Not enough for the whole class, I see…
This is my review of Platform (Cleveland, OH) Smokin Fineapple Gose.
I was graciously given the day off by my employer in observance of Veteran’s Day. I took the day mostly to hang out with my kids and on my way home I noticed the FEDEX truck driving around my neighborhood. Way to work it on a Federal holiday, FEDEX!
I got my box, fed my kids, and let the sender know the Maguffin arrived. Then I tore it open! I got some schwag: stickers, a new pint glass, a D-ring/keychain. Somewhere in there was some beer. Hat Tip of all hat tips: Nephilium.
Immediately the Gose caught my attention. I’ve had a few that were made with lemon but pineapple seemed a bit off for this style. I decided that I’ve trusted the judgement of others only to come back with a sour apple martini so I dismissed these fears and put it on ice.
This link here has a few methods on cooling beer in a few minutes time, some without electricity. The absolute fastest way to chill a beer without electricity is to take a disposable tupperware container large enough to hold the can/bottle. Poke a couple holes in the sides and in the center of the lid. Put the beverage into the container and ‘seal’ it. Then take a can of compressed air and insert the straw attachment into the hole in the lid. Invert the can of compressed air and go to town. You may want to wear gloves. It should take only a minute of two to empty the can but the results will be chilling. So in the event of the apocalypse we all can still have a cold drink. Thankfully, I don’t live in Somalia so the refrigerator sufficed.
The Gose is sour but the pineapple has a nice subtle sweetness to it to counter it. It also has sea salt floating in the mix so the result reminds me a bit of grilled pineapple. Its pretty good, but I was wrong about this one being the most interesting thing in the box. Platform Smokin Fineapple Gose: 3/5
Others in the box included:
Masthead American IPA
Fat Head Sunshine Daydream IPA
Masthead American IPA: 3.2/5 The head says it all, it has a lot of body and delightfully floral.
Fat Head Sunshine Daydream IPA. 3/5. I had this one the next night in observance of fight night, for obvious reasons. It was better than majority of that card.
Millersburg Brewing Panther Hollow Vanilla Porter
Hoppin Frog Infusion A Coffee Porter
Millersburg Brewing Panther Hollow Vanilla Porter 4.5/5. Hell yeah! Go find it, right now. Don’t worry you can record your college football game and/or Man City (probably) won. Don’t hesitate to get a six-pack.
Hoppin Frog Infusion A Coffee Porter: 3.8/5. A bit more bite than expected but overall is solid. It’s like a light imperial stout.
Finally the most interesting thing in the box, not just because it’s watching you.
Saucy Fauxbia White Stout
This one calls itself a ‘white stout’ so go ahead and insert an appropriation joke. The malts are roasted with a high intensity heat that doesn’t seem to alter its color. It’s like grilling chicken with too much flame, where the outside looks good but the inside is raw. The result is something akin to a nice bitters with a smoky finish. Do you like Scotch Whisky? You’ll probably like this. Saucy Fauxbia White Stout: 4.1/5
So the bottom line: it may be easy for us to make fun of Cleveland, unless you’re in Detroit, but their beer is most excellent. Thanks Nephilium!
Oh you guys are swapping local brews I thought you were doing home brews. Shoot count me in next time round, I can buy beer even if I’m not quite adept at making it yet.
Nice, Ty. Do you subscribe to a beer service?
We had a “beer it forward” event. I think there were 6 of us? Maybe it was 8? Anyway, Nephilium organized the whole thing. He drew names and let everyone know who they were sending to. It was fun.
There were nine participants. It was done shotgun style, where everyone was assigned a random person to ship to. Once names were drawn, it was just a matter of passing along who each person needed to ship to, sitting back, and making sure everything went smoothly. As it appears to have been well received, I am planning on doing one again in Spring (when shipping beer to those of us in the north doesn’t involve a risk of exploding frozen bottles).
Pro tip: If you put a bag over your head and huff the can of compressed air, it’ll get you a lot drunker than the cold beer.
Are those the Beer Advocate scores, or do you have your own method?
The scores are just, like, my opinion man. I score based onthe category, so I am not saying that porter is better than the IPA, rather that porter is really good, when compared to other porters.
