Thursday Morning Links

Red Sox catching prospect dies of cancer at 17. Rick Pitino knew of bribery scandal, according to the indictment (and to nobody’s surprise). LaVarr Ball still unavailable for comment. Jerry Jones is going to the mat over Roger Goodell’s contract extension (and rightfully so with the bullshit way the commissioner has handled the Zeke Elliott “situation”). And some meaningful international soccer will be played today…which doesn’t include the USMNT’s game, obviously.

Have you seen my baseball football?

Only three games on the slate in the NHL last night.  The Lightning shocked the Sharks. The Maple Leafs went wild on Minnesoda. And the Rangers topped the Bruins in an original six matchup.

That’s it for sports. Now on to…the links!

Dianne Feinstein, who has armed bodyguards, tells Congress to start banning guns from the hoi polloi. In a show of force abject stupidity, 22 other Democrat Senators joined her in calling for a weapons ban on scary-looking guns that are no different that their less-scary-looking counterparts.  Hey Dianne: FUUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUUUU.

But I want impeachment NOW!

Lol, what a bunch of pussies. I hope they all got that out of their system…at least until the anniversary of the inauguration, which I’m sure they’ll use to reenact another protest. Hopefully they don’t torch any more immigrant-owned limousines or bust out the windows of any more businesses.

Dayyum! Ridley Scott to airbrush Kevin Spacey out of $40M film in which he was the star. The movie was set to release in just six weeks but the timetable is up in the air as Christopher Plummer is set to assume the role.

Sticking with there sexual assault theme, Trip Advisor decides to open themselves up for lawsuits. This might seem like a good idea in thought, but in practice, saying sexual assaults happen at a hotel or resort might have an impact on their bottom line. And that might cause them to sue you if the allegations turn out to be untrue.

Chicago Public Schools flexes their muscles, has principal reinstated. This on the heels of a scathing report by the school system’s Inspector General that chronicled doctored records by the principal in order to bolster her school’s statistics.  They did their own report, which took considerably less time, which completely exonerated her.  I know it’s shocking, but when you think about it, its not hard to do when you know the result you want and work backward.  This is just the latest in a running feud between the powerful school system and the office tasked with making sure they’re doing things right (which they’re not).

Crazy. As. Shit.

Bunny boilers?  How about a ferret roaster? Definitely would not.

Government sues pile of cash (literally). If you’re confused about how civil forfeiture works, this story is a decent primer on it.

Adios, pendejo! Sorry for your bullshit World Court claims. If you come here, you’re going to be subject to our laws and the penalties that go with them. Fuck you. Enjoy hell.

You’re gonna get a song today. So just simmer down.

Hope each and every one of you have a great day.

Comments

649 responses to “Thursday Morning Links”

  1. Suthenboy

    Not only does Feinstein have armed bodyguards, she has a personal concealed carry permit.

    Screaming ‘fuck you’ at her is too nice.

    1. Yeah, and how many people from her county are even issued one? Well, how many people that aren’t political heavyweights or former police officers?

      She’s in the top 10 of worst human beings to ever be elected in the United States.

      1. Suthenboy

        “That’s different” – Charlie Rangle

      2. straffinrun

        the Automatic Gunfire Prevention Act

        Keep those guns from firing on their own.

        1. Gustave Lytton

          It’s more like spontaneous ignition. “There weren’t any firearms or ammunition nearby but somehow automatic gunfire appeared just like that!”

  2. The Late P Brooks

    I screamed at the sky, but it kept right on snowing.

    1. MikeS

      White dominance claims another victim.

      1. Microaggressor

        Snow is the White People of weather.

    2. Gustave Lytton

      Stop screaming “The snow god is a pussy!” when you do that.

  3. Caught the morning links for a change right before I head to Richmond – Review this week. Hilarious live-action adaptation of Asterix. Highly recommended if you can view Region 2 discs. Monica Bellucci in this one is stunning (when is she not?…..I haven’t seen Irreversible).

    1. Also reposting my promo for Virginia Film Festival this weekend – anyone looking to check out some different stuff – check out the list of flicks I linked to – some pretty cool options…and some I wouldn’t touch with a 10 foot pole. https://youtu.be/TWwUZurSNx4

      1. I thought RIFF was their big event. There’s another one?

        1. Not sure….I think I just missed it when I moved here last year. This one’s mostly sponsored by UVA but half the theaters are downtown.

    2. Count Potato

      Irreversible is an excellent film, but isn’t easy to watch.

      1. Galt1138

        That’s putting it mildly. I had to watch the first 15 – 20 minutes from my peripheral vision because of the camera work, not the violence (which is brutally realistic).

    3. BakedPenguin

      Huh. When is the Tintin film coming out?

  4. straffinrun

    Based on news reports as well as comments from the TripAdvisor community, the warnings are designed to identify health, safety and discrimination issues in all of the website’s travel categories

    ✊✊??

    1. Mustang

      That may be one of the dumbest things I’ve seen a business do in a while.

      So, what, the hotels are responsible for preventing sexual assault?

      Just you wait, they’ll introduce a bill mandating the desk clerk gives a sexual assault briefing to every guest.

      1. straffinrun

        WordPress changed those fists from black to yellow.

        1. Mustang

          Lego Lives Matter.

        2. Bobarian LMD

          Black fists matter?

        3. The Sleeper

          D’oh!

      2. MikeS

        mandating the desk clerk gives a sexual assault briefing to every guest.

        STEVE SMITH FIFY

      3. ChipsnSalsa

        The government thinks hotels are responsible for preventing drug deals on their property as well.

      4. Slammer

        Can’t they just Leave the Light on for You?

        1. Bobarian LMD

          Slammer likes to watch.

    2. I can’t wait for their response to community organizers that decry their “its in a bad part of town” designations for hotels near shitty neighborhoods.

      1. Just a thought not a sermon

        Yes, this is going to map almost exactly to local crime statistics, providing exactly zero helpful information.

    3. Badolph Hilter

      Well, I can’t see any way that this could possibly be abused.

    1. a feel-god story

      Sounds like the intruder is feeling God today. Or the devil.

    2. Drake

      Feel-good.

      The intruder might have had a meeting with God.

      1. tarran

        Taking the room temperature challenge.

    3. Suthenboy

      I posted this last night. I didn’t get the story straight at first. I am acquainted with Lee Ray, a fine fellow. He and his wife have run that store for decades. Turns out the clerk was not Lee Ray himself, but no matter.

      http://www.kalb.com/content/news/Exclusive-video-Lee-Rays-owner-releases-surveillance-video-of-attempted-robbery-455949883.html

      This shit happens All. The. Time. and the media buries these stories. A good guy with a gun by some estimates stop over 1,000,000 crimes per year and yet we rarely hear about it. About 25 years ago I personally stopped a car jacking. I know two other….well, three now…people who have done the same.

      Fuck the media.

      1. Drake

        Fun to see how fast they ran when shots came their direction.

      2. And of course they treated the pig’s story as the gospel truth.

      3. Stinky Wizzleteats

        Is that a single action Colt style revolver the robber is using? Not the best choice for a modern day robbery.

        1. thepasswordispassword

          It also looked awfully small, possibly .22LR?

        2. wchipperdove

          Nobody needs more than one action, citizen.

  5. The Elite Elite

    Dayyum! Ridley Scott to airbrush Kevin Spacey out of $40M film in which he was the star.

    Wait, this is serious? When I saw this on Twitter I thought it was a joke.

    1. Slammer

      It would be cool to just mosaic him like in Japanese porn

  6. Mustang

    These links seemed more rage-inducing than normal.

    I’d go scream at the sky about Feinstein, but I have a functioning brain.

    1. I just texted Banjos and noted that they were angry links. Which is odd, because I’m in a fine mood today.

      I blame the dysfunctional world, not the loving band of malcontents here at Glibs.

    2. Drake

      This always makes me feel better.

  7. Suthenboy

    People have finally given up trying to convince me that TDS is not a real thing. I have a hard time believing it myself but it is impossible to ignore. How is it that so many people have so much invested in who sits in the White House that they go batshit crazy over Donald Trump? Do they really want the jackboot coming down on their fellow citizens that they disagree with that badly? Scream at the sky you assholes, then go fuck yourself because that is exactly what you are doing: re-electing Donald Trump.

    I can only imagine how badly they are going to go off of the rails when he is re-elected. Are they gonna run Clinton again? That would be beautiful.

    1. Drake

      Do they really want the jackboot coming down on their fellow citizens…?

      Rhetorical question, right?

      1. Suthenboy

        I just find it hard to believe that so many people hate their fellow citizens so badly that they want to punish them in the most severe ways possible. Why? I have never done anything to them and yet they want my rights, all of them, violated and trampled. I have never taken anything from them. I have never harmed them in any way. Is envy, greed and resentment really that bad out there?

        On a fairly regular basis I hear someone calling for ‘shooting NRA members’, ’rounding up deplorables’, ‘jail for hate speech, ‘all white men are racists and/or rapists’, etc etc.

        The left has successfully brainwashed no small number of people into hatred of the greatest country by any measure in the history of the world. It is depraved.

        1. Drake

          Controlling other people is an very old urge – how that act, speak, and think. Islam seems to be built around that desire.

          In the West, it got crazy violent in the French Revolution and only got worse in the 20th Century. I doubt the 21st Century will be any less bloody.

          1. The Last American Hero

            Probably not. Nuclear. Fucking. Weapons.

            And as far as body counts go, I’ll take 2000-2017 over 1900-1917 any day of the week.

          2. antisthenes

            Yeah, about the only thing Marx got right was the tragedy and farce comment, and we’re fortunate to live in the farce part.

        2. Rufus the Monocled

          The progressive movement has no moral or intellectual compass at this point.

          That’s why they project onto libertarians. It’s a little more than bizarre when publications that have little or no history in politics suddenly are publishing political articles – i.e. Cosmopolitan, GQ etc.) where basically the authors don’t advance a particularly intelligent or cogent view point but set out to bully.

          1. Drake

            They never did. It’s a requirement for the condition.

          2. Count Potato

            Everything has become too politicized — sports, fashion, comic books, etc.

          3. Drake

            The French Revolution / Reign of Terror – It happened before. They politicized the church, the calendar, damn near everything in life. And used kangaroo trials and mass murder to enforce their crazy ideas.

        3. Stinky Wizzleteats

          “I just find it hard to believe that so many people hate their fellow citizens so badly that they want to punish them in the most severe ways possible. ”

          You seem to be a nice guy Suthen but I’m afraid you have way too much faith in humanity.

        4. Lackadaisical

          I’m guessing you never lived in the North.

          I feel that people here are true control freaks, really they are indistinguishable from totalitarians, and with all the racial stuff are starting to be as bad as actual nazis… fuck me for godwining, but in my once republican leaning town we just elected someone who pledged to discriminate on the basis of the gender of applicants for town jobs (just the upper echelons, of course- because if we mandated at least half the street sweepers were women it’d be a disaster).

        5. bacon-magic

          We have harmed them by being different then them. Their rhetoric and ideology has led them to this point and they embrace it instead of rightfully rejecting it.

          1. wdalasio

            When I think about it, I think I know the outcome I’d like to see. Spankings. Not rhetorical spankings or the metaphorical equivalent of a spanking. No, I mean a real, literal, honest to God spanking. I’d like to see people start grabbing these little shits, putting them over their knee, pulling their pants down and smacking them on the ass (or even use a belt) ten or fifteen times.

            It’s not like any of them could do a damned thing about it. The people playing this game are invariably incapable of winning an altercation with a fruit fly. And they deserve it. This is the sort of behavior that, when I was growing up, we learned to refrain from out of fear of consequences. Somehow or another, they got it into their heads that it was acceptable and that there were no consequences. Maybe it’s never too late to stop sparing the rod.

            I know if I were a witness, I wouldn’t have seen anything. And if I were a juror, no crime would have been committed.

        6. wdalasio

          I have never done anything to them and yet they want my rights, all of them, violated and trampled. I have never taken anything from them. I have never harmed them in any way. Is envy, greed and resentment really that bad out there?

          Why do bullies ever need and excuse to bully people? They might sometimes convince themselves its about the lunch money or whatever. But, you’ll see them do the bullying even when there’s nothing in it for them. Because when you look at it, the bullying is the goal. Large swaths of an entire generation have been raised to be bullies. Personally impotent ones, but bullies nonetheless. They’ve been told that such behavior was okay. They were told that, as long as you direct your bullying at NRA members, deplorables, or white men, being a bully was not only morally acceptable, but even virtuous. And the truth is, those NRA members, those deplorables, those white men were perfectly safe targets for their bullying. We live in a civilized age. Those NRA members, those deplorables, those white men will all try to reason with them and convince them that their accusations are wrong and don’t make sense. A generation or two ago, the bullies in question would have found themselves gifted a broken jaw or broken nose.

    2. Mustang

      It’s bad enough that I’m a little concerned about what they might do if/when they regain a majority and the presidency, especially if it happens in the near future.

      1. Oh, they’ll tear down every monument to a white guy that might have ever owned a slave. They’ll establish the same kangaroo court system they have on college campuses for “harassment” and other bullshit that they want to criminalize. They’ll make sure to ram another iteration of O-care up our assholes. They’ll subsidize every green energy boondoggle imaginable and they’ll tie our tax dollars to the corruptocrats running the CAGW money laundering scam at the UN. And last but not least, they’ll eviscerate the 4A, 2A and 1A.

        It will be catastrophic for the individual.

        1. Raston Bot

          “eviscerate the 2A”

          and compliance will be maybe 10% which aligns with number of prog gun owners. ha suckers.

        2. Psycho Effer

          It’s going to be the kangaroo court from the Dark Knight Rises.

        1. Rufus the Monocled

          Strong and free my ass.

          We’re all talk and no action.

        2. Lackadaisical

          I’ve been watching Canada with horror for the past few years.

          *rewatches Canadian Bacon*

    3. Akira

      How is it that so many people have so much invested in who sits in the White House that they go batshit crazy over Donald Trump?

      I’m reminded of this time I was looking through a box of old records, and I saw a 33″ of Bobby Vee – Rubber Ball, I Come Bouncing Back To You. On the back, there was a bullet list of trivia about ol’ Bobby… His favorite color, what kind of pet he has, and all kinds of meaningless details. I thought, “Supposing someone actually liked this song, why would they give a shit about all these other details??

      That’s what was going on with Obama. People cling on to every little detail of his life like teenage girls obsessing over pop stars. It’s really creepy how people were just INTO him. He sure knew how to charm people.

      I’m convinced that he had some highly experienced PSYOPS people on his campaign staff. He may be a corrupt shitbag Chicago politician, but his strategy for charming people and inspiring hero-worship was frighteningly effective. I know a lot of intelligent, educated people who just turned into giggling schoolgirls when talking about Obama. They expected Hillary to “carry on his legacy”, and instead, Trump rode into the White House and seems to be taking a shit on it.

      I sure am enjoying the butthurt, in any case.

      1. Raston Bot

        the man was tall, dark, handsome, educated, and charismatic. his policies were horrible but they came wrapped in a shiny box! i’m convinced Gillespie lost so badly b/c he’s a boring, chinless toad. does this theory rely on the electorate being shallow? absolutely.

