Sunday Morning Links O’ Laughter

I’ll try to keep it more or less light, since as predicted, Texas was utterly destroyed and we should have respect for the millions of people killed because of our withdrawal from the Paris Climate Accords.

Brown Chicken, Brown Cow!

Conor McGregor blames his loss on all the blood flowing out of his head to… well, see for yourself.

When a catfight happens, the preggo usually loses.

If they did this in Chicago, it would keep the cops too busy to be shooting people at random. (h/t np)

When the Left eats their own, Baby Jesus stops crying for a minute or two.

And finally, music. There may be a better female vocalist walking this planet than Kris Delmhorst, but I can’t imagine who’d that be.

Comments

379 responses to “Sunday Morning Links O’ Laughter”

  1. Rick C-137

    A white kid. With a flag. Is White Supremacy.

    Well, we keep digging for peak derp, too bad we can’t harness it for energy.

    1. Heroic Mulatto

      I hate every single person who commented on that Twitter post.

      1. Rick C-137

        Same, tbh.

  2. xenophon

    Jesus. Hammering on the back of a head of a pregnant woman is the new punching Nazis, huh? What the fuck.

    1. 22k instagram followers on a 1 day old account. O fortuna!

      1. A woman from Florida is being labelled a ‘hero’ online after taking on another white woman who was allegedly being racist in the lobby of a Florida hotel.

        Oooooooohhh…………

      2. Count Potato

        Staged event by a wannabe Instragram model?

        Anyway, what kind of security guard just stands there and does nothing?

        1. Q Continuum

          I agree, sounds staged. Funny how the “hero” just happens to have this enormous social media presence, and her statement following the altercation hits all the right lefty talking points. She’s not bad looking, but certainly not good looking enough to get her 15-minutes on that alone. If it was staged, it’s actually pretty brilliant.

    2. Not an Economist

      And the “hero” is basking in her new found fame.

    3. Heroic Mulatto

      If pregnant women don’t want to be donkey punched, then they shouldn’t threaten to shoot people before manhandling them.

      1. Count Potato

        Do we know that’s what happened?

        1. westernsloper

          That is what the article says happened. Convenient her friends recorded it all though. At least I assume they are her friends since she asks them if they got it all on video.

    4. J. Frank Parnell

      Yeah, this is terrible. Next time I hope she attacks a woman who isn’t pregnant. Also I’d like to see less punching and more wrestling with accompanying hair-pulling and clothes-tearing until one of them is pinned to the ground.

  3. WBUR On Point host Tom Ashbrook interview with an author, discussing his book on intercommunication between trees. Original air date September 14, 2016. Or: Why injecting politics into completely innocent and unrelated topics always deserves an eye roll and ridicule.

    (23:39 in)

    Caller Chris from Wallingford Connecticut: “I’m curious, we live in an age of so many negative tendencies such as racism and, um, negative attributes like that. I’m curious if we can see or learn from something like that in trees. Do they decide what information they relay to other trees when they communicate with other species or other trees within their same species are they selective with what they’ll communicate?”

    Host Tom Ashbrook: “Peter what about it, bias, or prejudice or selective assistance between trees of different stripes?”

    Guest Peter Wohlleben: “I think trees differ between friends and not friends and family members and non family members, but in general they are all working together and they are very social without thinking to themselves by supporting other trees. Uhm, they are no…uhm…racist or racism under trees..uhm. What we sometimes think for example, beech harass oak trees, but oak trees are as far away from beech trees like humans and goldfish for example. But, uhm, a different races of beech trees for example, I think they will cooperate….”

    […]

    (38:16 in)

    Host Tom Ashbrook: “But I’ve seen whole, for example apple orchards in Germany which were unbelievably manicured and looked like lines of soldiers standing perfectly so the branches sort of ‘Hands up, don’t shoot!’ that kind of…uhh…uh…I’ve never seen anyting like it in North America …that that…deep manicuring lots of trees there! But deeply deeply disciplined into a certain productive…order.”

    1. xenophon

      Our society is entirely too wealthy and safe.

      1. Then brother do I have a dialectic to sell you. You in the market for a new one?

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder

          Hegelian or one of the new fancier models?

          1. Wait, there are other non-Hegelian dialectics?

      2. Rick C-137

        Yeah, I’m starting to think that.

      3. wdalasio

        Unfortunately, this sort of nonsense seems to provide all to plausible a corrective for that.

    2. Pat

      People who hear voices are mentally ill. People who hear the voice of god are superstitious relics of a past era. People who talk to trees are woke af.

    3. Heroic Mulatto

      Wait, what?

      1. Rick C-137

        Uh, it’s pretty obvious, tree, like don’t have racism and like can, uh, um, learn from them and shit.

        1. M. Night Shamalamamamamaman FTW!

        2. Count Potato

          I thought Christmas trees were racist against Muslims.

      2. Here, it’s this.

      3. Gustave Lytton

        Poor HM, the bleeding edge of linguistics is going into flora without him.

    4. Suthenboy

      I remember this horseshit from back in the 70’s. There is an awful lot of magical thinking in the feelz crowd.

      Trees are engaged in mortal combat with each other it just happens so slow we cant see it. They are in a constant struggle to crowd each other out, strangle each others roots etc. Peaceful forest, my ass. I have been tending trees for 45 years and I can tell you that the life of a tree is brutal. Still, a tree has no sentience.

      1. Fatty Bolger

        It’s a mercy we can’t hear the screaming.

        1. straffinrun

          I nearly lost you there.

    5. Slammer

      The maples want more sunlight, and the oaks ignore their pleas

      1. Yusef drives a Kia

        hatchet, axe and saw

      2. Count Potato

        Let’s not rush to conclusions.

        1. However, let us *narrows gaze*

          1. Count Potato

            My first narrowed gaze!

            Here, have some narrow gays:

            http://www.tmz.com/2017/04/10/kristen-stewart-braless-birthday/

        2. J. Frank Parnell

          Yeah, we don’t want to be geddying ahead of ourselves.

  4. The Late P Brooks

    Except that it’s really happening in Colorado.

    Imagine my surprise. Fucking Colorado hipsters.

    1. Mr Lizard

      I recall this being tried in VA about 10 years ago, and pretty much nothing came of it. The did however attempt to institute a wonderfully harsh post-citation speeding deal. Where you pay the ticket then pay a tax on the ticket for 4 more years.

      1. King George couldn’t think up shit like this even if automobiles were around back in the day.

    2. DOOMco

      I didn’t do it!

  5. The Late P Brooks

    imagine a million CR-Vs and Priuses and whatnot out there driven by the Whole Foods crowd

    Don’t kid yourself, Pal. There are plenty of busybody assholes out there in 3/4 ton pickup trucks who’d be only too happy to chastise the wicked.

  6. Domino – Sweet Potato Pie. 1990s tunes to pair with your morning coffee.

      1. Nice! Tough for me to decide the best musical act of the early 1990s: Roxette or Tevin Campbell.

    1. Brasidas

      Saw the title and thought you were talking about a pizza.

  7. Pat

    ‘This is a young country, built on racism. Black people have been disenfranchised for over 250 years. The faster white people accept and validate the truth, the closer we’ll come to a place of peace and understanding. Fighting racism is dependent upon using my white privilege for the right reasons,’ she wrote on Twitter.

    Drunk white trash bitch loses temper on other drunk white trash bitch and plays the race card for 5 minutes in the spotlight.

    Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuck Youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

    1. Stinky Wizzleteats

      Hey, check yourself. The woman’s a moral giant, a violent Gandhi!

      1. Rick C-137

        Violent Ghandi.

        Band Name or Album Name?

        1. Band….definitely a band name.

      2. Not an Economist

        You mean the racist, Nazi supporting (he refused to fight against Nazi’s) Gandhi?

        1. Rick C-137

          Yeah, that’s the one.

    2. wdalasio

      You know what, send the bitch to a prison with a large Aryan Nation population. I don’t give a damn if it is a men’s prison.

      People need to learn that you’re not allowed to beat people up for having the wrong opinions.

      1. Not an Economist

        The pregnant lady was arrested, not the lady basking in the adulation of her supporters.

        1. wdalasio

          So, let me see if I got this right. Someone assaults a pregnant woman for saying the wrong thing and the victim of the assault gets arrested?

          1. Pat

            Drunk white trash bitch A was allegedly making racist remarks about Haitians off camera. When the video picks up she confronts and shoves drunk white trash bitch B. Drunk white trash bitch B responds by knocking drunk white trash bitch A to the ground and delivering some haymakers about her head until hotel security pulls them apart. Drunk white trash bitch B is then declared a racial justice hero and promptly takes to social media to cash in.

