ZARDOZ SPEAKS TO YOU, HIS CHOSEN ONES. ZARDOZ UNDERSTANDS THAT TODAY IS A BRUTAL CELEBRATION OF “HALLOWEEN”. ZARDOZ WILL PERMIT THIS, AS IT LEADS TO MUCH UNHEALTHY BEHAVIOR AMONGST BRUTALS – RAZOR BLADES IN APPLES, DRUGS CONCEALED IN CANDY AND DESTRUCTION OF BRUTAL PROPERTY BY VANDALISM.
IN AN EFFORT TO MOVE THE BRUTAL CELEBRATIONS ALONG, ZARDOZ HAS GIVEN YOU, HIS CHOSEN ONES, AN OPEN POST. DISCUSS YOUR DISGUISES YOU WILL DON, IN ORDER TO MOVE AMONG THE BRUTALS… COSTUMES, DISGUISES…THEY ARE FUNCTIONALLY THE SAME.
ZARDOZ WILL START OFF THE SUBJECT FOR HIS CHOSEN ONES:
THE CLASSIC “ZED” LOOK
GO AS ONE OF THE ETERNALS
OR, FINALLY
AN EASY ONE, ARTHUR FRAYN
ZARDOZ WOULD INQUIRE OF HIS CHOSEN ONES – WHAT DISGUISE…”COSTUME”… WILL YOU USE TO WALK AMONG THE BRUTALS? COMMENT BELOW! ZARDOZ HAS SPOKEN.
I’m Garth Marenghi!
Richard Ayaode made that show.
he did. I love Darkplace.
I’m going as something truely original.
I will be dressed as a middle aged software test automation engineer.
It’ll be a stretch but I think I can pull it off
But will you use that disguise to cleanse your fellow brutals?
I am reminded of an old comic…
But that’s already what half the Glibs are going as!
BOOK FACE
That might be hard to pull off!
I have done 2 costumes this season. Saturday night I went out as Rockabilly Guy. At the office today I am Man-bun Ken. The office thing is a group project where a bunch of us dressed as Ken as a goof on one of our millennial co-workers who wore a man-bun one day and we will never let him live it down.
That’s a great public service you are doing by never letting that guy live down his man-bun. Hopefully this sort of behavior spreads across the country.
Hey! Rockabilly guy is a culture, not a costume! Unless you’ve got enough beer and bourbon to share, then you’re cool man.
My wife shot down my idea and my backup idea. My first choice was Harvey Weinstein. Second choice was Michael Jackson with an IV bag of Propofol.
We’re going as Jack and Coke. Her idea, so I’m taking it as explicit permission to drink as much as I want.
As long as she is “Coke”, right?
“Original formula”?
“Mexican Coke”
“(((Coke)))”
Would a Michael Jackson costume be evil racist blackface, since you wouldn’t actually have to use any blackface for it?
Well, Jackson was pretty much white before his death.
Black people have to whiten their faces to dress as Michael Jackson. I find it…disturbing.
Attempted kidnapping at gunpoint this morning in my hood:
http://www.dailybreeze.com/2017/10/30/man-arrested-in-attempted-abduction-of-13-year-old-in-rancho-palos-verdes/
Horrible timing, bro. Horrible timing.
I’ll see your attempt kidnapping, and raise you a dismemberment killing (in my town, they lived right on my route to work)
Jesus.
You guys are really out of your game here, I live in Baltimore.
…
I concede the point.
http://dailycaller.com/2017/10/06/baltimore-racks-up-double-chicagos-gun-homicide-rate-in-2017/
Florida Man has you all beat.
(repost from morning links)
In our prime, Richmond totally had Baltimore beat! Of course, even at our worst, we couldn’t outdo New Orleans – they were #1 in murder rate in 1994 when we were #2.
No van with candy? What an amateur.
Seriously. they’re already too old by 13
Has anyone seen OMWC this morning?
You guys got nothin
Special Report: In warehouse of horrors, body broker stacked human heads
Reuters
Probably going to sell it to China.
On Saturday my wife was dressed as a voodoo doll and I was going as a an old-timey voodoo guy. I had the skull makeup and everything. Just as we were leaving for the party, I got severe diarrhea and had to stay home, so I read Sherlock Holmes and watched the Blackhawks lose badly.
Tonight my father in law and I are continuing our tradition of taking the kids trick or treating, while we smoke and drink. I’ll be going dressed as a bundled up guy in winter.