        1. Psycho Effer

          Gillespie defines GOPe. He has no personality, and I’m convinced that he actually believes in nothing but power for himself. He was handed all the chances by the Demo fuck-ups and he couldn’t cross the finish line. He needs to disappear from politics.

      2. wdalasio

        They fell for him because they wanted to fall for him. He was the magic pill they could swallow to show the world how unracist they were. On top of that he was perhaps the personification of middle-brow cosmopolitan culture. Thus, for a lot of Mr. Obama’s base, he was the means for them to politely assert their belief in their own superiority.

    4. wdalasio

      Do they really want the jackboot coming down on their fellow citizens that they disagree with that badly?

      Dread to say it, but yes. I’d always kind of assumed that people were just kind of stupid and short-sighted, that they wanted freedom for themselves, but couldn’t see that the price of that was granting it to everyone. These days, I’m not so sure. I think a surprisingly large number of people would happily put the shackles on themselves if they thought it would lead to other people being under the same yoke.

    5. thepasswordispassword

      When I was younger and dumber I used to be full prog. There is an earnest belief that people make the wrong decisions and that it makes the world worse for everyone. That to make the world better you need a regime that only allows justified choices. For example only people who actually need them for work should be allowed to own a truck, everyone by default should only be allowed to drive fuel efficient commuter cars. There’s a strain of compulsive rule following there as well. A 1984ish crimestop where they’ll stop at a red light in the middle of nowhere with empty country for miles to see and maybe drive through but feel rather guilty about not waiting for the green. With that kind of mindset the idea of casually, regularly and unremorsefully breaking the law (regardless of morality of said law) is alien and something only a criminal with some sort of pathology would possess.

      When your life experience consists of being rewarded for the correct answer, prioritizing education credentials (grades) and living under a set of arbitrary rules that are somewhat well incentivized with reward and punishment it makes sense. How many progs grew up going to schools where they didn’t feel like they were dealing with petty tyrants and failing teachers but instead fair administrators and knowledgeable instructors?

  8. Drake

    I would assume that Kraft will put the knife in Goodell when he gets the chance. I’ll cheer when he does.

    1. Rufus the Monocled

      If Kraft joins Jones, it’s caput for Goodell I reckon.

    2. The Elite Elite

      This seems like the cheesiest if you ask me.

    3. bacon-magic

      They’ll be eating mac and cheese and smoking cigarettes on the field.

  9. Bobarian LMD

    Have you ever tried roast ferret? It might be good.

    And they’re nasty pets.

    1. ChipsnSalsa

      And let’s also not forget–let’s not forget, Dude–that keeping wildlife, an amphibious rodent, for uh, domestic, you know, within the city–that isn’t legal either.

      1. Suthenboy

        Amphibious rodent? Does that mean slimy rat? If so and that is illegal Washington DC is in deep legal trouble.

        1. straffinrun

          This is what happens when you find a Suthenboy in the Alps.

        2. Suthen, you’re out of your element!

          Just to clarify…

          1. Suthenboy

            *facepalm*

            How did I miss a reference to The Big Lebowski?

          2. antisthenes

            The capital Dude should have been a giveaway.

    2. Count Potato

      “Clifford told police that she cooked the pet as revenge for her roommate stealing clothes.”

      But no mention of the races involved? I thought that was the most important point of any college roommate story?

      1. It’s New Hampshire.

        Think about it.

    3. Manchester, NH – repruhzent!

    4. Damn right. My daughter had two of those meat Slinkies when she was in high school. Smelly.

      1. ChipsnSalsa

        What happens when you cook them in an oven? That apartment is going to stink for years.

  10. Bobarian LMD

    STEVE SMITH HUGE FAN OF TRIP ADVISOR

    LOVE GO ON RAPECATION.

    1. Just a thought not a sermon

      That’s a good point. Some people might not use Trip Advisor the “right way.”

      “Here’s a nice little bed & breakfast. Nine rapes last year!”

    2. straffinrun

      FRONT DESK? STEVE SMITH CHECK OUT AT 9. NEED WAKE UP CALL AT 10.

    3. “RAPECATION”

      *opera applause*

      1. Bobarian LMD

        STEVE LIKE SONG

    4. bacon-magic

      STEVE SMITH LOVE MINT UNDER PILLOW. COLLECTED 5 MINTS SO FAR, GOING FOR MORE.

  11. Just a thought not a sermon

    85) I’ve noticed several clickbait headlines lately related to the Paris Accord on Global Warming. Here’s a typical one: Literally Every Country on Earth But US Is In On Accord

    I’ve come up with a few more of my own that I think capture the same spirit:

    Literally Every Lilliputian Helped Tie Gulliver to the Ground

    Literally Every One of Poland’s Neighbors Dismembered It Gradually

    Literally One US Soldier Killed or Wounded 11 Nazis on 15 August 1944

    Literally Every Black Person in Forsyth County Was Driven Out in 1912

    Literally Every Ballot in Haiti’s Presidential Election Went to Papa Doc Duvalier

    1. ChipsnSalsa

      Literally Every Country on Earth But US Is In On Accord…

      yes they have all signed on because they were going to get money from the US. I have very little doubt that we would have been paying out the nose with that plan.

      1. Suthenboy

        “they have all signed on because they were going to get money from the US.”

        Bingo. I prefer to call it the Paris Theft Accord.

      2. leonadasiv

        It’s easy to join, seen all you have to do is state that ‘you will reduce emissions as soon as emissions have peaked’. That was literally what Pakistan committed to doing. (Trying to stay in theme).

      3. Rufus the Monocled

        Is there an article that specifies the U.S. was going to do it and why were they singled out to give money or did it involve other wealthy nations too?

        It doesn’t surprise me a jerk off like Obama would be on board with that.

        1. ChipsnSalsa

          I’m shooting from the hip on my take.

          1. Rufus the Monocled
    2. Well too bad for those shithole 99%er countries that we are the 1% here in America and while you may think you have some power, this isn’t a global democracy where the majority of you shitbags can vote to legally steal from the wealthy minority.

      So go fuck yourselves. Have a nice day. Try to stay dry when the waters rise.

      1. Lackadaisical

        I love how the left keeps acting like it is a bad thing when we go our own way.

        The latest was on NPR… because Syria (fucking SYRIA) signed up, that means the US is even more diplomatically isolated… right, our good friends on Syria have finally left us out in the cold *eyeroll so massive they fall out of my head*

      2. DesigNate

        I still haven’t gotten a straight answer from these clowns for how this isn’t a treaty that should have been ratified by the senate.

        1. Lackadaisical

          Regarding the ferret being killed in the oven, to be sure it is a disgusting crime, but this stood out to me:

          “To lose a ferret is like losing a kid,” Murray said. “I just can’t believe she did that.”

          No it is not you disgusting piece of filth. I’m really sick of people who think they are ‘fur moms’ or any other such bullshit. Your disgusting flea infested pets are not equivalent to children. I would say “I hope these people never breed”, but I don’t think I have to worry about it.

          1. Zunalter

            -1 Pet Parent

        2. Lackadaisical

          Fucking Gilmore’d again. I’m on a roll.

    3. Akira

      Ah, the old “every other country” canard. I guess they take it as a logical axiom that if every other country does something, the US must do it as well.

      “Every other country provides free, high-quality healthcare for its citizens!”

      “Every other country bans guns for the safety of its people!”

      1. Lackadaisical

        It is like these people never had parents: “If all your friends jump off a cliff, are you going to jump too?”

    4. invisible finger

      Literally Only ONE Country Has Anything To Lose By Signing On To The Paris Accord On Global Warming

      I’m sure in 1939 all the cool German kids were in Hitler Youth.

    5. Raston Bot

      Literally Every Tinpot Dictator on Earth Would Have Received Kickbacks from the US

    6. Psycho Effer

      “Literally Every Lilliputian Helped Tie Gulliver to the Ground”

      This is the point when you replace Gulliver with the U.S.

  12. straffinrun

    “I will not and cannot apologize for someone else’s crime, but, I will be back for justice! You can count on that.”

    Karl! There’s a walker carrying a #CousinRaperLivesMatter sign.

  13. How to attract more women to the tech industry

    The Lisbon convention is one of the most important tech conferences in the world. Each year, around 60,000 developers and 1,200 speakers come to the Web Summit to discuss topics such as artificial intelligence, cryptocurrencies and virtual realities.

    The audition is surprisingly diverse this time around – almost half of all participants are women. That’s unusual for an industry that predominantly attracts men, but the high number is not a coincidence: The organizers set aside 14,000 tickets this year that were made available to female participants at a reduced price.

    This initiative aims to lure more women into the highly innovative tech sector. Even in the US, the hub of technological advances and home to companies such as Facebook, Apple and Uber, the proportion of women in the sector is quite small. According to the study “Girls Who Code,” published by the consulting firm Accenture, women will hold only one in five tech jobs by 2025.

    1. Just a thought not a sermon

      If this is truly a goal our society must have, here’s an idea: Single-sex schools.

      1. Psycho Effer

        The single sex is transgender. Heads explode.

    2. Badolph Hilter

      The Lisbon convention

      Ooooo that sounds — oh wait. Nevermind.

    3. ChipsnSalsa

      having guys dress in floral print shirts as a speaker isn’t going to help.

      1. Don’t “other” Aloha Fridays! I need my casual Fridays! (and yes if that includes sunbathing manatees, so be it). – I mean the actua design on my shirt, not Palm Beach on Tuesday.

          1. Oh thank God for typos. I thought that was gonna be a unibrow reference.

    4. leonadasiv

      I’m surprised a lesbian convention can’t get more women to show up…. Oh Lisbon.

    5. Akira

      I, for one, am disgusted by the gender disparity in STEM occupations in America. But it’s not just STEM occupations; there is an alarmingly low rate of female participation in careers like logging, mining, commercial fishing, and cab driving. We need to fund women’s education initiatives, impose strict anti-harassment laws, and require gender quotas in the hiring process to make things more equal.

      I will pursue this tirelessly, and I won’t rest until more women are having their limbs ripped off by chainsaws, being crushed alive by collapsing mine shafts, falling overboard into icy waters during a storm, or getting their brains blown out all over the windshield by a crack addict at 3 AM.

  14. Tundra

    The Maple Leafs went wild in Minnesoda.

    Probably irrelevant, but the game was in Toronto. The Wild are looking rough. Goalie seems to have forgotten how to get to his posts, the D is softer than a puppy’s belly and the forwards appear to be allergic to the net. No cap space, either.

    I enjoy yelling at the TV though.

    1. The actual venue didn’t help me write a punny comment though.

      1. Tundra

        Sorry. Carry on.

    2. Whatever are you talking about.

      *blinks innocently*

    3. Rufus the Monocled

      AND I HAD TO DROP COYLE IN MY KEEPER POOL.

      I also have to deal with ^@^%#%# Fowler.

      1. bacon-magic

        ^@^%#%# Fowler

        That first part looks like a duck landing.

    4. GSL in E

      Eh. After Leipold signed Suter and Parise to their absurd contracts, and then promptly cried poverty and led the charge to lock the players out in 2012, I’ve enjoyed watching his expensive team fail.

    5. And it really should be Maple Leaves.

      1. BakedPenguin

        You’re just pissed that the Sabres suck. Also, it should be the Sabers, or Buffalo should be ceded to Canada.

  15. Most Dutch men say they don’t cross sex harassment lines

    Roughly 75 percent of adult-aged men in the Netherlands say they have never engaged in any form of sexual misconduct, a new survey conducted by newspaper AD reveals. Over 300 men were questioned in the survey, conducted as six weeks of high profile reporting has detailed sexual abuse and harassment allegations against prominent international and Dutch figures.

    About one of every seven countered said they could not be sure if they did or did not cross a boundary, answering, “I can not be the judge of that.”

    One man replied he has, “no idea when women think you are going too far.” Several others have called the debate a “witch hunt,” the newspaper states.

    Some 47 percent of respondents said the conversation around the topic has become extreme, with some questioning whether or not there is a universal standard that defines sexual harassment.

    1. straffinrun

      with some questioning whether or not there is a universal standard that defines sexual harassment.

      We should form a United Nations Council for this. Put Saudi Arabia as the chair.

      1. Rufus the Monocled

        With Roman Polansrape and Harvey Weinstein as guest of honors

        Sure why not?

        It’s the UN!

        1. MikeS

          STEVE SMITH WOULD BE HONORED TO BE AMBASSADOR

          1. AMBASSADOR AT LARGE, IF YOU KNOW WHAT STEVE SMITH MEAN!

          2. MikeS

            HAHAHAHA! YOU MAKE STEVE SMITH LAUGH!

            *SLAPS SWISS ON BACK; SWISS FLYS 30 FEET THROUGH THE AIR*

          3. F. Stupidity Jr.
          4. MikeS

            STEVE SMITH NO LIKE GRAMMAR NAZIS. STEVE SMITH RAPE YOU EXTRA HARD

          5. bacon-magic

            STEVE SMITH HAVE DIPLOMATIC IMMUNITY. RAPE TIME ALL TIME GET PAID.

      2. Lackadaisical

        No looking at women then… if you do, the punishment is that she gets executed.

    2. Suthenboy

      Didn’t some proggie chick make a video of herself walking around scantily clad in the streets to prove that all men are sexual harassers?
      She tried to hide it when it turned out that all of the men that whistled or commented were minorities and the white guys basically ignored her?
      I think I remember that right.

      1. Just a thought not a sermon

        Yeah, she was in Manhattan. Basically she walked around for eight hours–her total footage was like 7 hours and 40 minutes of no comments, and the 20 minutes of video that she posted with wolf-whistles and comments was when she walked through Harlem.

      2. Count Potato

        I don’t remember her being scantily clad. I do remember extremely selective editing.

      3. Lackadaisical

        She was wearing normal clothes, but you are correct, I think there were 1 or 2 white guys in the footage.

    3. Wow. I’m sure none of them lied.

      1. There are two McDonalds I frequent for ice cream. I can’t recall them ever having their machine go down.

        I guess that’s the benefit of living in a civilized part of the country where there’s a need for ice cream 10 months out of the year at least.

        1. MikeS

          The proper time for eating ice cream is 12 months out of the year.

      2. RBS

        Do you people not have actual ice cream parlors where you live?

        1. You People? triggered.

          1. Private Chipperbot
        2. The Elite Elite

          Ice cream parlor? You mean like Dairy Queen or Coldstone? There’s also Cherry On Top, but that’s frozen yogurt so some of you may or may not count that. (It tastes great too, just not quite as great as ice cream)

          1. I’d rather go local, too. Coldstone is garbage. I get that the slab is really cold, but it still looks like a bacteria haven they slather that shitty gooey ice cream all over. DQ is okay.

            I’m not a big ice cream fan, so I don’t care that much.

        3. ElspethFlashman

          Yes, but everything around here like that closes in October. So we have to wait for re-opening in March. Sigh! Unless I do a drive through at like Steak N Shake I guess. …

        4. Chipwooder

          Sure we do, but considering how often we take the kids out for ice cream, the majority of them are going to be 99 cent McD cones rather than 5 buck cones at Brusters or the gelato place near us. I ain’t made of money!

