Friday Afternoon Links

Man is it afternoon links time already? Damn. Today has just flown by. It must be all those meetings. Nobody told 25 year old me (or even 30 year old me) that as you move up the ladder, you’re still responsible for your weekly output as well as 15-20 hours of meetings a week. I thought those meetings would count towards my output. Oh well. I don’t have to stay late or work over the weekend so let the fun begin!

Damn, bro. Your lawyer should charge you triple for being a dumbass. Shut the fuck up, go your ass to jail, and give your lawyer a chance.

Not how it works at all

Global Warming — good for the Ozone Hole. And crops, and not freezing to death.

For you TSLA shorts, if the market were rational, you’d make a killing. Don’t lose your ass thinking it will finally go rational. Of course, if the market were rational, the opportunity for such a huge short wouldn’t exist.

It sure is nice to have visitors, part time residents, and renters carry 1/3rd of my tax burden.

Donna Brazile must know there’s a note in her own handwriting saying something like, “Hillary, of course I’ll rig things to get you elected. — Donna”.  But right now, I’m really enjoying one of the least competent politicians in America getting pilloried by her former allies.

A little friday pop groove.

Comments

450 responses to “Friday Afternoon Links”

  1. Q Continuum

    As promised tits!

    http://archive.is/5bXHy

    2, 32 Lordy, Lordy.

    First?

    1. bacon-magic

      1st thru last.

      1. Trigger Hippie

        Though not necessarily in that order.

    2. Tundra

      38 seems nice!

      1. Q Continuum

        She has a solid investment portfolio.

        1. Just Say’n

          I respect your priorities: Posting here versus doing something necessary for work.

    3. So did you find the passport?

      1. Q Continuum

        Dammit no.

        *puts on dunce cap and goes to corner of shame*

        1. peachy rex

          I once couldn’t find my passport right before a trip, spent a day tearing my apartment looking for it, gave up and got an expedited replacement, came home and immediately found it…. and discovered that it would have expired while I was abroad, and so would have needed expedited replacement anyway.

          Make room for me in the corner, bro.

    4. mexican sharpshooter

      #9 Arizona State, schweet.

      Any what the hell is Ron Swanson doing in there?

    5. This Machine

      19 plz.

      1. Tundra

        Looks pretty demanding.

        1. This Machine

          I’m a sucker for punishment.

    6. Florida Man

      16, 26, 34

      1. creech

        #34 seems wholesome and probably has a brain to go with the big titties. I say we draft her as the next LP presidential candidate.

    7. Lackadaisical

      #13, would.

      1. Q Continuum

        Oooooo 31…. six eyes.

    8. Troy

      Tits should first every day

    9. Sour Kraut

      11, baby, 11!

    10. pan fried wylie

      Does #27 have an erection, or is she just happy to see me?

    11. RBS

      3. What the fuck is wrong with you people?

  2. Q Continuum

    For any Glib who’s loved someone:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSfOB8ANdWU

    1. Playa Manhattan

      Baker Street or GTFO

      1. Gerry Raferty – the Man Who’s Band Smoked Scotland Empty of Ganja.

    1. Rufus the Monocled

      She’s just a nasty woman. Some people are exactly as they display themselves to be. I’m sure she’s bad news in person.

  3. But right now, I’m really enjoying one of the least competent politicians in America getting pilloried by her former allies.

    Honestly, the Trump presidency is worth it just for these kinds of things.

    1. bacon-magic

      ^^^
      *still drinking tears bottled from election*
      The ones after are a bit bitter for my taste…maybe UnCivilServant will buy them.

      1. Q Continuum

        bitter =/= bland

        1. bacon-magic

          Yeah I failed.
          *jumps from window again*

          1. Q Continuum

            If at first you don’t succeed….

            That’s why those people with ties to the Clintons always shoot themselves in the head twice.

          2. Bobarian LMD

            If at first you don’t succeed….

            Try a higher window?

          3. bacon-magic

            You just told me to kill myself…I am on the internet! Thanks.

          4. Tundra

            Don’t do it!

            The world is a dark enough place already.

          5. bacon-magic

            Bacon-Magic dies in darkness
            *lights go out as I’m placed in skillet, sizzling sounds ensue*

          6. jesse.in.mb

            NOOOOooooooooo!!!

            If Bacon-Magic has gone out of the world, what’s left?

            *Turns to the dark art of necrophagiomancy, eats bacon-magic*

          7. bacon-magic

            *Rises whole from grease in pan(cuz’ I’m magic yo)*
            Awwwwww thanks for honoring my spirit Jesse!

    1. Maybe she can do a Final Cover for us?

      1. Q Continuum

        About anal prolapse?

        *runs*

        1. *flings magazines at retreating Q*

      2. Mythical Libertarian Woman

        I already made next month’s so oops. But maybe I’ll have January be the grand finale. When are they shutting down? Immediately, or some months from now?

    2. jesse.in.mb

      Declines in teen pregnancy hardest hit.

        1. Garfunkel and Oates will NOT be getting any Christmas cards from the Vatican any time soon.

          1. Festus

            “I’ve emptied my bowels and laid out the towels!”

    3. PBRstreetgang

      When being Woke goes wrong.

    4. Rufus the Monocled

      Wow. That editor Picardi sounds like a charming guy. What a useless dipshit.

      I have a daughter and while we don’t usually get worked up over stuff that ‘Teen anal’ piece was indeed out of line. Waaaayyy out of line. Worse than anything Trump has said to these leftist morons.

      1. Suggest alcohol education predicated on the fact that since the kiddies are going to drink anyway, why not teach them to do it safely.

        1. Bobarian LMD

          Drinking and buttsecks?

          Party at Ted’s.

          1. Playa Manhattan

            Hey…. where are all of the other people that you said would be here????

          2. *prolonged STEVE SMITH call*

        2. pan fried wylie

          I do suggest as much. I also don’t agree with the drinking age concept in general, so, grains of salt and all.

          If my hypothetical kid wanted to get a paper route and spend his earnings on beer and smokes, that’s between me and xim/xer.

    5. mexican sharpshooter

      Haven’t you people heard of “The Loophole”

      1. jesse.in.mb

        I’m so happy that was the link I was expecting.

      2. Trigger Hippie

        *sigh*

        One day I learn to refresh before posting. One day.

        1. mexican sharpshooter

          Its worth watching twice.

    6. Rasilio

      But wait without that article how can they take it up the but for Jesus?

    7. wdalasio

      Honestly, I’d venture the butt sex article was probably one of their better calls in the last few months. The content people were pulling from that outfit made no sense. It’s a fashion magazine for teen-aged girls, not a political forum for pudgy sophomores from Vasser and Oberlin. Trying to cram leftist, or any, politics into the magazine was a dumb idea from the start. The people interested in your magazine from the outset aren’t going to be the people your content is targeted to appeal to. And the people your content is targeted to appeal to aren’t going to be all that interested in your sponsors’ products. This really wasn’t something that should have been terribly hard to figure out – dating tips, cosmetic tips, fashion updates and celebrity gossip. It’s an easy mix that gets a teen girl audience. And they fucked it up. Everyone involved in that trainwreck of a magazine deserves to have their next gig be at Siberian Wear Monthly.

  4. Interesting podcast on the origins and importance of checklists in high stakes professions. The most fascinating part was that efficacy improves when there is voluntary buy-in.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      I’ve got that book. Reading it is on my checklist of things to do.

      1. I put The Goal in my physical queue based on your recommendation. Nothing but leisure this weekend, my work week was nightmarish.

        1. *leisure reading

  5. Juvenile Bluster

    Blizzard fucking killed it today with their cinematics. Overwatch and WoW both.

    Overwatch: Honor and Glory

      1. Yusef drives a Kia

        Bad ass, I might go back now, Five years was plenty but……..