          2. Pat

            (and drunk white trash bitch A is arrested for instigating a fight)

          3. wdalasio

            Ah, well, my guess is it’s only a matter of time until drunk white trash bitch B finds her way to joining her in jail.

          4. It is kind of hard to tell from the article, but I got the impression that the pregnant lady threw the first punch.

          5. wdalasio

            Ah. That does change the nature of the story a bit.

  8. Rick C-137
    1. Pat

      The UK is transitioning.

      1. straffinrun

        To what? KUK?

        1. Rick C-137

          Maximum kek

  9. The Late P Brooks

    Land of fruits and nuts

    Over seven years, the state of California has spent $449 million on consumer rebates to boost sales of zero-emission vehicles.

    So far, the subsidies haven’t moved the needle much. In 2016, of the just over 2 million cars sold in the state, only 75,000 were pure-electric and plug-in hybrid cars. To date, out of 26 million cars and light trucks registered in California, just 315,000 are electric or plug-in hybrids.

    The California Legislature is pushing forward a bill that would double down on the rebate program. Sextuple down, in fact.

    If $449 million can’t do it, the thinking goes, maybe $3 billion will.

    That’s the essence of the plan that could lift state rebates from $2,500 to $10,000 or more for a compact electric car, making, for example, a Chevrolet Bolt EV electric car cost the same as a gasoline-driven Honda Civic.

    Of course it will work. All it takes is money. Lots and lots of money.

    1. Rick C-137
      1. Q Continuum

        Shaka, when the walls fell?

    2. Pat

      So far, the subsidies haven’t moved the needle much.

      They’ve done wonders for Elon Musk’s net worth though.

      1. Rick C-137

        Gross. How did he get a rep as a libertarian at all?

      2. Rufus the Monocled

        Musk’s worth is ‘fuelled’ by subsidies.

        Yeah but he’s trying to get it ‘electrified’!

        1. Boooooooooo!

          1. Rufus the Monocled

            I’ll be here ALL WEEK!

          2. Roger Wilco

            Don’t let the boos throw you for a hyperloop, your jokes are killing on mars

    3. Suthenboy

      There is no such thing as a zero emission vehicle. Electric cars are wildly inefficient consumers of energy. They are environmental disasters. Dumbest fucking idea ever.

      1. Rufus the Monocled

        But if you take away all the virtue signalling the world will die!

        1. Rhywun

          Upper middle class white people hardest hit.

          1. Tundra

            They’re already reeling from the Amazon/Whole Foods unholy union.

    4. american socialist

      Cost the same as? Lol

    5. Scruffy Nerfherder

      How dare they give tax breaks to the 1 percent!

  10. Rick C-137
    1. Rick C-137

      Alternate take:

      Somalia before those nasty libertarians got em.

    2. Pat

      P4K: 10/10 BNM

    3. BakedPenguin

      Mogadishu, when the walls fell.

      1. ::beatnik finger-snapping applause::

      2. Rick C-137

        That’s why I was going for! Thanks BP.

    1. Pass. I know some people up at the University that might be interested. *forwards*

    2. straffinrun

      With our unique Compassionate Activism approach, you can learn how to hold that pain of racism in a way that’s healing and comes from a place of love and justice.

      With my Cuminyourassntits Packjism approach, you can learn how hold to walk bull legged.

      1. straffinrun

        Whoops. Meant to delete that.

        1. Rick C-137

          No, no. Leave it.

      2. Whatever, packitinforfun

    3. Suthenboy

      What the hell are we going to do with all of these useful idiots? Imagine the food wasted on them. They are a fucking waste of meat.

      1. dbleagle

        More accurately a waste of free range, non-gmo, gluten free, organic tofu “burgers” on a bed of single batch, locally sourced and fare trade kale. Washed down with cruelty free water from a hydro-flask with Jello Biafra stickers.

  11. Rick C-137

    Sometimes its a good day, other times I think this world can only be cleansed with fire.

    http://everydayfeminism.com/2017/08/consent-doesnt-exist-disabled/

    1. Pat

      This often takes the form of being expected to share (very) personal information with able bodied people to get basic access, but it also includes forced physical intimacy, especially for those of us who need physical help that often requires touching of our bodies.

      How about a compromise: you can fuck off and die rather than be touched by an able bodied person, and normal human beings can continue helping each other as they have for 50,000 years.

      1. Scruffy Nerfherder

        That was my first thought.

    2. Heroic Mulatto

      Forced intimacy was one of the many ways I learned that consent does not exist for my disabled Asian girl body-mind.

      I learned that from watching Neon Genesis Evangelion.

      1. Rick C-137

        Hawt

      2. Count Potato

        “disabled Asian girl body-mind”

        What does that even mean?

        1. Rhywun

          Brain damage?

    3. Rhywun

      The sidebar doesn’t disappoint, as usual: “How White Americans’ Hatred of Racism Actually Supports Racism Instead of Solves It”

      LOL

    4. Chipwooder

      Mama must have cooked the breakfast with hog today.

      1. Pi Guy

        +1 Good Day

    5. Chipwooder

      And now that I actually read the ridiculous thing, I see this person is truly striving for legendary status in the Grievance Olympics:

      It has been a constant part of my life and my experience as a queer disabled Korean transracial and transnational adoptee woman survivor

      1. Rhywun

        I am still not sure if that site isn’t one huge prank.

        1. Mythical Libertarian Woman

          Their biggest prank is the “Going out of business” sign that they’ve been hanging in the window for months. IF YOU’RE GOING OUT OF BUSINESS, JUST GO ALREADY

      2. J. Frank Parnell

        Privileged bitch.

        /queer disabled Korean transracial transnational adoptee woman survivor otherkin

    6. J. Frank Parnell

      Tip: if you don’t provide any accessibility information about your event, then I cannot assess what my access needs will be.

      Am I supposed to list out every single access need I might ever possibly have, simply because of your ignorance?

      No, obviously they’re supposed to list out “accessibility information” for every “access need” that could possibly affect anyone with any sort of disability, and then you can write an article complaining that they missed some weirdly-specific combination of “access needs” that apparently affects you and you alone.

      Or, you know, you could say “I’m in a wheelchair” and they can confirm that yes, they have ramps and special seating and a large bathroom stall with handles on the wall and everything else on the standard list of stuff that makes a place “wheelchair accessible.”

  12. Pat

    Texas homeowner shoots intruder as Harvey makes landfall

    A man broke into a Corpus Christi, Texas, home just as Category 4 Hurricane Harvey barreled into the Texas Gulf Coast on Friday evening, causing the homeowner to shoot him.

    Climate change and no gun control. Welcome to Trump’s America!

  13. Pat

    What White Supremacists and Racists Get Wrong About the Confederacy

    One morning, after visiting the breakfast bar at my hotel, I sat alone and had my bagel with cream cheese. Overhearing the conversation at the next table, I realized that I had stumbled into a convention of the Sons of Confederate Veterans (SCV). I suddenly felt that I was trapped behind enemy lines.[…]

    Eventually, I sat down next to the Ohio native, and we had a short chat. He told me that he was not just proud of his Southern heritage, but was also a libertarian in his political views.

    This got my attention. How could someone devoted to “liberty” be so proud of his affiliation with a war to maintain slavery?

    1. Rick C-137

      Inb4 libertarians are secret confederates

    2. wdalasio

      You know, it really is a shame that they don’t actually teach much history, anymore. Lincoln, himself, the guy who actually led the Union effort against the Confederacy didn’t consider the Civil War just a matter of suppressing those evil Southern racists and their evil Southern racists. When he spoke of the war, he regularly referred to it in terms of divine retribution for America’s (not just the South’s) sin of slavery. The last Northern slave had been “freed” by dying (the abolition of slavery in the North usually took the form of saying that the children of slaves were free, but not the slaves themselves.) some 13 years prior to the start of the war. The major market for Southern cotton was Northern textile mills. And, of course, the people who actually sold the slaves to the Southern plantations in the first place were Northerners.

      1. Viking1865

        The last Northern slave had been “freed” by dying (the abolition of slavery in the North usually took the form of saying that the children of slaves were free, but not the slaves themselves.) some 13 years prior to the start of the war.

        Uh citation needed on that. The Union invaded the Confederacy with both sides holding slaves. The Union fought most of the war with legal slavery. The Emancipation Proclamation “freed” slaves in the Confederacy, but not the Union. Maryland, for example, only outlawed slavery through a thoroughly rigged constitutional convention in 1864.