          1. Zunalter

            gelato…

        5. bacon-magic

          Way to other the poors RBS.
          *eats sugar-free Custard (no it’s not a euphemism)*

    1. Rufus the Monocled

      “Nemo81 6 Dec 2016 14:03

      600
      601
      Well put George.’

      Of course they would on board with this. They’re left-wing. Which means they’re anti-humanist ignoramuses.

      It don’t matter none that McDonald’s serves low-income communities across North America leaving its doors open to them. And I tell you one fucken thing, when I’m travelling on the road there’s not much out there as comforting as McDonald’s. Run in, grab a stupid McMufifn, relax and move on.

      Every single one of those commenters can go fuck themselves – Monbiot first among them. Democracy my fucken ass. Like he gives a shit what other people want. He’s just another piece of shit moron who wants to control; the sort of asshole who screams ‘hate speech’ whenever people disagree with him.

      They”re such malcontented miscreants.

      They just can’t LET IT BE.

    2. McDonalds: The Restroom of America

      About the only time I eat at MDs is when I’m on a road trip and don’t want to spend the time at a sit-down restaurant, or take a chance at “Billy Bob’s BBQ Roadside Jamboree”.

      Going in I know what to expect – bland but I could eat them dern fries all day.

      1. Rufus the Monocled

        Norm ate at a great place. It was called ‘Eat’.

      2. The Elite Elite

        What’s so great about McDonalds fries? Just like everything else on their not breakfast menu, they’re rather average. In-In-Out fries, Carl’s Jr. fries, and Jack-in-the-box fries are all better.

        1. Nephilium

          Really? In-n-Out fries, are tolerable, but mediocre at best. The burgers are the reason to go there, not the fries. And while I haven’t eaten at a McDonald’s since I worked there (many, many years ago), the fries were always good. It’s the double cooking that does it.

          1. The Elite Elite

            Yeah, In-In-Out fries aren’t amazing, but they’re better than McDonald’s if you ask me. (They are amazing when you order Animal Fries, though)

          2. Gustave Lytton

            McDonald’s fries have gone downhill since they switched out there oil.

          3. Zunalter

            No more beef tallow was the last nail in the coffin for me.

        2. Chipwooder

          For one thing, we don’t have any of those around here. For another, I’m assuming Carl’s Jr fries are the same as Hardees, in which case McDonalds fries are easily superior. McDonalds fries are thin and crispy. Hardees fries are thicker and not as crispy.

        3. Wendy’s fries are better than McDonalds’.

          1. spqr2008

            Especially here, in the hometown of Wendy’s. All the execs go to different franchises all the time, therefore the quality and service are top notch around here.

          2. NEVER. Rarely properly cooked.

          3. bacon-magic

            My local Wendy’s has the worst workers around. They fuck up even the tasty never frozen meat.

        4. Microaggressor

          Can’t stand fries that are cooked in vegetable oil. There’s this place at the Cleveland airport I’ve been to that fries everything in lard. Needless to say, it’s my favorite airport restaurant and I wish more places would do that. It’s called Bar Symon or something like that.

          1. R C Dean

            That’s one of Michael Symon’s places. He’s a serious chef.

          2. Nephilium

            That’s one of Michael Symon’s places. Iron chef from the Cleveland area, well known for his meat eating ways. He has a mid range burger chain called the B Spot that originally only had one vegetarian item on the menu, it was called the Why???, was a grilled Portabella cap and came with a free side of bacon. They have since added veggie patties, and some blasphemy called the Impossible Burger, which combines the worst parts of veganism and watermelonism.

            At least they still give you free pork cracklins if you sit at the bar.

          3. MikeS

            Because we use 0% cows, the Impossible Burger uses a fraction of the Earth’s natural resources. Compared to cows, the Impossible Burger uses 95% less land, 74% less water, and creates 87% less greenhouse gas emissions.

            I rolled my eyes so hard I fell over backwards.

        5. BakedPenguin

          CHECKERS. (Or RALLYS, depending on where you live.)

      3. When I do need a travel bathroom break, I usually choose a McDonalds. They tend to have the cleanest restrooms on the road.

        1. bacon-magic

          Quicktrip for the win around here.

          1. ChipsnSalsa

            I’m assuming you mean Kwik Trip and had an auto-correct snafu. They wife will mandate a stop at Kwik Trip versus any place to take the potty stop.

          2. bacon-magic

            In this area it’s Quick Trip.

          3. Zunalter

            I loves me some QT.

            A single tear of joy slides down my cheek whenever I see their wall of 10,000 fountain drinks.

          4. Gadfly

            In Texas, the place to stop (assuming there’s one on your route), is Buc-ee’s. The concept of the chain is that they took a normal gas station and multiplied it by 10. There’s like 100 fuel pumps, the convenience store is the size of a Target, but the real winner is the bathrooms. For men, it’s like 30 urinals and 20 stalls, all with floor to ceiling dividers/walls/doors, with 10 sinks, and the whole thing is always clean as a whistle.

          5. Lackadaisical

            all with floor to ceiling dividers/walls/doors,

            This is clutch. At my work the dividers are nearly useless. Even for the stalls, they’re simultaneously too short and too far off the ground.

  16. wchipperdove

    Am I a bad person to say that that transgender Virginia delegate person looks ridiculous and makes me feel like I’m living in a wacky sitcom?

    1. straffinrun

      Gruesome Buddies?

      1. Bobarian LMD

        Kongressman Klinger

        1. straffinrun

          I’d take that.

    2. ChipsnSalsa

      no, that is a correct assessment of the situation.

    3. That’s not a woman. That’s a man, baby! Yeah!

      -Austin Danger Powers

    4. Hanging’ with Mr-to-Mrs. Cooper?

    5. Raston Bot

      what’s wacky will be all the idiocy when she tries to implement any of her positions.. although she will likely team up with the self-professed socialist who also won on Tuesday.

      Virginia is lost. lost for good. i’m calling it. the demographic shift from private to public sector is permanent. leviathan has delivered a death blow to VA.

      1. Psycho Effer

        If the Federal Government shrinks there will be an out-flooding of rats leaving the ships of Fairfax, Loudoun and Arlington Counties that will tip the balance back in favor of humans.

        1. Raston Bot

          that “if” is so big it doesn’t fit on my screen.

  17. Weird supernova breaks all the rules with multiple blasts

    Astronomers used to think that once a star went supernova, that was it – the supernova would fade in about one hundred days, never to be seen again. Now one supernova refuses to die, raising difficult questions and potentially opening the door for new physics.

    The Palomar Transient Factory, an international astronomical survey, first discovered the supernova in September 2014. Dubbed iPTF14hls, scientists initially categorised it as a type IIP supernova – here type II refers to the presence of hydrogen and the P refers to a “plateau” in its brightness.

    However, while most supernovae fade after about three months, iPTF14hls was observed brightening and dimming for almost two years.

    1. Just a thought not a sermon

      It’s using the French Method.

    2. ChipsnSalsa

      Weird supernova breaks all the rules with multiple blasts…

      let me guess.

      With this one weird trick

      1. Slammer

        It eats a lot of burritos

    3. Suthenboy

      As it turns out science is never settled.

      1. PieInTheSKy

        That is why we need social.justice and postmodernism to fix science and make it setteled, whether science likes it or not

        1. AlexinCT

          Quit that mansplaining science!

    4. Private Chipperbot

      It’s been taking tantric lessons from Sting.

    5. The Last American Hero

      Why is this one think it’s so special? Literally every other supernova in the universe just blasts once. That’s how it’s done.

  18. More than myth? ISU professor speaks about Sasquatch at USU

    Some claim the Sasquatch is just a man in a costume, but Meldrum said the little details— like the tendon behind the knee — are too difficult to replicate. At the time, he said spandex, stretch fur and foam rubber were not easily available. The original “Planet of the Apes” was released a year later, and Meldrum said even those costumes didn’t have the detail and contour of the Sasquatch.

    “It’s all too easy to say, ‘Oh, that’s just a man in a fur suit,’ until you see a man in a fur suit,” Meldrum said. “Especially a man in a fur suit from 1967.”

    So if Sasquatch exists, why isn’t there more evidence? Meldrum said most encounters are by happenstance, and very few people intentionally set out to find evidence.

    “The rarity, nocturnal behavior, solitary behavior, highly generalized diet makes it extremely difficult to go out with intent and collect, systematically, evidence and data,” Meldrum said.

    STEVE SMITH: MY DIET IS RAPE

    1. Suthenboy

      Professor? I dont think that word means the same thing it used to mean. Anyone ever try to live on what you can find in a pine forest to eat? There aint a goddamned thing there to eat. Perhaps ‘professor’ could explain to us how an 8 foot hominid finds enough nutrition to survive in a desert cloaked with evergreen trees? The animals that do spend 12 hours/ day eating everything they can get their paws on and as such are relatively easy to find and observe. They move around a lot and their locations are pretty easy to predict. Maybe the Russians are hiding Sasquatch?

      1. ChipsnSalsa

        If you left out a jar of peanut butter there would be full scale riot of the animals trying to get to those calories ASAP.

        1. Suthenboy

          You dont have to cover your shit up in the Amazon basin. Before you can stand up and fasten your pants all kinds of critters will have crawled out from everywhere and consumed it.

          -personal experience.

          1. tacticalpillow

            That’s nasty – Cleveland Brown

    2. Bobarian LMD

      most encounters are by happenstance, and very few people intentionally set out to find evidence.

      AND SOMETIME STEVE BURY EVIDENCE WHEN DONE.

      1. blighted_non_millenial

        AND SOMETIME STEVE SMITH PLANT EVIDENCE.. BY PLANT EVIDENCE STEVE SMITH MEAN RAPE.

    3. ElspethFlashman

      Ah the links, where people go to make STEVE SMITH jokes.

      1. Zunalter

        who’s joking?

  19. Rufus the Monocled

    Looks and sounds like we’re heading into a sexual assault panic craze period.

    Hang on.

    #metoometoo

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      Heading into? I thought we’d been there for at least a couple of years.

  20. LJW

    Not going to link to it, but GQ is basically doubling down on the Rand Paul deserved it article. Does anyone read GQ? Alienating 50% of your potential readers is always a good business decision.

    1. straffinrun

      Gentleman’s Quckoldry?

    2. Suthenboy

      I saw interviews last night with the sane neighbors who claim:

      1) Paul and the neighbor haven’t spoken in years.
      2) There was no argument over yard maintenance
      3)Neighbor is a foaming-at-the-mouth anti-trumpet and anti-GOP

      The media has been feeding us bullshit. This is another pinko going postal. The left always resorts to violence. It’s just the kind of people they are.

      1. Akira

        anti-trumpet

        That’s the disturbing part… There’s something wrong with people who don’t like jazz, ska, and classical.

    3. leonadasiv

      Well if your not going to link, can you fan the flames and let is know what idiotic thing they did. I need a fire to light the riot in me!

      1. Nephilium

        Here’s the Daily Caller writing about the GQ article.

        1. Bobarian LMD

          The only official thing I’ve seen that says this was some ‘trivial property dispute’ is the attacker’s own lawyer making public claims.

          “My client is not a raving psychopath. The fact that he allegedly murdered, partially ate, and then raped those nuns was due to work related stress.”

    4. Scruffy Nerfherder

      As much as I dislike GQ, I don’t think they’re hurting themselves with this. The metrosexual/Paulista overlap is pretty small.

      1. leonadasiv

        Perhaps the guy who assaulted Rand was none other than Hihn! If so it was Rand’s fault for being a big BULLY!

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder

          That’s one off THE LIST.

        2. bacon-magic

          I see no reports of the man smelling like cat litter with cat feces on his mouth and hands.

    5. Lackadaisical

      Aren’t men significantly more likely to be republican leaning? I suspect that their subscribers are also leaning towards the older, and whiter side of things.

      I’m guessing they’re alienating about 85% of their audience.

    6. Raston Bot

      “Does anyone read GQ?”

      /looks in pants, sees penis

      Nope, I don’t read GQ.

  21. straffinrun

    How Broke is the House of Saud?

    And things are not getting better, Saudi Arabia loses money on every barrel it produces. There are stories about them lowering their break-even price, but let’s take that with a few spoonfuls of salt. A 25% drop in break-even prices in just one year sounds a bit too good. Moreover, main competitors like Iran would still have a much lower break-even price. So even if prices would rise further, the Saudi’s might only break even while Iran gets much richer. Running vs standing still.

    1. Suthenboy

      I see dark days in their future. The population of SA has boomed with their wealth. They have food and fresh water that was never available before because of money. When the money runs out so will the food and water and that’s when the swords will come out.

      Not my problem.

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        But you know whoever is President when that happens will make it our problem. We can’t help ourselves.

      2. Rufus the Monocled

        And they’ll blame (((them))) in 3….2….

          1. Count Potato

            Decent take, but I don’t see the sunni vs shiite thing being resolved any time soon.

          2. Raston Bot

            i like this part:

            Well, the press still doesn’t know. It still sees President Trump as inexperienced. Never mind building resorts across the world. A vacuous press counts only being on the public dole as experience.

      3. Stinky Wizzleteats

        We can take them in though, it’s just the humanitarian thing to do.

      4. Lackadaisical

        Til they get nukes… then it might become our problem, someday.

      5. Gustave Lytton

        They also have a welfare state that was never available before.

    2. Jefe Hayek

      I’m actually somewhat bullish on the happenings in SA. Even if everything MbS is doing is for show, that’s still better than the previous establishment line

    3. PieInTheSKy

      So they are like the Lannisters after the mines of casterly rock stopped having gold

  22. Suspects give doughnuts to customers during Shipley robbery

    Houston Crime Stoppers and investigators with the Houston Police Department hope someone can help them track down three men involved in a robbery at a Shipley Do-Nut shop.

    One of the suspects with a handgun immediately jumped the counter and demanded the money from the cash registers. A second man also jumped the counter while a third man took the customers’ cell phones.

    During the robbery, the man who collected cell phones offered customers doughnuts while the other two suspects were robbing the employees.

    1. leonadasiv

      I hope those customers paid for them!!! Or this is more than a there man robbery.

  23. Drake

    Looks like Trump is right. Running a Rino is a recipe for disaster.

    1. Raston Bot

      He glosses over some topics. So the lesson is he didn’t motivate enough “badwhites” b/c he was a late comer to the health care debate and attacking immigration? Is that what he wrote? Admittedly, I can’t recall a single ad where either candidate talked about health care which apparently was the most important issue. Kind of odd that health care is the #1 issue for a state election when much of health care policy is Federal now anyway.. or is the writer strictly referring to Medicaid expansion?

  24. Fuck Trump: liquefied petroleum gas edition .

    Train graffiti as political dissent. How about more effort, guys. Sheesh.

    1. RBS

      Don’t you get it? Expletives are the height of well crafted political dissent.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Explosive claim

      1. Plisade

        I think it’s rather vapid myself.

        1. See Double You

          Don’t get the vapors over it.

  25. straffinrun

    CIA director met with DNC hack conspiracy theorist at Trump’s urging.

    William Binney, the former NSA employee-turned-whistleblower who circulated the conspiracy theory, confirmed to CNN that he met with Pompeo for about an hour on October 24 — despite the fact the intelligence community concluded early this year that Russia interfered in the 2016 presidential election.