…and provided a limitless amount of *compressed nitrogen*…
i find “fill container 1/3 full w/ice, add water until ice is floating (leave 1/3 room in container), throw handful of salt in, add beer” to be the fastest beer-cooling m.o.. Too much ice without water stinks; too much water also ineffective. i did not learn this from mythbusters, but rather bar-backing in college. If the apocalypse comes, i’m drinking whiskey.
It helps if you circulate the ice water too.
The “instant chillers” in the grocery store rotate the chilling liquid in one direction, and the bottle of wine in the other. Takes about 2 minutes.
You can’t spin the beer like that, obviously. (prove me wrong!)
(stares uncomprehendingly)
my last local supermarket in NY was in a former meat-packing facility. it had those clear plastic slats over the doors, and was basically a building-sized refrigerator. they had one ‘not as cold’ room for bread and stuff. but you could see your breath in the meat/dairy/produce/beer section. You had to dress appropriately if you planned to shop leisurely.
At my local Ralph’s (Kroger), they only have about 20 white wines and champagnes in the refrigerated section, and the other thousands upon thousands of bottles are just on the shelf.
They figured out that a lot of people were buying wine as a gift on the way to parties, so they put in an instant chiller. Put it in, push a button, and 2 minutes later, it’s cold and ready to go. They even had a pile of free gift wrapping next to the chiller at one point, but they got rid of it for exactly the reasons you might think.
exactly the reasons you might think.
People were leaving dick pics mixed in every few sheets?
I read this in Thurston Howell’s voice
I wish NY would allow the sale of wine in grocery stores.
But if they did, you wouldn’t be getting the “Full Canadian”! 😉
I didn’t really know what a “liquor store” was until I went to the East Coast.
My whiskey comes from Costco.
…and provided a limitless amount of *compressed nitrogen
There will be plenty at Office Max. I met a guy in Iraq that was putting ammonia floor cleaner in the cooler with a bunch of tshirts. I asked him why:
Him: The ammonia keeps the ice colder, longer. Wrap the shirts around your neck to keep you cool today. (It was 110+ that day).
Me: You get the same efect from salt…
Him: Why would I want to wrap my neck in saltwater?
Me: …..
For the record he was from South Carolina.
I’d send you some Miner’s Daughter Stout if I could. I think you’d like it.
http://mountainstatebrewing.com/beer-type/apple-ale/
Are you referring to me? I probably would like it.
Darn, I wish I could get involved, but transpondian shipping charges likely prohibit.
Do post more about beer. Mmm… beer…
It only cost me $15 bucks to send 6 beers to Minneapolis from Ithaca at FedEx.
Yep. I was about the same from North Dakota to Texas.
That was about what I paid to ship to you from Phoenix. Definetely under $20.
Well, gentlemen (BTANLW), that’s nice and all, but I’m across the Atlantic. In the UK. I’m not sure what the law says about shipping beer between those Untied States, or any of them, and dear old Blighty?
If it’s not too bad, I certainly have some decent breweries near me whose products you chaps would enjoy…
Matt Lauer’s wife reportedly leaves New York home following sexual misconduct allegations
http://www.foxnews.com/entertainment/2017/12/02/matt-lauers-wife-reportedly-leaves-new-york-home-following-sexual-misconduct-allegations.html
***
Matt Lauer’s wife has reportedly left their New York home and jetted to her native country the Netherlands amid the bombshell sexual misconduct allegations against the former “Today” show co-host.
Annette Roque, a former model, was last spotted at their home in the Hamptons, Long Island, Wednesday, the same day NBC News announced they were terminating the “Today” show co-host for “inappropriate sexual behavior,” Page Six reported.
A source told Page Six Roque has left for her family’s home near Amsterdam. It was not clear if the couple’s three children went with their mother or remained in New York.
Roque, who has been married to Lauer for 20 years, has not released a statement or comment regarding her husband’s termination and alleged sexual misconduct.
Lauer’s representatives have not commented on the state of the former anchor’s marriage.
Lauer and Roque’s marriage has been rocky since 2006. Roque filed for divorce in 2006 but did not follow through, People reported. A source told Page Six the TV host offered Roque a post-nuptial agreement as she filed for divorce. He reportedly offered the former model $5 million to stay in the marriage.
“Matt needed to stay in the marriage to keep his reputation as America’s nicest dad. He is in fact a great, and very doting dad to his kids, but he is also a terrible husband,” a source told Page Six.
Earlier this week, People released a report stating it was no secret that Lauer cheated on his wife.
