The Query
I’m a single guy who’s finding the search for a girlfriend frustrating, because one of my absolute requirements for any woman I date that she be at least libertarian-leaning. I have friends of different political persuasions, of course, because politics aren’t the crux of our friendship, so we do [shared interest activity] then part ways. But I don’t think I could stand coming home to someone who supposed to be a source of solace and moral support yet I think is at best naïve and at worst stupid or immoral or both. How could I connect with someone who doesn’t even understand my frustrations with the world outside the walls of our home? How could I respect as an equal someone who thinks such a world is moral or just?
So, for those of you who are dating/married to non-libertarians, how do you make peace with that? Am I doing myself a disservice by maintaining such a strict requirement?
— Where The Libertarian Women At?
The Answer(s)
Riven:
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with waiting until you find the right person. Previously, I was married to someone who might have considered himself a libertarian, but he definitely fell into a standard Republican square, in my estimation. Things didn’t work out–for plenty of reasons, not just because we couldn’t see eye-to-eye ideologically. One thing I’ve found about libertarians and libertarianism is that it isn’t just a political philosophy; for me, it’s more of a life philosophy. I would not be able to push my ideals aside for my romantic partner and I have a whole failed relationship to prove it. As you said above, how could I come home to someone who has an entirely different approach/reaction to the world than I do? I couldn’t. Mr. Riven and I met on OKCupid, where it was easy to see on each other’s profiles if there was going to be any compatibility or not. Luckily we were both painfully honest, and meeting in person only reinforced that compatibility further. The rest, they say, is history. Hold out for that unicorn.
Banjos:
A thrice divorced hopelessly romantic former coworker of mine once told me a story. He was almost about to give up on finding “the one” when a friend of his point blank asked him a question. “What do all the women you have been married to/dated over your life have in common?” He thought about it for a second and then said “I met them all in bars.” His friend then said “If you want to catch a different kind of fish, you need to start fishing in different ponds.” My coworker took his friend’s advice to heart, found a different pond, and has been happily married ever since. Shortly after being told that story, I started fishing on Reason and caught myself a sloopy. I know of another couple who are soon to be married who found each other through Reason’s comment section, as well. So my simple advice is this: If you want a libertarian fish, fish in libertarian ponds.
BrettL:
First of all, we know there are no libertarian women out there, Banjos and Riven are taken. But beating our heads against the wall of impossible is obviously attractive to the libertarian leaning. What worked well for me was to find one who didn’t care at all about politics and really didn’t think much about how society should be ordered. And then show her the outrageous things that happen every day that this site and certain others are good at highlighting. Mrs. L still doesn’t care about politics, per se, but she sure does say a lot of things that sound like they came off this message board in response to the petty statism we encounter day-to-day. However, Mrs. L is awesome, sane, and puts up with me, so good luck finding your own unicorn.
If you’ve got questions and no answers, feel free to drop us a line at advice@glibertarians.com, and we will do our best to help you.
Penicillin will fix that.
I’m thinking it’ll take direct application of a silver nitrate solution and cryotherapy
Personal question: when you guys “do it,” what does she do with the dog and the white cane?
He holds them for her and films. Cuck joke. Too soon?
Conclusion = there are hot women in ponds
(goes to Walmart to get waders)
Hot women. With swords
It’s dangerous to go alone. Take this.
Listen. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.
I mean, if I went ’round saying I was an emperor just because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they’d put me away!
The term “game-warden” takes on new meaning. Hate the player, warden, not the game
You’re awesome Riven.
No, you!
Mutual respect for each other is more important than total agreement. That goes both ways.
You’ll find more of that among conservative-leaning women than progs. That widens the pool of possible choices.
I don’t agree with my wife on everything, but we are a united front.
I got my wife to build this website, despite her disgust with our ideas about humor.
How dare she hate the comedic excellence that is STEVE SMITH.
I’m guessing she is more disgusted by our love of SugarFree’s prose, but I could be wrong.
She generally doesn’t care for it, but she appreciates that it’s great writing.
I’m impressed.
I’ve generally found that no one outside of this website appreciates my sense of humor.
Unless your partner is an avowed communist (and even then), I just don’t see politics as that big of a factor in a relationship. My fiancee is apolitical, at best, but even when she has a firm stance that I disagree with it has never gotten beyond a civil discussion.
*shoulder shrug* Focus on other things??
I tend to find religion is a bigger deal breaker than politics, but I haven’t dated anyone who’s extremely ideological.