        1. This is that whole question of whether the war was about slavery. Yes, it was, but not in the way that people who say that typically mean.

          The effect of the 3/5 Compromise was that slave states had disproportionate voting power per free citizen. Besides slavery itself, most slave states were heavily dependent on agricultural exports and the importation of finished goods, while the Northern states had more diverse economies headlined by manufacturing. Southern congresscritters were typically at loggerheads with Northern congresscritters over issues like tariffs and foreign trade policy, because the North wanted cheap access to Southern cotton and Southern markets, while the South wanted the better money they could get exporting cotton to Europe.

          When the Kansas-Nebraska Act passed, it broke the ceasefire between pro- and anti-slavery forces established by the Missouri Compromise, allowing newly-formed states to decide whether they’d be free or not. This alarmed abolitionists, but particularly Northern politicians who worried that the South would develop an unassailable Congressional majority, leading to “Bleeding Kansas”, bloodshed, and ultimately Kansas’ admittance as a free state. The country was already primed for a civil war, and that pretty much set it off.

          So, the civil war was about slavery, yeah, but it was also about economics and political representation, and not as three separate issues. All three were wrapped up in each other.

          1. Custrel

            “So, the civil war was about slavery, yeah, but it was also about economics and political representation, and not as three separate issues. All three were wrapped up in each other.”

            Certainly an honest argument to be made there, and it addresses there are more nuances to the civil war than just “slavery is immoral,” but I’d also argue both the political and economic issues because of the South’s desire to keep slavery legal. If there is no slavery in the South, then the economic and political issues never get to the point of secession.

        2. wdalasio

          Admittedly, I was going off of Wikipedia. And I specifically used “Northern” rather than “Union” in recognition of that. Maryland was a special case that I don’t think serves either argument. It only remained in the union due to occupation.

          1. wdalasio

            In particular, I’m going off of state laws.

    3. leonadasiv

      This is what bothers me. My family was very much from the south, and I can assure you, they owned slaves. The practice was morally reprehensible. To say that I’m not allowed to still be proud of my heritage and to try to understand the nuances of the post is irritating. We all have rapists, murders and slave owners in our past.

      1. Lincoln’s pursuit of war was more immoral than slavery, just like murder is more immoral than kidnapping and theft.

        1. Custrel

          That’s an interesting thought. Does NAP allow for deadly force to extricate your neighbor/brother from aggression by a third Party?

          If your neighbor A has enslaved your neighbor B and literally has him chained in his front yard is it moral for you to use force against neighbor A to free neighbor Brian? Or does NAP require you to let neighbor A alone?

          1. Viking1865

            Your analogy is flawed. The question would be more along the lines of “Is it moral for you to assault your neighbor to free the three slaves he has in his yard, when you yourself have one slave in your yard.”

          2. Heroic Mulatto

            More accurately, “Is it moral for you to assault your neighbor to free the three slaves he has in his yard while he’s in the process of moving out of the neighborhood?

          3. Custrel

            I honestly wasn’t trying to make an analogy, the topic just gave me thought.

            At what point do some morals trump NAP if ever? If I reasonably believe that my neighbor is holding someone against her will, would NAP restrict me from intervening with force to free her, does it justify my actions to free Her? Or neither?

          4. Heroic Mulatto

            At what point do some morals trump NAP if ever?

            I’m not sure that question makes sense. At least in my understanding of the NAP, it should the prime axiom from which all moral reasoning originates.

          5. Custrel

            Understood. For me the NAP sometimes conflicts with the Golden Rule and Do the Right Thing, which I clearly acknowledge are a product of my cultural programming, but it is a conflict that arises.

            I think that might be why NAP isn’t enough… there seems to be an inherent need in humans for ‘justice.’

          6. If your stated reason for invading neighbor A’s property is to collect tribute from him and NOT to free neighbor B, then your reason for the invadion is immoral, even if, after the fact, neighbor B is loosed from his chains.

          7. The better option in that scenario is to offer to purchase neighbor B, and then free him yourself.

          8. Or, persuade neighbor A that it is in his interests to release neighbor B.

          9. Heroic Mulatto

            I would argue yes, in that by violating the NAP egregiously, A has in essence, by the common law definition, declared himself to be an outlaw. As such, I would say it is moral and proper for another to raise a hue and cry against A.

            Let’s call it the “Mad Dogs Get Put Down” corollary of the NAP.

          10. Scruffy Nerfherder

            Death Wish Libertarianism

          11. Custrel

            This is where I lean right now. The problem as I see it at what point does aggression against a third party allow or require aggression by me?

            If my neighbor hits me, I can hit him back to make him stop. If he hits his wife, do I hit him back to make him stop? Is it my responsibility to help the wife? Or is it optional? Or is my aggression against my neighbor for his aggression against his wife untenable and technically against NAP?

          12. Heroic Mulatto

            Again, in this case, I would argue that you are not responsible for helping the wife, but you are also not obligated to respect the right to non-aggression to someone who is currently in the process of violating the right to non-aggression of another.

            The way I see it, taxes aren’t the price you pay for civilization, it’s the NAP. If someone refuses to follow the NAP, then others have no obligation to follow it when dealing with that individual.

          13. Bob

            That justifies all the wars from Korea to Afghanistan.

          14. Custrel

            It seems that way. If it’s valid for me to attack neighbor A to save neighbor B, especially if neighbor be requests my aid, then it follows that holds for countries.

            Unless we are saying countries live by different goals and standards than individuals, and I’m fine making that distinction.

          15. Pat

            Does NAP allow for deadly force to extricate your neighbor/brother from aggression by a third Party?

            I think most formulations allow for defense of another the same as oneself. A sense of proportionality necessitates the question of whether summary execution is a fair price for kidnapping.

          16. Custrel

            So I could free the kidnapped person, but what if doing so requires me to kill the kidnapper? If kidnapping is not as bad as killing, what justifies my escalation in aggression?

          17. Heroic Mulatto


            “Live free or die: Death is not the worst of evils.”

      2. Not an Economist

        We all have rapists, murders and slave owners in our past.

        To me that is what is critical. Nobody’s past is pristine. Everybody has skeletons in the closet. What matters is how you act. Yes some people have it easier in life, because of their recent ancestors. Who care’s, they don’t define me and they aren’t the ones keeping me down — that is the person I see in the mirror. You can change your own life for the better. I see an obstacle, I don’t sit down and cry, I figure a way around it.

      3. My great-great grandfather served in a volunteer Wisconsin infantry regiment. He was in several battles, and died at 46 from complications of wounds suffered in the war.

        Whenever I hear some asshole whinging on about “reparations,” my first thought is “fuck you. My great-great-grandfather already paid ’em.”

        1. Yes, but you’re a white cishet shitlord.

          1. And I’m damned good at it.

        2. Mythical Libertarian Woman

          One of my mom’s great-great-grandfathers as well. He just disappeared, we assume he died in battle and was not identified.

      4. Roger Wilco

        I’m not super proud of my Southern heritage, but the sanctimony of modern virtual signalists making sweeping judgements of the Confederacy and the South and unironically using terms like “traitors” and “losers” is really polarizing.

      5. Custrel

        At least you aren’t Australian.

      6. Lachowsky

        My earliest American Ancestor come over from poland in 1891. He was a dirt poor catholic sustenance farmer and slavery had been dead for 25 years. I have no reason to have any shame about my southern ancestors.

  14. Rufus the Monocled

    Nyasha Junior: “Academic/Writer on #religion & other not-for-dinner-conversation topics”

    She writes about religion and points out (ahem) alleged racism in an ACLU tweet about the future because they used a white baby?

    Who fucken notices this shit?

    Right….racists and white progressives who project.

    Also.

    I wouldn’t like to be around her dinner table conversations.

    Yeesh.

    1. Rufus the Monocled

      I might add. She’s getting pasted in the comments. How long before she blames the ‘alt-right’ and ‘Trump’s America?”

      1. Rick C-137

        It hasn’t happened already ? That’s gotta be a record

    1. Rick C-137

      It’s not loading for me, so I can only assume it’s nazi paraphernalia, you shitlord

        1. KibbledKristen

          Close – it’s a breakfast burrito instead of a banana

    2. wdalasio

      Now that is a beautiful sight.

    3. Tundra

      Jealous.

      1. I wish I had those shoes too, Tundra.

        1. Tundra

          Right?

    4. Old Man With Candy

      You got wrinkled ankles.