    Conspiracy theory? Projection on hyperdrive.

    1. leonadasiv

      Holy sit your not kidding. I think history forked and I ended up in the bizarro world where I’m a conspiracy theorist.

      1. Stinky Wizzleteats

        I’m becoming convinced we live in a simulation and the programmers are throwing this stuff at us because they’ve gotten bored.

        1. I suppose the whole Spanish Inquisition could have been part of the sim.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder

      I read at least three articles on Binney this morning. All of them paint him as a crackpot conspiracist. Meanwhile, none of them address his basic claim, that the download could not have occurred over the internet because of the speeds required. This is as blatant a case of media manipulation as I’ve ever seen.

      1. straffinrun

        Lemme guess…He appeared on RT so he’s obviously a Russian agent?

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder

          It’s more along the lines of “IT CAN’T NOT BE RUSSIA, IF YOU THINK IT’S NOT RUSSIA YOU’RE NUTS, QED”

          1. straffinrun

            That’s like a nesting doll being fingered by an enigma inside a tautology.

      2. leonadasiv

        Tom woods did an interview with him the other day that I had skipped (didn’t think it would be interesting). But if this guy is that dangerous that they would paint him at conspiracy theorist,I’m going to have to tune in.

        1. Binney is great. He’s not a crackpot.

      3. Suthenboy

        Some months back Mark Levin interviewed some NSA operative. They guy said it would be impossible to download remotely from the DNC server without the NSA seeing it, especially if it had been going overseas. It had to be downloaded directly from the server onto a drive.

        Most of the time things really are just what they appear to be. The name Seth Rich comes to mind. How’s that deadpool on Donna Brazille going?

        1. deadpool on Donna Brazille.

          I would pay good money to see this as well.

        2. leonadasiv

          Hillary won’t kill her for two reasons. Right now it would be far too suspicious. Second, is that now Donna will live the rest of her life wondering when it’s coming.

          1. Suthenboy

            Clinton doesnt seem to be that cautious. She appears to be a sociopath that is convinced she is invulnerable. It really wouldn’t surprise me. It would be suspicious alright and Clinton would just laugh it off with “What? What are you looking at me for?” with that same ‘with a cloth’ face.

          2. spqr2008

            What’s truly scary, is that my one friend (A traditional liberal that doesn’t agree with a lot of the progressive wing crap) thinks it’s entirely plausible (not possible or likely, mind you) that House of Cards (the Netflix one) is based on the Clintons in its entirety, and that the modus operandi of Claire Underwood is very close to the MO of Hillary.

          3. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

            I thought that was pretty obvious from the show?

      4. thepasswordispassword

        I have seen technical rebuttals of it along the lines of “it could have been exfiltrated over the wire and then transferred on to a USB drive before being leaked.” If you haven’t tripped any wires it’s not that implausible to slowly grab everything you can since no one will notice anyways. Digital security is less timed sweeps and patrols and more trip wire alarm based.

    3. Intelligence sources told CNN that many people inside the CIA were very uncomfortable with the meeting.

      Good.

      1. Scruffy Nerfherder

        It’s like I’m supposed to be concerned by that.

      2. leonadasiv

        Once again… When did we start trusting the CIA let alone treating it like a competent organisation?

        1. BECAUSE HILLARY LOST RHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

        2. ChipsnSalsa

          But there was yellow cake, it was delicious!

    4. Akira

      despite the fact the intelligence community concluded early this year that Russia interfered in the 2016 presidential election. released some phony-baloney “report” that was mostly comprised of insinuations about the Russia Today network and contained no actual evidence.

      Fixed that for them

  26. The Late P Brooks

    We’re from the government

    Undercover tests conducted by the Department of Homeland Security revealed ‘vulnerabilities’ at security checkpoints across US airports.

    The tests found failures in Transportation Security Administration screener performance, screening equipment and associated procedures.

    The failure rate of security test was ‘in the ballpark’ of 80 per cent, a source close to the investigation told ABC News.

    —————

    TSA officials released a statement about the report, saying it is working to implement recommendations from Homeland Security.

    ‘We take the OIG’s findings very seriously and are implementing measures that will improve screening effectiveness at checkpoints,’ said TSA administrator David Pekoske. ‘We are focused on staying ahead of a dynamic threat to aviation with continued investment in the workforce, enhanced procedures and new technologies,’ he added.

    That guy’s head should be on a pole outside the Capitol. He’ll probably get a big pat on the back and a bigger budget.

    “Dynamic threat” my ass. Put all those people to work pulling weeds on the side of the road.

    1. I’m so looking to flying out this weekend…. yeah.

      1. Bring your own lube. Warming KY Jelly, to at least get something out of the experience.

        1. That makes me wonder if anybody has evacuated their bowels during the probey parts of a TSA strip search. Either a coil of turds or cups of rancid diarrhea would be fine. I would pay lots of money to see that shit.

          1. Scruffy Nerfherder

            I’m starting to worry for you.

          2. Oh come ON, the look on the TSA lummox’s face would be incredible.

          3. What if he just smiled?

          4. What if he just smiled?

            Also a highly acceptable response. It’s like this!

        2. ChipsnSalsa

          But only 3.4 OZ or less.

          1. In a ziploc baggie.

        3. I’m hoping for some foreplay. And then a quiet cry.

      2. DesigNate

        Considering all the new bullshit theater they’ve been rolling out, I’m going to bite my tongue because by god I’m getting to Florida and back.

        Once safely home I’ll impotently bitch on Facebook like a good patriotic American.

        (Seriously, how fucked up is all of this?)

  27. The Late P Brooks

    Trip Advisor is going to post rape allegations in their reviews? What couold possibly go wrong?

    I was gang raped at that Trump hotel. DON’T STAY THERE!

    1. PieInTheSKy

      But you sure.you didn’t you enjoy it?

    2. That’s what in was talking about. They’re gonna get sued into the Stone Age.

      1. Lackadaisical

        Is it really different from what they already do?

        If people give the hotel tons of 1-star reviews and no one shows up anymore you also damaged their business.

        1. It’s very different. Saying “the room smelled musty and the front desk clerk were rude” is subjective. Sexual assault and rape are well-defined crimes. Saying those things happen at a specific hotel without the ability to substantiate it sounds actionable.

  28. PieInTheSKy

    So i am in haarlem jopenkerk drinking my too manyeth beer and i can say gose beer sucks unless you happen to like sour wheat beers, mooie nell ipa is not bad and sin and remorse is also decent

    1. Oh a drunken report from the front. Tell us when you’ve done the elephant impression.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder

      I recognize some of the words in that post.

    3. Are you going to visit a “coffee shop”, Pie?

      1. PieInTheSKy

        I dont smoke so no

        1. BakedPenguin

          ah, crap, nevermind…

    4. Nephilium

      Well, considering goses are supposed to be sour (with a hint of salt) wheat beer, that’s like saying NE IPA’s suck unless you happen to like hazy beers with a lot of fruit forward hops. Too bad we’re finally moving into winter, a nice light gose is great in the summer.

      1. PieInTheSKy

        Insert that’s the joke meme here

        1. Nephilium

          /watches joke fly over head.

          If you enjoy the sours, then you should keep an eye out for Fantome and Cantillon both are upper echelon beers round the world.

    5. PieInTheSKy

      Also haarlem is very hipster

      1. PieInTheSKy

        It is to amsterdam what brooklin is to new york

        1. spqr2008

          Not what Harlem is to New York?

    6. PieInTheSKy

      Also like belgium beers here have way to much alcohol. I like me beer under 7% but after doubting thomas army of darkness and sin and remorse all at 10% i am geting somewhat of a buzz

      1. Private Chipperbot

        Somewhat?

    7. Did you visit the Frans Hals museum?

    8. BakedPenguin
  29. The Late P Brooks

    Rooooshunz

    “We now know that Russian intelligence officers and state-sponsored hackers were responsible for highly complex and sophisticated attacks on Yahoo’s systems”, Mayer said. She said “really aggressive” pursuit of hackers was needed to discourage the efforts, and that even the most well-defended companies “could fall victim to these crimes”.

    I just don’t believe that woman is particularly bright. I could be wrong, I suppose.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      I think she made an extremely poor career choice and is now trying to salvage her future options.

      Of course, most of us would be happy with the payout she got for the crappy job she did.

      1. Bobarian LMD

        I just don’t believe that woman is particularly bright

        Definite would, though.

        1. bacon-magic

          ^^^

      2. Lackadaisical

        You mean taking a company that was worth less than the amount of money they had on hand, and further losing value over her tenure didn’t do a great job?

        Verizon, the largest US wireless operator, acquired most of Yahoo Inc’s assets in June, the same month Mayer stepped down. Verizon disclosed last month that a 2013 Yahoo data breach affected all three billion of its accounts, compared with an estimate of more than one billion disclosed in December.

        Does Verizon (or their shareholders) have a case against Meyer for not disclosing this?

        Totally agree with Bob though, definite would.

  30. The Late P Brooks

    sin and remorse is also decent

    Are you wallowing in it?

    1. PieInTheSKy

      I regret no… well everything really

      1. Stinky Wizzleteats

        Steven Segal, that paragon of good taste and good acting? I refuse to believe it.

        1. bacon-magic

          It was the Russians!

      2. The Last American Hero

        So brave of her to come forward and expose the asshole right away.

      3. ‘I ran out and called my agent. Unfazed, she replied, “Well, I didn’t know if he was your type”.’

        I am shocked–shocked!–to find that gambling is going on in here!

        I get the impression from a lot of these stories that the individual cases of assault or creepiness or whatever you want to call it occur in an environment where the idea of a sexual quid pro quo is traditional and well-known. Almost as if the people reporting the incidents are the only ones who are surprised. And quite honestly that leads me to doubt the sincerity of that surprise.

        This is not to say that it’s acceptable or appropriate behavior. I’m absolutely not condoning it. I’m saying that you can’t leave your car unlocked in a shitty part of town and expect to find your purse on the seat where you left it. That doesn’t mean it’s right, it just means that you can’t expose yourself to a known risk and then complain that there was a risk. Address the problem or play by the known, shitty rules.

      4. CPRM

        I’ll retell this story cuz it’s a good’n. In film school Jerry Ziesmer (Assistant Director of Apocalypse Now and most of Cameron Crowe’s movies) came to speak to us. He told a story about when he met with Steven Seagal about a project. He goes to Steven’s house and Steven is sitting out back in a pagoda, wearing a kimono and surrounded by dobermans. Instead of talking about the film all Seagal wanted to talk about was how he worked for the CIA and they totally had a time machine.

        1. B.P.

          That’s hilarious.

        2. Private Chipperbot

          And that, boys and girls, is how Under Siege got made. 😀

    1. PieInTheSKy

      Ah the plot thins

    2. Suthenboy

      It is great fun watching lefties eat each other at a furious pace.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKUOB8MN4Kc

  31. Ken Shultz

    Have you heard the fake news about fake news?

    Turns out, it may have been fake.

    AT&T is looking to acquire Time Warner, which brings up some legitimate concerns about competition (regardless of whether you think the government should get involved). So, the antitrust folks at the Department of Justice is involved in approving the acquisition.

    There are conflicting statements about what the DoJ is asking the newly combined company to do in order to get approval.

    “Sources” claimed that AT&T offered to divest itself of Time Warner’s Turner Broadcasting, which is getting a lot of attention because of CNN and Trump’s criticism of CNN as fake news.

    AT&T is telling a different story.

    AT&T has “no intention” of selling CNN despite the Justice Department’s demand the company sell it in order to approve the Time Warner acquisition, according to CEO and chairman Randall Stephenson.

    “Until now, we’ve never commented on our discussions with the DOJ,” Stephenson said in a statement. “But given DOJ’s statement this afternoon, it’s important to set the record straight. Throughout this process, I have never offered to sell CNN and have no intention of doing so.”

    Sources told CNBC that the Justice Department wants AT&T to sell Turner Broadcasting, which includes CNN, or DirecTV as condition for approval of the $85 billion AT&T-Time Warner deal.

    In addition, DOJ sources told NBC News [that] AT&T offered selling CNN during a meeting on Monday regarding the proposed merger. The DOJ’s Antitrust Division “flatly rejected it” because it would not solve potential anti-competition issues. Justice Department officials told NBC News there are multiple ways to solve issues regarding the AT&T-Time Warner deal, but selling CNN would not resolve concerns.

    —-CNBC

    https://www.cnbc.com/2017/11/08/doj-demands-cnn-or-directv-be-sold-as-condition-for-att-time-warner-deal-approval.html

    So, on the one hand, the DoJ is saying not only that AT&T offered to sell CNN to approve the deal, they’re also saying that they rejected that offer. It makes it sound like AT&T tried to bribe the Trump administration into approving the acquisition by offering to sacrifice a major source of anti-Trump criticism ahead of election 2020, and Trump’s DoJ scratched their collective heads and said, “We don’t give a fuck about that. Who do you think we are, Hillary Clinton?”

    On the other hand, AT&T is reacting as if the DoJ demanded that they sell CNN as a condition of approval, but AT&T is standing good and true in the face of Trump’s evil vendettas.

    I’d say the truth lies somewhere in the middle, but that equation doesn’t work well when at least one side is obviously lying.

    1. RAHeinlein

      I have been watching this story unfold yesterday/today on Squawk. The media is pushing the “Trump is using the DoJ to get rid of CNN” narrative. Trump openly opposed this merger during the campaign and I find it telling that although DoJ asked that either DirectTV or Turner be divested, AT&T’s Stephenson IMMEDIATELY issues a statement specifically about CNN.

      1. Ken Shultz

        Now Trump has to be legitimately concerned about this becoming the center of a potential impeachment proceeding–especially if the Democrats get control of the House. If the merger is rejected by the Trump administration, is there any way to avoid an investigation?

        If Sessions was involved in any discussion of the merger (and wouldn’t he be?), will he need to recuse himself again in naming a special prosecutor?

        Maybe it’s better for Trump, now, if the merger just gets approved.

        1. RAHeinlein

          I believe Sessions would not have involvement – there is an Assistant AG for the Antitrust Division (currently Delrahim who was confirmed in late September. I’m now curious who in Antitrust was handling – Trump appointee or career Gov’t worker/Obama hold-over…

          I am aligned with you – this should just be approved and move-on. Smells like a set-up.

  32. The Late P Brooks

    Of course, most of us would be happy with the payout she got for the crappy job she did.

    I doubt she’s worried about where her next meal is coming from. Maybe she’ll go into politics.

    “I have a proven record of fucking things up. You remember that old saying about ‘It could always be worse’ don’t you? Vote for me, and find out.”

    1. tacticalpillow

      She’s worth a half-billion dollars. She wins.

  33. Count Potato

    “Jury Slams Developer for Whitewashing Graffiti Artists’ Works

    A federal jury in New York on Tuesday awarded thousands of dollars in damages to graffiti artists whose work was whitewashed under order of a real estate developer who owned the building they painted on.

    Plaintiffs’ attorney Eric Baum of Eisenberg & Baum accused Wolkoff of destroying art that was protected under the obscure Visual Artists Rights Act by whitewashing it without warning overnight.