Yup. I worked with a woman who was very religious, and although we were into each other, my lack of belief was a deal breaker.
Been there…
This was a big sticking point with “the cowboy” and I.
Did you know that oral is strictly forbidden, according to the Bible, according to him?
Was it one of those “it’s only forbidden if I do it to you, not the other way around” deals? Because I have to respect that level of commitment to a con attempt. If not, then I’m just shaking my head at that poor guy
That would have made consistent sense; he was sort of a hypocrite like that. (Alcohol is ok, ganja not so much; weird piercings not ok, ear-lobe piercings only are just fine; etc.)
But no. Did not want to receive, either. Something something oral sodomy?
I guess I respect the determination it takes to turn down a blow job??? I mean not really, but kinda. Given that this is Montana, I’m flatly contending he’s a Hutterite. Which makes the story funnier for me
Lol! That’s great.
I mean, generally Hutes only marry other Hutes–if they marry outside the Hutes they get kicked out of the clan. But he might have fit in there.
“I mean, generally Hutes only marry other Hutes–if they marry outside the Hutes they get kicked out of the clan.”
This applies for people living between Valley and Sheridan counties of any religion IIRC
I like the idea of God going through a list of activities and just vaguely approving or disapproving of them.
“Booze? Meh, it’s fine. Pot? Only twice a week. Blowjobs? I DRAW THE LINE HERE, NO FURTHER.”
Wait, so anal wasn’t cool either? How did you survive in that relationship?
Well, I didn’t. Lol. But yeah, there was a lot of–Cowboy says X, Riven says what about XYZ? Cowboy insists X is the way, Riven points out inconsistencies. Eventually, Cowboy says, “Jeeze. Do you always think you’re right?”
Riven, “Obviously. If I thought I was wrong, I’d think something else. What kind of question is that?”
What a happy home it was.
I only wish I knew then what I know now; would have saved both of us some heartache–and me a boatload of cash.
OK. You’re not Friday. You’re Dagny Taggart in a dominatrix getup.
“Jeeze. Do you always think you’re right?”
ABORT COWBOY, ABORT, YOU’RE STEERING INTO THE SUN.
I once got an alarm clock thrown at my head for telling an ex to calm down. I never made the same mistake again, and now I use a calm, soothing voice like one would with a cornered tiger.
Yeah, that’s pretty Dagny Taggart, half the book is “why can’t you be a well behaved woman?”
“Fuck you I do what I want.”
John. You definitely need to watch that link I posted downthread
As I’ve gotten older, this has become my mantra more and more often.
I can handle that; although, I like to think I’m a little more nuanced than a fictional character.
For instance, I could probably live the rest of my life without hearing another Rush song. This is apparently a character flaw of mine. 😛
The Rush aversion is a gender thing.
My wife was good friends with a number of Rush fans before she ever met me. She used to call Rush gigs “Sausagefestivities”, and when she learned I was a fan of the old (pre-90’s) stuff, that was almost that.
Fortunately, Yes, Ramones and shredders in general saved the day,
It’s a flaw of your sex, not you. It’s a running joke that there’s no female Rush fans. Maybe Geddy Lee’s voice triggers some impulsive primitive part of the female brain.
“We are the priests of the Temple of Sausage links” ♫♪♪
In Swissy’s absence …
*narrows gaze*
Puddy: Sorry, thou shalt not steal.
Elaine: Oh, but it’s okay for me?
Puddy: What do you care, you know where you’re going.
This is the second time you’ve used this phrase, and I love it.
“according to the Bible, according to him”
you can counter such arguments by pointing out to the teetotalers that Jesus is quoted in the Bible as saying that it it not what goes into a man that defiles him it is what comes out of his mouth (kinda paraphrased).
The rules about alcohol and such tend to be denominational and man made in origin not Biblical.
Religions are just God’s ponds, yo. And I got one tip for you = Snake-Handlers.
I am right now sitting in a restaurant in a town where that stuff no-shit happens. One local guy even appeared on one of those reality shows on the topic.
That said, we have some beautiful local gals.
Mrs. 6 is a devout came-back-to-Jesus-in-later-life Catholic. I’m probably best described as an agnostic. The religion stuff doesn’t come up, because I suspect she hopes I’ll have some kind of deathbed conversion, but really, that’s the only area that’s off limits.