  15. Pat

    Discord chats may be crucial to lawsuits over neo-Nazi violence

    Discord was quick to shut down neo-Nazi servers and accounts in the wake of racist violence in Charlottesville, but that doesn’t mean those conversations are gone forever. In fact, they may be instrumental to making criminal cases and lawsuits stick. The media collective Unicorn Riot has obtained leaked Discord chat screenshots (about 1,000 of them) and audio suggesting that many of the white supremacists were gearing up for a fight even as their organizers were supposedly calling for non-violence. In the days after the Charlottesville march, they also made light of the car attack that murdered Heather Heyer and injured many others.

    In a conversation with Wired, far-right extremist and organizer Eli Mosley validated the accuracy of the Discord materials but insisted that he’d taken sincere steps to discourage violence, including banning 80 people from the Charlottesville server. However, that defense might not stand up in court: the American Civil Liberties Union says the chats show that the white supremacists were itching for an excuse to respond with violence. And of course, it’s not clear that the organizers were sincere in their attempts to discourage bloodshed.

    Remember kids, there is no cloud. It’s just somebody else’s computer.

    1. Rick C-137

      Yeah, it’s on the internet it’s forever.

    2. straffinrun

      At the least, the leak could easily drive groups away from Discord, Slack and any other online chat system where it’s easy for a mole to share incriminating evidence.

      It’s not me. Really.

    3. Mr Lizard

      So planning to respond with force when entering a situation where you know others will initiate force is the new rights violation?

    4. Pat

      Note that there is no such concomitant criminal or civil case regarding Antifa websites directly calling for violence and insurrection.

      1. Hush, sweet prince.

      2. whiz

        Has anybody mentioned the similarity between antifa wearing masks and klan hoods? Surely someone here has, because it’s so obvious.

    5. Not an Economist

      Of course you can find similar chat logs from Antifa and their supporters saying the same thing.

      But that is different — because they are fighting fascism or something.

  16. The Late P Brooks

    Science, motherfucker!

    The_Donald and other alt-right spaces are acting as meeting places for disaffected white men from all walks of life to share a communal hatred. They start out in different corners of the internet with different interests and different lexicons. They remain separate when they’re outside of The_Donald, but the more time they spend in there, the more pernicious views of the world they are likely to pick up by osmosis. They are forming a coherent group identity, represented in the language they have begun to speak, which coalesces around their common hatred of liberalism and their love of Donald Trump.

    We’re witnessing the radicalization of young white men through the medium of frog memes. In order to see it, all you need to do is look at the words coming out of their mouths. The alt-right isn’t yet united, but it soon will be.

    The alt-right is taking over the intertubes, or something. Soon, we’ll all be in chains.

    1. Slammer

      REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

    2. Mr Lizard

      “Soon, we’ll all be in chains.”

      Well just long enough to herd you into the pens

    3. Suthenboy

      “We’re witnessing the radicalization of young white men through the medium of frog memes. ”

      I cant tell the difference between their gibberish and the babbling of schizophrenics.

      1. Akira

        4chan fucking loves it when their memes are taken seriously by the normies.

        1. Custrel

          Watching the MSM try to explain 4chan is like watching a color version of Refer Madness.

    4. butt-head

      Outgroup / Journalist doesn’t understand subculture. Water is wet.

    5. Roger Wilco

      I swear, MapReduce has made us dumber

  17. The Late P Brooks

    I wouldn’t like to be around her dinner table conversations.

    You could pelt her with dinner rolls. Or stab her in the eye with your salad fork.

    1. Which side of the knife does one place the eyestab fork when setting the table?

  18. So I’ve been thinking about paying for one of those cheek swab genetic sequencing dealios to understand the distribution of the genetic soup of my monkey-fuck origins. My dad did the cheek swab tests and determined that he’s 5% Ashkenazi Joo. Does anyone have any opinion about what the best bang for the buck is? 23andMe? Anscestry?

    1. Mr Lizard

      STEVE SMITH ALWAYS BEST BUCK FOR BANG

      1. Rhywun

        BEST B*CK EVAH!

    2. Tundra

      I’m not sure it matters. My wife and I used ancestry. My brother did both Ancestry and 23&me. The results were very similar, but the ancestry report seemed more detailed.

    3. Suthenboy

      Being a paranoid old grouch I wont be giving anyone my DNA. It will probably end up in a government database which no doubt a single payer system would have access to.

      No thanks.

      1. mexican sharpshooter
      2. Tangentially related: I went to the eye doctor, and they took my blood pressure, first thing. It creeped me out. (It was high as a hippie, of course).

        1. Homple

          High blood pressure is bad for the eyes. Its important for eye specialists to check it.

          http://www.webmd.com/hypertension-high-blood-pressure/guide/eye-disease-high-blood-pressure

    4. mexican sharpshooter

      Pretend you’re a white supremacist and have some SJW outfit pick up the tab.

      1. You’re on to something. I bet I could get that test paid for by others.

    5. grrizzly

      With 23andMe, you have to spit into a tube.

      1. Old Man With Candy

        Are there any of them which require a semen sample? Asking for a friend.

        1. Pope Jimbo

          Why wait to be invited? Grab the initiative and send them a tube. If they are as good as they say they are, they’ll be able to figure out who sent it.

          1. Custrel

            He who hesitates
            Never masturbates

    6. westernsloper

      Don’t you have any Mormons in the family? They have that genealogy thing down pat. It requires no DNA and then some company can’t sell your DNA to some crime lab needing a a drop sample and a match.

    7. I’m Here To Help

      My wife and I did the 23andMe one. I think she’s also done Ancestry as well. We only did the ancestry test and not the medical, and it didn’t reveal any surprises for me – 99.8% European, and nearly all of that was from Northwestern Europe. Only surprise was that my ancestors were as in-bred as they are – we can trace our family back to Jamestown, but have no Native American genes. Makes me think that they were marrying cousins back when there weren’t that many Europeans over here…

      Was it worth the cost? Eh. I generally knew my family background as we’ve been able to trace the genealogy back a thousand years in some cases, and back to the 1500s or so in all of them. So the test didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know. My wife had a few more interesting results though.

      1. You mean she found out she’s not just your wife but your sister too?

        1. I’m Here To Help

          I’m southern, but not that southern.

          Not very much chance of us being closely related – she’s German, and the last of my family came over from there in the 1880s. One of my wife’s aunts is very much into the Schadenfreude sort of genealogy – looking for cousins who married, the notorious black sheep in the family, etc. She actually uncovered that my great uncle was executed in Texas for murdering his wife, something that my father didn’t even know about until his parent’s death.

      2. Mythical Libertarian Woman

        Are you related to me? My mom’s side has genealogies going back that far. I think they also came over to Jamestown, I’d have to double check though. My dad’s side is a joke—my great-grandparents came over from Italy and we know nothing about that side beyond the names of their parents. We have contact with two cousins still in Italy and I’m honestly not sure how I’m related to either of them.

        1. I’m Here To Help

          First record of my family coming over was a marriage record in 1625 in Jamestown. Not entirely sure how much earlier than that they came over. So if your family was there, they probably knew each other if nothing else!

          We’ve actually had good luck with our family going back. My uncles and father got our family back to when they came over, and we’ve actually found very distant relatives in Europe who traced it back farther over there. Like I said, there is one branch that we can take back to around 1000 AD (and the source of my surname – the were the Clerks of the village, thus my last name of Clark)…

    8. Roger Wilco

      23 and Me looks like it gives you more helpful information than Ancestry. I always question the source data/methodology for mapping nucleotide sequences to certain groups, the bias that might entail, and the overall essentialism it implies.

      In any case, for the reasonably paranoid who are interested in the data that comes from genome analysis, you can always anonymize your sample using throw away email addresses and something like a pre-paid credit card. https://venturebeat.com/2013/09/20/how-to-use-23andme-without-giving-up-your-genetic-privacy/ has a walk thru (including using a VPN to access the website).

      1. Thanks everyone

  19. The Late P Brooks

    And of course, it’s not clear that the organizers were sincere in their attempts to discourage bloodshed.

    PROVE YOUR INNOCENCE!

    1. Nice find

    2. Akira

      Sweet! I love buying old 78 records (1930 all the way back to the beginning of recording). I’d like to get into wax cylinders, but a working player costs hundreds of dollars, and as for parts and service, you better be MacGyver because damn near nobody knows how to work on those things anymore.

  20. The Late P Brooks

    Rambling blather

    OG History is a Teen Vogue series where we unearth history not told through a white, cisheteropatriarchal lens. In this piece, black feminist writer, editor, and critic Evette Dionne explains how many famous white people working for women’s suffrage were actually racist, too.

    tl;dr- White ppl suck

    1. Pat

      But enough about Margaret Sanger.