    “We know that ignorance of a law is no excuse for violating it,” Baum said in his closing argument Monday. He called the whitewashing “the worst intentional destruction or mutilation of art in U.S. history.”

    Wolkoff’s attorney David Ebert of Ingram Yuzek Gainen Carroll & Bertolotti argued street art’s ephemeral nature should have prepared the artists for their work’s disappearance.

    “They’re telling you that because I put my artwork on the side of a building, I am entitled to rights that trump your property rights,” Ebert told jurors Monday. He also said none of the artists suffered any actual financial or reputational losses.”

    https://www.courthousenews.com/jury-slams-developer-whitewashing-graffiti-artists-works/

    1. Private Chipperbot

      I don’t know the history of the area, but aside from the fact it’s his property, why weren’t the artists charged with vandalism? This seems completely fucked.

    2. Tundra

      Loony. Bin.

      Secede, already.

      1. DOOMco

        And stay out!

        1. Raston Bot

          sounds like it would afford damages claims to creators of certain southern historical statues.

    3. Stinky Wizzleteats

      I swear I’d go to prison before I payed a cent. That’s nuts.

      1. Ken Shultz

        I had a nightmare the other night.

        I was walking down the beach with my shirt off, and people started looking at me like there was something seriously wrong with me. I looked down only to discover that I had somehow developed stinky wizzleteats. And there they were, I didn’t even know what they were or what they looked like until I saw them in my dream. It was a horrifying experience. Everyone I knew was on that beach, laughing to themselves about my hairy, smelly, wizzleteats.

        1. Stinky Wizzleteats

          I think I might need to change my username to something a little more dignified.

          1. Stanky Whizzletates?

          2. Stinky Wizzleteats

            I was thinking more along the lines of:

            His Excellency, President for Life, Field Marshal Al Hadji Doctor INSERT NAME HERE, VC, DSO, MC, Lord of All the Beasts of the Earth and Fishes of the Seas and Conqueror of the British Empire in Africa in General and Uganda in Particular

          3. I say give it a go for a while. Try it on.

          4. Ken Shultz

            It’s funny what people get used to.

            In that thread where Virginia Postrel said something something about how she hoped the people in that thread didn’t turn out for the Reason cruise, it was full of “Masterbatin’ Pete” arguing with “Palin’s Buttplug”, etc., etc.

            After a while, I don’t even think about the names anymore. People were looking at the content and wondering, “What’s Postrel whining about? There’s nothing bad there!”

          5. Stinky Wizzleteats

            You’re right but I shouldn’t have let a weekend binge watching old Ren and Stimpy cartoons influence my choice. Ah well, lesson learned.

    4. Grumbletarian

      Owner: “Your Honor, the original paint I had put on the building was an evidence of artistic expression on my part that was destroyed by the actions of the plaintiffs.”

    5. The Elite Elite

      The hell? They violated his property, and they get to sue him?

      1. Lackadaisical

        Someone needs to fire up the wood chipper.

      2. Grumbletarian

        That they got to sue him is fine. That they won is a travesty.

    6. Gustave Lytton

      Graffiti vandals should be hung from lampposts with a rattle can shoved down their throats and their hands cut off. I’m getting sick and tired of getting it cleaned off my building.

    7. bacon-magic

      That makes me sick. Graffiti my property, I dare you commies.

    8. Raston Bot

      Not sure how this applies here but sculptors of Confederate statues are not entitled to reparations for having their works destroyed without the artist signing a waiver.

  34. DOOMco

    Marysville, ks: home or the black squirrel statues and a pony express stop. Also there’s a train just hanging out downtown.

  35. Private Chipperbot

    Florida Woman, poppin’ tags…

    Authorities say a woman tried to sneak more than $1,800 worth of electronics through a Florida Walmart’s self-checkout by switching the items’ price tags with those from clearance items.

    1. spqr2008

      Why would you let anyone take the expensive stuff out of the electronics area? Lock that stuff up so that someone can’t try and pull that stuff (because I’ll guarantee it’s been done before at the same store, if they haven’t been locking stuff up).

      1. Gadfly

        My local Walmart even locks down their $30 USB drives, so I’m surprised that a Florida Walmart (of all places) would have more lax security.

    2. invisible finger

      Sounds like fake news to me. Or extremely shitty reporting.

      Price tags are not the same thing as barcodes. I could see where an expensive, small item is stuffed into a larger, less expensive item. But even then, the self-checkout works on a weight basis with some room for tolerances. The weight tolerance was violated which set off the signals that something screwy was going on at self-checkout.

      In any case, something that happens every ten minutes is not news.

  36. Count Potato

    “Girl Blames Her Stupidity On Racism After Ordering Fries At Taco Bell”

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2578POpB5tY

    I’d like to think this is some sort of performance art, because no one could be that stupid.

    1. DOOMco

      Oh ye of little faith

    2. Seems fake. Why is she being filmed?

      1. B.P.

        My thought as well.

  37. Count Potato

    “EXCLUSIVE: Hillary Clinton is in ‘secret negotiations’ with ex-British spy Christopher Steele to buy SECOND ‘dirty dossier’ on Trump’s romantic englements with Russian women, claims Clinton author”

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5056421/Hillary-Clinton-talks-buy-SECOND-dossier-Trump.html

    *raises hand*

    What’s an englement?

    1. The Elite Elite

      Let’s just say we’d like to avoid any, Imperial englements.

      1. Private Chipperbot

        Well. That’s the trick, isn’t it?

    2. Suthenboy

      Who was telling me upthread that Clinton wouldn’t dare off Brazille because it would look too suspicious? I am telling y’all, that woman is convinced that nothing can touch her and no lie is too big. She is a straight-up sociopath.

      1. R C Dean

        that woman is convinced that nothing can touch her

        Well, she’s been right so far.

    3. Q Continuum

      SHUT THE FUCK UP

    4. B.P.

      She’s turning into the Wile E. Coyote of the political world. Trump is for sure going to run into the wall with the painted-on tunnel this time.

    5. CPRM

      So, if it can be proved that the democrats paid for the Steele Dossier, which actively sought information from the Russian government, how is that not collusion? I mean, Trump Jr. was contacted by a Russian citizen and agreed to take the meeting, and that IS COLUZUN!!11!!1!!

      1. antisthenes

        I still don’t understand why Trump hasn’t appointed a second special prosecutor to investigate Clinton collusion with the Russians and everyone involved in the U1 deal, including Mueller. Just the utter farce of one special prosecutor investigating another special prosecutor would be wondrous to behold. Appoint Popehat or somebody who can make it entertaining.

  38. Ken Shultz

    Did anybody else catch last night’s episode of Mr. Robot?

    It was fucking excellent, and I’m not talking about in reference to the rest of the show, even. I’m talking about the direction, the perspective, the way it was shot, edited, performed, etc.

    There were no commercials–and there probably couldn’t be without destroying the episode–because It was written as all one shot–like a Richard Linklater movie, moving from character to character from beginning to end as they meet each other, with no cut scenes. It also incorporated overhead “invisible ceiling” techniques I’ve seen best used in Gaspar Noe’s Enter the Void. All of it came across as so effortless, so natural, none of it superfluous or referential. It was just a natural way to tell that story in that episode.

    That was one of the best directed television episodes I’ve ever seen in my life. Even if you’ve never watched the show, you should check out that episode.

    *Edit Fairy Says ‘Oh Ye Of Little Faith*

    1. Ken Shultz

      I hesitate to point out the busted italics tag, ’cause when the edit fairy blesses my posts, I always seem to get a fat guy in a tutu.

      1. Psycho Effer

        The Edit Fairy is like those jelly beans where half of them are delicious and the other half vomit-inducing, and you don’t know which is which until it’s in your mouth. We lucked out today.

        1. ChipsnSalsa

          The day is yung

    2. Ken Shultz

      Thank you, Edit Fairy!

      1. bacon-magic

        You won the edit fairy lotto.

  39. Tundra

    Who broke the site?

    1. DOOMco

      I’m shaggy on this one.

      1. Tundra

        First!

    2. ChipsnSalsa

      Gilmore, always Gilmore.

  40. Q Continuum

    These girls definitely have assault weapons so you’d better get one before they’re banned.

    http://archive.is/QaudD

    6, 31, 39 and (((10)))

    1. The Other Kevin

      On thing I noticed is that in these galleries, about 50% of the girls have belly button piercings. Is it that popular in general, or just popular with girls who post cleavage pictures of themselves on the internet?

      1. Just Say’n

        I think you’ve answered your own question. I also noticed in college that girls who were very flirtatious at bars usually had tongue piercings. Tongue piercings are not that popular, I later found out

      2. Q Continuum

        I think it’s a self-selection thing. Belly button piercings, tongue piercings and Brazilian waxes all seem to kind of go together with a certain, erm, personality type.

      3. My wife has a pierced belly button. She’s 42, but she’s had it for at least 15 years.

        1. Q Continuum

          Go on…

        2. Private Chipperbot

          My wife had one as well, but took it out after #1 was born.

    2. Lackadaisical

      23 looks oddly familiar… but I do like her.

    3. bacon-magic

      Nice selection.
      *dives to bunk*

  41. Count Potato

    “Former Smallville actress is ‘second in command of sex cult under investigation for extorting, beating and branding its members – including Catherine Oxenberg’s daughter’”

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5063683/Former-Smallville-actress-second-command-sex-cult.html

    1. RBS

      Would.

    2. Bobarian LMD

      Former Smallville actress

      Was hoping for…

      1. bacon-magic

        No kidding.

    3. Lackadaisical

      I have a hard time feeling sorry for people who fell for the whole thing.

      1. Just Say’n

        “hard time”

        Intentional?

        1. Lackadaisical

          It’d be cooler if it was.

    4. Just Say’n

      It’s like a trashy version of “Eyes Wide Shut”

      1. Private Chipperbot

        I was hoping for a classier version of Debbie Does Dallas.

        1. Just Say’n

          Debbie does the upper west side of Manhattan?

      2. Chipwooder

        Fidelio

    5. Dafuq? I’m way, way, way better looking than that dude. Where’s my damn harem!?

      1. Bobarian LMD

        He’s got game.

        Us Glibs… not so much.

    6. Q Continuum

      I’ve always wanted a sex cult.

      1. Nephilium

        STEVE SMITH RECRUITING FOR SEX CULT… AND BY RECRUITING, MEANS… YOU KNOW.

    7. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Well that’s some weird shit.

  42. Count Potato

    “If The Supreme Court Takes This Gun Control Case, Its Decision Will Be Huge

    When the Supreme Court meets later today to discuss pending petitions for review, the justices’ conference calendar will include a pivotal Second Amendment case: Kolbe v. Hogan.

    In Kolbe v. Hogan, the full Fourth Circuit Court of Appeals upheld Maryland’s ban of semiautomatic rifles and detachable ammunition magazines that exceed ten rounds. In doing so, the Fourth Circuit became the fourth federal appellate court to uphold the constitutionality of a ban on “assault” weapons and large-capacity magazines. The Second, Seventh, and District of Columbia circuits have previously upheld similar bans, and, to date, the Supreme Court has refused to enter the fray.”

    http://thefederalist.com/2017/11/09/supreme-court-takes-gun-control-case-decision-will-huge/

    1. Lackadaisical

      If the court ruled against the law, that would mean that NYSAFE would be unconstitutional as well.

      They either won’t take the case or will rule in favor of Maryland.

      1. I’m watching this bitch like a hawk. We have ridiculous gun laws in Maryland, and my big hope with Hogan was that under his administration we’d finally be able to get O’Malley’s stupid-ass ban lifted.

        It really is absurd. You can legally buy magazines with greater than 10 round capacity in PA or VA, or anywhere else, and keep and use them in MD, which is what I do. You can also buy “repair kits” and just build the damned things yourself as long as you do it across state lines. You can buy an AR off the rack at Bass Pro as long as it has a “heavy barrel”, and you can replace the barrel. You can’t buy an AK because it’s scary, though. Oh, unless it’s one that was purchased legally in-state prior to the ban.

        1. Lackadaisical

          I think the maximum number of bullets you’re allowed to have in a magazine is 7 now in NY. Oh, and everyone has to register their firearms.

          The general response outside if NYC was to tell Cuomo to come get the 3 extra bullets.

          1. The gulf of a cultural difference between NYC and the rest of the state never ceases to amaze me. It really is a failure of…something, that NYC effectively determines the laws for people in completely different environments with what amounts to an entirely different culture simply because they happen to live in the same arbitrarily-defined territory.

          2. Lackadaisical

            It is almost like things are best run when devolved to the smallest possible decision maker (preferably the individual).

            The rest of the state, sans the Adirondacks is basically rust belty, and geographically and culturally is more similar to the midwest/great lakes region (since, well, we’re part of the great lakes region), though even up here people tend to the left.

    1. ChipsnSalsa

      Amazing, glad they didn’t give up.

    2. Lackadaisical

      Reminds me of Charlie Gard somehow.

      1. Q Continuum

        Thank G-d he didn’t live in Britain.

    3. Lackadaisical

      In total, they grew close to a square meter of skin (3 square feet.

      That is not how square feet work. Fucking journalists.

      1. Suthenboy

        *facepalm*

        These are the same people assuring us the science is settled on global warming.

      2. antisthenes

        We’re talking about journalists. You know, sky-shriekers, not people that understand grade school math.

    4. Count Potato

      “To fix that, the doctors took a small piece of the boy’s skin from an area that was OK. In the lab, they added a normal version of his bad gene to his skin cells. They grew sheets of the boy’s skin, in much the same way skin grafts are grown for burn victims.

      In total, they grew close to a square meter of skin (3 square feet.) The lab-grown skin was then transplanted onto the boy in three operations, ultimately covering 80 percent of his body. Ten days later, the new skin was already beginning to grow, De Luca said. After eight months, the doctors said that nearly all of the boy’s skin had been generated by the modified stem cells.”

      Wow.

    1. MikeS

      “It’s all because of all of you that we are here tonight, celebrating a victory, a historic victory for our city and for our state,” Middleton told supporters Tuesday night, according to the Sun.

      Right, because it’s not about electing the person who is best suited to perform the duties of the office. The important thing is showing everyone that you are woke as fuck.

    2. ChipsnSalsa

      What is the status of the frogs?

      1. spqr2008

        The frogs have succumbed to our pollution of our precious bodily fluids, and are now gay.

    3. Raston Bot

      does a bi- woman really count if she’s married to a dude? is she really bi? i’m going to need video confirmation.

  43. Count Potato

    “The California NAACP is pushing to get rid of the national anthem that they’re calling racist and anti-black.”

    http://sacramento.cbslocal.com/2017/11/07/naacp-national-anthem-racist/

    1. Just Say’n

      And the ACLU supports the effort. Cosmotarian Moment!

      1. Q Continuum

        ENB could not be reached for comment.

        1. Just Say’n

          I fully expect her and Robby (maybe Gillespie depending on how much he hates himself that day) to write articles about how this is totally normal and absolutely makes sense

      2. Suthenboy

        Commies on board? There is a surprise.

    2. Drake

      After Calexit, they can pick their own song.

