story… sure.
“My self-hating Jew grandpa died in Auschwitz. It’s the way he’d have wanted to go.”
I just got back from trick or treating with my kid and her friends and I must say, I’m disgusted. One child, a WHITE child, was dressed as Pocahontas in a sickening display of cultural appropriation. Two other children were dressed as police officers, a violent act towards all PoC who saw them.
Where do I register my complaint?
A seasonal personal favorite Just ‘cuz.
Sorry, Zevon is the only true of that song.
And this song:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6s5Kjw5BEQ
^^^ This guy fucking GETS IT!!! ^^^
Why would anyone do that to a good song?
I listened to it 3 times trying to understand what was going on. It sounds like Bob Marley, David Byrne, and Huey Lewis got together with the intention of destroying a Warren Zevon song. I’m not against cover tunes being tweaked to fit the covering band’s style, but this is barely recognizable…and not in a good way.
But hey. That’s just like, my opinion, man.
I will give the lead singer credit for one thing; he was great in that movie with Cher.
Harsh. And rightfully so.
Out of all of the horrible defenses given to me for that racist anti-Gillespie commercial, this might be the worst one that I’ve read so far:
“I wholeheartedly reject racist voters needed any more priming in Virginia. This ad very useful with low propensity Dem inclined voters.” – @JeffHauser
Holy shit. First time I’ve seen that ad. That made me feel truly sick.
How immoral, depraved, and racist do members of the radical and mainstream left have to be to watch that commercial, sit down, think about it, and then make an argument that “this will be useful way to get out those low-turnout brown people”? No wonder why the KKK used to love the Democratic Party.
Also, “This ad very useful with low propensity Dem inclined voters.” I don’t get it. Is this English?
What he means is that this ad will get the black and brown voters to come to the polls. Because black and brown voters are stupid and don’t vote unless they’re told that the Republicans are going to murder them.
So he’s saying they’re lazy and selfish therefore the only way to get them to vote is to threatened them with death. Now I get it.
That’s exactly what they’re saying.
IRS Agent: “see, see! We’re the ones who are persecuted! Even (((they))) hate us!”
OT: my very not-Hispanic mother dressed up her Chihuahua with a sombrero and poncho. Racist or no? It is really hilarious to me in today’s context.
No trick or treaters here. One of the many nice things in a semi-rural area.
Wife made pork chops with creamed mushrooms for dinner. For any one with BritBox, they have Hammer House of Horror available.
The PAC that came out with that ad, the Latino Victory Fund, released this statement today. They didn’t actually apologize, but rather they doubled down:
“We knew our ad would ruffle feathers. We held a mirror up to the Republican Party, and they don’t like what they see. We have decided to pull our ad at this time,” said Cristobal J. Alex, President of Latino Victory Fund. “Given recent events, we will be placing other powerful ads into rotation that highlight the reasons we need to elect progressive leaders in Virginia.”
Good, good. Let the hate floooowwwww.
The GOP should tweet their thanks.
The GOP will probably defense will be, “We’re sorry. We don’t do that anymore.”
If this is truly representative of what the Democrats have learned in the past year, Trump is going to win 45 states in 2020.
I don’t think that the Left has actually learned anything from last year. Remember, Cankles won Virginia last year by 5 points. If the base was able to shut up for the year and didn’t say a word, they probably would win this seat in a landslide because no conservative gets all that excited by voting for an establishment R unless they’re provoked. Well guess what, now you’ve provoked them.
Yeah, but this is also a chance for the Dems to send a message. It’s why VA has tended to go against the year old POTUS.
But VA is just a blue state at this point. The .gov workers in NoVA are basically playing Chicago to the rest of the states Illinois. Gillispie might make a decent race of it, but the numbers advantage of the parasite class in Fairfax and Loudon just swamps it IMO.
Although I would love it if that repugnant ad killed their campaign.
It also seems like the #resist message hasn’t exactly been effective at exciting the minority vote, however, if the recent ads from the campaign are to be believed. What helped Clinton to win VA last year came from multiple factors:
1. Tim Kaine was on the ticket. (which adds 2-3% to the margin on average)
2. The energized & wealthy NoVA liberal class, w/ the NeverTrumper political class either not showing up or not voting for the presidential ticket.
3. The minority vote in both NoVa, Central Virginia, and the Tidewater region.
If the NeverTrumpers are more open to voting for Gillespie than Trump, which clearly seems to be the case, and the minority voters are not as enthused to show up at the polls, it is very possible that an ad like that can blow the race wide open. And the recent polls have been extremely close, too (except from Quinnipiac).
The NeverTrumpers didn’t go away though, and this is the only way for them to rebuke the Orange One. I think they come out and vote, and I think the bureaucrats come out and vote, and I especially think the left is going to make sure as many votes as needed are cast, even if they need to turn out every cemetary.
Of course, it could be that the shy Trump voter effect carries over to Ed. We will see.
Rest assured, if Ed does win, the NeverTrumpers will be there to explain it was because of him being Establishment Ed, and if he loses it will be because he appealed to Trump voters.
I always thought that NeverTrump was a movement because Trump wasn’t “conservative enough” for them, or at least that’s what the pundit class said. How would voting for a gun-grabbing leftist do anything but harm that pursuit?