        1. Pan Zagloba

          Eh, it’d work better as cinematic for hypothetical WC4.

          They still haven’t topped the original opening cinematic for WoW, which had the message of “Look at the cool stuff YOU can do.” They are too hung upon “Look how cool our NPCs are, peasant!” now (Pandaria was an exception, and Burning Crusade only had that for a bit).

          1. pan fried wylie

            I’d slaughter a village worth of orphans for WC4. Two villages worth if i can slaughter a village of orphans in the game too.

    1. Brett L

      Can I get a version of Diablo I that will run on a modern computer?

      1. pan fried wylie

        Have you tried 3? I was wary after being disappointed by 2, but found it as fun as the original.

      2. dorvinion

        I’d say look into dosbox as a means of making it run.

      3. dorvinion

        Or just do D3

        Three has a lot to offer with the seasons as a good incentive to mix things up every 3 months.
        I usually run the first 6-8 weeks of a season and then give it a rest until the next one starts to switch up to a new class.

    2. Pan Zagloba

      God dammit, you already made The Last Bastion, stop with the feelz already! It was bad enough with Mei, but I liked Rheinhardt alrady.

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        Agreed.

        Also they need to make Torb’s daughter a hero.

  6. Also, thanks very much for the fine musical selection. One of my favorites of all time. … OF ALL TIME.

    1. bacon-magic

      Amen sister.

    2. Just Say’n

      One of the best bands to come out of the 90’s

  7. Rufus the Monocled

    Seeking Alpha is all over Tesla. I think there are four of five covering it pointing out all the, erm, inconsistencies. I think one guy ‘Value analyst’ (I forget the name) is still positive on Tesla.

    1. bacon-magic

      Hello.

      1. Rufus the Monocled

        Oh shut up.

        1. DON’T ANY OF YOU WORK?

          1. Q Continuum

            *narrows gaze*

          2. Rufus the Monocled

            I’m currently peeling a clementine in the office.

          3. bacon-magic

            I’m currently peeling a clementine in the office.

            Canadian code for eating seal blubber.

          4. Q Continuum

            Don’t judge the man, fatties need love too.

          5. Florida Man

            I attended a lecture on Kumquats. This poor guy’s family went all in on kumquats because they are the most disease resistant citrus and then some beetles killed the entire crop and Irma finished the job. Really sad, but I did learn about a kumquat beer called “Quat” and drinking it made me feel better.

          6. Playa Manhattan

            I’m sorry you had to go to a lecture.

          7. Florida Man

            Had to? No. I’m just a giant nerd that likes learning about stuff.

          8. Mad Scientist

            “Let’s see, should I go to a lecture, or go home to the wife? I guess it makes no difference.”

          9. Chipwooder

            We had a loquat tree in our yard in Florida. Tasty little fruit, but barely worth the effort since they’re small and about 2/3 of the fruit is the pit.

          10. Q Continuum

            “should I go to a lecture, or go home to the wife?”

            There will be kumquats either way.

          11. Did they try breeding alpacas, too?

          12. pan fried wylie

            Ted, quit making fun of my idea to farm angora goats that I never told you about.

            Now I’m thinking snails.

          13. Your office is in a cavern in a canyon?

          14. Chipping Pioneer

            ALL WORK AND NO PLAY MAKE STEVE SMITH DULL RAPESQUATCH. AND BY PLAY, MEAN RAPE.

          15. Bobarian LMD

            AND BY WORK, MEAN RAPE.

            AND BY DULL MEAN HORNEY.

        2. Tundra

          HEY!

        3. bacon-magic

          Who put a hand up your ass today, eh?

      2. Mad Scientist

        You should have greeted him in Canadian.

          1. Q Continuum

            Hello eh.

            or…

            Bonjour eh.

  8. Playa Manhattan

    I have a question for you New Yorkers. Where can you actually drive 100 MPH in NYC proper?

    1. Brett L

      Does Brooklyn not count? He was doing it on the Gowanus.

      1. Playa Manhattan

        Is that 278?

        1. Chipwooder

          It’s a section of it, yeah. It’s the SIE in Staten Island and the BQE as you go north up into Queens.

      2. He thought it said, Gowan, us!

      3. What I think of any time I hear the word Gowanus.

    2. Mad Scientist

      On the bike path?

      1. Playa Manhattan

        Too soon?

        1. mexican sharpshooter

          It’s never too soon.

      2. Tundra

        Whoa.

      3. *thunderous applause*

      4. Q Continuum

        I am officially evil for LOLing.

      5. Sean

        Polite applause.

      6. This Machine

        BRUTAL.

      7. Scruffy Nerfherder

        Nice. ?

    3. Dr Mossy Lawn

      You want Manhattan? West side highway, FDR drive, 1st avenue through the UN tunnel.

      1. Playa Manhattan

        At 3am?

        1. Dr Mossy Lawn

          We regularly did it on Tuesday evening, say about 8pm. If you go fast enough through the tunnel you skip the red light sequence and catch up to the previous yellow light wave. Using two wheels is a help with acceleration and dodging taxis… Keeping up with the green light wave (up 1st ave, back down 2nd) wasn’t too hard with a motorcycle.

          1. Playa Manhattan

            This guy did it in a Mercedes. Drunk. With one eye.

          2. Mad Scientist

            Give the one-eyed guy a break. Getting drunk is the only way he gets stereo vision.

          3. Playa Manhattan

            “Officer, it makes me drive better!”

          4. Dr Mossy Lawn

            Yes, but on the Gowanus… anyone can do that.

    4. Gilmore

      “”Where can you actually drive 100 MPH in NYC proper?””

      the west side highway between 14th street and the GW bridge has long sections where there’s no on-ramps. people sometimes go tear assing around there at night. but they’re basically rolling the dice because there’s always cops rotating around there on either side.

      elsewhere… can’t think. i didn’t have a car in the city for 15 years.

  9. The Late P Brooks

    Q and A with Christina Hoff Sommers

    -What is equity feminism and how does that play into the ongoing sexual assault controversy on campus?

    Equity feminism is just about gender equity. It wants for women what it wants for everyone — fair treatment, respect and dignity. On today’s campus, equity feminism has been eclipsed by what I call “fainting couch feminism,” which views women as fragile and easily traumatized. It calls for special protections for women in sexual assault cases because it views women as an oppressed and silenced class.

    -You also call it victim feminism. What has been its effect?

    I think the rape culture theory was just an outgrowth of this infantilized view of women. The fainting couchers enlarged the meaning of sexual assault to include a lot of activities that most of us don’t think of as sexual assault. They collapsed the distinction between regretted sex and rape. An equity feminist does not assume that all sex under the influence is assault, or that men are automatically to blame. That’s not to say that sexual assault isn’t a real problem on campus.

    I doubt her “To be sure, rape is widespread” comment will save her from the wrongthink mob.

    1. Private Chipperbot

      I liked her better in the Bangles. Wait, different person?

        1. Chipwooder

          Holy shit, she’s almost 60?! Genetic lottery winner.

          1. Playa Manhattan

            I hate everything about the 80s except for her.

          2. Scruffy Nerfherder

            How could you hate Phoebe Cates?

          3. Tundra

            Mia Sara?

            Lisa Bonet?

            CINDY CRAWFORD??

            Playa started drinking at breakfast today.

          4. Scruffy Nerfherder

            I was waiting for Tim Curry to ravish Mia Sara in Legend.

          5. Chipwooder

            Whoever the chick that played Candy in One Crazy Summer is?

          6. PAULINA PORIZKOVA

        2. PBRstreetgang

          Wow, talk about aging well.

          1. pan fried wylie

            Fuck that, SHES A WITCH!!111

        3. bacon-magic

          She is a definite wood still.

        4. She’s in Marisa Tomei Territory.

  10. Playa Manhattan

    I learned my lesson about shorting Tesla. It’s no Chipotle.

