Monday Afternoon Links

Its been a productive Monday so far. Have an extra link and some extra music.

  • There’s an Ice Age acomin’! Just far enough out that NOW! is when we need to fund the research. I’m sorry, do I sound cynical? TW: autoplay

    London Freezing!
  • Dear FBI, I’ll do it for $875K next time. They paid $900,000 to unlock the San Bernadino shooter’s iPhone
  • Trump continues to overperform my expectations in court nominees.
  • Trump: I’m not sticking my neck in that noose. Are we even doing phrasing anymore?
  • Your bullshit scare-study of the day.
  • Let’s you and him fight.
  • This Florida Girl is tougher than you.

In response to a discussion in the AM Links, I give you three tracks off of three consecutive albums, and I could have picked at least one other song off of each album in place of these, but I just decided to stick to the funky lines. One, two, three.

Comments

349 responses to “Monday Afternoon Links”

  1. Jimbo

    An Ice Age coming? Is there anything global warming cannot do?!

    1. Playa Manhattan

      Heat the planet?

    2. Jimbo

      For all you youngsters, it used to be called global warming. That was AFTER is was global cooling and BEFORE it became climate change

      1. kbolino

        I still can’t tell if “climate change” is what it’s supposed to be called, or if it is some kind of nefarious plot by the vast right-wing conspiracy* to undermine science, or what. All I know for sure is that no matter it is called, it’s all about humans raping sacred mother Gaia who was perfect before us and will be perfect again once we are gone.

        * = I really wish I was just making this up, but alas…

        1. Jimbo

          I seriously doubt the right-wing is capable of doing this. Just look at Congress. (of course, that’s what I would say since I am part of the conspiracy! bwahahahahahahaha!)

          1. kbolino

            You just can’t fathom how nefarious the right is! Some dude you’ve probably never heard of penned a memo in the late 1990s that sought to undermine the entire scientific community by calling it “climate change”* and sowing the seeds of doubt in the public consciousness that they never would have had if they had just been exposed to the 97% consensus!

            * = Never mind that the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change has been around and operating under that name since the 1980s.

        2. Playa Manhattan

          I’m still not convinced that Al Gore isn’t a plant. He’s done more to damage the warmist movement than a billion Koch Brothers.

          1. Pope Jimbo

            I met Al Gore when I was going to school at Memphis State. If his daddy hadn’t also been a Senator, he would have spent his life in a single wide. He wasn’t smart enough to work his way up to a double wide.

          2. Jimbo

            He wasn’t smart enough to work his way up to a double wide.

            I don’t know about that…have you seen his wife?

          3. Playa Manhattan

            He failed out of divinity school.

            That’s pretty fucking hard to do when the right answer is always “because Jesus”.

          4. Brett L

            You fail. The other answer is “SATAN!” the division depends on whom you’re affiliated with. Baptists are about 50/50, Methodists are 99% Jesus.

          5. kbolino

            Do you think he and Nye are working together? Because man, just as people were starting to forget about Gore, in rides Bill Nye on his Horse of Derp…

          6. IntraveneousWoodChipper

            No kidding. Gore is such a douchebag that I want the planet to burn just to spire him: the smarmy internet-inventing bastard!

          7. IntraveneousWoodChipper

            *spite

        3. Rufus the Monocled

          Back in the early 2000s there was an opinion piece in The National Post where the writer warned global warming (not sure if the term climate change was around) was all about uprooting capitalism and nothing else. And she was prescient given some of the signs I’ve seen over the years said things like ‘System change now!’ during climate protests. I wish I remember her name.

          1. thom

            The progs don’t even try to get around this these days. Climate change is a result of capitalism and consumerism. What is needed is to get rid of the capitalism and consumerism and implement…something else. But won’t that something else be just as bad? Doesn’t matter, intentions are good.

            For every old fogey rambling on about solar power and recycling you can find 10 kids chanting “Climate Justice Now!”

          2. Hyperion

            “What is needed is to get rid of the capitalism”

            Which would result in most people living in extreme poverty. But I’m sure they’re ok with that, because feelz. You get to feel good while living like people did several hundred years ago.

          3. Contrarian P

            But of course not them. Because soy lattes, Teslas, and Apple computers are totally one with Gaia. The poverty is for the little, dirty people who cling to their guns and religion, don’t you know.

          4. thrakkorzog

            Well, It’s nice to not think about all those kids digging up rare earth metals to support those good thoughts.

      2. David Dilley, CEO of Global Weather Oscillations, told Daily Star Online global warming and cooling cycles are determined by the gravitational forces of the Earth, moon and sun.

        DENIER!!! ITS THE CARBONZ!!!!

        1. Jimbo

          You mean there are some things BEYOND OUR CONTROL?
          That’s just heretic talk, I tell ya!

        2. mr simple

          Why is he so anti-science?

          CEO

          Ah, obviously for the evil profits.

    3. Floridaman

      Please, not another one of those movies.

      1. one true athena

        what’s so hilarious about that, is “The Day After Tomorrow” (the Sudden Ice Age disaster movie of 2004), could not have been made probably much later than that or it would’ve run afoul of being called Denialist Propaganda or some such.

