Red Sox catching prospect dies of cancer at 17. Rick Pitino knew of bribery scandal, according to the indictment (and to nobody’s surprise). LaVarr Ball still unavailable for comment. Jerry Jones is going to the mat over Roger Goodell’s contract extension (and rightfully so with the bullshit way the commissioner has handled the Zeke Elliott “situation”). And some meaningful international soccer will be played today…which doesn’t include the USMNT’s game, obviously.

Have you seen my baseball football?

Only three games on the slate in the NHL last night.  The Lightning shocked the Sharks. The Maple Leafs went wild on Minnesoda. And the Rangers topped the Bruins in an original six matchup.

That’s it for sports. Now on to…the links!

Dianne Feinstein, who has armed bodyguards, tells Congress to start banning guns from the hoi polloi. In a show of force abject stupidity, 22 other Democrat Senators joined her in calling for a weapons ban on scary-looking guns that are no different that their less-scary-looking counterparts.  Hey Dianne: FUUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUUUU.

But I want impeachment NOW!

Lol, what a bunch of pussies. I hope they all got that out of their system…at least until the anniversary of the inauguration, which I’m sure they’ll use to reenact another protest. Hopefully they don’t torch any more immigrant-owned limousines or bust out the windows of any more businesses.

Dayyum! Ridley Scott to airbrush Kevin Spacey out of $40M film in which he was the star. The movie was set to release in just six weeks but the timetable is up in the air as Christopher Plummer is set to assume the role.

Sticking with there sexual assault theme, Trip Advisor decides to open themselves up for lawsuits. This might seem like a good idea in thought, but in practice, saying sexual assaults happen at a hotel or resort might have an impact on their bottom line. And that might cause them to sue you if the allegations turn out to be untrue.

Chicago Public Schools flexes their muscles, has principal reinstated. This on the heels of a scathing report by the school system’s Inspector General that chronicled doctored records by the principal in order to bolster her school’s statistics.  They did their own report, which took considerably less time, which completely exonerated her.  I know it’s shocking, but when you think about it, its not hard to do when you know the result you want and work backward.  This is just the latest in a running feud between the powerful school system and the office tasked with making sure they’re doing things right (which they’re not).

Crazy. As. Shit.

Bunny boilers?  How about a ferret roaster? Definitely would not.

Government sues pile of cash (literally). If you’re confused about how civil forfeiture works, this story is a decent primer on it.

Adios, pendejo! Sorry for your bullshit World Court claims. If you come here, you’re going to be subject to our laws and the penalties that go with them. Fuck you. Enjoy hell.

You’re gonna get a song today. So just simmer down.

Hope each and every one of you have a great day.