***
Well, it’s, like, just my opinion, man, but Annette Roque appears to be a minor goddess. Some guys just don’t know when they’ve got it good.
(PSA: the preceding opinion assumes that Ms. Roque is, in fact, an otherwise normal human being; all bets are off if she’s some kinda weirdo or harridan. “Beauty is skin deep but ugly goes all the way to the bone,” and all that.)
I received a fine collection of Arizona ales and stouts from Mr Sharpshooter, in a box decorated with our very own Top Hat wearing Glib insignia.
My in-laws drank two of them, I took two more to a party and can’t remember how good they were, but I saved 4 of the cans as decoration.
The Scottish Ale (I think it was from a joint in Flagstaff?) was excellent, and the Borderlands Brewing Moonlight Vanilla Porter was fucking excellent. I would pay for a case of them to be shipped all the way here, it was that good.
Thanks again!
Tundra sent me an email with a killer review of the beers I sent him; hopefully he reposts it here. His reviews were as thick and tasty as the beers themselves.
Kiltlifter is brewed in Tempe near Arizona State, I think the Hefe was from Flag, but the Borderlands one is awesome. Apparently the get the vanilla from Mexico.
Yeah man, the balance of sweet, vanilla, and porter Style was perfect. Best of the bunch by far.
Keep talking like that, Riven is going to make ship some to her.
The most accurate historical reenactment ever.
The cast from “The Secret of Nimh” had to find another show eventually, right?
Next Crusader Kings expansion confirmed, day one purchase!
Anyone know if you
canshouldare allowed to ship glass bottles?the folks got me a beer of the month thing a few years back and they were always bottles.
I wondered mostly because I’d be happy to ship my beer of choice to people. Switchback finally started bottling small bottles a few years ago, but no cans. I can ship cans of heady topper out though.
You’re in Heady Topper country now, right?
you want some?
You want some of this, bitch?
Steve is the best
“no, you don’t give a fuck.”
“you want some of this, bitch?”
Fuck yeah!
My friend is at his inlaws in VT right now. He’s flying back with a whole suitcase full.
I’d do the same thing. When we moved to Colorado I spent the week or so before gathering as many as I could.
You can ship glass bottles, it just requires more packing, more ziplock bags, and more expense (glass bottles are heavier then aluminum cans.
would ship beers out to fellow drunks.
A player is a player from the cradle to the grave.
Roque, who has been married to Lauer for 20 years, has not released a statement or comment regarding her husband’s termination and alleged sexual misconduct.
“Oh, great, now he’s gonna be waving that thing in *my* face, again.”
Heh.
A tribute to the topic at hand.
Similar theme different style
Beer 30
Beer!
I too got some great beers (and swag) from Nephilium. They were all great. I actually want to go to Cleveland now!
The only beer MS and I got that was the same was the white stout. I can concur that it was an excellent beer. He also sent me a “Peanut Butter Cup Porter” from Willoughby Brewing. That was amazing. Absolutely delicious.
Another great review MS. Keep ’em comin’!
And hopefully we can do another beer swap in the spring. It would be fun to make it a bi-annual tradition.
One more thing; thanks for the alt-text. I always love the alt-text.
Ummm….. no. Just no.
I can’t even…
Yeah…no.
If i were any good at photoshop i would quickly mock up Colin Kaepernick nailed to the cross
here we go
That really needs to be in the swag section.
Ass hat
How many interceptions did Rosa Parks throw?
/walks away triumphantly
I received a shipment of Smog City beer along with jerky and this book from egould310. The book is in my to-read queue. The jerky was delicious. I liked the beers he sent.
That coffee porter looks good.
today I learned
***
Vote Recorder
Photo: Vote Recorder. Edison’s first patented invention was a vote recorder for use by legislative bodies such as Congress. He may have been spurred by reports in the Telegrapher that the Washington, D.C., City Council planned to install an electric vote recorder and that the New York State legislature was considering one as well. In Edison’s system, each legislator moved a switch to either a yes or a no position, thus transmitting a signal to a central recorder that listed the names of the members in two columns of metal type headed “Yes” and “No.” The recording clerk then placed a sheet of chemically prepared paper over the columns of type and moved a metallic roller over the paper and type.