    2. Suthenboy

      Nothing says anti-racism like judging people by the color of their skin and never shutting the fuck up about race, black, white etc. Yep, seeing everything through the lens of race is totally not bigotry.

      Jesus Christ, these people are tiresome.

    3. Rhywun

      white women flocked to Rochester, New York, to plaster their “I Voted” stickers on Susan B. Anthony’s grave

      I’ll take “Shit That Never Happened” for $500, Alex.

      1. Mythical Libertarian Woman

        Oh, but it did. I know one of the crazies that did it, she was posting pictures on her Instagram.

    4. Chipwooder

      One thing Glenn Reynolds nailed was the need for someone with some sense to buy women’s magazines to offset the fact that all of them currently function as leftist propaganda.

    5. wdalasio

      Here’s the thing I don’t get. Have teenage girls really changed that much? This is Teen Vogue we’re talking about here, after all. When I was young, the major concerns of teenage girls were getting a “hot guy”, being part of the popular crowd, and the fashion and make-up decisions that would help them accomplish the first two goals (Okay, that’s a bit oversimplified, but not by all that much. It was sort of the common denominator.). They sure as hell weren’t all that interested in feminist intersectionality and the grievance Olympics.

      Have teenage girls really changed that much? Or is Teen Vogue just virtue signaling at a loss?

      1. Rhywun

        Have teenage girls really changed that much?

        My guess is “No”. The magazine has simply been co-opted by the SJW crowd as a propaganda tool.

      2. AlmightyJB

        Yeah, the brainwashing starts freshman year of high school now.

        1. C. Anacreon

          My son is a sophomore in high school. He was just telling me that his ‘global studies’ teacher this week talked about how Antifa wants to violently shut down free speech, which is ironic because that’s fascist, and aren’t they supposed to be ‘anti-fascist’?

          I was amazed when he told me. I still am. There’s actually a unionized public school teacher in the SF Bay Area who’s not buying into the overwhelming current narrative? There may be hope for all of us yet.

          1. AlmightyJB

            Thank you for that story. /moves hand away from Armageddon device.

          2. Custrel

            Sadly for every one of your son’s teachers there are 30 Yvette Felarcasses out there.

      3. PieInTheSKy

        I am thinking teen vogue does not pay all that well, and who are the kind of people who get jobs writing? Probably fresh out of gender studies college lefty women.

      4. Q Continuum

        How many teenage girls are going to read this and actually give a shit? Furthermore, the brainwashing has become so overt and is so ever-present, how long until it becomes itself an object of ridicule? Teenagers are pretty sensitive to, for lack of a better term, the “establishment” and it is invariably uncool, lame and should be rebelled against. IOW, how long before “Drugs are bad, mmmkay?” becomes “Racism’s bad, mmmkay?”

    6. Akira

      Why did they call it “OG History”? Doesn’t that stand for “original gangsta”? Why do they associate black-focused history with street crime? Isn’t that racist?

      (What if my entire post was questions?)

  21. The Late P Brooks

    Wow. Texas is a mess.

    1. Suthenboy

      Anyone hear from the Sloopy tribe?

      1. Suthenboy

        I talked to my father this morning. According to him most of what we see on TV is sensationalized.

          1. straffinrun

            “It’s a lot deeper back there.” I love her.

          2. AlmightyJB

            Lol

      2. Old Man With Candy

        Yeah, I’ve been talking with him and Banjos. They’re fine. Lotsa water.

        1. AlmightyJB

          Good to hear

    2. Custrel

      Why do you think the Mexicans didn’t want it?

  22. The Late P Brooks

    According to him most of what we see on TV is sensationalized.

    I don’t doubt that. Aside from power outages, I’m guessing most people are not suffering significant damage.

    That central power grid works fine, until it doesn’t.

  23. The Late P Brooks

    NeverTrumper calls for deep state revolt

    Much of this mess is of the Republican Party’s own making. Let’s not forget that Mr. Trump’s political rise began with his promulgation of the racist conspiracy theory that President Obama was not a natural-born American citizen. The Trump presidency is the result of years of destructive mental habits and moral decay. So there’s no easy solution for responsible Republicans. But there is a step they have to take.

    They need to accept, finally, the reality — evident from the moment he declared his candidacy — that Mr. Trump is unfit to govern. He will prove unable to salvage his presidency. As the failures pile up, he’ll act in an even more erratic fashion.

    Poor Peter Wehner. Trump done stoled his country. Boo hoo hoo.

    1. Rhywun

      “What a reasonable Republican, eh Muffy?”

      /NYT reader, stroking chin

    2. There is a convergence of acceptable opinion that is developing for erstwhile “conservative-types”.

      They must somehow oppose the Democrat Party without giving Pres. Trump credit for anything.

      They cannot enjoy Trump’s successful campaign against the leftist media, because he is racist/sexist/whatever, and hates free trade. They can’t cheer when Trump promises to continue the neocon foreign policy in Afghanistan, because he promotes protectionism.

    3. Viking1865

      Deep State’s pretty much won IMO. The swamp won the Afghanistan argument, and have successfully purged the national security apparatus of anyone who questions the Beltway consensus on foreign policy. The insurgents against the establishment who got Trump elected have been purged or shuffled to the side. Obamacare not repealed, tax reforms not happening.

      War’s over.

    1. Private Chipperbot

      I thought Cara was, i guess, interesting looking before, but that haircut is a mess.

  24. Q Continuum

    I can only assume that all the endless pushing by the Left of how irredeemably racist the US is means that IRL racism is dying off. It’s pretty obvious that the Left benefits from racial discord, and if the US really were hopelessly racist, they wouldn’t need to do anything but soak up the electoral wins by exploiting their wedge issue. But since they’re working so hard to convince everyone how racist they all are, it must mean that there’s less of a wedge issue to exploit.

    Basically, the overwhelming majority of people are pretty colorblind and the only ones this kind of shit appeals to are an ever shrinking cadre of mentally ill/retarded useful idiots. At least that’s what I hope.

      1. Rhywun

        “residents of color”

        FFS

      2. Count Potato

        Seattle is so white, they don’t allow black people in BLM.

        https://twitter.com/samlevine/status/901626300904779776

      3. Creosote Achilles

        Portland really is one of the whitest places I’ve ever lived. Though I find the article hilarious. HE ans his fellow race baiters can’t quite make the logical connection that Portland is a city infested with intersectionalism and that the intersectionalism is inherently racist and appeals to white, liberal racists. Of course, he wants to take full benefit of the grievance olympics to get free shit so It is hard to have any sympathy for him.

        1. Custrel

          1. You must not live in SE Portland.

          2. There’s a reason Lake Oswego is called “Lake No Negro.”

          3. And right next to Portland you have Hillsboro, also called… wait for it… “Hillsburrito.”

          1. Custrel

            Tldr: Portland is overall super white but some areas and suburbs are pretty colorful.

          2. There’s a reason Lake Oswego is called “Lake No Negro.”

            I thought all lakes were called that because blacks can’t swim.

          3. Custrel

            That’s just West Coast blacks if my boot camp experience was any indication.

          4. Creosote Achilles

            1. I use to live in inner SE Portland, which is incredibly white bread. Now, outer SE, yeah, but compared to where I grew up? Portland in general is whiter than South Park, Colorado.

            2. Sure, it is, which reinforces my point.

            3. Haven’t heard that one, but it’s really more descriptive of parts of outer NE than it is of Beaverton / Hillsboro, which is more like Little Indi-Stan with all the dot indians and pakistanis working at intel and such.

          5. Custrel

            From 82nd outward it was always fairly diverse, but a lot of Asians moved in the last twenty years.

            NE Portland was mostly Black since the Vanport days until 15 years ago. Now they have moved to SE Portland, Gresham, and Hillsboro to escape the flood of beta hipsters and white middle-aged lesbians.

            Hillsboro is mostly white and Mexican now, hence the slur.

            Its no LA or New York, Portland is pretty diverse and only about 75% white. 15 miles outside of Portland is probably 80 to 85% with Mexicans making up the second largest ethnic grojp.

    1. Gilmore

      I can only assume that all the endless pushing by the Left of how irredeemably racist the US is means that IRL racism is dying off.

      visual aid


      “”This poll from Gallup asks white Americans their support for school segregation and whether they would move out if a black family moved in next door. It declines from about 50% in 1960 to an amount too small to measure in the 1990s, maybe 1-2%, where it presumably remains today.””

      similarly

      “”a CBS News poll from 2014 asking Americans their opinion on the Civil Rights Act that legally prohibited discrimination. Once again, the number of whites who think it was a bad thing is too small to measure meaningfully, but looks like maybe 1-2%.””….