Politically, she grew up in a Scoop Jackson Democrat environment in NY, but wasn’t particularly politically engaged, and that was good enough for an English guy who met her at a point where he was coming to terms with having lived all over the world, with a visceral dislike of Thatcher, who suddenly realized that he had no legitimate criticism of most of what she had done as PM on the economic front.
It’s more an issue of *values* than politics, if the distinction makes any sense to you. 20 years on, she’s somewhat libertarian culturally – she still reflexively thinks there ougtta be a law – but in raw politics, she’s a pretty solid practical minarchist. I have to say though – in part – this is a generational issue. I have lots of sympathy for younger guys flirting with the MGTOW mindset, it’s a totally rational viewpoint when you look at young women as a group today.
Just let your eyes wander down?
That’s because you aren’t thinking about how it would go.
Lets say that her politics don’t bother you. You don’t agree with them but you tolerate them. Then she reads on facebook about the outrage of Betsy DeVos being appointed Secretary of education and her secret plan to force everyone to go to a school for Christian Religious indoctrination and she not only reposts that bullshit on her wall but she forwards it to yours too. Then one of your libertarian friends gently suggests that she is being a tad hyperbolic about the situation, backs it up with a reasoned argument for why DeVos isn’t that bad with sourced links and everything.
What do you think her reaction to your not defending her is going to be?
The facebook thing I made up but I am not kidding you, my wife did not talk to me and seriously questioned whether our marriage was salvagable when I told her that I rather liked the DeVos pick and my wife had always been apolitical with general libertarian leanings until a couple of years ago. I also have had to threaten her with divorce after she tried to shut down a discussion with accusing me of mansplaining.
Social Justice progressivism is a disease and as long as both parties can avoid contracting it differing political outlooks can work in a marriage, the problem is with outlets like Facebook being so prevalent it is getting harder and harder to avoid being forced into becoming a SJW or Anti-SJW your self.
That should read…
“The facebook thing I made up but I am not kidding you, my wife did not talk to me for a week”
So no punishment?
A week of golden silence.
My apologies on the SJW infection. My girlfriend had a different reaction to the DeVos doom and gloom on her Facebook, she asked me what was so horrible about the pick. So I went through the concept of backpack funding, school choice, and charter schools. At the end of the conversation, the girlfriend was now a fan of the DeVos pick.
The real stumbling block is the licensing laws. The girlfriend has a cosmetology license for the state, and the several times I’ve tried to bring up the ridiculousness of needing to be certified by the state to have a job… it has not gone well for me.
Sure. but that goes back to “religion is a deal-breaker, moreso than politics”. People can be civil about political differences, because they recognize that most politicians are scumbags, most policies have pros and cons, and so on. Social justice is more of a religion that happens to also be a political ideology. Not the only one, and of the other three that first come to mind, it’s murdered the fewest people, so there’s that.
Social Justice is a sect of Marxism. It’s a young denomination, but is not free from the traits that led to it’s parent faith being so very bloodsoaked.
So, for those of you who are dating/married to non-libertarians, how do you make peace with that?
I just go back and pick up cavewomen hookers. They’re very welcoming after they realize you’re not going to smack them over the head and drag them back to your cave.
I started fishing on Reason and caught myself a sloopy.
These euphemisms…
I know of another couple who are soon to be married who found each other through Reason’s comment section, as well.
Is that Grand Moff and kibby or whatever her name was? Whatever happened to her anyway?
Yas. They’re still together and getting married this summer. She just has a real-grown-up job, so she doesn’t get to play much
Nice. IS GMSM around here?
I think they’re both pretty busy getting ready for the wedding. GMSM is one of those rare soon-to-be-husbands who is actually involved in the planning.
I “assisted” in the planning. When my wife asked me what I wanted as part of the ceremony I told her I just needed her to be there. Seemed to go pretty smoothly after that.
Ha. Same. I said I’d help her with whatever, but promised I’d show up relatively sober and in a tux.
I tasted the menu and ate some cake. The least I could do.
Oh yeah. I sampled 5+ desserts.
When I did the menu tasting, I knew I wanted the beef Wellington, so I had them bring it to me 3 times.
I know what chicken and fish taste like, and I don’t care.
I probably did something else too.
*Thinks really hard*
Met with the DJ maybe?
When my wife asked me what I wanted as part of the ceremony
I told her I was delegating that to her.
j/k. I’m not a complete idiot.
My wife is fairly non-political. She gets pissed at how much we pay in taxes and the stupid shit politicians spend it on – I guess that makes her libertarianish.