Any ideas on how many NeverTrumpers there were and now are? I wouldn’t be surprised if a lot of people have moved towards supporting him that previously wouldn’t consider it (me, for instance).
NeverTrumpers claim to want all these wonderfully conservative policies, but when they actually have the chance to push them through, they find reasons not to.
NeverTrumpers think John McCain is a statesman, and that Mitt Romney would have been a fine President.
Two major things IMO is saving Ed’s campaign:
1. Corey Stewart got within one point of beating him. That got his campaign to look inward, and he realized that protecting Confederate monuments and being against illegal immigration were two very popular positions with both the base and the general public.
2. The Mainstream Democrats have been moving left at an incredibly rapid rate, and they’re eating their own and turning off any possibly sympathetic moderate.
Ed has a good chance to win. He really does.
Evan McMuffin got 54,000 votes in Virginia, so there are at least that many Never Trumpers out there.
Trump is truly amazing – destroying two political parties in one campaign. Who knew the Democrats would look at the Republican conflagration and say “hold my beer”?
Can’t be seen enough
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=1&v=wVckRJvuBQY
(ht to Tundra in the afternoon links)
Hmmm… I might vote.
Please do, I want yearly Screaming At The Sky Days in NoVA!
Apparently she’s tired of being an actress
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/latino/eva-longoria-launches-latino-victory-project-latino-pac-n97181
And the other co-founder, currently DNC finance chair. Just another fringe organization with no ties to anyone… yeah right.
https://www.democrats.org/person/henry-r.-munoz-iii
Eat it up Democrats, you made this shit sandwich.
“Racist tool” has a lot more cachet.
Hey Cristobal, fuck you.
Crap. Posted in the wrong thread.
You know who else left Germany for S. America at the end of WWII?
Satan?
That sounds totally legit to me.
Right? The whole thing sounds like a bad novel.
Don Francisco?
No, Students Protesting Mike Cernovich Didn’t March With A “No Pedo Bashing” Sign
“A lot of these protesters are aware of the fact that this is an alt-right tactic, so it didn’t take them long at all to figure out what’s going on,” he said.
Sounds like trolling, but I wouldn’t give these protesters too much credit for knowing what’s going on.
Wow, a leftist accuses an embarrassing sympathizer of being a false flag. What a new and shocking development.
Boy next door.
The L’il Terrorist kit that ISIS must be handing out is a nice touch – notes in Arabic, check. ISIS flag, check…
Watching BBC. They just said they don’t have any indication this is part of a wider trend.
Really? None at all?
This shit is getting me really mad watching the coverage.
I’m surprised he’s not dead yet.
If I were the cops there I’d be making sure no one was able to harm him. I’d want every piece of information he has to offer.
This. I’m glad for once we got one alive.
I don’t think BBC could repeat “lone wolf attacker” too many more times before that’s all they’re saying.
Now where did I leave my shocked face?
Similar mug-shot – I have no idea where St. Charles County is or what he did there.
That story can’t be true. They mentioned a hijab, and since we all know Islam is the religion of peace they’re just making it up as a hit piece.
Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but you’re all doomed.
https://relevantmagazine.com/current/porn-addiction-now-threatening-entire-generation
Yes, it’s all the pornography’s fault that men are foregoing or delaying marriage and child-rearing. It’s not like we have a feminist-controlled family court system that has turned marriage into a monetary bonanza for women and the financial/legal equivalent of castration for men.
More Colorado koolaid tonight, leaded instead of unleaded. It’s one of those days; y’know when angry loners like myself want to be specially angry to scare off all the happy families. Y’all understand.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A3DQJKcFik8&index=24&list=RDEMRDrhDBv7g5VJA7vBZM1bjg
And… in the only game that actually mattered today, an incredibly incompetent NY team folds like a house of cards. Losers.
I couldn’t believe that! Another leg to go though so don’t give up hope.
They will have to come up with something pretty spectacular to overcome that shit-show. Nine days off and you’re throwing elbows and playing Keystone Kops in front of goal? And any offense not named David Villa is completely absent? Disgraceful.
The did get that away goal which could really matter. Johnson made a meal of two of those goals though, should really have been 2-1 if he had done his job.
They all sucked. Once again proving that David Villa can’t carry the team by himself.
NERDS
Nick Kristof knows how to find the silver lining in any situation:
Good thing none of those people killed or injured could defend themselves either.
I saw an abc clip that had the man on the street talking about how awesome it was that “the police are literally everywhere, waiting for this.”
That’s not a direct quote, but it’s close enough.
Judith Miller (yes, that one) has an opinion piece on Fox News with pretty much the same thing- hurrah for the NYPD, it could have been worse!
Heard he lived in Florida, so it’s kind of a moot point.
He actually lived in Paterson, New Jersey. Where you can of course buy semi-automatic AR-15 type rifles. So Kristof is an idiot.
So that Virginia ad. Did Reason love it? Because we all know the left loves cosmotarians.
So has Jeffrey Tucker endorsed Hillary for being a crook? He does think corrupt polticians make us freer. I mean Latin America is such a libertarian paradise. And American politicians are too honest and selfless.
Also corrupt politicians want to leave us alone. I mean Chicago is such a libertarian paradise.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0pA8QP9AGE4
Happy Halloween!
A little creepy Klaus Kinski for anyone still up…
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=KN3VEoeHRZk