    1. Rasilio

      I thought most people were more concerned with what Chipotle did to their shorts

  11. The Late P Brooks

    Where can you actually drive 100 MPH in NYC proper?

    Any side street.

  12. Juvenile Bluster

    Donna Brazile must know there’s a note in her own handwriting saying something like, “Hillary, of course I’ll rig things to get you elected. — Donna”. But right now, I’m really enjoying one of the least competent politicians in America getting pilloried by her former allies.

    Someone said it yesterday and it’s probably true: There’s something really, really bad about to come out about Hillary, and people like Brazille and Warren are abandoning ship before it happens.

    1. Brett L

      Given how much they’re kicking DWS, I assume that the House IT investigation will find that DWS sent emails explicitly fixing superdelegate selection in contravention of the DNC’s policy for doing so, and at the explicit order of HRC. But Brazile should have to go down with the ship. Similarly, neither Podesta should ever find work as a campaign consultant again.

      1. Rufus the Monocled

        ButJ Hillary needs to go down for so much more. I find it amazing this woman who allegedly orchestrated a rigged primary, laundered money through a pay to play foundation while SoS, destroyed Libya causing a massive human crisis migration – among God know what else including Whitewater – is still walking free. Worse, in plain public poking everyone in the eye. It’s epic in its criminality.

        1. Brett L

          Eh. I’m simply content that she’ll never hold Federal elected office or serve in another Presidential administration. Deserves got nothing to do with it, so I’ll take this.

        2. Mad Scientist

          This is one of the things that really disappoints me about Trump. He said during the debates that she belonged in jail. She still does, Donald.

          1. Sean

            He’s not even a year into his presidency. Nothing happens fast.
            I’m still hopeful that something will happen to her.

          2. pan fried wylie

            See, if Trump goes right after her and has to dig up her dirt, then he’s a big meanie. When all he has to do is wait for the dirt to surface and then, “hey, my hands are tied, I gotta do my job here.”

    2. Donna might be corrupt, but she ain’t stupid.

  13. The Other Kevin

    So Kim Dotcom and his associates got an apparently large settlement in the case of the cops raiding his house for the non-violent “crime” of running a file sharing site. I say good for him.

  14. The Late P Brooks

    I don’t know why my “formatting line breaks” get dropped, sometimes. It usually seems to be the last one. Oh, well.

    *shrugs shoulders*

  15. Playa Manhattan

    “It sure is nice to have visitors, part time residents, and renters carry 1/3rd of my tax burden.”

    I’m trying to remember where I was this year that had a ridiculous TOT and bed tax. It was almost 40% of the bill.

    1. Roger Wilco

      SPLOSTs are hilarious because they’re regressive (i.e. they affect lower income people more) but are pushed by progressives who want trains and streetcars and other stupid expensive shit

  16. Juvenile Bluster

    Your Buzzfeed hot take of the day, also known as “Jesus Christ he actually allowed that to be his profile pic for the article?”

    We should ban cars from big cities. Seriously.

    1. Mad Scientist

      6,000 Americans were killed by cars while walking city streets last year. As terrorists embrace this deadly power, car-free cities make even more sense.

      Then we’ll have miles and miles of asphalt available for choo-choos and community gardens!

      1. Plisade

        And Street Sweepers,

        “A street sweeper! A street sweeper walking in upon the World Council of Scholars! It is not to be believed! It is against all the rules and all the laws!”

    2. jesse.in.mb

      Umm that is definitely a lady Jessie. Although this is failing because of misinformed parents the ie spelling has frequently (but not exclusively) been used as an indicator that it’s short for Jessica.

      1. I was gonna say… … That’s a chick, innit?

      2. This Machine

        I’m… not convinced…

      3. Tundra

        My Great Grandma, the coolest chick ever, was a Jesse. Not short for anything, just Jesse. She lived in Mountain View, drove a V8 Maverick and used to take me to the beach at Santa Cruz.

        This silly twat doesn’t deserve to share even a hint of that name.

        1. Playa Manhattan

          Same with my Grandma. I made it one of the kids’ middle names in her honor.

          1. pan fried wylie

            They can start a V8 Grannies club.

            ….oh, or a club for Grannies named Jesse, like you actually meant. I couldn’t invent a name for that one because I don’t know how to pluralize ‘Jesse’.

      4. Juvenile Bluster

        I… wasn’t sure.

        I’m a bigot, aren’t I.

        1. jesse.in.mb

          Look, buddy, I’ve got no problem with you misgendering buzzfeed contributors, but when you start misgendering Jesses/Jessies/Jessis/Jessys a conversation is going to happen. capiche?

          1. bacon-magic

            Don’t make Jesse bust out the drum of lube.

          2. Mad Scientist

            “Don’t be alarmed. This is just conversational lube.”

          3. jesse.in.mb

            Yeah, you don’t have to worry until the Crisco and polyisoprene gloves come out.

          4. Bobarian LMD

            Is that the stuff with the fine grit?

          5. pan fried wylie

            Is that the stuff with the fine grit?

            No, Conversational Lube comes in an authentic Civil War era barrel with accompanying coffee table book.

        2. Lackadaisical

          To be sure, it looked like a dude.

      5. Chipwooder

        Well, it’s definitely a female Jessie, but I don’t think we can say how much of a lady she is without knowing more about her.

        1. Playa Manhattan

          Like if she chews with her mouth open and doesn’t use the salad fork?

          1. Chipwooder

            Precisely.

          2. pan fried wylie

            Does she kiss-and-tell?

          1. Q Continuum

            Jessie’s “girl” is not a girl shitlord. Report to the nearest Zyklon shower.

          2. jesse.in.mb

            I had a coworker who was obsessed with Rick Springfield (like used vacation time to see him in concert in multiple venues across the country per year), and every time I’d walk into a room she’d drop to one knee and start belting the chorus. I’m not a fan of the song at this point.

          3. Tundra

            One of my best friends is a Jessie. I think his wife is more sick of the song than he is.

          4. Q Continuum

            Maybe she was just trying to straighten you out?

          5. Bobarian LMD

            Conversion Therapy.

          6. jesse.in.mb

            I’ve been informed a few times that lady coworkers have been very forward with other staff about wanting to jump my bones, so possibly.

          7. Q Continuum

            Have any been successful?

          8. jesse.in.mb

            Coworkers? Yes. Lady coworkers not-so-much.

          9. *Sheds a single hot tear of jealousy*

          10. jesse.in.mb

            *Sheds a single hot tear of jealousy*

            That I’ve had lady coworkers want to jump my bones or that I’ve romped with coworkers full stop?

    3. Q Continuum

      Is this one of the low T Buzzfeed folks?

      1. Playa Manhattan

        She’s probably in the upper range of all employees.

      2. Derpetologist

        He’s also low IQ. Hell of a combination.

    4. Dr. Fronkensteen

      We need common sense car regulation. No one is trying to take your cars away from you but no one needs more than 4 cylinders. We need to ban private sales of cars as well.

    5. Derpetologist

      From the Buzzfeed moron:

      “Terrorism is not predictable or preventable.”

      I don’t think I need to elaborate why, just wanted to point out the absurdity.

      In related news, it irks me that whenever someone suggests that perhaps since almost all terrorists are young Muslim men, anti-terrorism actions should focus on them, the inevitable response is “HURR DURR WHYCOME YOU HATES BROWN PEOPLE HERPDERP!”

      1. Derpetologist

        You know what, I will elaborate why the Buzzfeed dope is wrong about it being impossible to predict or prevent terrorism:

        ***
        Bruce Ashford, a Professor of Theology and Dean at Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary, contributed to Fox News his view of the latest terror attack and what he calls “Islam’s surprisingly complicated relationship with terrorism”:

        The horrifying attack in lower Manhattan that killed 8 people on Tuesday is a reminder that hardly a day goes by without an Islamic terror attack somewhere in the world.