My problem at work right now is that I just moved from a department full of men to one where I am the only man. They are all smart enough ladies, but they do often talk about things like diversity in our staff meetings. When I here some of those leftist holy words, my brain instinctively filters out their inane chatter. Several times I have regained consciousness only to realize a question has been asked and I have no idea what it was – or even what they were talking about.
How do I force myself to follow a conversation of a bunch of middle-aged women?
Imagine them wearing Victorian-era dresses with their hair done up in a bun.
Think of a “secret word” that one of them might say. Award points to any woman that says the secret word. At the end of the meeting, let the one with the most points know that she won.
If I knew how to do that, I wouldn’t be in a male-dominated industry. Sorry, Drake. There’s nothing in the world that makes a conversation between a bunch of middle-aged women at work interesting. My best suggestion would be some low-priced, sweet wine, like a moscato. Bitches love moscatos.
Wouldn’t that make their conversation even more inane?
Well, yes. But the topic usually changes to Chips or Magic Mike or something instead of “promoting diversity in the workplace.” So. Take your pick!
We sometimes host margerita and nachos nights for my wife’s circle of friends and I get to act as waiter.
Dear Bog, but 10 mins after I serve the 2nd round, the IQ drops to 50. The wiser ones slow down at that point, the crazy ones start behaving like they’re on Spring Break. And it never gets more intelligent.
Drunken guys CAN be funny, deze bitches, dey be crazy.
It’s the waterworks that get me. Sure, I get bummed out around the end of the night when I realize I’ve had a bit much and settle into that end-of-night stocktaking melancholy. But I don’t start sobbing on someone’s shoulder like my exes or my SIL. What the hell is that? You were having the time of your life ten minutes ago! Drink a glass of water and pull up the comforter, you’re done.
You misunderstand the social function of it. They enjoy it. But it’s as incomprehensible to us as our fart/burp jokes are to them.
Occasionally, in an alternate universe you might find a woman who will bond with a guy over their shared ability to burp “Yankee Doodle Dandy” in perfect pitch, but it’s gonna be rare,
And then you start handing out the beads?
Quote Ron Swanson.
I like Andy. I’m surrounded by a lot of women in this department. And that includes the men.
When we met 14 years ago, my wife was a committed Democrat (of the old-style Rust Best union type, her dad being a longtime member of IBEW) who used to roll her eyes at my then-Republican opinions and snort that she couldn’t believe she was dating a Republican. Now, I’m mostly libertarian while she has become a 100% committed Trumpette. Life is funny that way. We still obsess over the same weird stuff, have similar interests, and can make each other laugh.
“nort that she couldn’t believe she was dating a Republican.”
One of my wife’s cousins, an enthusiastic Trump-supporter, couldn’t believe she was marrying a libertarian.
My wife is mostly libertarian.
My wife is slightly more Libertarian a few times per week…for 10-15 minutes. IYKWIM…AITYD!
+1 your choice of euphemism.
My wife and I made political journey to libertarianism together, with many discussions along the way. It helps that she has always been a hard-nosed “don’t tell me what to do” kind of person. And so am I.
You must have, uh, interesting romantic nights.
You couldn’t tell from his leather daddy gear?
“Explain spontaneous order to me again, honey.”
Oooh, that’s hot!
Do you slap her when she says that? Spank her?
I assume that’s when you tell her what to do.
now, now let’s not get carried away.
Just walk away. Just walk away.
Reminds me of a story from my travels. Some 20 years ago, at work in our break room, one girl was lamenting the fact that she hadn’t found a decent guy and that she wanted a nice, church-going type.
My buddy asked the question before I did: “So…have you been going to church?”
“No.”
“Well, you might try there!”
Did you know that oral is strictly forbidden, according to the Bible, according to him?
Whut? The guy’s got his own university just for god-botherers.
I once dated a girl that was a psychology graduate student with an undergraduate degree in ‘post-modern feminism’. Needless to say, our politics were not simpatico. But, if the person is kind and open-minded you’ll find that there is mutual agreement on the vast majority of issues.
I’m now married to a woman who is non-political, but has begun to lean more right in her politics (this often happens with women once they get married and especially after having children). We don’t have long drawn out political discussions, but she allows me to lecture (or gripe) about the issues of the day. She’s forceful, though, when she feels that I’m being wrong-headed.