This year I went as Commander William T. Riker
Had a good time making stupid puns and saying things like “energize!”
I was Lahey one year, wearing cowboy boots and a bathrobe. I even shaved the top of my head.
It was great, I got to carry around a fifth of whiskey and say drinkey-poo and shitblizzard.
I stumbled over everything, and got to act like a super drunk all night. (that part got easier as time went on)
That’s a great idea! Would have been really timely if you did it this year.
Don’t know if I would have the dedication to shave my head, but one thing I can do really well is be visibly drunk at a Halloween party. Just a little drinky-poo, Julian.
My friend was a little bigger then, he was randy. He just wore khakis and offered me drinks very loudly in public. We had walkie talkies and as we’d pass some other college kids, I’d drunkenly ask them if they’d seen bubs running around.
I’m going as someone who cares.
I love Halloween, unfortunately I’m a single white male so handing candy out to the kids is frowned upon now. *has sad*
If you dress as your avatar, all will be forgiven.
I wish. Might next year though that would be awesome.
Agreed!
Don’t be sad, I’ll dress up as something and go to your door. But I get the whole bag of booze and drugs.
Dress up like a politician. Then you can kiss all the babies and people will love you for it.
I just need a fake smile and a bunch of dirt and scum hidden underneath my clothes right?
Politicians have bodies, yes.
*OMWC perks up*
Forget about the candy and get a hooker.
Maybe 2 since it’s a special occasion.
The thought process in this video is eerily similar to that which dominates mainstream paleoclimatology.
Yep. Cherry-picked to reach the conclusion he wants. Countervailing evidence: ignored.
Good grief, I didn’t get 5 minutes in. Another crackpot.
I have a theory that the great flood was not a great flood at all, but an accidental transposition of characters when the monks were setting the type in the bible. You see, instead of “great flood” it was supposed to read “fleat good.” Fleat is an acronym for Flared Energy Absorbing Terminal. They put them on the end of guardrails to reduce vehicular damage on impact. Everyone knows the Romans were great at building roads, and although no one knows who invented fleats, it was probably the Romans, or maybe the Mayans. Without good fleats, old people like Noah would more easily die in car accidents, which is why he’s not here today to correct this error in the bible.
So SUVs really were causing warming 6000 years ago?
I think there may have been a flood, but it was a local event. I can’t remember now, but there was an older story named the Epic of Gilgamesh and maybe an even older story that was based on.
I’ve heard the Mediterranean flowing into the area that is now the Black Sea. Was it even dry during the ice age, or is that more crackpot stuff?
No mention of Mayan cities in the Bible? Well, gee, I wonder why. People outside of the Americas had no knowledge of civilizations in Central America until the 1500s. I wonder if that has something to do with it?
This was not me:
Man shows up at ND bar in KKK costume
I’m gonna guess it was some Minnesodan who snuck across the border.
Seems inoffensive enough?
Worked for Cartman
Arthur Frayn always looks like he’s wearing a pair of boxers on his head.
Hmmm….maybe I could try that tonight!
Like this
http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/blackadder/episodes/four/four_goodbyee.shtml
I’m not wearing a costume today, but my wife dragged me to a Halloween party last Friday and I went as Walter Sobchak. Easy enough – I’m already fat and own similar clothing, just had to grow a beard and get a fishing vest.
Couldn’t find those glasses, though, otherwise it would have been perfect.
If you’re looking for cheap sunglasses, DOOMco is your expert. Or flannel.
…I actually was looking through a website for the glasses. Zunni no longer makes them.
fuck.
I scoured drug stores and dollar stores across the metro area and could not scrounge up a pair of aviators with gold frames and amber lenses. I’m sure I could find some online but I’m simply not that committed to dressing up for Halloween, which is why I picked Walter in the first place, because it required little effort.
Gold High Definition Yellow Lenses HD Aviator Sunglasses HD-01 https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00KUJ4USO/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_RRp-zbHCYBFAV
Ten seconds on Amazon. Step into the 21st Century, friends.
I dressed all in black — I’m Johnny Cash, the Devil, or whatever you prefer. In any case, it’s probably the only acceptable costume for an adult to wear out in broad daylight on Halloween.
And then there is the guy who passed me on the street, wearing a nude-colored bodysuit with a three-foot dong dangling off the front.