      …””Another Gallup graph here, with the percent of people who would vs. wouldn’t vote for an otherwise-qualified black candidate for President. It goes from 54% in 1968 to 5% in 1999; later polls that aren’t included on the graph give numbers from 4% to 7%, which sounds probably within the margin of error.””

      I’m a strong believer in the idea that if you want to answer a question, you approach it indirectly from 3-4 different angles and get lots of time-series data on all those peripheral-issues… basically ‘building a context’ around the actual question you’re trying to answer. You do this to sanity-check the range of plausible possible answers. You do this before you even try looking for a direct answer. That’s what Scott did in his ‘crying wolf’ piece (where these quotes come from). Its what makes it so difficult to challenge. and AFAIK i don’t think anyone anywhere has written any sort of rebuttal arguing that he’s understating the real degree of racism in America. If they did, i imagine they’d take the rout of claiming that “New Racism™” is more amorphous and unconscious – basically, impossible to define clearly, therefore impossible to measure. the ‘anti-science’ approach, basically.

  25. Count Potato

    “I think it’s ridiculous to have me choose between Hitler and Stalin which is what I consider what both groups are,” he added. “If you’re willing to set fires and burn places to the ground, that doesn’t seem like a very peaceful group to me.”

    One panelist, Daphne Goggins, said she is going to reserve judgement until the matter is fully investigated. Goggins said she is also convinced that not everyone at the rally was a neo-Nazi based on videos she saw on Facebook. When she tried to share those videos, she claims she was censored by the social media site.

    http://dailycaller.com/2017/08/23/charlottesville-panel-pushes-back-on-cnn-defends-president-trump/

    1. Q Continuum

      OPINIONS THAT CONTRADICT THE NARRATIVE WILL BE PUNISHED

  26. Q Continuum

    It may just be crazy enough to work…

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BWp8LZiFDvr/

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      If Nothing else KR is a successful business guy, Professional Rock stars have to be,

    2. westernsloper

      That’s just crazy talk.

    3. Should the second part be true weather part one is applicable or not?

      1. Should should be Shouldn’t

    4. Count Potato

      Simplifying the tax code is like ending the War On Drugs. Both parties are against it.

      1. westernsloper

        +1 metric assload of accountants and tax attorneys.

  27. Q Continuum

    Most terrifying music video ever made.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yModCU1OVHY

    1. AlmightyJB

      I like bananas as much as the next person but not sure I understand why they felt the need to turn that into a song.

        1. AlmightyJB

          I love that scene from Beetlejuice.

        2. dbleagle

          If you have songs about fruit this is also obligatory:

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tbgv8PkO9eo

    2. Akira

      Dunno man… There’s some competition in the field of creepy music videos for songs about Caribbean agricultural products.

  28. westernsloper

    Food safety officials today advised consumers not to eat some Brown Chicken Brown Cow Gourmet brand marinated mushrooms.
    There have been no illnesses associated with these products, but they were processed without documenting food safety controls, according to the Department of Agriculture, Trade and Consumer Protection’s Division of Food Safety.

    So someone forgot to write down some refrigeration temps and now the mushrooms might kill you. It is amazing we all don’t die due to our own kitchens and lack of FDA supervision.

    1. AlmightyJB

      The processes are probably all so automated that the documentation is completely redundant.

      1. Creosote Achilles

        This is generally true.

        I worked in food manufacturing for a number of years, and yes, a QA tech forgot to write things down but the process is likely to have still been in control. Or they may have written it down but a piece of paper got lost.

        Also, something like 97% of all illness/death from food is due to errors in the home. When proper cooking and sanitation procedures are followed in the kitchen the danger of contaminated food making you sick is incredibly tiny. The biggest culprit is chicken. The stuff is filthy, even when properly processed, it goes rotten quickly, people don’t handle it properly, and it can be tricky to get it done. Even still, cook it properly and handle it on separate surfaces while washing your hands thoroughly anytime you touch something besides the chicken.

        That said, we have the best food safety system in the world. The fact that even the number of borderline retards don’t kill themselves in the kitchen is testament to that. And the FDA/USDA/State Ag dept. have almost nothing to do with it. The real regulations are the various industry certifications that large suppliers require a manufacturer to have and they are much more stringent than the gov’t stuff. Those agencies could all disappear tomorrow and the only impact would be a decrease in prices because of all the money it costs to fund those agencies.

        1. Akira

          I’ve tried so hard to make the “progressives” in my life see it that way, but it’s tough. They’re convinced that the FDA is the only thing holding us back from some nightmare scenario where a skeezy restaurant owner sells rotten food “for a profit”. I’ve never gotten an explanation of how it can possibly be profitable to sell people food that puts them in the hospital.

          1. Custrel

            One episode of kitchen nightmares should convince people that restaurant quality depends on the owners and not the govt agencies.

          2. Creosote Achilles

            My favorite example is the full-time FDA monitor whose salary our company paid, and whose approval we needed before starting operations in the morning, and who could shut down any or all production lines at any time was dumber than a bag of mulch. We were testing out a dry ice / carbon monoxide cleaning system that would be cheaper and faster if it worked. The system was already FDA and USDA approved for that purpose. We were discussing it with her and she said, ‘That won’t do. The carbon monoxide will turn into water when it breaks down after evaporating and leave the equipment contaminated.’

            I stared at her for a solid two minutes. The utter lack of basic understanding of chemistry and the fact that our current method of cleaning was with water … it took me a moment (and I may have lost some SAN points), ‘We’ll take that under advisement. Your own agency approves the method though.’ We didn’t buy the system, but it was because it wasn’t robust enough and didn’t clean well enough for our standards.

          3. Creosote Achilles

            er, carbon dioxide. Not monoxide. Where is the edit function?

          4. westernsloper

            The FDA dimwit was onsite all of the time?

          5. Creosote Achilles

            Two of ’em. One for each shift. USDA showed up anytime we ran product that went into the schools. And the state Dept. of Ag would visit regularly.

          6. Custrel

            Why do the safety personnel always seem to be the least able to do the jobs they keep “safe”?

        2. Brasidas

          My favorite example of this is Walmart’s rotisserie chicken they cook and sell in store. Every chicken is tested for reaching a safe temp and is stored in a database so faults can be tracked.
          The local health department.might show up once a month and test a few.

    2. C. Anacreon

      Isn’t “Brown Chicken Brown Cow” the music that plays during porn scenes?

      1. C. Anacreon

        think boom-chicka-wow-wow

      2. westernsloper

        Not that it is any of my business, but what kind of porn do you watch? Barnyard Betty?

  29. Gilmore

    Colleen Dagg is being hailed a hero for beating up a another woman

    she wrote on Twitter….

    “”There were 2 examples of white privilege in the video. The woman in the blue dress tried to use her white privilege on me, the fact that I’m white too must have slipped her mind. If you see it, say something. It’s really that simple. Disclaimer; some people can’t handle the truth. Stay ready.””

    1) that’s not 140 characters. 2) it aint make no sense 3) tweeting seems a matter of stuffing as many woke-code-phrases as possible into your quasi-sentences

    the fact people are celebrating random fights in hotel lobbies as examples of ‘elevated social consciousness’ is a sign of how fucked things are

    1. commodious spittoon

      Dumbest generation.

  30. AlmightyJB

    Don’t know this for a fact but I would bet that there are very few jobs in St. Louis that were paying less than $10/hr even without the minimum wage.

    http://hotair.com/archives/2017/08/27/missouris-new-minimum-wage-law-will-complicated/

    1. Akira

      That’s what they do very often: raise the minimum wage to a level that doesn’t even exceed the prevailing market rate, point out that no massive job loss occurred (since the increase didn’t actually affect anything) and then try to use that as evidence that you can raise the national minimum wage by almost 50 percent and it will all be sunshine and rainbows.

      1. AlmightyJB

        Yeah, I agree.

  31. Count Potato
    1. commodious spittoon
        1. AlmightyJB

          That shouldn’t be controversial.

        2. commodious spittoon

          She makes a couple good points.

      1. AlmightyJB

        What I don’t understand is why after having her picture shown in the local rag about her having sex with a dog, that they feel a need to punish her further. Seems like a waste of money. Also, do they think the dog cares? Dogs eat poop. I doubt licking a vajaja is all that traumatizing.

    2. Yusef drives a Kia

      I wish my Dog had one, it looks like a Barbie Dreamhouse,
      and fuck the commenters, I’ll bet she DOES give to shelters and charity, why not?
      She’s a successful Business Person,

    3. AlmightyJB

      Paris may be vapid airhead but I would totally hit that.