Frankly, I think political opinions are less important than the morality of a person. Find yourself a woman with a strong moral compass and you’ll be set.
‘psychology graduate student’
Ding ding ding
Unless she is morally opposed to Oral – see upthread.
But women are crucibles of sin, mostly incapable of opposing their urges.
One can only propose that she never got any that was any good.
How do I force myself to follow a conversation of a bunch of middle-aged women?
Learn to crochet.
Just try not to get stabbed.
What’s the difference in coding if they’re stabbed with a crochet hook versus stabbed with another implement while crochetting?
Depends, is a kayak involved?
The hook makes it harder to remove before you bleed out.
Most stab wounds bleed less when there’s an object obstructing the passage of blood out of the body. If it’s a single stab, you typically want to leave the object in place to reduce bleeding until you get the person to treatment.
I am changing your name to UnfunnyCivilServant.
It’s like you don’t pay attention – or read my articles.
*playing with crayon I stuck up my nose*
What was that?
When you work with hookers, you’re gonna get stabbed.
My experience is similar to Brett. My wife is not a libertarian, but when we met, I knew she was good people because she didn’t care about politics. She was interested in things like graduating from business school, buying rental properties, and the stock market. Also, cocktails, fine dining, and general “fuck it” attitude to adulthood.
We celebrated our 14th anniversary last week. As we’ve grown together, we have each graduated from business school. We have a healthy investment portfolio. We own multiple rental properties. We get to live like teenagers (but with money!). During this time, she has personally grown to see how the Government is an impediment to freely buying/selling assets. She is developing a healthy hatred for govt meddling in our financial and personal lives.
I guess my advice would be, look for a genuinely nice person. A person who has personal ambitions, and is motivated. A person who doesn’t even watch MSNBC, NPR, etc. A person who doesn’t need to be taken care of, or who has a sense of entitlement, or feels like they “deserve” a certain lifestyle. Find an independent person. You, as an independent person agree to join forces and work to create a better life through mutual support, respect, cooperation. Hell, that’s probably all love is anyway. Plus sex.
That sounds like my marriage, minus the sex.
That’s why God gave us two hands – so that we can switch them to get that Strange sensation every now and then.
You don’t know about the Howdy Stranger?
Sit on your hand until it falls asleep. Boom. Howdy, stranger.
See, this is why I keep coming back and reading comments. I did not know this.
This made me spill my coffee!
Good for you. I married a smart woman who likes me to take charge in many areas. She wants to manage our daily finances while I focus on long-term. She likes being a loving mother to our 2 boys and would do just about anything for them. I whisper in her ear that failing at a young age is fine, so is making mistakes. The proverbial “learning experiences” that provide wisdom. She occasionally listens to me on that.
I think the most important part, though, is the sex piece. At least for me. She entertains most of my whims, so I consider myself lucky as hell.
I couldn’t marry a racist. Or an Asian.
And whatever you do, do NOT undervalue loyalty. It matters and it will get you thru difficult times.
Yeah. Loyalty is a huge one.
I demand it of my wife, and all the strange I hook up with.
Look at Captain Kirk over here.
STFU, Sulu.
Fascinating.
Well said. That’s what a marriage ceremony is. It’s a loyalty oath.
I thought it was a non-compete agreement.
Other bitches didn’t agree to anything
You know who else made other people take loyalty oaths…
Riven?
Yeah, that’s been one of the big revelations for me: someone who is always, unequivocally on my side. We may discuss differences in private but not in public.
Damn right.
Mrs. Tundra is very apolitical, but a great mom and a warrior when the shit hits the fan. I’ll take that over my stupid political obsessions anytime.
I’m married to a lifelong Democrat that works for the state and has previously worked as a staffer for a Team Blue rep. We generally avoid politics – it’s the third rail of our marriage. There are many other much more pleasant things to enjoy in life and in each other.
Oh and exactly none of the daily war stories I hear after work each day have done anything to increase my confidence in government’s ability to do things affordably, competently, or equitably. Quite the opposite.
You are, indeed an American Hero then.
I’d be awfully tempted to fix things
No. When the Purges come, she’s going to be the one that gets me a special exemption and ensure that I only go to a re-education camp instead of the mass grave.
I don’t know why, but this reminds me; I just re-watched A Boy and His Dog, recently.
It holds up pretty well, I think. And you’ve gotta love a happy ending.
+1 Good Taste
“What do all the women you have been married to/dated over your life have in common?” He thought about it for a second and then said “I met them all in bars.”