    3. leonadasiv

      Hey it’s their state’s rights….err wait…

    4. Viking1865

      Yeah I heard this a couple days ago. The progs have decided that the line “the hireling and slave” in the Star Spangled Banner, which refers to the conscripts and mercenaries of the invading British army, is now……wait for it……RAAAACCISSTTTTT

      They are beyond parody.

      1. leonadasiv

        Only black people were slaves, because America invented slavery.

      2. spqr2008

        Especially considering one of the reasons the War of 1812 was fought was that American Merchantmen were seized and conscripted into the Royal Navy to fight Napoleon.

      3. Lackadaisical

        Definitely one of the best lines. That and something about how we are going to turn the seas red with their blood. We should really sing the other verses of that song.

    1. Count Potato

      I would have re-written Sunshine Cleaning to include a lesbian sex scene.

      http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0862846/?ref_=nm_flmg_act_26

      1. Q Continuum

        +1 strap-on

      2. Psycho Effer

        My cleaning company is called Sunshine Cleaning. Coincidence? They’re in my house right now so i might have to check.

  44. Count Potato

    “Perhaps this is where Lauren Southern splits with the neo-Nazis — without women like Southern, who will take on the “social justice warrior” feminists? And who will the Proud Boys use as material for their monthly wank? (In Southern’s self-published 82-page book, Barbarians: How the Baby Boomers, Immigration, and Islam Screwed My Generation, she references masturbation five times, including, “ … I don’t masturbate to anime characters. I dress up like them and guys masturbate to me.”)”

    https://www.splcenter.org/hatewatch/2017/11/07/lauren-southern-alt-right%E2%80%99s-canadian-dog-whistler

    I’ll be in my bunker?

    1. Q Continuum

      She recognizes that she’s an attractive woman with a strong online presence and that’s supposed to be shocking somehow?

    2. Bobarian LMD

      Where and when does she do this dressing up, and what characters?

      Asking for a friend.

        1. Juvenile Bluster

          She’s cosplaying as Samus Aran, the protagonist from Nintendo’s Metroid series.

          https://i.imgur.com/LgN7aMH.jpg

          1. Count Potato

            Thanks, the extent of my knowledge is “There is an island nation in the north pacific that draws stuff.”

          2. bacon-magic

            Hate. You. Still… would.

  45. Q Continuum

    Campus garbage babies throw a temper tantrum.

    https://www.thecollegefix.com/post/38692/

    1. Count Potato

      “Punching up” is still punching.

      Anyway, here is a good article what’s wrong with the kids these days:

      http://reason.com/archives/2017/10/26/the-fragile-generation

    2. Lackadaisical

      Campus garbage babies

      CGB could be the new SJW. I like it, and more fitting.

      1. I think Dave Burge has previously named them as “Screaming Campus Garbage Babies”.

  46. Just Say’n

    http://nypost.com/2017/11/08/boston-radio-host-mocks-roy-halladay-he-got-what-he-deserved/

    Roy Halladay mocked by Boston radio host. Some of you might care about this

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      Just adds to my list of reasons that Boston is the worst city in the United States, and it’s not particularly close.

      1. Just Say’n

        The worst cities in America

        (1) Portland (take your microbreweries and your avocado toast on a long walk off a short pier)
        (2) Seattle (I hate you, Frasier Crane)
        (3) Boston (Fenway isn’t that great. How do you like them apples?)
        (4) Austin (You are the disgrace of Texas)
        (5) Jacksonville (You’re a city? You have a football team? Whaaaaaaat?)

        1. (3) Boston (Fenway isn’t that great. How do you like them apples?)

          It really isn’t great. It’s kind of a miserable experience from my point of view. I’d take Coors Field over Fenway any day of the week.

          1. Just Say’n

            Unpopular opinion:

            I’d rather watch a baseball game at Comiskey Park (US Cellular) than Wrigley Field. The tickets are cheaper. You don’t have a bunch of yuppies taking selfies during the entire game. And you can tailgate

          2. MikeS

            I’m glad that I’ve been to a game at Wrigley, because Wrigley. But I have to agree. For actually watching a game, Comisky FTW. And I hate the White Sox.

          3. MikeS

            …although post game, Wrigley wins hands down. The neighborhood bars around there were pretty fun.

          4. Just Say’n

            The Wrigley neighborhood (technically Lakeview) is where my wife’s family is from. They go way back. Back when there use to be a dump across the street from Wrigley and the Bears use to play there. It’s a historic ball field and everything, but the whole place is a giant tourist trap, except now those tourists live nearby.

        2. Juvenile Bluster

          Portland and Seattle don’t come close to Boston. Boston tries to pass itself off as this progressive, cosmopolitan New England city when it’s the biggest shithole of racism in the United States. Fuck Boston, fuck those accents, fuck people who live there, fuck the Patriots, fuck Tom Brady. And fuck Matt Damon. Even though I think he lives down here now (has a huge house on the water in Miami)

          1. Q Continuum

            MATT. DAMON.

        3. Q Continuum

          Good list.

        4. R C Dean

          Needz moar Chicago and Detroit.

          1. Just Say’n

            I can’t bring myself to put Chicago on the list and I take it easy on Midwestern cities. Detroit gets saved because Kiss wrote that song “Detroit Rock City” and the Stooges are from Ann Arbor, which is close enough.

          2. B.P.

            MC5

        5. Suthenboy

          I dont see New Orleans on that list. It’s so rotten it doesnt qualify as a city.

        6. Chipwooder

          Where’s DC? That festering pustule of a city where the biggest leeches from across the country congregate?

          1. Just Say’n

            DC isn’t a city- it’s a cancer

          2. Chipwooder

            And Virginia is now terminal

        7. Psycho Effer

          Do you have a newsletter? I would like to sign up.

        8. A Leap at the Wheel

          Jesus fucking Christ Just Say’n. How doe DC not make your top five!!!?!@

          Put your monocle and top hat in the trash and don’t let the door hit you on your way out.

      2. Rufus the Monocled

        Yeh, heard that earlier.

        I get the whole ‘why do dangerous hobbies when you have a family thing’ but holy moly…that was pretty heartless. Not fireable though. It’s his opinion.

    2. MikeS

      I read the story, and then read the linked article and watched the video. I can say I don’t know if I agree with the way he said it, but the guy has a point.

      And I don’t think “mock” is the right word. More accurate would be “condemned.” He wasn’t making fun of him, he was calling him out for taking serious risks with his life while his friends were saying how important his kids are to him.

      1. F. Stupidity Jr.

        He wasn’t making fun of him, he was calling him out for taking serious risks with his life

        How serious? Was he stunt-piloting or flying some weird experimental aircraft? If he was just flying, that’s not dangerous in and of itself. It’s safer than driving.

        1. MikeS

          According to one observer, who talked with TMZ Sports, which obtained the footage, Halladay was “flying like that all week. Aggressively.” Other spectators confirmed the account, saying they saw the ICON aircraft frequently pulling up mere feet from the water, and they were so alarmed, they pulled out their phones to record the sight.

          1. F. Stupidity Jr.

            Holy shit. Well then yeah, the guy was right.

          2. RBS

            they were so alarmed, they pulled out their phones to record the sight

            JFC

          3. MikeS

            Yeah, speaking of assholes; one point in the video, the guys buddy tells him to dial 911. So instead of doing that, the guy yells to the other boaters to ask if they have dialed 911.

      2. Yeah, I’m with you on this. The timing and wording could have been better, but the point stands. He was flying irresponsibly, and as a father he had a responsibility to his family that he failed by taking needless risks for…what? Shits and giggles? If he’d died in a car crash while drunk coming home from a club at night, he’d be pilloried. This isn’t really different.

    3. DOOMco

      That’s fucked.
      My apologies on behalf of the city of Boston.

  47. wdalasio

    In a show of force abject stupidity, 22 other Democrat Senators joined her in calling for a weapons ban on scary-looking guns that are no different that their less-scary-looking counterparts.

    I was just thinking about this yesterday morning. If Hillary Clinton hadn’t been vehemently anti-Second Amendment, she probably would have had a decent chance of winning in Wisconsin, Michigan and/or Pennsylvania. If she had won those states, she would have won the election.

    The Democrats never learn.

    1. Just Say’n

      I don’t know. There were a lot of factors that doomed Hillary. But, Democrats should not lose sight of the fact that Wisconsin, Michigan, and Ohio have been trending more and more Republican over the past twenty years. The Midwest has now become more friendly to Republicans with the exception of Illinois (which has done the reverse and has become less friendly) and Iowa (which just does its own thing)

      1. Q Continuum

        Gaining Wisc, Mich and Ohio (maybe even Minn at some point) more than makes up for the loss of Colorado and Virginia.

        1. Chipwooder

          Only if you don’t live in Virginia.

          1. Spartan Dad

            Preach

            Last night’s email from the VCDL:

            WE’VE BEEN BLUE BEFORE

            Think Virginia has turned blue for the first time? Hardly. When I first became involved in what was then the Northern Virginia Citizens Defense League, the Democrats controlled BOTH the House and the Senate, while Virginia had a Republican governor (George Allen). The Speaker of the House was Democrat Tom Moss who represented Norfolk. Pro-rights bills were killed with regularity in the House Militia & Police committee, while anti-gun bills sailed out. Even in that environment, NVCDL got “Shall Issue” passed into law. NVCDL, and later, VCDL, were able to stop most of the gun-control bills. That said, there were more pro-rights Democrats in the General Assembly in those days.

            Sadly, when the Republicans had control of the House, the Senate, and the Governorship, they slow-walked pro-gun bills so as to not pass too many at a time and even quashed good bills deemed “controversial.” The Democrats will have no such artificial limitation placed on their gun-control bills, nor will they care if the bills are controversial.

            GUN CONTROL WILL BE COMING AT US HARD AND HEAVY

            The gun-control dangers are now more pronounced. Things which we will be seeing pushed with renewed vigor include:

            * One-Handgun-a-Month reinstatement
            * An “assault weapon” ban
            * A “high” capacity magazine ban
            * Universal Background Checks
            * Prohibition on carry in state agencies given teeth (right now it is merely a trespass charge if a person refuses to leave)
            * Expand the list of misdemeanors that make someone a “prohibited person” in order to disarm more and more people
            * Firearm Protective Order that will allow for the confiscation of firearms based merely on the word of another, without any due process or even notification prior to confiscation

          2. R C Dean

            Of those, I can see an argument for two not being unconstitutional.

            Prohibition on carry in state agencies as an exercise of property rights.

            Expanded list of prohibited person.

            And I can also think of arguments why even those two are unconstitutional.

          3. Spartan Dad

            VCDL has lawyers on staff and has taken several local governments to court before, usually always winning. I don’t know if they’ve proceeded with legal action against the state, but I imagine this will be an actively considered tool moving forward.

            One positive area of demographics change is that the number of VA concealed permit holders increased to 450,000 from just a few thousand in the 1995. I don’t know why they didn’t vote, but I would hope that forcing too much gun control would mobilize this group into being an election breaker.

          4. Viking1865

            “One positive area of demographics change is that the number of VA concealed permit holders increased to 450,000 from just a few thousand in the 1995. I don’t know why they didn’t vote, but I would hope that forcing too much gun control would mobilize this group into being an election breaker.”

            They did. 200,000 felons with their rights restored also voted. The millions of parasites in Northern Virginia who depend on big government also vote.

            They’re gonna put a full time professional legislature in now, and fix the “gerry mandering” so that Fairfax and Loudon can rule the whole state.

          5. not pass too many at a time and even quashed good bills deemed “controversial.”

            This manoeuvre later came to be known as “The Paul Ryan.”

          6. Q Continuum

            You know who else came at you hard and heavy?

          7. Scruffy Nerfherder

            Ron Jeremy?

          8. Q Continuum

            Almost as bad (<—-Colorado). At least we have mountains and we do have an influx of Texans that slightly offsets the plague of Kali-refugees.

          9. B.P.

            You are in denial. Denver voters just passed that damn green roof initiative. We will be Seattle/San Francisco in 15 years, tops. This town will be rich people and homeless shitting in the streets. All the schmucks who came here and voted for the same things they fled will say, “How’d that happen?”

  48. Vhyrus

    For Kristin: A police car chase set to Cuphead music.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Ws1j8A6LlE

    1. ChipsnSalsa

      too funny, guy try’s to pull a “Jackie Chan” over the fence and doesn’t

  49. Lackadaisical

    Regarding the ferret being killed in the oven, to be sure it is a disgusting crime, but this stood out to me:

    “To lose a ferret is like losing a kid,” Murray said. “I just can’t believe she did that.”

    No it is not you disgusting piece of filth. I’m really sick of people who think they are ‘fur moms’ or any other such bullshit. Your disgusting flea infested pets are not equivalent to children. I would say “I hope these people never breed”, but I don’t think I have to worry about it.

    1. Q Continuum

      How is your niece doing?

      1. Lackadaisical

        Okay, per my brother. He is always very scant on details, so that is about all I know.

        1. Q Continuum

          Good to know. Is she on any meds? Maybe switching them around would help? I don’t have a lot of experience with these types of situations.

    2. One of my cats died two days ago. Had him for fifteen years. Very sweet, and I loved him dearly. I definitely shed some tears over it. But there’s not even a question as to where he ranks in relation to my daughter. I think there are people who believe that if you don’t love your pet as much as your own flesh and blood, then you must hate it. That’s crazy. If one of my dogs was killed I’d be devastated, but I’d get over it. If my daughter was killed I’d never be able to get past it. I cannot imagine a worse thing. That doesn’t mean I don’t love my dogs, it just means I love my child more.

      1. Yusef drives a Kia

        Sorry about your kittah, that had to hurt, I lost my first Wife 32 years ago, you never get over it.

      2. RJD

        I have been an avid pet owner, dog trainer, and more. I lost my daughter 20+ years ago, and I can tell you, you never get over it.

      3. RJD

        long time lurker, here and tos, felt the need to comment on this 🙂

        1. jesse.in.mb

          Hey, just saw the new comment pending moderation. I hope we didn’t leave you in the box too long. Comments should go up automatically from now on.

          1. RJD

            I’m good. understand why new commenters need to be moderated

  50. Count Potato

    “A selection of statistics on crimes ranging from assault to firearms offences show the scale of the problem:

    1,229,260 offences of violence against the person, an increase of 19 per cent on the previous year.
    129,700 sexual offences, an increase of 19 per cent on the previous year.
    45,100 rapes, an increase of 22 per cent on the previous year.
    36,998 offences involving a knife or sharp instrument, an increase of 26 per cent on the previous year.
    6,696 offences involving firearms, an increase of 27 per cent on the previous year — despite draconian controls on legal gun-ownership.

    London is also the epicentre for some of the most headline-grabbing crimes, including acid attacks and terrorism-related offences.”

    http://www.breitbart.com/london/2017/11/08/teenager-disembowelled-bicycle-killers-crime-stricken-london/

    TW: Breitbart

    WTF England?

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      I’m sure it has nothing to do with refugees from certain countries.

      1. F. Stupidity Jr.

        Probably the Alt-Right.

    2. Lackadaisical

      45,100 rapes, an increase of 22 per cent on the previous year

      I really hope they are using a ‘she regretted it after’ definition of rape, even 20% less seems atrocious. Maybe STEPHEN SMYTH lives in London?