As the current passed through the paper, the chemicals decomposed, leaving the imprint of the name in a manner similar to that of chemical recording automatic telegraphs. Dials on either side of the machine recorded the total number of yeas and nays. Edison was issued U. S. Patent 90,646 on 1 June 1869. A fellow telegrapher named Dewitt Roberts bought an interest in the invention for $100 and took it to Washington, D.C. to exhibit to a committee of Congress. The chairman of the committee, unimpressed with the speed with which the instrument could record votes, told him that “if there is any invention on earth that we don’t want down here, that is it.” The slow pace of roll call voting in Congress and other legislatures enabled members to filibuster legislation or convince others to change their votes. Edison’s vote recorder was never used.
***
http://edison.rutgers.edu/vote.htm
Thank you. That was interesting!
All the Christmas stuff hauled up from basement, tree up, lights on. Women currently decorating and getting drunk on wine. Time to take a shower and head out to the bar for massive quantities of Miller Lite and some football. Go Bucks!
I hope it’s good wine and not moscato or white zin or shit like that.
Yeah, it’s real wine.
I received some excellent IPAs from Tundra.
Na zdravie
What did he send? I need an anniversary gift (the spouse loves IPA’s), and I’m close to MN.
Steel Toe Size 7 and Castle Danger Ode. Of the two my preference (and I think his) is Ode.
Thanks!
The IPA’s from Surly Brewing are very popular as well. Todd the Axeman and Furious
Goddamit, I’m really late!
I’m glad you liked them, T&T! Did your wife try them?
RA: Castle Danger Ode is a great example of what I call the “refreshing” IPAs. It just really tastes great. Steel Toe is more of the bitter but traditional taste. I really like it as well. Mike mentioned Todd the Axe Man and it’s excellent. Abrasive is another to consider if you can get it. I’m bored with Furious. It’s good but I’ve moved on.
My wife might have had a sip of the beers, but she can’t have a whole beer as she’s pregnant.
Kid #2 is due in June
Lol. Congrats, man. Let me know what you want to try and I’ll ship it!
Cool, thanks.
I’m doing the lights with the usual torpedos but I have a Lagunitas Imperial Stout ready for BBQ later,
Great Review again, MS!
Fuck, I slept in too much to make it to the Crossroads of the West/Small Arms Review show in reasonable time. Might go tomorrow but wasn’t initially planning on it, so bleh.
http://insider.foxnews.com/2017/12/02/school-lunch-rules-eased-trump-agriculture-department
***
The Trump administration announced it will ease Obama-era school lunch rules.
Under a program championed by Michelle Obama, public schools instituted strict nutritional standards.
Trump’s Department of Agriculture said that, effective next summer, kid-favorite chocolate milk will return to the cafeteria.
Additionally, whole grain requirements and sodium limits will be relaxed.
“Fox & Friends” reported that, under the now-sunsetting Obama plan, many students have elected to toss their less-appetizing meals.
The eased rules take effect July 2018.
***
I’m trying Coronado’s Tropical IPA in a few minutes. If you don’t hear from me, that means it was good.
lemme know about that one Playa
It was either really good or made of poison.
And to give credit, I received a fine collection of beers from DEG. Of which, only one was from a brewery I had heard of before. My ratings of the beers averaged a 3.73 out of 5.
Excellent.
Had the bourbon barrel gingerbread stout from Hardywood at lunch today – apparently got a 100 from someone a couple years back, won a few awards. Overall – highly recommended (10.6%). Also got a free glass even though “steal the glass” was last night – I’m happy.
/takes notes
They have a “gingerbread stout” – about 9%, and a “Bourbon Barrel Gingerbread stout” – 10.6%. All their bottles look pretty similar too so you have to be careful. In general, most of their stuff is pretty good (including pumpkin) – I think I was less enthused with some of their fruit offerings but almost nothing is as good as Samuel Smith on that end.
Another great review MS. After the new year I should be able to get in on the beer it forward. How are you guys determining if a brew is not available in the recipients area?
It shouldn’t be a big issue, if you stick with local breweries and you’re shipping out of your region, you’re generally good. Or you can use a tool like this, but there’s no guarantee that it’s up to date (as an example, I searched for 3 Ohio breweries that opened this year and started canning, and none of them were listed).
I’d like to point out that based on the spreadsheet they use for that tool, Ohio is second in the nation with brewery options at 413, falling behind only Illinois with 422.
I’m in for the spring one.
#metoo. Assuming that the founders don’t figure out that I’m Tulpa and ban hammer me by then.
Me three.