*facepalm*
I waited a very long time. I had resigned myself to being single forever as I had been through one marriage and dated around a lot finding deal breakers with all of them. The right one came along. Stop making ‘getting married’ the goal and stick with ‘not getting stuck with the wrong one’. The right one will eventually show up. Just be patient. Also, dont look in bars.
I’ve heard that 70% of marriages here come from workplace romances. Used to be arranged marriages were common. Having some connections outside of just the two people can help you weather the tough times. Most people aren’t horrible and the social pressure to stay together helps you see that he/she isn’t horrible. A bar? That’s increasing the failure possibility by a mile.
I wondered whether arranged marriage websites are a thing after Kevin Williamson mentioned running loads of newspaper ads for same during his stint in the industry there. Annnnnd apparently they are.
According to Williamson, “homely” and “fair” were universal descriptors.
So much this. Unfortunately, it’s hard to get into this kind of mentality without having a divorce under your belt.
Thus spake the much-married woman ….
Having a kid to raise by yourself will do it too, no previous marriage required.
I just had an inspiration – a revelation indeed. I know who Riven reminds me of.
Heinlein’s Friday.
Take that complement for whatever you think it’s worth.
Heinlein anything is an insult.
Looks like I have to add this to my reading list. (Probably should have already been on my reading list…)
You *might* not value the complement.
*snickers* No oral? Really? If I had a date that had told me that I would have thanked her for the company, apologized for wasting her time, put down my fork and knife and walked away, paying the bill on the way out. That is just so wrong in so many ways. It is a blasphemy, a crime against humanity. What kind of monster….I shudder to think of it.
Once on a long road trip my wife bought me a bag of salted sunflower seeds to nibble on while I drove. After several hours of sucking the salt off of them, cracking them with my teeth and then using my tongue to pry open the shells the tip end of my tongue became quite irritated. It was out of commission for days. *tear rolls down cheek at the memory*
My wife pouted for the duration of our short vacation and forbade me to ever eat salted sunflower seeds again.
I’ve never considered cocksucker to be an insult. As far as I’m concerned, cocksuckers are doing God’s work.
Not getting, I’m fine with.
But if I can’t, you know, occasionally go in face-first, that’s a deal breaker.
That’s where I found mine – in a bar. Married 22+ years, 2 kids who appear to have their shit together.
One minor item: my wife rarely drinks.
I think politics matter to the extent that they reflect lifestyle choices. My wife isn’t particularly political, but tends to be conservative when politics hits her radar. She has become more libertarianish simply from my influence. I was/am a political junkie. I find the stuff fascinating, but have burned out over the past few years because the 24 hour crisis-mode of the partisans simply isn’t sustainable.
I couldn’t have married a prog, not because we wouldn’t have made it work, but because my personal views on how a household should be run are antithetical to progressivism. My theology is notably anti-progressive as well.
Regarding the “ways of love,” I’m a guy who didn’t really have many relationships. I had a number of dates and a number of month or two month relationships, but only really had two true relationships. Here’s what I found out. 1) Women can smell desperation a mile away. You need to change your mental state. You need to be happy with where you are, and a relationship would simply be the icing on the cake. 2) Figure out what’s important to you and date with those important things in mind. The ponds analogy is right. You ain’t gonna find “the right one” in the general population. You need to increase your odds by looking in places where people who value the things you value hang out. For me, that was church. 3) Decide what your end game is. If you’re looking to get married, then you should evaluate your (potential) relationship from that lens. If you want a few months of fun, your evaluation will change. I don’t know how many people I know who married their mistress and were then shocked to find out she was banging the pool boy. 4) Become the best person you can be. To go all superficial, I was about 50 lbs overweight for most of high school and got very little interest from women. I lost that weight before college and got much more interest.
Grrr. Wasn’t supposed to be a reply.
My wife classifies herself as a progressive democrat who is fiscally conservative. Her mother supported Hillary so ardently to the point of actually spending months knitting articles of clothing which were then mailed to Hillary’s campaign office. Her mother views failing to be a progressive democrat with the horror of a baptist being confronted with an inebriated catholic.
If my wife were political, we wouldn’t be married. Fortunately she isn’t. She’s also a libertarian at heart but doesn’t know it (although I’ll be sleeping with the turkeys in the woods behind our home should she ever read this). She works in insurance, and her burning contempt at the idiocy of the regulators occasionally erupts in a lovely denunciation over the dinner table that gladdens my black libertarian heart. And she denounces them not for ideological reasons but because she sees how they damage the industry, or its customers, and often both, and it pisses her off.