    3. Q Continuum

      I say again, Breitbart is openly biased, but they are one of the few outlets doing real journalism. Where else would you see this? Even (especially?) UK rags wouldn’t cover this.

    4. straffinrun

      Imagine how bad it would be if they had guns. (That was painful to type even in sarc/ mode).

    5. Suthenboy

      Less than a year ago some Limeys told me I was crazy for asserting that England is crime infested despite their draconian control over any object that could be conceivably used as a weapon. Dunces.

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      Way too easy and obvious a joke.

    2. Q Continuum

      How Vice has fallen since he left.

        1. Lackadaisical

          STEVE SMITH APPLY FOR THIS POSITION, THEY SAY I NOT GOOD FIT.

          BY APPLY MEAN RAPE.

        2. Q Continuum

          “Tinder didn’t used to have your job title, and then they turned it on one day without telling anyone, so suddenly my success rate dropped,” he said. “I think people thought I was making a gross joke. Like ‘bikini inspector’ or ‘sex whatever.’ I mean, I get it. It’s a weird job title.”

          Cause you couldn’t just put “product tester” instead. *eye roll*

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        I miss Vice from when he was there. It was excellent journalism, even with a libertarian-ish bent. It’s now… well, you posted that link, that’s what it is now.

    3. F. Stupidity Jr.

      *looks at picture*

      Is that…is that sloopy??

    4. straffinrun

      Recognize Obama’s face and Michelle’s grunts. Baaad three way.

      1. Q Continuum

        Throw Hillary in there and you’ve got medieval torture.

      2. Juvenile Bluster

        Well, there goes my breakfast.

        1. straffinrun

          Hopefully you can recognize it.

    1. Q Continuum

      Does she have a dreamhouse?

    2. straffinrun

      In the age of the internet and she demands not to be called Climate Barbie. There’s stupid and then there’s that.

      1. TIL there’s some blonde chick in Canada called Climate Barbie who doesn’t like it and who has apparently never heard of the Streisand Effect.

      2. Suthenboy

        Who else would be Minister of Environment and Climate Change? They picked her for the same reason the military wont take anyone over 27: gullibility. It doesnt take a brain trust to parrot talking points.

    3. Chipwooder

      Climate Barbie claims to ride a bike to work in heels, apparently, and also drives a super-green Porsche Cayenne

      1. Lackadaisical

        All those cars seemed really expensive, t hen I remembered it is probably denominated in funny money.

    4. Chipwooder

      Climate Barbie is a keen wildlife enthusiast

      1. ChipsnSalsa

        Puffin has a sadz

  51. Grummun

    A black day in history (it was actually yesterday): 100 years ago, Bolsheviks stage a coup d’etat against the Russian Provisional Government in St. Petersburg (not Petrograd, you commie pricks). Lenin and Trotsky assume power, replacing Kerenski as Premier and Tereshchenko as Foreign Minister respectively.

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      Today is a better day in history. The day the Berlin Wall came down (in a metaphorical sense).

      Günter Schabowski, the party boss in East Berlin and the spokesman for the SED Politburo, had the task of announcing the new regulations. However, he had not been involved in the discussions about the new regulations and had not been fully updated. Shortly before a press conference on 9 November, he was handed a note announcing the changes, but given no further instructions on how to handle the information. These regulations had only been completed a few hours earlier and were to take effect the following day, so as to allow time to inform the border guards. But this starting time delay was not communicated to Schabowski.

      At the end of the press conference, Schabowski read out loud the note he had been given. One of the reporters, ANSA’s Riccardo Ehrman, asked when the regulations would take effect. After a few seconds’ hesitation, Schabowski assumed it would be the same day based on the wording of the note and replied, “As far as I know, it takes effect immediately, without delay. After further questions from journalists, he confirmed that the regulations included the border crossings through the Wall into West Berlin, which he had not mentioned until then.

      Excerpts from Schabowski’s press conference were the lead story on West Germany’s two main news programs that night—at 7:17 p.m. on ZDF’s heute and at 8 p.m. on ARD’s Tagesschau. This, of course, meant that the news was broadcast to nearly all of East Germany as well. Later that night, on ARD’s Tagesthemen, anchorman Hanns Joachim Friedrichs proclaimed, “This 9 November is a historic day. The GDR has announced that, starting immediately, its borders are open to everyone. The gates in the Wall stand open wide.”

      After hearing the broadcast, East Germans began gathering at the Wall, at the six checkpoints between East and West Berlin, demanding that border guards immediately open the gates. The surprised and overwhelmed guards made many hectic telephone calls to their superiors about the problem. At first, they were ordered to find the “more aggressive” people gathered at the gates and stamp their passports with a special stamp that barred them from returning to East Germany—in effect, revoking their citizenship. However, this still left thousands of people demanding to be let through “as Schabowski said we can”.

      It soon became clear that no one among the East German authorities would take personal responsibility for issuing orders to use lethal force, so the vastly outnumbered soldiers had no way to hold back the huge crowd of East German citizens. Finally, at 10:45 p.m., Harald Jäger, the commander of the Bornholmer Straße border crossing yielded, allowing for the guards to open the checkpoints and allowing people through with little or no identity checking. As the Ossis swarmed through, they were greeted by Wessis waiting with flowers and champagne amid wild rejoicing. Soon afterward, a crowd of West Berliners jumped on top of the Wall, and were soon joined by East German youngsters. They danced together to celebrate their new freedom.

      1. Suthenboy

        And then the idiots turned around and elected and re-elected Angela Merkel. Angela Merkel is a marxist to the bone, trained up in an east german brainwashing center.

        1. Juvenile Bluster

          Hey, I didn’t say it turned out well for Germany.

        2. spqr2008

          It is still Germany, after all. Tragic consequences of relatively good things happening are kind of a historical pattern there. See also, Protestant Reformation –> Wars of religion and Thirty Year’s War.

        3. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

          Whatever happened to Helmut Kohl?

      1. Q Continuum

        Can’t get enough of it.

      2. Juvenile Bluster

        I saw someone argue that this is proof that the President is a Nazi because “victims of Communism” is a thing Nazis sometimes use to downplay the crimes of Nazi Germany.

        1. Suthenboy

          To put things into perspective the Nazi soldiers that invaded the Ukraine had been told for a decade about the Soviet Paradise but when they actually got there, and I get this firsthand from one who was there-

          “We were horrified at what we saw.”

          National Socialists and International Socialists pointing fingers at each other. That’s rich.

    2. John Titor

      Uh, you mean Leningrad. St. Petersburg’s name was changed to Petrograd in 1914 to eliminate its German influence.

  52. Count Potato

    “For example, Hazen says the AK-47 — and its semiautomatic variants — is a “far more wicked gun than an AR-15.” The AK-47 variants can hold just as many rounds as the AR-15, are more reliable and use larger 7.62 mm rounds as opposed to the standard AR-15’s .223 rounds.”

    Bostonian or animist retard?

    https://twitter.com/USATODAY/status/928343873000054784

    1. Q Continuum

      Target doesn’t care.

      1. Count Potato

        Not even the chainsaw?

    2. Chipwooder

      that twitter thread is golden

    3. …wicked like “wicked awesome”?

      The reliability thing is a canard. I can’t speak to the M4 or milspec AKs, but in the civilian market ARs and AKs are equally reliable assuming they’re built right. The platforms themselves don’t differ in that regard, at least. And while the 7.62×39 is a gnarly round that does bad things to human bodies, the argument is made the 5.56 is easier to shoot as it tends to generate less recoil and, being smaller and lighter, allow a person to carry more of them at a time. And as reasonable people frequently point out in discussions about various kinds of rounds, nobody likes to get shot with anything.

      1. Q Continuum

        First generation M16s in the 60s had reliability issues. Direct impingement is a little dirtier and requires more lubrication than piston operated, but there are now very few differences in reliability.

        1. Stinky Wizzleteats

          From what I understand AKs function better than ARs if they’re being abused-not adequately cleaned, not adequately lubed, etc. A well serviced AR should be just as reliable as an AK though.

          1. Q Continuum

            Correct.

        2. I’d read recently that in the civilian DI ARs you just aren’t going to see the same amount of use that would reveal any reliability difference between those and pistons. Like, if you’re taking it out to a range on the weekends and clean it when you get home you’ll never see a difference. I don’t know myself, all my scary black rifles are piston systems.

          1. That’s likely true. Having never shot a full-auto AR or been in the military I can’t say for sure but it makes sense. It’s easy to clean, just remove the bolt carrier and give it a good scrub down, lube it up and off you go.

          2. R C Dean

            These euphemisms could stand to be a little more abstract.

          3. l0b0t

            It’s easy to clean

            Sigh… {long suppressed memories of endless, mind-numbing, finger-hurting hours of misery in front of the arms room comes flooding back; twitching ensues}.

      2. thepasswordispassword

        AK in 5.56. Reliability, less recoil, more rounds all in one convenient package.

  53. R C Dean

    The AK-47 variants can hold just as many rounds as the AR-15

    Umm, duh.

    are more reliable

    I suspect that varies by maker, but Vhyrus could probably give us a more informed opinion.

    and use larger 7.62 mm rounds as opposed to the standard AR-15’s .223 rounds.

    OK, they are “larger”. But there is an army of .223 adherents who will vehemently argue that the .223 has better terminal ballistics.

    1. Ken Shultz

      There’s an AR-10 for .308

      The arguments I’ve seen online between the two rounds had to do with, I think, weight of the rifle, accuracy at distance, and something to do with fragmentation.

      I’d love an expert opinion on that latter point, as well. Who knows if what you read online is real.

      The larger rounds are more accurate at range, but you have to carry around more weight, was how the story went.

      The AR-15 isn’t as accurate out past hundreds of yards, but you don’t generally need it to be that effective at range, and less weight means you pack other gear.

      The other question was about, I believe, the Geneva conventions. I believe there’s something in there about fragmenting bullets being against international law. So, the argument went, the military can’t use especially effective ammunition, but civilians can–so why not use something that weighs less, is as accurate at any distance a sane person needs it to be, and uses more effective ammunition than they use in the military?

      Like I said, I’m framing the arguments I read–not vouching for them. I’d love to read a authoritative evaluation of all that.

      1. Chipwooder

        wait…are you saying an AR isn’t as accurate at longer range as an AK? Because that’s not right.

        1. Count Potato

          I think he is saying .308 is more accurate than .223 past hundreds of yards. Which is true.

          1. Chipwooder

            Aha, I misunderstood. Yes, .308 is definitely a longer range cartridge.

        2. Vhyrus

          I get what he’s saying but he didn’t quite say it right. He’s talking about 308. 308 holds its velocity for longer so it has more range and theoretically better accuracy at range. 7.62 x 39 has basically the same size bullet (slightly lighter) but a much lower powder charge so it lacks the range and consistency of either 5.56 or 308.

          1. R C Dean

            He’s talking about 308. 308 holds its velocity for longer so it has more range and theoretically better accuracy at range.

            My impression is that .308 is still the sniper round of choice (when you aren’t using .50 BMG or a wildcat), which leads me to believe it is the more accurate, especially at very long ranges.

          2. The thing I keep seeing in Internet forums, those bastions of reliable information, is that the 7.62×39’s lower charge and larger size means that when it hits tissue it’s moving slower and transfers more energy, making for more grievous wounds, whereas the 5.56 is a smaller, faster round designed primarily to incapacitate rather than kill. Obviously not that people don’t die from 5.56 wounds, but that you’re making a trade-off between more accurate, more portable ammo that takes someone out of the fight and less accurate, heavier ammo more likely to result in lethal wounds.

          3. R C Dean

            My purely anecdotal experience, based on a handful of data points (deer and pigs), is that fast-moving lighter bullets (even those designed to expand/fragment) can drill a perfectly round hole right through the target leaving a perfect .30 cal exit wound, but heavier bullets expand much more reliably (one rather large pig had an exit wound that was probably six inches in diameter). I switched out the ammo on my .300 because I wasn’t getting the terminal performance I wanted with relatively light bullets, and saw much better terminal performance from the heavier ones. The bullet design was also different, so there’s that as well.

            YMMV.

          4. Suthenboy

            First hand experience: 7.62 x 39 at 600 yards – point of aim directly on target, the bullet lands about 75 yards short on flat ground. Use the sight elevator and you can hit a 5 gallon bucket with open sights without too much trouble but the bullet takes nearly a full second to arrive on target. Those 125 grain bullets are light, slow down fast but can still reach out there is you push it. Oh, they have a low ballistic coefficient so they stabilize very quickly, inside 50 yards. It is a very effective round inside of 400 yards but the effectiveness drops off quickly after that.

            .223 with heavy bullets (60 grains plus) has a high ballistic coefficient and holds velocity better. It starts out faster and stays faster. I can hit a 6×3 foot target at 1000 yards with a scope nearly every time after I range the gun/load on flat ground. At shorter ranges being hit by an unstable bullet with a thin jacket at 3000+ fps is devastating. At longer ranges, not so much. It just makes a pinhole.

            308 is nearly as effective as the 30-06. 1000 yards is easier than with a .223 an a bigger, better bullet (168 gr. boat tail hollow points) hold their velocity better, buck wind better and hit one hell of a lot harder.

            Get a real gun, a 7mm Rem Mag or 300 Win Mag or bigger. For shooting at long range I prefer the 7mm, 338 Win mag and the 375 H&H Mag. The 375 really shines. A bullet twice as large performs more than twice as well at range.

            If your goal is to dump a lot of lead as quickly as possible at short range a Ruger 10-22 is hard to beat. Fast, no recoil, carry a shit ton of bullets, high cap mags, doesnt heat up as fast, effective round at short range. Don’t underestimate the 22lr. They penetrate well, mushroom easily and easily crush bone. We haven’t even started talking about shotguns yet…

            I find all of this disturbing. I grew up i n a world where everyone had guns but almost nobody thought about shooting other humans. We hunted and did a lot of sport shooting. Guns made specifically for shooting people were held mostly in disdain. This trend of people-shooting guns being so popular bothers me.

          5. tacticalpillow

            Bullet weight is a factor of BC, along with drag profile. Together they determine velocity loss over a flight path.

            Heavier, more streamlined bullets have a huge advantage at range over light, blunt bullets.

        3. Ken Shultz

          Should have been more specific.

          The AR-10 is more accurate at range than the AR-15.

          For instance, here’s Nutnfancy at 700 yards.

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qTg-XLP0n-M

          I believe the other observations about weight and the AK-47 are all on.

          Regardless, please note, I’m asking questions in that post–not presenting myself as an authority.

          . . . but my understanding is that AR-10s, shooting a .308, is more accurate at longer distances.

          Downside, they’re heavier, etc.

          1. tacticalpillow

            By “accurate” you mean able to more consistently hit targets without as much correction for wind and elevation adjustments. Guns have an accuracy cone that expand linearly in a vacuum. Misses at range are most likely caused by improper adjustments for elevation and wind drift.

            /pedant

      2. Dr Mossy Lawn

        The classic AK round is 7.62×39… the .308 round is 7.62×51. much more powder. The 7.62×39 is an intermediate round similar in style to the 5.56.

        And there are rules about HP and fragmenting bullets, but the 5.56 system doesn’t run afoul of them.