      1. commodious spittoon
        1. Rhywun

          Way better w/o makeup for sure

          1. commodious spittoon

            Yeah, she looks a bit like a porcelain doll with it. Which I suppose is the point, but man oh man do girls not realize that when that foundation starts cracking it looks far worse than just laugh lines and crow’s feet?

        2. AlmightyJB

          Oh sure, show her visiting a children’s hospital and make me feel like a heel for calling her names:)

      2. J. Frank Parnell

        Do you want herpes? Because that’s how you get herpes.

      3. Lachowsky

        Fuck Paris. Her amd her bitch friend made a reality show in my hometown when I was in high school about how stupid we are. She can go choke on a bag of dicks.

        1. Plus she sounds about as intelligent as a plateful of beans trying to negotiate their way out of someone’s colon.

  32. commodious spittoon

    Wow. I didn’t realize I’m taller than both those men.

  33. Count Potato

    “The National Institutes of Health is spending roughly $200,000 on a study of tweets about electronic cigarettes.

    The project, “Toward Fine-Grained E-Cigarette Surveillance on Social Media,” will analyze hashtags and “follower-friend connections” of people talking about e-cigarettes online.

    Operating on the premise that the popular smoking cessation products are harmful, researchers say it is necessary to document what is being said on Twitter and Reddit for one year.

    “Electronic cigarettes (e-cigarettes) have emerged as the main smoke-free alternative to regular cigarettes over the past few years,” according to the grant for the project. “While the ongoing healthy scientific debate about their long term health effects and their suitability for smoking cessation are important, in this project, we propose computational approaches toward fine-grained surveillance of specific themes, factors influencing message popularity, and demographic variations.”

    “The overarching goal is to create new affordances for researchers and health agencies to leverage online social media platforms for knowing and reaching their audience in effective ways,” the grant states.”

    http://freebeacon.com/issues/feds-spend-199665-analyzing-tweets-e-cigarettes/

    1. AlmightyJB

      So how does an economy made up entirely of bureaucrats survive?

    1. AlmightyJB

      Didn’t sound like much of a condemnation. Sounds more like, I don’t think a 5-4 defense is the way to go.

  34. Derpetologist

    Spot the Not: Marion Barry

    1. These accusations of corruption are baseless, and besides, they can’t prove I stole that money.

    2. I promise you a police car on every sidewalk.

    3. If you take out the killings, Washington actually has a very very low crime rate.

    4. The brave men who died in Vietnam, more than 100% of which were black, were the ultimate sacrifice.

    5. First, it was not a strip bar, it was an erotic club. And second, what can I say? I’m a night owl.

    6. I read a funny story about how the Republicans freed the slaves. The Republicans are the ones who created slavery by law in the 1600’s. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves and he was not a Republican.

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      6

    2. AlmightyJB

      I’ll go with 5.

      1. leonadasiv

        Me too

    3. Rhywun

      They’re all so wonderful but oh what the hell – 4.

    4. commodious spittoon

      Well!?

      1. commodious spittoon

        Also, those quotes were all taken out of context. Bitch set him up!

      2. Derpetologist

        I like to wait at least an hour before I reveal the answer.

    5. Gustave Lytton

      I know it wouldn’t fool anyone, but how can a list of actual/possible Marion Barry quotes not include “Bitch set me up!”?

      1. Derpetologist

        Everybody knows about that one.

    6. westernsloper

      2

    7. J. Frank Parnell

      I’ll go with 5.

    8. Derpetologist

      1 is the Not. I made it up.

      1. The Zenome Project

        Oh hahaha

      2. DEG

        Excellent work, it sounded just like something Marion Barry would say.

      3. Custrel

        Wow. That is terrifying but not entirely surprising.

    9. The Zenome Project

      I say 3. Sounds too much like something Trump would say.

  35. commodious spittoon

    Jon Snow-inspired dildo.

    I wonder whether it’s actually Jorah Mormont’s shaft with the Stark pommel.

    1. Custrel

      The Jorah: Stone Men Edition shaftso are ribbed for her pleasure.

      1. commodious spittoon

        *scaled

      2. SugarFree

        4 out 5 stars
        My only complaint is that the outer wrapping is very difficult to remove.

        1. Custrel

          I threw up a little. Kudos, sir.

    2. Gustave Lytton

      Winter is cumming?

    3. John Titor

      Normalizing geek culture was a mistake.

      1. commodious spittoon

        Actually lol’d

      2. Count Potato

        “I am C3-Plug – human/anal relations. I am fluent in over 6 million forms of communication with a specialty in anal arousal. This shiny chunk of space metal can be your perfect anal companion.”

        https://geekysextoys.com/product/c3-plug/

    4. Count Potato

      $110?

    5. Akira

      “GeekySexToys.com”

      Am I the only one who finds it annoying how “geeky” is now applied to things that are totally mainstream? Star Wars and Game of Thrones are not “geeky”; they are two extremely popular media franchises.

      1. Rhywun

        And the media have been pushing “geek cool” for a couple decades now. It’s nauseating.

    1. westernsloper

      Reminds me of that Phoenix cop collecting disability and running triathlons. I am not sure if she lost her disability pension after being outed or not.

    2. Derpetologist

      I have come to believe that too many people go to jump school and that its risks outweigh its benefits given the relative scarcity of airborne operations.

      https://everything2.com/title/How+Airborne+School+nearly+killed+me

      1. dbleagle

        Jump school is a great recruiting tool so that is a large reason the Army sends so many people through. In the combat arms, especially the infantry, it is also an internal selection mechanism. Very few people end up in airborne units and remain “5 jump chumps” for their entire career. Having served many years in jump units there is an espirit that develops from the shared experience. But there are a few things to remember about airborne ops:
        – They are a niche capability. But are vital if your nation wants to be in the force projection business.
        – Special OPs have a higher requirement for the capability, but not at the current levels fielded within Civil Affairs, PSYOPS, Logistics and Communications. Still with the tiered readiness model you require a minimum of three times the capacity to have the required capability on hand 365.
        – There are only enough air assets to put slightly over one Brigade into a combat assault.
        – Under combat conditions (night, 500ft jump, minimal or no marking, all that gear, jump permitted in high winds) a 10% loss rate for the jump is automatically factored in. That does not include losses to air defense.
        – Jumping in areas of air defense is not a good idea.
        – Jumping is simply a way to commute to the job site. Your job starts on arrival. You want to sport jump? Join a freefall club.
        – It is fun, but there is a reason you get another $150/month and that is not to make daytime, equipment free, helicopter jumps. Get you and all your gear into that C-130 to jump at Zero dark thirty with 64 of your closest friends.
        – The jumpmaster will check your shit, but you still have to jump it. So be careful with your equipment.
        – Plus the additional Special Forces statement. You can fly us to the drop zone, but we are going out the ramp only if we are confident you got us to the right place.

        1. commodious spittoon

          You have convinced me never to jump from an aircraft, or indeed to jump at all.

        2. Custrel

          It’s still only 150 a month for jump pay? It was 110 a month 30 years ago!

          1. commodious spittoon

            $110 buys you a Jon Snow-styled dildo.

        3. Derpetologist

          I read something like since 2014, there have been about 64,000 individual jumps and 3 fatal training accidents at jump school. So the odds there are good. But I’ve met guys who got hurt badly there and it cut their careers short.

      2. Gustave Lytton

        Yes. Airborne School is a weed out/ticket punch for many attendees. Even more over a career. Frankly many of the schools are like that.

        AATW

        1. dbleagle

          Ranger and Sapper schools come to mind from your statement. Ranger school is an outstanding leadership school for young officers and NCOs so I see a value in the current Army training model. I don’t know enough about Sapper school to comment on it. Air Assault training makes the 101st happy so I don’t see it going away even though it is not much value. “Badgefinder School” sums up Pathfinder since having the badge and not being a jumpmaster means no unit will use you.

          With the huge cost in time and resources for Special Forces training I am confident the Army will keep it as the gateway to serving in SF only.

    3. Gilmore

      Haven’t watched video; that said, i know guys who’ve “broken their back” which actually involved some compressed /fractured disks, not like a freaking severed spine. i think its possible to have a severe back injury that might disqualify someone from near-term military service, but which they could recover from sufficiently to be a perfectly adequate (if not above-average) cop.

      I think if fat-asses can be police… this ‘physical intensity’ thing is a tad over-stated.

      1. commodious spittoon

        Things I didn’t know until just earlier because I googled it: Serpico was a real dude.

        Haven’t seen the movie, though. Worth a watch?