Here’s the thing. Libertarianism is actually the most humane and caring political philosophy out there. The caricature that we are harsh and uncaring is the product of projection on the part of totalitarians who wish to rule over our communities.
So… if they can’t tolerate you believing the things you believe, because they can’t recognize the goodness that animates it. They probably aren’t the right person for you.
And… if – like my wife – they are good people, who from their good intentions just happen to cast meaningless votes for monsters, you should be able to see pass over this minor defect.
None of us is perfect. None of the people we love are perfect. And the worst thing we can do is try to oppressively make those people perfect.
[attempts analogy, head-explodes]
It means she wants everyone else to be taxed into ruination to pay for the progressive agenda. But not Tarran’s family.
Amen. My wife is much more religious than I am, and a somewhat non-mainstream one at that. I treat her wishes on that with respect, don’t try to convert her, support her with the little stuff like taking her to services, and she does the same. It’s not my beliefs, but they are hers and I see what those mean to her.
As for politics, the missus was much more of a conventional old time Democrat, but with a strong leave me alone streak. As time has gone by, the leave me alone part has grown and she’s much more libertarianism, even if she wouldn’t use that to describe herself. She wanted to put a Ron Paul sign out in the front lawn when he was running. Quite a change from when we first met. She thought I was a racist for not supporting Affirmative Action programs. Now she mostly lets me gripe a little about the day’s idiocy before cutting me off. Not that she disagrees, but rather she doesn’t like the bitching.
I think Groovus and I have an answer.
I married foreign, and Russian at that. She came here because of, well, Russia. She was not a Libertarian per se but she could easily espouse all the L basics. Since she was leaving a socialist/communist country the obviousness of those failures stands out for her. Two bad points; while she agrees she doesn’t think it is that bad here and language. She says “I am a feminist” and I say “Not is the same sense as American chicks”. So once we got over a few of those hurdles we wuz all guud.
I find that most foreign women take a much more open view to politics in the US. American women seem often confused and angry about being a woman. My wife doesn’t understand that. Neither do I.
Ohh and don’t forget, boobs. Always boobs.
Ohh and don’t forget, boobs. Always boobs.
During one of his luls my buddy admitted to being interested in anything with “two tits, a hole, and a heartbeat.” When I pointed out that our mutual friend, a fairly hefty man, qualified, he amended: “and no facial hair.”
I had a mail order bride once. She was the best until she started to get all Westernized and uppity. I had to cut all cords in the house and put locks on all the doors.
is she now under concrete in the basement?
So i see the comment box now tells you *who* you’re replying to.
Bravo, webmaster-person moderator thing.
Also, i like the font change.
I know this isn’t germane to getting simpatico coochie for young libertarian studs, but do we have the equivalent of “unthreading” in Monocle?
The long threads take an eternity to scan thru’ when only a few branches of the thread are active
The long threads take an eternity to scan thru’ when only a few branches of the thread are active
The Monocle bar at the bottom has a “Show/Hide Old Threads” button.
You can also click the “X unread comments” in the bar, and it takes you to the next unread comment.
I realize now some of the style-changes here may have been me just updating NoScript; because the Other Site fonts seem to have changed as well. Regardless – i think Ariel is the most pleasing (or the least irritating) of fonts.
When I click on a story where the byline says Zardoz, I expect Zardoz, god damn it!
You know it’s just a puppet, right?
Shhhhhhh!
You’re a puppet!
And Santa Claus doesn’t exist, right? RIGHT? Way to ruin it for the kids here.
My wife hates that I like surf guitar. We get through it. Speaking of which, we should have surf music Fridays around here to liven things up.
“Surf Sunday” is more alliterative.
I’m not sitting at my desk on Sundays farting around on Glibs.
I’m about to embark on an epic day hike, but let me add Agent Orange https://youtu.be/gt544eJmyAc
And Allah La’s https://youtu.be/vd7GPAm7xYg
Have a good day y’all. Im heading to the beach.
Yes!
Man or Astroman Monday?
Posting from phone. Work just blocked this page, but only this page, for “executables.” The main page and the morning links are both still accessible.
And just as mysteriously, the block is lifted.
“Boss, workplace morale has double since Thicc Thursdays became a thing.”