Several years ago, on my way to a Halloween party, I stopped at a store to pick some things up to bring. I’m walking through the store, and I see a mother move her children to the other side of her so that the mother would be between me and the kids. At that point I realized that walking through a store in full Alex Droog-wear (including eyeball cufflinks) could be a bit strange for some parents. So I started whistling Singing in the Rain.
Hi hi hi hi there! Welly welly welly well……
So…a little of the old ultra-violence?
You were at the store to buy milk, right?
You all and your dirty crotch rot.
https://pjmedia.com/lifestyle/do-you-live-in-one-of-the-most-sexually-diseased-states/
I lived in 2 of the top 10.
You’re welcome.
I have a hard time believing New Jersey is one of the least sexually diseased states. Perhaps I’m defining sexual disease incorrectly.
Snooki and the Situation are not, technically, “diseases”.
No, they just create new ones.
Of course it’s all red states, what do you expect from deplorables?
Remember when I said there were no sexy Halloween titties? SIKE!
https://archive.is/3C9Dq
Njoi.
I’ll take #1. Y’all can have the rest.
2-50
…
or
2
13
50
guess I shouldn’t be greedy
Q: You know your womenz, buddy. Any one of these is ideal for home fapping. So uh, which will it be?
The Swissinator: [clicking the link] All.
Q: I may close early today. There’s a 15-day wait on the multi-women pics but the singles you can take right now.
55 had such potential, but holy shit is her house a pigsty.
Ladies, take a minute and consider your surroundings, please.
That said, I’ll fight Mad for 1.
You’ll get nothing and like it!
*drops gloves*
I have a witch’s hat.
Witch please! /sassy black woman voice
But do you weigh as much as a duck?
We both float, so I’m going to go ahead and say, “yes.”
We all float.
*it*
I think I’ll dress up as a middle eastern fellow.
http://imgur.com/YC6GSlM
You could be Yassar Arafat, but it’s already too late to not bathe for a year.
The last time I went to a costume party was years and years ago, when I was still studying aikido. The “full-dress” aikido uniform is pretty much a samurai costume, especially when you have an old-school katana/wakizashi set to finish it out with. Bonus: its the only costume I’ve ever worn where I was actually armed.
Wow, those ladies must be mad at each other
I was the engineer from Team Fortress 2 once. I even had my CZ 82 tucked into my toolbelt.
This should surprise no one here.
Oh HELL YEAH.
I would want to be the pyro.
If I just put on dark sunglasses and drink scotch at my desk, does that count as Halloween participation?
Sure, but you have to get into the spirit of the season and set up something to scare little kids.
Oh, wow…
We used to have a Halloween costume contest here at work, including team costumes. My plan after last year was to have the legal department come as the galley slaves from Ben Hur, with me being the dude with the drum. Sadly, the contest was cancelled this year.
Listen up, you are all condemned lawyers here…You exist to serve this department. Therefore, litigate well…and live!
I could pull of man who has been building a back deck on his house all day.
http://imgur.com/0LGERqA
Do you mind if I stop by as man who’s stealing a really nice quad?
That’s my baby. you leave it alone sir.
What advantages does this motor car have over, say, a train? Which I could also afford.
Trains are for progs and commies. Side by sides are for freedom loving red blooded americans.
Survey tripod? Fancy.
If you want your work to be level, its really the only way to go.
Thanks for leveling with me. From now on it’s the straight and narrow path.
You’re such a square.
*narrows gaze*
Thanks for the visual arbitration.
Careful, he might level another narrow gaze on you.
he just flat out gave you some good advice.
You’re plum-right about that!
That’s plumb crazy, some tubing and water works better.
Nice work. When you’re done, want to swing by my house?
I’ll make sure there’s TWO cases of Colorado’s finest for you.
I’m going the lazy route this year, as I have the feeling we won’t be getting too many kids braving the upper 30’s weather for long.
report of active shooter
Or a car?Twitter man has video
he’s not wrong.
I was shocked, the most reasonable comment I’ve seen on Twitter.
That is a terrible costume, Doom!
it’s not me
Damn Amish drivers! Why oh why can’t they stay in Lancaster? And when will we finally have common sense car control?
It’s freezing here in Michigan, so our group costumes of Tyvek biohazard outfits looks fantastic. I’ll be the drunk one.
I’m going as an Uber driver. No really, I’m going to make some money ogling* the hotties who I pick up.
*In the least creepy way possible since it’s a college town and they’re often quite young. The students usually love me and often ask for relationship advice and stuff.
I will just do what I always do: Stop shaving and put a towel on my head.