        1. Gilmore

          Yes, its a great movie.

          I’ve heard the film exaggerates + distorts a lot of the real story, but hey, its a movie. I think the degree to which police were corrupt was probably overstated, as was the degree to which his efforts actually ‘helped clean things up’.

        2. The book is worth a read also.

    4. Akira

      There were horribly unfit people working as officers at the prison. There was a lady who was about five feet tall and shaped like a fucking blueberry; she was also incredibly stupid to top it off. Then there was the 70-year old man who had joint problems everywhere, macular degeneration, heart problems, and kidney issues that necessitated bathroom trips every 20 minutes or so.

      1. Derpetologist

        half-remembered quotes

        “If you go to a prison, you will see the worst of the human race. You will also see prisoners.”

        “The prisoners have to be there. The guards choose to be there.”

        “Prison guards are people who are too fat and dumb to be cops. Let that sink in.”

    5. Ironside has a sad.

  36. commodious spittoon

    DPRK News Service‏
    @DPRK_News

    Fancy Irish Dancer Conor McGregor loses to Noted Illiterate Floyd Mayflower in boxing.
    Marshall Kim Jong Un undefeated in fight competition

  37. robc

    “People without conviction are at the mercy of circumstance.”

  38. commodious spittoon

    Man that Logan movie is so nakedly pro-illegal immigration that I almost can’t stand it. Okay, we get it, virtue signaling accomplished, you’re not going to break any hearts in Hollywood, sure, thanks, okay, yeah, no, we got it, it’s really pretty straightforward, no, you don’t have to worry about Tiffany hating you because you wore the same t-shirt, yes, it’s very cute, okay, yeah, GOT IT THANKS

  39. Press outlet becomes armchair psychologist machine and fever dreams up a Tillerson position that he didn’t ever seem to take or state.

    “We express America’s values from the State Department. We represent the American people, we represent America’s values, our commitment to freedom, our commitment to equal treatment of people the world over and that message has never changed,” Tillerson said. “I don’t believe anyone doubts the American people’s values or the commitment of the American government or the government’s agencies to advancing those values and defending those values.”

    “And the president’s values?” Fox anchor Chris Wallace followed up, to which the secretary of state replied: “The president speaks for himself, Chris.”

    “Are you separating yourself from that, sir?” Wallace asked.

    “I’ve spoken — I’ve made my own comments as to our values as well in a speech I gave to the State Department this past week,” Tillerson said.

    That’s hard hitting stuff, Becky.

  40. The Late P Brooks

    If only they had one o’ them magical vagina thingees, things would be hunky dory.

    The search for Uber’s new chief executive may be nearing a conclusion.

    Meg Whitman, the chief executive of Hewlett Packard Enterprise, was emerging as the likely candidate to be selected as Uber’s new chief on Sunday, according to two people with knowledge of the process, who spoke on the condition of anonymity because the details were confidential.

    Apparently, no does not always mean no. Not if you beg hard enough. Or offer to buy her nice things.

    1. C. Anacreon

      All right — Meg Whitman, truly part of the old boys’ network and a failed Republican candidate to boot.

      I think Uber believes that putting a gal in charge will stop their slide in use by the people who presently feel morally opposed to their company. I think they will be in for a surprise.

      Republican females don’t count as women to the PC crowd. Plus she’s white, cishet and able-bodied. I predict if she becomes the CEO, a shitstorm will commence.

      1. Rhywun

        Sounds like a perfect opportunity for a queer disabled Korean transracial and transnational adoptee woman survivor to me.

    2. Gustave Lytton

      Meg Whitman: failing your way to a successful career

    3. commodious spittoon

      HOW DARE YOU POST SEX TOYS TO THIS FAMILY-FRIENDLY WEBSITE.

      1. Roger Wilco

        Sex toy? I thought it was a banana peeler

        1. commodious spittoon

          *wilts*

  41. Gilmore

    I’m still too hung-over to contemplate this seriously, but it sounds like some sort of Legalistic Mobius Strip

    “Because the Amazon Defendants are operating a public accommodation(s), it is a violation of Title II of the Civil Rights Act of 1964, specifically 42 U.S.C. § 2000(a), for the Amazon Defendants to deny the Ministry the privileges and advantages of the AmazonSmile program on the basis of the Ministry’s religion and the beliefs that are inherent to that religion.”

    If the Commerce Clause gives government the authority to trump a businessman’s personal beliefs, even if couched as a First Amendment expression, then the same logic that requires Christian fundamentalists to bake “gay” wedding cakes against their beliefs ought to mean that Amazon has no right to deprive the Ministry of a public accommodation because they “don’t like” that Church’s view on gay marriage.

    maybe its not really that complicated at all; its just “the customer is always right”, taken to absurd lengths.

    but i think that leads to some very confusing situations, because of the ‘compelled speech’ angle, and the way retailers like Amazon are really just transaction-enabling platforms for various sorts of sellers, not a sole-proprietorship.

    basically, the argument suggests that Amazon can’t really bar any sellers from reaching any buyers with ‘anti-gay’ materials so long as those materials have some specific religious context.

    Or that labeling any religious speech, “hate” speech – something that has no real legal definition – would be a de facto violation of the CRA.

    you basically can’t really have your Civil Rights Act/Public Accomodation laws…. and “hate speech” too, basically.

    1. kbolino

      you basically can’t really have your Civil Rights Act/Public Accomodation laws…. and “hate speech” too, basically

      Oh, but you can. Just take away any semblance of legal/logical consistency et voila!

      1. Gilmore

        legal/logical

        I’m no lawyer, but i know enough law to point out that these two things often have very little in common.

        the whole problem of law is trying to reconcile an ever-changing reality with over-simplified, often poorly-constructed language … which end up inadvertently birthing even more bizarre subsidiary ideas as those laws are tested in cases.

        logic doesn’t have to deal with any of that mess.

    2. Custrel

      I’m still waiting for someone to honestly answer why you can refuse to host a website because you don’t like the PERFECTLY LEGAL content, yet mom and pop bakers must bake cakes for teh gayz.

  42. The Late P Brooks

    Dave Edmunds

    Just because.

    1. C. Anacreon

      Saw Rockpile live in 1980 — still the best concert I’ve ever attended.

  43. The Late P Brooks

    “If you go to a prison, you will see the worst of the human race. You will also see prisoners.”

    I have seen that one (similarly stated) attributed to Mister Clemens.

  44. Derpetologist

    Random thoughts

    I was reading a bit about Snowden’s army career. He enlisted as a special forces candidate and got a medical discharge 5 months later. He said he broke his legs in training but the army has never confirmed the exact reason. Most articles about him imply that he was discharged for misconduct.

    Many journos made a big deal about him having GED instead of a high school diploma, but what they leave out is the reason he got a GED is because he got mono and missed almost all of his senior year of high school.

    It’s interesting to see how once someone is declared an enemy, the facts are massaged to produce the desired narrative.

  45. J. Frank Parnell

    President Donald Trump’s pardon of former Arizona sheriff Joe Arpaio amounts to an endorsement of the idea of concentration camps

    TW: HuffPo

    1. The Zenome Project

      In an email to HuffPost Saturday, Andrea Pitzer, the author of One Long Night: A Global History of Concentration Camps, defined a concentration camp as a “mass civilian detention outside the standard legal process, usually on the basis of race, ethnicity, or political activity.” While Pitzer said Tent City was a prison technically constructed to hold those convicted by law…

      Well, then, it’s not a concentration camp. Inhumane? Probably. But instead of just saying that point blank, leftists always overreach. That’s why I frequently end up defending people that I would rather not defend.

    2. Winston

      Got to fit in the Trump is a Nazi stuff somewhere.

  46. The Late P Brooks

    Saw Rockpile live in 1980

    I was too lazy to drive all the way to Poughkeepsie from where I lived in Connecticut, to see them . I still regret that.

  47. Creosote Achilles

    Venezuela Hunger Mystery

    They interview an “activist” who went from a middle class lifestyle to eating from a gov’t foot box and people who still support Chavez and Maduro…

    Fuck ’em. They asked for it, they got it. Let ’em eat cake. I feel bad for the people who have been fighting it. But when are they going to get it through their heads? this is the inevitable result of trying to eliminate economic disparities. You eliminated them alright, everyone winds up with jack shit.

    1. Akira

      “Everything that Chávez built with his hands has been kicked down.” – a starving mother interviewed in the article

      No lady, everything Chavez “built with his hands” has now come to fruition. This is the result.

  48. The Late P Brooks

    this is the inevitable result of trying to eliminate economic disparities incentives.