        1. Ken Shultz

          About the fragmenting bullets . . . point being that civilians can use them, hence giving them another advantage over the AR-10.

          That would seem to make them more competitive than the AK-47, as well, if you think the AK has better stopping power and does more damage with a larger round. That advantage is at least not as much if an AR-15 can use more damaging ammo.

    2. Vhyrus

      *lands dramatically, shoots out vhyrus signal with a well placed shot*

      Standard capacity for the AR and AK are identical, but the AR has 100 round drums available for it, and the largest drums I know of for the AK are 75 rounds. They do make belt fed AKs which make the point a bit moot though.

      The reliability thing has been beaten to death. If we were still in the 60s I would say that yes the AK is more reliable, but based on what I have seen a modern AR should be able to go toe to toe with an AK on round count.

      The caliber thing is a bit tricky. Bigger bullets make bigger holes, but the 5.56 is designed to fragment, causing significant wounding. This fragmentation only happens above certain velocities however. You can say that the AK round is the more consistent of the two, but it also has less range and considered to be less accurate. Close range I would take the AK. Medium range is definitely AR.

      1. ChipsnSalsa

        You give out that knowledge for free? What are you some kind of commie?

        1. Q Continuum

          You don’t want to know what he expects in return… let’s just say I hope you have a relaxed jaw and are good at swallowing large quantities of viscous fluid.

      2. Count Potato

        The cartridge itself is accurate, like any thirty caliber rifle round. It’s that the AK has loose tolerances, no good way to mount optics, etc.

      3. kinnath

        And what would be the relative value, or lack of value, of the pistol caliber carbines on the market today?

        1. Q Continuum

          Longer barrel = more velocity.

        2. Dr Mossy Lawn

          What is the mission?..

          Personally:

          Pistol, because it can always be on your person. Pick one, practice with it.
          Full sized Rifle: Pick one, for when you need to reach out and have the distance. AR, ? AK? 308? 30-06? .303? 7mm mauser don’t care.. just have one.

          Anything else?.. Why?

          As civilians we don’t need to worry about large engagements, weight of ammo etc.. All of those intermediate firearms are specialty uses, tactical events where a full size rifle doesn’t work.

          That said I’d love to have a MP5 “for the fun”..

          1. kinnath

            What is the mission?..

            I guess that is actually the question I was trying to ask. What is the mission of a pistol caliber carbine? Why do they exist compared to other classic rifles?

          2. Count Potato

            There are two established reasons. One is full-auto (eg. Thompson .45).

            The other is so that someone could carry a lever-action rifle and a revolver that take the same ammo.

          3. Bobarian LMD

            FN P90 and the FiveseveN are a modern example.

          4. Dr Mossy Lawn

            Historically? places where a full size rifle didn’t work… So the M1carbine was for “tanks”.

            Thompson? MP40? Sten, UZI, MP5 etc?.. full auto for close in engagements. Trenches, Room clearing etc. the BAR is a beast.

            So there is really no mission for a pistol caliber semi-auto rifle. The theory would be, I can’t have/carry my full size rifle, but I want more power than a pistol, and I’m not allowed to have burst/full auto. That seems like a very small niche.

          5. kinnath

            Thanks for the background information

          6. Raston Bot

            AR pistols are like flying cars. it’s either a shitty car or a shitty plane.. but still a ton of fun.

          7. RegicidalManiac

            My understanding is that the advent of pistol “braces” have turned AR pistols from useless gimmicks to decent versions of particularly short carbines.

            That’s assuming 5.56 or similar rifle rounds, of course. Can’t speak for pistol caliber ARs.

          8. tacticalpillow

            and just skull-crushingly loud

        3. Suthenboy

          They are pistol calibers. Having said that I have 2 – 44 magnum rifles: A Ruger carbine and a Winchester ’94. The ’94 has a longer barrel (24″). Both rifles are highly effective on medium game inside 200 yards.

          30 carbine? It is great in a pistol, worthless in a rifle.

          1. Count Potato

            I thought a “30 carbine” was a 30-30 lever action.

            Anyway, as you know, most 32 caliber cartridges are relatively weak, except 327 Federal. Which would make a decent rifle in theory.

      4. tacticalpillow

        I missed a long range shooting/rifle thread. Damn job.

  54. CPRM

    While we wait for the overlords to post the continuing story of Harvey Weinstein and Ted Nugent I cooked up a little something for the late nighters last night. Reposting the prologue here for your enjoyment.

    INT-PRODUCTION OFFICE—NIGHT

    SUPER: 1996

    MATT and BEN break through the door, carrying SALLY. Sally is bound and gagged.

    MATT
    Harvey, we got her. Get your ass out here!

    A toilet flushes and HARVEY emerges from the bathroom. Ben kicks the door to the office shut behind them.

    BEN
    This bitch was hawd to get. She’s wicked strong.

    Harvey wipes his hands on his pants and approaches.

    HARVEY
    Were you seen?

    MATT
    Naw.

    BEN
    We’re wicked good at dis.

    Ben and Matt set Sally down in a chair. Harvey drops his pants and grabs his cock.

    MATT
    Hey, we don’t gotta see dis.

    HARVEY
    You want your movie made? That fucking piece of shit about a fucking janitor who thinks he’s smart because he has a good memory?

    BEN
    Absofuckinloutly.

    MATT
    Fuckin A.

    HARVEY
    Then you gotta watch.

    MATT
    Hey, dat wasn’t paht ah the deal.

    HARVEY
    I can get you Robin Williams. Robin fucking Williams.

    BEN
    Matt, hold her down.

    MATT
    But…I don’t want cum ta git on my clothes.

    BEN
    Then take em off.

    MATT
    OK.

    Matt and Ben hold sally down and cheer Harvey on as the crime begins.

    1. Q Continuum

      I’m waiting for the horrific description of Harvey’s shriveled, diseased genitals with baited breath.

      1. Bobarian LMD

        You mean ‘bated breath?

    2. Just Say’n

      That’s wicked smawt

    3. straffinrun

      I respect the vigor you’ve applied to this series.

  55. Nephilium

    Balko’s old beat… and if this quote is correct, rage-inducing:

    “He said I had to shoot her she came at me. Then, he said, ‘It’s really a shame I had to waste that bullet because it’s a really expensive bullet,’” said Sullivan, recounting the event.

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      Officer probably went home and jerked off afterwards. Sounds like he’s enough of a sociopath to get off on that sort of thing.

    2. Suthenboy

      Ugh. Evangeline Parish again? What the hell is with them?

      Three years ago two stray dogs attacked and killed a woman in Pollock, La. Here in Grant parish people are nervous about dogs because of that incident but I dont think the cops here have shot a dog for as long as I can remember.

      1. Q Continuum

        LOL

      2. Grumbletarian

        “there had better be earth shattering kabooms”

        LOL

  56. A Fuggin White Male

    Which one of you deplorables had the theory that any institution that is not explicitly and openly conservative/libertarian will eventually drift left and eventually go full prog???? Is there a name for this theory?

    I’ve spent the last few weeks thinking about it, looking at all the institutions around me. And I’m really having a hard time refuting it.

    1. Q Continuum
      1. A Fuggin White Male

        Thank you.

    2. blighted_non_millenial

      First heard it on Rush Limbaugh years ago, not sure who actually said it first.

    3. F. Stupidity Jr.

      Robert Conquest’s Three Laws of Politics
      Friday, July 11th, 2008
      Robert Conquest’s Three Laws of Politics:

      Everyone is conservative about what he knows best.
      Any organization not explicitly right-wing sooner or later becomes left-wing.
      The simplest way to explain the behavior of any bureaucratic organization is to assume that it is controlled by a cabal of its enemies.

      http://www.isegoria.net/2008/07/robert-conquests-three-laws-of-politics/

    4. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

      I’ve actually got a working model of why this is after spending some time with Haidt’s research. Presuming his models are correct, they form a solid basis that would predict the leftward drift of institutions and nations. I should probably write something on that.

  57. Q Continuum

    Replying to myself, Obama-style, the reason the Right is winning right now (and why they’re so much more fun) is that the Left has gone from being the cool counterculture to a cadre of Puritanical, humorless scolds. Which group would you rather be a part of? The ones putting Velociraptors on the handguard of an AR or a group shutting down speeches?

    Standard libertarian disclaimer: I don’t want to be a part of any “group” but I definitely want to keep my sense of humor.

    1. Count Potato

      “The left can’t meme.”

    2. antisthenes

      You can add virulently racist, sexist, and bigoted, prone to violence, and willing to protect criminals and prevent their victims from getting justice, in order to maintain their domination, wealth, and status.

      Basically, they’re just straight-up evil in every way that matters.

      1. Suthenboy

        That is correct.

        Paraphrased:

        “Why are the useful idiots the first ones up against the wall?”

        “When the demoralized see the reality of their beautiful world of social justice and equality, they wont like it very much. They will become dissidents and dissent cannot be allowed. This is about power, nothing else, so they are squashed like cockroaches.”

  58. Count Potato

    “7 Things I Learned At The Women’s Convention About Feminists And Abortion

    In one panel we attended, a post-abortive woman (times six) and clinic worker at the Houston Women’s Center named Kenya Martin stated that “Abortion should be no different than having a tooth pulled.” She even said women should throw “abortion parties” the day they have an abortion and rent “party buses” to celebrate their “decision.” Yes, she really said that.

    The abortion industry is no longer hiding behind their “family planning” services. They are super proud of the abortions they commit. One woman in a panel, who worked for Planned Parenthood, even said Planned Parenthood should stop saying abortion is “only 3 percent of their services.” She said Planned Parenthood shouldn’t try to hide that the “majority of what they do in the clinics is to provide abortions.” Another thing I learned: these women are super honest about what the abortion industry is all about when they think no pro-lifers are around.”

    http://thefederalist.com/2017/11/07/7-things-learned-womens-convention-feminists-abortion/#.WgNGM9Mjpb8.twitter

    1. F. Stupidity Jr.

      But they’re totes valuable to low-income women with families, which no one should have anyway. /Nikki

    2. R C Dean

      Planned Parenthood should stop saying abortion is “only 3 percent of their services.”

      I speculate that number relies on a technicality – the abortion providers are not PP employees, but are either independents who get abortions referred from PP, or employed by a separate affiliated corporation.

      Abortion should be no different than having a tooth pulled

      You mean, people shouldn’t have abortions unless something wrong with the fetus?

      I have to think there is something wrong with somebody who has 6 abortions and thinks they are a great thing. My impression is that normal people experience abortions as, at best, a regrettable necessity. From what I understand, many women come to see their abortions as a mistake, and regret it for the rest of their lives.

      But, yeah, the whole “safe, legal and rare” thing is in their rearview mirror, isn’t it. I suspect they never really meant it, anyway.

      1. “But, yeah, the whole “safe, legal and rare” thing is in their rearview mirror, isn’t it.”

        This is for the best. It’s the same with their open desire to repeal 2A and confiscate; at least they’re being honest about their position. We know they won’t debate it in good faith, but they’re not lying about the goal anymore.

      2. Thymirus

        I knew of somebody who got herself pregnant, refused to entertain the option of aborting the fetus, told her parents of the pregnancy, and her parents agreed to take primary responsibility for the child so that she could attend college and make a career for herself.

        It’s understandable that people make mistakes, but it’s essential to learn from them.

        1. R C Dean

          I knew of somebody who got herself pregnant

          Hit by a bus?

          1. Thymirus

            She became a rancid cunt and alienated her entire social circle, which is how I knew of her, so nobody knows where she went, or how her life turned out. Her parents were wealthy, and she had them wrapped around her little finger, so I don’t think hardship was ever in the cards for her.

    3. Six fucking abortions? Just get your tubes tied FFS.

      1. R C Dean

        I think its pretty clear there’s something going on in her head that makes her enjoy abortions.

      2. Thymirus

        An implant, or even a coil, are easier options. My previous girlfriend had a coil, and my fiancee has an implant. No pregnancies have occurred in five years of sex, and I never wear condoms.

        These precautions aren’t difficult to implement. People are just retarded.

      3. Scruffy Nerfherder

        It’s fucking sick.

      4. Raston Bot

        her uterus is going to revolt and switch itself to “off”, then we’ll read about her crying how she can’t have children without PP’s medical procedures.

  59. Thymirus

    http://www.detroitnews.com/story/news/politics/2017/11/08/michigan-senate-guns-schools-churches/107472272/

    Mich. Senate OKs guns in schools, churches, preschools

    Lansing — Despite outcry from Democrats and school groups, people could carry concealed guns inside schools, bars, preschools, churches and other places where they’re currently prohibited under a plan the Senate approved Wednesday.

    The Republican-led Senate approved the bills in a series of 26-11 and 25-12 votes along party lines. Sen. Marty Knollenberg of Troy was the only Republican to vote no — on Senate Majority Leader Arlan Meekhof’s bill to allow guns in currently gun-free zones, including bars, arenas, stadiums, hospitals and casinos, at the discretion of the private property owner.

    ——————-

    WAAAAAAAAH.

    /Democrats and RINOs.

    1. If only our FedPubs had spine like that.

    2. R C Dean

      Sounds veto-proof in the Senate, assuming nobody flips.

      What are the prospects in the House?

      1. Thymirus

        The Republicans number 63 in the House of Representatives, with 45 Democrats opposing them. Perhaps this bill will actually make it into law, though I’m always skeptical.

        1. R C Dean

          Not veto-proof, I assume.

          I would bet Gov. Snyder is a squish and will veto (could be wrong) and the veto will be upheld in the House.

          1. Thymirus

            There’s infinitely too much blue in Michigan to guarantee legislation of this nature will become law. It’s a gamble.

            Even when sincere, principled, small-country Republicans manage to propose and further good legislation, Democrats and RINOs usually find a a way to sour the situation and ruin the advance of freedom.

    1. Thymirus

      “BREAKING NEWS: Bruce Willis once scratched his balls on the set of ‘Die Hard’, according to a cameraman who witnessed the event and reportedly suffered from PTSD as a result.”

    2. Chipwooder

      Hey now!

    1. Suthenboy

      30 women? I think they caught one just like that in Alaska a while back that they guessed had hundreds of victims.

  60. Winston

    Old news but come on:

    https://dailytimes.com.pk/134088/kevin-spacey-will-not-receive-international-emmy-award/

    It was announced in June that Spacey would be recognized as “one of the great multi-dimensional talents” who “crosses cultural boundaries to touch humanity” at the 45th International Emmy Awards Gala on November 20 in New York City.

    1. R C Dean

      crosses cultural boundaries to touch humanity

      Euphemism confirmed!

      1. Microaggressor

        I was about to point that out. Fucking poetic.

  61. The Late P Brooks

    This big excitement about CNN makes no sense at all, to me. Donald Fucking Trump is not personally taking charge of anti trust policy at the DoJ. The people there have been there since BOOOOSH, more than likely. If Trumputin called the Trust Busters in and sicced them on a specific company (no matter their ownership, political predilections or market share), there would be leakers climbing over each other to get the word out.

  62. The Late P Brooks

    In fact, I would not be at all surprised if somebody at ATT is throwing chum in the water to see if anybody shows up to “rescue” those embattled do-gooders at CNN.