        We are now familiar with the post-terror routine when a Western city is attacked. Government leaders note the need to shore up security and assure their people that every protective measure will be taken, TV commentators dutifully state that terrorism’s roots are not in Islam but in some other phenomenon.

        Is it really true that these terrorist attacks have nothing to do with Islam?

        No. But neither is it true that most Muslims are terrorists or approve of terrorism.

        Yes, at this point only the demented can continue to believe that these terrorist attacks by Muslims on Infidels have nothing to do with Islam. The pertinent Qur’anic quotes cited by terrorists before, during, and after their attacks, the ISIS or Al-Qaeda flags they wave or place on their vehicles, the cries of “Allahu akbar” after a successful attack — a war cry which, despite the BBC and many other misinforming media outlets, means not “God is great,” but “Our Muslim God is greater than yours” — all demonstrate that Islam has “something to do with terrorism.”
        ***

        https://www.jihadwatch.org/2017/11/hugh-fitzgerald-does-islam-have-a-surprisingly-complicated-relationship-with-terrorism

    6. R C Dean

      Umm, I hate to break to Jessie, but that was a truck that the terrorist drove, not a car. So banning cars wouldn’t really have made any difference, would it?

      The only way to ban trucks from major cities is to depopulate the cities first. I wonder if moving all the city dwellers out to the country has been tried before, and how it worked out?

      1. Tundra

        “Um, I would have to say the results were mixed.”

        /Pol Pot

        1. Mad Scientist

          That wasn’t real depopulation. That was just state ruralification. True depopulation has never been tried, you see.

      2. Q Continuum

        You’re wrong. The truck drove him. Just like guns magically transform people holding them into unhinged killers.

      3. Dr. Fronkensteen

        Moving the city people out to the country failed because they had the wrong top men. Next time will go better.

    7. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Nice hat

    8. ArchieBunker

      That would make the streets just right for someone to drive a big combine through there and make the Vegas shooting toll look like nothing. That’s assuming a combine can do more than 5 mph

  17. Juvenile Bluster

    It sure is nice to have visitors, part time residents, and renters carry 1/3rd of my tax burden.

    Dude, don’t fight it. The tourists are why we don’t have an income tax in Florida.

    1. Playa Manhattan

      No taxation without representation.

      I don’t remember voting in Florida.

      1. Brett L

        We also don’t force you to buy anything. But sleeping on the beach is illegal.

        1. Q Continuum

          Sleeping *with* someone on the beach OTOH…

      2. Florida Man

        You voted with your feet.

        *drinks PM’s milkshake*

        1. jesse.in.mb

          *drinks PM’s milkshake*

          Oh my.

        2. bacon-magic

          Tee hee

        3. Playa Manhattan

          You sneezed on my entire dinner.

          1. bacon-magic

            Euphemism?

          2. Mad Scientist

            You sank my battleship!

          3. Q Continuum

            You copulated with me!

            (misses point completely)

          4. bacon-magic

            You got your peanut butter in my chocolate!

          5. Q Continuum

            You might want to see a doctor.

          6. Sean

            You two need to get a room.

    2. Chipwooder

      That and the high gas tax, which is why I always went over to Bama to buy my gas when I could back when I lived in Pensacola.

      On the other hand, when I lived on the Bama side of the state line, I did my grocery shopping in Florida so I’d pay no sales tax on food.

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        When I lived in Tallahassee I’d drive up to Georgia for cigarettes.

        1. Playa Manhattan

          Kulak. Wrecker.

      2. Florida Man

        You widgets need to act how I planned!
        /urban planner

  18. Q Continuum

    Get out there and punch some Nazis/liberals/moderates/80 year-old grandmas/schoolchildren/retired racing greyhounds!

    http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2017/11/anti-fascist_group_plans_downt.html

    1. Chipwooder

      Your Barney Fife award of the day goes to…..

      Portland police said they know of no plans for violence during Saturday’s permitted event.

      Because people planning violent action generally make an explicit public declaration of such beforehand.

      1. Hey – we gonna split some wigs, just wanted to let you all know.

        1. Chipwooder

          Here’s the formal plan of attack for Saturday – if you’d like an electronic copy, just give me your email and I’ll shoot the powerpoint on over.

      2. R C Dean

        Watcha wanna bet that antifa has all kinds of social media traffic on their preparations for violence, which our crack team of popo hasn’t seen because they haven’t been friended by antifa.

    1. Sean

      I haven’t been keeping up on South Park episodes this season, but I just saw the Columbus Day episode this week. Those guys still got it. The dna testing and victim commercial was fantastic.

      1. Playa Manhattan

        I don’t want to spoil it for anyone who hasn’t seen it, but the part where he gets out the phone book is classic.

        They captured the essence perfectly.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder

      A tribute to an under appreciated movie.

  19. Stinky Wizzleteats

    You people are ripping off my totally original and never done before usage of Nicholson looking through the door as an avatar now? I’ll be expecting a royalty check in the mail.

    1. jesse.in.mb

      You seem like someone who needs a discount tomahawk.

      1. Stinky Wizzleteats

        Thanks but hacking people up with that would take forever.

      2. Chipwooder

        Discount Tomahawk would make an excellent band name.

    2. Florida Man

      They had a shinning house at Halloween horror nights this year. They did an awesome job. The Shelly duval scare actor was a dead ringer.

      1. Bobarian LMD

        The Shinning?

        For copyright purposes?

        1. Florida Man

          IM NOT A GUD SPELLIER. I’m comfortable with that fact.

          1. jesse.in.mb

            It’s ok, we all know you’re just here to look pretty and talk about tall, skinny, well-endowed men.

          2. Florida Man

            THIS guy gets me. ^^

          3. jesse.in.mb

            If I haven’t yet, I will eventually.

            *puts fresh straw in Florida Man-sized cage*

    3. Keep that up and you’ll get a cat-butt instead.

    4. Tell me about it.

  20. Private Chipperbot

    Thor movie review.

    I don’t want to say the author is a dumb ass but:

    Even its gangly title is a nod to the dumb space-words that populate the dialogue of superhero stories.

    Isn’t Ragnarok actual Norse religion stuff?

    1. sigh

      Yes, it is.

      the final destruction of the world in the conflict between the Aesir and the powers of Hel led by Loki — called also Twilight of the Gods.

      1. Private Chipperbot

        I was hoping for a KL review at ToS, but didn’t see one there this morning.

      2. Private Chipperbot

        Say, I just noticed Jeff Goldblum is in it. I assume you’re in line already.

        1. Oh, you bet! Probably won’t go see it in the theater this weekend, but it’s on the list!

        2. Florida Man

          Speaking of unconventional attractions, I think Ruby Rose is super hot.

          1. Mad Scientist

            What about Ruby Rhod?

    2. jesse.in.mb

      Yes, and it was also a major comic book event. Someone young and ill-informed enough might not know either fact though.

      1. Private Chipperbot

        The few comments there are already savaging the author.

    3. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Lighten up Francis

    4. Rasilio

      Uh, yeah

      It is basically the end of the world in the Norse mythology when all of the gods and giants and assorted others face off in one giant battle royale that results in the deaths of all of them and paves the way for a new world to be born.

    5. Chipwooder

      It was also one of Gwar’s best albums. MEAT! SANDWICH!

    1. ArchieBunker

      Would not

      It’s BS that they will give you a DUI on a horse, or lawnmower, or bicycle. I never really got into drinking much because of their DUI laws, instead going for less detectable drugs

    2. This Machine

      Gah! Fuck! Eye bleach! Eye bleach!

