A discussion in the Comments this week gave me a flashback to my elementary school days. My parents had moved me from an Orthodox Jewish private school to the local public school in our working-class suburb of Baltimore. The student population was probably 2/3 Jewish, the teaching staff was about zero Jewish; this was contingent, since the suburb had long been a white Christian semi-rural town, as was most of the county, and the housing developments that had recently sprung up were at the vanguard of flight from an increasingly dangerous city, with the Jews being the pioneers of the northwest direction. The old timers were, um, grudging in their acceptance of change. But the reality was, the Jewish kids, almost all 2nd and 3rd generation Americans, were pretty much indistinguishable from the other kids- we watched the same TV shows, played Little League, joined the Boy Scouts, played War, went to the chop suey restaurant once a month…

Nonetheless, the teachers (as proto-progressives) thought that it was important that when we studied American history, some contribution from Jews had to be worked in to make it somehow “relevant” to the kids. The reality was, there weren’t many of (((us))) around during the Founding, and for that matter, before the 20th century. So it was a reach- and every year, when we’d talk about the revolution, there would be a day or two dedicated to… Haym Salomon, who creatively sold financial instruments to raise money for George Washington.

This dive into “relevance” no doubt made our teachers feel better, but I think most of the students were a bit uncomfortable. Way to hit a stereotype, and sound a bit desperate. For the black kids, I’m sure that the teachers trotted out Crispus Attucks, who basically distinguished himself by getting killed as a bystander. At least, unlike the Jew stereotype, they didn’t praise Attucks for being a great dancer.

But “relevance”? Really? What’s relevant wasn’t the ethnicity or gender of the Founders, it was the power of their ideas. The fact that they were Christians and of Western European descent was irrelevant to us- we all knew people with numbers tattooed on their arms, heard stories of family slaughtered, and yet, there we were, in a working-class suburb, seeing our families and friends going about their lives. Sure, there was prejudice, neighborhoods Jews couldn’t live in, clubs we couldn’t join, beaches we couldn’t go to, but we were living in a culture that Jews had shaped. That their influence didn’t start rising until the great immigration waves of 1900-1927 was irrelevant to us.

So seriously, fuck Salomon. And whatever Jewish cowboy token someone could dig up (the case of Wyatt Earp is interesting, though). What we had was a country into which we had all assimilated, while contributing our unique flavors, a country based on universal ideals. Thomas Paine was important, a banker, much less so. We thought ourselves as one with Jefferson, Washington, Madison, Lincoln, and didn’t think of ourselves as somehow being outsiders or “different.”

And here we are today, July 4, 2017, where the biggest problem facing American Jewry is not threats from people on the Right or people on the Left. Those people are marginal at best, a tiny minority of losers who need to invoke bigotry to assure themselves of their own relevance. We have no fear or them or worry that they might actually influence people. Most people, the vast majority, don’t really give a shit whether you’re a (fill in the ethnic blank). This is our home, America, the best and safest place for Jews on the planet. Our actual biggest threat? Being married out of existence.

That kind of problem we can live with.

Thank you, Founding Fathers, and thank you America- the country, not the government- for making us part of you.