Sounds like a squirrel infestation.
oh damn here’s where I realize I choose my handle unwisely because Mr Athena sounds stupid. If I’d chosen Hera, then he could be Zeus… no wait, that wouldn’t work either…
Anyway. My husband is definitely on the Dem side of things (because he’s in gov’t and this is Cali). But he’s not a raging progressive, is willing to talk and be informed about things, and is loyal and kind and all those wonderful things, so it works out. We met through a non-political mutual interest thing, and that also helped of course.
If I’d chosen Hera, then he could be Zeus…
He turns into swans and fucks random women?
yeah, that’s why it wouldn’t work. or at least not as far as I know….
Of course. all the hot bitches r in ponds
Go Roman, refer to him as Mr. Minerva. The alliteration sounds decent.
Runs fingertips lazily down outside of husband’s left bicep …
“You know, a lot of people confuse libertarians with libertines … but they’re not the same thing ….”
*gulp*
“It’s funny because guys who really *embrace* the idea of personal freedom kinda frazzles my emotions a bit and even I get a little bit confused *girlish giggle*”
*sound of sweat popping*
“Doesn’t the thought of freedom make you *excited*, if only a little bit ….?”
THIS WAS AN EXTRACT FROM THE NEW NOVEL, “MR. ATHENA DISCOVERS HAYEK AND BEGINS TO DOUBT THE EFFICACY OF PUBLIC CHOICE THEORY”, A NEW WORK FROM HOT TOPICS AN IMPRINT OF UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO PRESS.
Your…’methodology’ is precise…
So, for those of you who are dating/married to non-libertarians, how do you make peace with that? Am I doing myself a disservice by maintaining such a strict requirement?
I’ve been married for seven years to a woman who actually says things like “white privilege” and means it. But her real wheelhouse is environmentalism. And what I mean is that she works for an environmental nonprofit as a program director. I learned long ago to be very careful discussing politics with her. Mainly, the key is to avoid passionate areas of disagreement; it’s fine when it stays academic, but as soon as it starts to get a little heated, time to move on. It’s tricky. If most of our interactions had to do with politics, we’d probably not even be Facebook friends.
We met in a bar. I was there with a couple friends and one of them knew her from college, and we merged groups. We all went to my friend’s house, kept drinking, got in the hot tub, I noticed she had a nice rack, and next thing you know we’re out on a date. Turns out we like horror movies, have a similar sense of humor, like hanging out on a patio drinking margaritas and listening to old country music, stuff like that. Flash forward ten years and we’ve got a daughter who’s turning two in a couple of months, two dogs, two cats, a mortgage, the whole nine. We’ll probably never agree on the second amendment, or whether or not CAGW is a thing, but we agree on how to raise our daughter, and that Dan Snyder is a terrible person, and that generally all food can be improved by adding hot sauce. The differences in politics tend to mean less because we just like hanging out with each other and we feel the same about stuff that’s important on a day-to-day basis. We like doing the same things, we like a lot of the same movies, that sort of thing.
I guess what I’m saying is that if politics is a big part of your life, look for someone who feels the same. But if politics is that big a part of your life, you’re probably not very happy. Most of your day and most of your interactions with people should have to do with stuff other than political philosophy if you want to live a full, content life. As others have said, of course, there’s a lot of libertarianism that is a moral code, and that part you shouldn’t compromise, but I find that a lot of people who are progressives or conservatives or whatever when it comes to governance are more libertarian than not in their dealings with actual people.
As long as Dan Snyder keeps doing what he’s doing to the Redskins, he’s alright in my book.
May the fleas of a 1000 camels come to roost in your private parts! and that of Snyder as well.
So you are good with your daughter being raised to be a full SJW proggie?
How are you going to react when your wife starts indoctrinating her into the cult of the perpetually aggreived? Just sit there and not fight back? If you do interject how do you think the wife is going to react to your filling her head with lies and denying her rights as a female?
Mrs. Mad Scientist is one of the drivers on my race team. Mrs. Mad Scientist is AWESOME!
Correction to lead sentence:
First of all, we know there are no libertarian women out there, Banjos and Riven are
takenTulpa.Disagree on politics? Whatev. Mrs. Dean is pretty apolitical, on the few issues she has opinions on, we may not agree, but we also don’t really care that we don’t agree. I think it probably helps that most of the time when politics comes up in conversation, its to laugh at the morons.
Won’t shut up about politics? You may have a problem, and that’s only one symptom.