      *blindly scrolls up the page to Q’s first post*

    3. Scruffy Nerfherder

      *gollum*

  21. Derpetologist

    from a wiki article

    ***
    An essential part of the military reform is its down-sizing. By the beginning of the reform, there were about 1.13 million active personnel in the Russian Armed Forces. The planned reduction to 1 million servicemen will be advanced from 2016 to 2022.[3] Largely, the reductions falls within the officers. They used to account for about one third of the total strength of the Armed Forces: this will be reduced to 15%.[4]
    ***

    33% officers?!

    It’s nice to know that our rivals are even more bloated and top-heavy.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      How many generals do we have now? Are we still at an all time high?

      You would think they would run out of space at JFCOM.

      1. Chipwooder

        Last year, there were 886 generals and admirals.

      2. Lackadaisical

        I just found out that a bunch of people in my org. got promoted to generals. At the same level of what those generals are doing, we have a Lt. Col…

    2. Derpetologist

      From the wiki article of the guy named

      ***
      Addressing acute and long-standing issues such as the ineffectiveness of Russia’s defense industrial and procurement policies was also one of Serdyukov’s chief aims. The questions addressed included: “why, with so much spending on defense, do the Armed Forces possess so little new equipment? Why does the design and testing of many new types of armament take decades to show results?”[11] Serdyukov initiated modifications to the Russian military uniform and addressed the issue of the physical condition of Russia’s generals and senior officers: the entire service personnel of the General Staff, irrespective of rank, must now meet set physical standards upon threat of dismissal.[11] He also called for mergers of Military academies, sharp cuts in the number of military bases, and reductions in rear support and noncombat units.
      ***

    3. Private Chipperbot

      Wasn’t one of the problems with the Soviets that their non-coms wouldn’t take initiative without approval? Are they really top heavy or did they put officers in positions we wouldn’t?

      1. Derpetologist

        It’s a little of both. They didn’t have many NCOs for a long time, so there were more officers. Also lower officers and NCOs had less authority than in western counterparts.

        1. Chipwooder

          They also didn’t have much of a professional NCO corps. The vast majority of their NCOs had just as little experience as the lower ranks. They’d simply select some of the conscripts who seemed more capable and make them instant sergeants

    4. mexican sharpshooter

      I recall a story where a group of USAF officers visited a Russian unit and found that they had a Major (O4) where US units had a TSgt (E6) signing off on the maintenance work.

      1. Chipwooder

        Which is kind of funny, given how officer-heavy the Air Force is compared to the other services.

        1. Derpetologist

          Yeah. I was surprised to see a squadron headed by an LTC. A similar size Army unit is usually headed by a guy 2 ranks lower.

          1. Chipwooder

            My deployment to Uzbekistan was 17 guys. Our highest rank was a master sergeant. Not a single officer among us. You would never, ever see anything like that in the Air Force.

          2. thepasswordispassword

            Outside of Air Force Special Operations their strategic mission doesn’t exactly call for small independent units. Air power requires lots of support and logistics which leads to farts and darts.

        2. mexican sharpshooter

          I think the Air Force would benefit by bringing back Warrant Officers to fly. I don’t think having a BS history makes a guy a significantly better a pilot. It just allows pilots to form a cabal.

          1. Chipwooder

            I also don’t know why a warrant officer is sufficient to fly a helicopter but not fixed-wing aircraft.

          2. Scruffy Nerfherder

            There is no rational reason for that.

          3. mexican sharpshooter

            The AF actually cedes all its WO slots to the Army each year specifically for them to recruit rotor wing pilots. Like I said the pilots formed a cabal.

          4. thepasswordispassword

            If there are already too many people trying to get a pilot slot, why make it easier? There are flight qualified fools driving drones right now.

          5. mexican sharpshooter

            I’ve heard the opposite. They have a problem retaining pilots so it makes sense to pull from the enlisted that want to commission but can’t because there are no officer slots available–except for pilots. Drone or otherwise..

          6. thepasswordispassword

            Retension might be a problem since I know quite a few who planned to go into commercial flight as soon as their term was up, but pilot is also a ten year commitment. The problem is after the ten year mark. It does sound like there are a lot of operational problems with pilots stuck doing not-pilot stuff. At the same time, pilot slots (except for drones) are extremely coveted by officer candidates and are still highly competitive.

            The air force does have huge issues top to bottom with personnel where they’re pushing out capable people in one area while throwing as much money as possible to keep people in another.

          7. Bob

            As a matter of money having a bunch of LTC’s, Majors, and Captains as worker bees is significantly more expensive. Those positions are originally supposed to be more like 1 in 100, 500 or more as they are leadership positions.

            Not that the Army’s Warrant system is great because you have basically all the flight experts lead by one of the least experienced officers.

          8. My relative – at Midway he was an E-5…

            DUNN, JACK DEVORE
            Citation:
            The President of the United States takes pleasure in presenting the Distinguished Service Cross to Jack DeVore Dunn, Sergeant, U.S. Army Air Forces, for extraordinary heroism in connection with military operations against an armed enemy while serving as Aerial Engineer and Gunner on a B-26 Medium Bomber of the 18th Reconnaissance Squadron, 22d Bombardment Group (M), FAR EAST Air Force (Detached), in aerial action against enemy surface forces on 4 June 1942, during an engagement near Midway Island. Sergeant Dunn participated in an extremely hazardous and difficult torpedo-bombing mission against the Japanese Navy. He displayed extraordinary heroism throughout the attack in fighting off many enemy fighters during and after the attack. By his skilled airmanship and courageousness he materially aided in the success of the first torpedo attack ever carried out by the Army Air Forces. The personal courage and devotion to duty displayed by Sergeant Dunn on this occasion have upheld the highest traditions of the military service and reflect great credit upon himself, the Far East Air Force, and the United States Army Air Forces.
            Headquarters: Hawaiian Department, U.S. Army, General Orders No. 117 (1942)

          9. He ended up flying as an E-8 co-pilot (?) or pilot (?)

          10. creech

            Ever seen a military band? Everyone is a Sgt. of some stripe (no pun). Aren’t there any super talented trumpet players who are still PFCs?

      2. thepasswordispassword

        I’ve heard this exact story except instead of it being Russians it was Arabs.

    5. Pan Zagloba

      IIRC Soviet doctrine was to keep most of the army divisions in incomplete state, so that (In theory) once mobilization is declared and regular soldiers arrived the unit could roll faster, as all the officers are up-to-speed and present.

      Part of the reason German invasion hit so hard in 1941 is that some of the units they ran over were still mobilizing, so they could get all the trained cadres (and this is post-purges, so already thinned out) and equipment easy enough.

      Military History Visualized recently did a video on state of Russian military that had some historical (post 1990) stuff in it.

    1. Q Continuum

      her*

      1. jesse.in.mb

        It’s misgendering all the way down!

      2. Stinky Wizzleteats

        Reacting to Wilson’s comments, Al Sharpton said, “Well, he’ll be tweeting about her few remarks. Now, if he is impeached, the vice president is from Indiana and he is more conservative than the president.”

        Al Sharpton, the voice of reason.

        1. Playa Manhattan

          So is Pelosi.

          It’s amazing.

          1. Hyperion

            The old guard are batshit crazy enough, but they ain’t commie enough for the new Democrat party.

      3. BakedPenguin

        You were thrown by the cowboy hat.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder

      She’s got that Maxine Waters vibe.

    3. Endless Mike

      What really bothers me about this woman is the cultural APPROPRIATION – no way she’s ever even been on a horse, let alone is a real cowgirl.

    4. Playa Manhattan

      Progressives have ruined Facebook, Twitter, the NFL, and now…. hats.

    5. antisthenes

      I guess there isn’t a 25th amendment for Congresspersons, is there?

    6. Gilmore

      Jesus Christ.

      the story there, as far as i’m concerned, isn’t the batshit lady in the hat, but rather a democrat party that can’t put a lid on its crazies.

      because, in my humble opinion, she’s not really helping anyone. I mean, if you want someone to be the poster child for Democrat criticism of Trump? oh, make it her. Because how many people in America are going to look at her, then look at him, and then say, “Yeah, she’s the more-credible one”. And that’s saying a lot, because trump is pretty full of shit to begin with. But at least he’s full of shit in a superficially appealing way. she’s just an embarrassment.

  22. Derpetologist

    mental sandbox time

    There are two priorities for military equipment:

    First, it must be rugged, because it’s going to get dropped, dragged through mud, etc. It also needs to be rugged to reduce the chance of it breaking. It is often hard to get spare parts and fix/replace things in the field.

    Secondly, it must be simple, because most of the people using it will have little or no training, and in the heat of battle, the more complicated it is, the less likely a stressed-out operator will use it correctly.

    Lower cost is nice, but should come at the expense of the above.

    I think optimizing performance is a mistake. I’d much rather have a rifle accurate to 300 m that almost never jams than one accurate to 400 m that jams if it gets dirty.

    1. Q Continuum

      The whole, “you could die if this doesn’t work properly” changes manufacturing and quality control. Kind of like building an airplane.

    2. Scruffy Nerfherder

      You forgot profitability for the manufacturing company that has three retired generals on its board.

      1. Derpetologist

        Well, it is my mental sandbox…

    3. thepasswordispassword

      Exactly. Practice with many magazine of cartridge to hit largest side of barn, then not worry about extra 100 meters distance.

    4. Bob

      In general the military is such an enormous bureaucracy that it’s nearly it’s own socialist state with all the trappings of misplaced incentives. They will never price or source equipment efficiently because they gain nothing by doing so.

      In general the state can’t run efficiently well and it never will. So if your going to say we need the government to run something you are accepting it will run inefficiently.

      I can accept that for certain things where there is essentially no civilian market but it drives me nuts when people want the government to run something like health care. The market exists for healthcare and there’s no way the government will run more efficiently when they have no incentive to do so.

  23. kinnath

    The wife just texted to say the permits to carry arrived in the mail. Time to polish the sword.

    1. Q Continuum

      Flog the bishop?

      1. Q Continuum

        Unleash the purple headed yogurt slinger?

        1. Q Continuum

          Run Drano through the plumbing?

          1. Q Continuum

            Buff the banana?

    2. Mad Scientist

      Can we assume that euphemism is exactly what we think it is?

      1. jesse.in.mb

        When you assume you make an ass out of U and kinnath

        1. Mad Scientist

          Hey, I requested permission to assume!

    3. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Plant the flag?

    4. Scruffy Nerfherder

      Holster the gun?

    5. kinnath

      The Iowa Permit to Carry Dangerous Weapons includes blades in excess of 5 inches, concealed or not concealed.

      1. kinnath

        But read whatever you want into that post — it is Friday.

        1. kinnath

          Off to drink Mead. Cheers!

          1. Off to drink Mead.

            Nerd!

            ::looks at collection of cartridge video games that haven’t been played in 15 years; slinks off::

          2. Playa Manhattan

            Which ones?

  24. Derpetologist

    POLL: Millennials would prefer to live in a socialist country

    A new survey reveals that more millennials would prefer to live under a socialist regime than a capitalist one, though only about 1/3 of respondents were able to successfully define the term “socialism.”
    Only 36%, meanwhile, expressed a “very unfavorable” view of communism, and most said they wouldn’t even be “insulted” to be called a communist.

    https://www.campusreform.org/?ID=10103

    ***
    More than four-in-ten U.S. millennials would prefer to live under socialism than capitalism, according to a new survey by the Victims of Communism Memorial Foundation.

    When given the choice to pick a preferred system of government, 44 percent of millennials responded that they would rather live in a socialist country while another seven percent opted for a communist state. Capitalism, on the other hand, was preferred by 42 percent of millennial respondents, with the remaining 14 percent split evenly between fascism and communism.
    ***

    The hardest thing is there’s always a new gullible generation willing to try a dumb idea. The only silver lining I see is that there are a lot of people who think socialism means “stuff I like, but better.”

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      That’s not cool.

    2. Viking1865

      Public schools, ladies and gentlemen. Public schools.

      1. jesse.in.mb

        Meh, they’re probably all thinking they’d be in a Sweden instead of a Venezuela.

        1. Hyperion

          Of course. “No dude, I’m talking about Denmark!”. /derp

      2. Derpetologist

        IMO, there only a few really important ideas that ought to be taught to everyone, and the public school system does a poor job of covering them. Which is impressive considering the amount of time and money they have for teaching it.

        I’m pretty sure a dozen maxims could cover the most important lessons:

        -You can’t get something for nothing
        -Don’t believe everything you hear or read
        -Practice makes perfect
        -If one thing doesn’t work, try something else
        -Ask questions

        The main benefit of school is being exposed to a variety of topics/activities so you can see what you’re interested in.

    3. Gilmore

      I would also prefer they lived in a socialist country. Preferably one with a very-robust slave-labor system.

      1. Chipwooder

        So you’ve been to school for a year or two, and you know you’ve seen it all….

    4. antisthenes

      I wonder if the Norks would take slaves in tribute in exchange for walking back their nuclear ambitions for a while?

      1. Gustave Lytton

        I think they’d prefer rice and grain vs more mouths to (not) feed.

    5. Hyperion

      Public education. They’ve been taught for at least 12 years, and beyond if they attended college, that socialism is some warm and fuzzy shit were everyone is happy and everything is free. Indoctrination really works if you start them young enough. Which is why Obama was always pushing pre-kindergarten. Gotta get them little brains pliant early on. I bet he’d like the idea of playing some Mao speeches to fetuses.

    6. Derpetologist

      I’ve posted this before, but it merits a re-run:

      It’s a Wonderful Life (with capitalism)

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwH3Xr6uyG0

      1. Derpetologist

        comment gold:

        ***
        Thats exactly how life looked like in the commusm period in Poland, it always makes me wonder how western european idiots tend to act like if socialism/communism is a good thing, while they have not idea how life used to be like under it. And before any leftie say’s boo hoo, communism did not failed its the people who failed. Think for yourself, how is that in every single communist/socialist country the same scenario happened independetly from each other. And for those who says that its still worth to give it another shot, let me quote Albert Einstein “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”.
        ***

      2. Q Continuum

        BUT MUH SKANDUHNAYVEEYUH!!

  25. Hyperion

    “Global Warming — good for the Ozone Hole. And crops, and not freezing to death.”

    I bet those dudes in Europe during the Younger Dryas were really pining for some global warming.

    1. Hyperion

      Who among us hasn’t already thought this?

    1. Hyperion

      Look, man, we can only afford so many coloring books and puppies. What do you want, a government shutdown?

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        …yes?

  26. Spartan Dad

    Day 4 of renovations complete. Almost there. Need 1 more day for a second coat of paint, molding on the baseboards, and to reskim some of the drywall.

    We’ll see what the wife says when she sees it after work today with the flooring down and 1st coat of paint on. It’s definitely not a professional job. It’s pretty close though, better than I could do, and the redneck handymen I used cost about 15 or 20% of what it would cost for a licensed contractor. Not bad considering the ceiling and parts of the wall and floors had to be ripped out and replaced in both rooms.

    1. Gustave Lytton

      Nice! If she’s like my wife, she’ll be thrilled that it’s much better than it was.

      1. Spartan Dad

        I hope so. I think she will like it. I get hung up on the imperfections, but it looks so much better overall.

        1. Gustave Lytton

          Sounds like me. I replaced several board & restained the front walk for the first time a couple weeks back. All I could see was what I should have done better but the missus was supremely happy with it.

    2. Playa Manhattan

      The biggest time sink is if you’re skimcoating the walls smooth. That’s 3 days or more.

      Just texture with orange peel.

      1. Spartan Dad

        The walls look pretty good. These guys used to be painters so they can do some painting.

        The mud and tape where the sheet rocks joins needs some work though. Very visible through the first coat of paint. They are going to go back through with finishing compound to blend it a bit more.

  27. Hyperion

    So I’ve been pondering this sudden epidemic of accusations against pretty much everyone who’s anyone. Eventually they will run out of the rich and famous and this will start moving down the food chain. And of course that has already been happening for years in academia.

    The eventual outcome of this, if it continues, is that people will completely disassociate with each other until finally, no humans will ever make direct contact with each other, except on the internet. This has terrifying implications because when everyone is finally that divided, the PC thugs will have won and will be able to implement the sort of complete control over society that they want. I’m looking now to get into building sexbots, because those will be the new overlord trillionaires. Everyone else will live in small cubicles in mega cities with only their sexbot and the internet to enjoy.

    1. thepasswordispassword

      You don’t want to live in The City With No People?

    2. mexican sharpshooter

      I have $100 to invest in Hyperion Sexbot Co.–cash. Tell me where to send it….

    3. All those professors that got sweet student poontang. They’re next.

      1. Hyperion

        Yeah. They’ve been pretty much untouchable. But their monster shall eat them next.

    4. Q Continuum

      They’re the new puritans. Pretty soon it will be chaperoned dates and arranged marriages again.

      1. Hyperion

        Isn’t that the conservative ethics that they’re so opposed to? But yeah, you’re right.

  28. RAHeinlein

    Any Glibs who studied Financial Engineering or Actuarial Science?

    1. jesse.in.mb

      Financial Engineering

      Only by injection…so no.

      1. Q Continuum

        So you can’t breed financial sense into someone? Interesting…

    2. Playa Manhattan

      What a mysterious question. Go on…

    3. My niece is an actuary, but not a Glib.

    4. RAHeinlein

      My son is a first-year Engineering Science student at a small, private college. We have “pushed” Financial Engineer as a goal – he is aligned. His college has a very strong Actuarial Science program and are “pushing” a move to Actuarial Science as a better pathway to Financial Engineering. I don’t have experience with Actuarial Science so am interested-in perspectives.

      From an internship perspective, I can “sell” Engineering Science to a broad base (particularly our clients since he has also completed AIB training), but I am unclear about Actuarial Science other than insurance industry.

      1. DId you major in Scare Quoting?

        I KID! I KID!

    1. jesse.in.mb

      Those are quite a bat mitzvah gift.

      1. Q Continuum

        I wish she had been my bar mitzvah gift. Who needs savings bonds?

  29. Q Continuum

    Decent article about the Dems’ coalition problems.

    http://freebeacon.com/columns/class-realignment-broke-democrats/

    1. Hyperion

      “the Democratic Party that has been most disrupted by the realignment of American politics along class lines. Not that the Democrats, or Washingtonians in general, seem aware of this fact.”

      Well, when you’re living in Panem, you don’t really notice.

  30. Derpetologist

    I have no words for this

    ***
    Today, there are millions who are ambivalent between the politics of inclusion and the politics of exclusion — not quite woke, not quite hateful.
    Men unprepared by their upbringing to know their place in an equal world. White people unready for a new day in which Americanness no longer means whiteness. People anxious about change’s pace, about the death of certainties.

    When we accept these duties, we may begin to notice the ways in which our very different pains rhyme. The African-American retiree in Brooklyn who fears gentrification is whitening her borough beyond recognition probably votes differently from the white foreman in Arizona who fears immigration is browning his state. Yet their worries echo.
    ***

    1. Q Continuum

      It bears repeating: it must be hell inside these people’s heads.

    2. Hyperion

      “The woke illusion tells us to circle the wagons. But real change is missionary, seeking to expand the circle.”

      “an evangelism of love”

      I mean, there’s no way that’s just meaningless bullshit.

  31. KibbledKristen

    Fuckin longest week of my life. Having a Shed Mountain Ale (DOOM will appreciate that)

    1. DOOMco

      Delicious!!

  32. Dammit – I post at 6 AM and I still can’t get any replies before the morning links 🙁

    Anyhoo, Swiss – any thoughts on this http://www.military.com/daily-news/2017/11/03/resigned-uss-cole-case-lawyers-defy-war-court-judge-order-again.html ?

    I read another article this morning – can’t remember the reference – where the Air Force Capt who was the only remaining counsel for Nashiri was saying that he couldn’t defend him because he wasn’t a qualified Death Sentence lawyer.

    That seemed really weird – because unless things have changed since the last John Grisham novel I read – can’t any appropriately licensed lawyer (ie. bar qualified in a state) work a death penalty case? There’s no additional “Certification” for that is there?

    Suppose it’s possible that a military tribunal would be different – but we’re still not talking UCMJ or anything else. Just seemed really bizarre.

    1. States started moving that way some years back – IL had certified capital defense lawyers before the death penalty got dumped. I am quite sure this bastardized Fed …thing might have similar requirements. God knows some JAG CPT ain’t gonna be qualified.

      1. Interesting – hadn’t heard anything about “extra” certifications beyond the bar. Still thinking about “A Time to Kill”, etc. Ie. junior joker straight out school picking up some crazy pro bono case.

  33. mexican sharpshooter

    So what beer do you all want me to review?

    1. Hamm’s. Because I have a case of it I’m afraid to start drinking for fear that I wasted $16.

      1. mexican sharpshooter

        Too late.

      2. mexican sharpshooter

        I’ll look for it next time.

      3. Gustave Lytton

        Cans? Make beer can chicken.

        1. Playa Manhattan

          Aluminum and paint are delicious.

          1. *swills red wine, narrows gaze*

        2. gbob

          Some of us like it in the can.

    2. gbob

      Well, this is a homer pitch from me, but if you can get it, Southernteer 2X IPA

      Good stuff.

      1. Sean

        Good, yes. A little on the sweet side.

        1. gbob

          The sweetness makes it dangerous. Too many summer nights enjoying a cold, sweet drink. Or three. Or six. Or twelve.

      2. mexican sharpshooter

        You’ll see a Southern Tier soon.

    3. Sean

      Dogfish Head Indian Brown Ale might be a good one.

    4. MOAR STOUTS AND PORTERS! Its getting cold, and all I drink is that kind of stuff through the winter. Start doing Kolsch and such in Spring. 🙂

      1. mexican sharpshooter

        The editing staff will see Stouts Part 3 next week…

    5. Eenie meenie miney moe. That one.

  34. Gilmore

    I can barely figure out WTF actually happened, through all the PC-gender-talk terminology.

    best i can tell its, “trans-teen gave blowjobs to a pair of wannabe-rapper-thug, who learned the person sucking cocks was a boy, and who then shot them”

    is that a hate-crime?

    it also occurs to me… that if someone misrepresenting their gender engaged in sex acts on someone, that the otherwise-willing person discovered it after the fact…? could they claim ‘rape’? something something ‘under false pretenses’?

    it seems to me that the law has no clear provisions for describing something as participant in a ‘unwilling sex act’ due to a misrepresentation of gender. basically, if a tranny tricks you into having sex, its not a crime, because what you believed doesn’t matter.

    1. It’s a crime. There’s no such thing as a hate crime.

      Try him for ADW or attempted murder and lock him up for as long as possible. But end this hate crime bullshit. It’s a slippery slope we shouldn’t be on.

    2. jesse.in.mb

      At trial this week, prosecutors said Johnson was wearing a pink headband and hair extensions when Sanders-Galvez and his cousin saw the teen at a store, followed Johnson in their car, then took the teen to a Burlington home.

      Considering the article describes the 16 year old kid as gender non-conforming rather than as a passable MTF, and considering the cousins seem to have aggressively courted Johnson, I’m guessing buyer’s remorse rather than outright misrepresentation.

      1. ArchieBunker

        It’s like buying a snickers ice cream bar and then realizing it’s a frozen regular snickers bar as you take the first rock-hard bite

  35. To playa, Jesse, and anyone else: cha siu hanging from oven rack method and pork butt and the “deem sum” book marinade recipe; 2 days marinade. Those drapery hooks rule. I’m going to get a silicone rubber glove to make rotating during basting much quicker. Photos out of sequence.

    ? A+ recipe approval from my Hongkonger wife.

      叉燒飯

    1. Playa Manhattan

      Nice work, son. Nice work.

    2. Playa Manhattan

      And… how did it taste?

      Yeah, gotta get a BBQ glove. Get one that goes all the way up to the elbow. I learned that, much like every thing else, the painfully hard way.

      1. jesse.in.mb

        I’ve got a bunch of scabbing on the back of my hand from putting something in the oven the other day. Sad!

      2. The taste was very good. If I’ve got the endorsement of a homesick Hongkonger, I can confidently recommend. Doesn’t mean it’s better than Lee Kum Lee necessarily, but even with LKK, we tend to use their as a sauce products as a baseline to tweak. Only thing i would change is add a bit more 5-spice.

        1. Playa Manhattan

          I have the same complaint about Noh. I always add my own five spice, plus Sichuan pepper, because whatever is in the five spice is obviously fake.

    3. Playa Manhattan

      Are you brushing that with honey, or just the drippings?

      1. The photo recipe I shot which you bookmarked recommended a baste of 3:1:0.4 of honey:soy sauce:sesame oil. It’s a baste. The catch pan is merely filled with water to prevent obnoxious smoke from drippings.

      2. Also I neglected to mention that I used palm sugar, and about 20% of the soy sauce was maggi.

  36. KibbledKristen

    This is giving me a happy. THe beer is giving me a acid reflux.

    1. gbob

      Used to live in Steamboat, Colorado. I still miss the slopes.

      I say we all found our own Glib ski mountain town. Lots of bars, no laws, no taxes, no roads, a woochipper in every house, and plenty of spooky woods for eight feel primates to rape us.

      1. Playa Manhattan

        All of the good mountains are already in National Forests or whatever.

        Oh… I get it. Move to Greenland.

      2. KibbledKristen

        I’m in!

    2. Playa Manhattan

      Mammoth opens in a week. It just closed.
      The Minarets.

      1. KibbledKristen

        Looks like it’s shaping up to be another great winter for CA!

    3. I can’t drink a lot of beer for that reason. I blow up like Violet Beauregarde.

  37. Derpetologist

    amusing

    ***
    Pochtovy (Russian: Почтовый) was a submarine built for the Imperial Russian Navy. The boat was designed by Drzewiecki and built at the Metal Works St Petersburg in 1908. She was funded by Public subscription.[1]

    This ship’s machinery was a novel attempt at Air Independent Propulsion (AIP) using gasoline engines with air supplied by pressurised cylinders. Forty-five cylinders containing 350 cubic feet (9.9 m3) of air at 2500 psi could give the boat a 28-nautical-mile (52 km) submerged range on one engine. The exhaust gasses were vented via perforated pipe under the keel. The system proved reliable in trials but condensation problems and the tell-tale wake produced by the exhaust resulted in no further development and the boat was stricken in 1913
    ***

    “Huh, I wonder where those bubbles are coming from…”

    1. Mad Scientist

      SEA SMITH LEAVE TRAIL OF HAPPY BUBBLES ON WAY TO RAPE.

      1. *Furious applause, until hands bruise*


        SEA SMITH?

        1. KibbledKristen

          Loch Smith! OMG! I’m amazing!

          1. KibbledKristen

            If this doesn’t get a narrowed gaze….

  38. Hyperion

    Oh yeah, we believe you this time

    Politico is the biggest pile of shit on the internet. They must hold the undisputed record for every thing they have ever published being wrong. How the hell does this douche rag still exist?

    1. Do you not Airport CNN bro?

  39. Festus

    OT – Finally stood up to the Bitch Queen of New Orleans and told her in no uncertain terms that I do not replace tubes over 10′ from the ground. Expect much teeth-gnashing and garment rending. She’s gonna have me in her sights until someone else wanders through like a retarded whitetail. Fuck that shit! Contract says ten feet, ten feet it be.

    1. Yusef drives a Kia

      what are these tubes you speak of? are they intertubes?

      1. Festus

        The florescent ones that you swing about. “Zwoom! Zwoooom!”

    2. Fallopians hardest hit.

      1. Festus

        I’d imagine her tubes are barren and full of bitter vetch.

  40. Michael

    I’ve been intermittently listening to the audio from the Tesla earnings call. Holy shit, is this painful.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MGazS-1KRB0

    I wonder if some of the shareholders are hanging in there just to see how far Musk will take this bullshit.

    1. KibbledKristen

      Here’s a fun headline from the Sac Bee. Yeah, I’d love to get paid not to produce anything, too. (disclaimer, I did not RTFA)

      Tesla is a great place to work

      1. Festus

        I remember working as a grunt in a coupla places and every time you’d see the white hard-hats show up it was the kiss of death. Government helping, factory shuttering. Shiny hats have come to watch you fail.

  41. KibbledKristen

    TOS video. I’d say their video content is far outstripping the written.

  42. Festus

    “Hell, I’ll jump on the pile!”

  43. Left Hand of Radar

    LAST! Can I call last? I don’t know because I didn’t comment on the links. Maybe I own Tesla stock? It could be in my 401K. Who knows? Here’s a song from some friends of mine who I used to open for on tour. Enjoy:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ktf-Y3pg60&list=PLYy0GODLmew1TqDHjdx18ENTeucDXZY5a

    1. Festus

      Not last! I am the threadkiller. Bow before your lessors!

      1. Tundra

        Nope.

        1. DOOMco

          You wish, Tundra.

          1. Tundra

            Easy, youngster.

            When are you moving?

          2. DOOMco

            Dad lands Monday morning, should be out that night. maybe tuesday AM.

          3. Tundra

            What’s the plan with Bridger?

          4. DOOMco

            I’ll take photos. We are towing it home.
            My first project is to build an outpost for the tractor so the truck can park in the garage.

          5. Tundra

            Perfect subject for MU!

          6. DOOMco

            it should be a fun journey. It’ll probably be 3 nights on the road. It’s about 35-40 hours, a little longer at the speeds we will need to go.

          7. Tundra

            I’m jealous. I hope you guys have a great time!

  44. hayeksplosives

    National Geographic Channel is currently airing a doc based on the amatuer videos of the JFK assassination (Zapruder and a couple of others). The new part is that the films have been scanned at HD and “restored.” I have never seen the films look this clear.

    Even though they are addressing the conspiracy theories, they are mostly dismissing them by showing new details.

    1. Festus

      I’d like to know what the fuck happened in Vegas or maybe that’s just me. I could give a shit about JFK (he was murdered a few months before I was seeded).

      1. hayeksplosives

        The Vegas thing has been handled so strangely that I will be highly skeptical of whatever “official” explanation is offered.

        What is weirder is the lack of media clamoring for more information faster.

        1. Festus

          Where is the media freak-out? Nearly sixty people shot down in cold blood and now it’s “Russia, Russia, Russia” again.

      2. Festus

        I was sparked on the night that the Beatles played Ed Sullivan. I’ve done the math and my Mom was crazy for Paul.

        1. hayeksplosives

          That’s the kind of information I NEVER try to work out regarding my sweet ol’ parents.

          1. Festus

            My brother was a New Year’s Eve baby and Mom was a sucker for big brown eyes. She was 14 when she got knocked up with bro and 15 when I swam the channel.

          2. hayeksplosives

            Awesome. I have an older brother and sister.

            I was the product of an IUD failure; that’s as much detail as I care to know!