        1. jesse.in.mb

          I’ve seen that movie soooo many times. It was just called Tomorrow-u in Korean and it was randomly really popular on the cable networks I had access to. It was always that or Star Crapuhtuh

  2. Worker and Parasite

    $900k to confirm that their motives were a complete mystery and unrelated to any ideology. Bang-up work, FBI.

    1. Playa Manhattan

      The funny part is that Feinstein revealed that number accidentally. Because she’s senile.

      1. Pope Jimbo

        Senile would imply that at one time she was sentient.

        I think she is as sharp today as she was back in her 20’s.

      2. westernsloper

        Is the senile old bat going to be brought up on charges for revealing that super secret classified information?

    2. Q Continuum

      A complete mystery? *Pfft* Clearly they were Christian Anti-abortion extremists false-flagging the Religion of Peace. Get it together W&P.

  3. In response to a discussion in the AM Links, I give you three tracks off of three consecutive albums, and I could have picked at least one other song off of each album in place of these, but I just decided to stick to the funky lines. One, two, three.

    1-2-3

      1. Gilmore

        I love that movie

        1. Yes, mein Führer.

          1. AlmightyJB

            Burkhalter didn’t even have to change his accent.

    1. Brett L

      I worked for the company that paralyzed her.

      1. I thought they only broke her back, not paralyzed her.

        1. Brett L

          Oops. You’re right. We just put her in a wheelchair for 10 months.

    2. Playa Manhattan

      Would.

      Then, and probably now.

  4. Playa Manhattan

    “Is grandparents’ old-school parenting putting kids at risk?”

    No. Or there wouldn’t be any grandkids.

    1. Betteridge strikes again.

    2. Agent Cooper

      I dunno. Maybe ask their smack-addled parents.

    3. Contrarian P

      I liked the part where only 24% of them damn pediatricians were able to answer the quiz that they’re griefing old people about.

  5. Juvenile Bluster

    Your Monday Afternoon Nut-Punch:

    Minnesota officer acquitted of assault for punching 14-year-old girl in the face. His lawyer said “He didn’t mean to hurt her!”

    1. Playa Manhattan

      “Police released squad car video of the incident Thursday…”

      Not pictured: the video. Thanks, Fox News.

      1. Jimbo

        Hey, they just report the news!

    2. Jimbo

      Hey, JB: Thanks for reminding me of the Axis of Time trilogy. I didn’t read the 3rd book, for some reason, so I read it last weekend.
      I forgot what a lefty John Birmingham is. Case in point: The USS Hillary Clinton. I really want to add a comment to his blog about how unlikely it is for that to happen.

      For more lulz, here is his blog:
      http://cheeseburgergothic.com

      1. Floridaman

        Was it a trash barge?

        1. Jimbo

          Zing!

      2. SugarFree

        I never bothered with the books. I mean, I have already seen The Final Countdown.

        1. Jimbo

          True. I saw the movie, but I generally prefer a book to a movie.

          1. SugarFree

            Not the first time Australian science fiction has done this, to be honest. The Quiet Earth was a very blatant rip-off of The World, the Flesh, and the Devil.

          2. Worker and Parasite

            When are you submitting a piece that surveys post-apocalyptic fiction?

          3. I assume they got actors better than Mel Ferrer and Harry Belafonte, however.

          4. SugarFree

            Not really… The lead on Quiet Earth was pretty good, but the love interest was pretty screechy.

            The World, The Flesh, and The Devil is a difficult movie to see. It came out on VHS, but never DVD (or at least not since I last looked.) I got lucky and saw it at The George Eastman House / International Museum of Photography in Rochester, NY when I was on a training course. It was a double feature with Panic In The Year Zero! the hilariously bad adaption of Ward Moore‘s “Lot.”

          5. SugarFree

            About damn time. I guess I gave up looking after I was able to record it off of Turner Classic Movies at some point.

          6. I enjoy Panic in Year Zero! Ray Milland and Frankie Avalon. Poor Ray took a big step down later in his career.

          7. SIV

            Panic In the Year Zero is a Great Movie.

            The ending kinda sucks but what do ya expect for 1962 (or whatever)?

          1. thrakkorzog

            If it involves tricks as something whores do for money, or candy, then yes I have.

        2. BakedPenguin

          I saw the crappy Europe video. Does that count?

          1. SugarFree

            “We’re heading for Venus… Venus…”

            Venus is a terrible destination. The air pressure on the ground is absurdly high and it’s hot enough to melt lead. C’mon, Europe. Get your head in the game.

          2. BakedPenguin

            Maybe that was the “final” part. Once they got there, it would be pretty final.

    3. Pope Jimbo

      JB, you gotta read the real Minnesoda news. Not that Faux News shit.

      Some smart guy linked to a way better version of this story last Friday. That version has the video and an awesome quote from the defense lawyer saying that the girl shaped up real nice after getting punched.

      1. OneOut

        I would have punced her too.

        I you close your eyes I promise there are times one cannot distinguish her squelling from that of a stuck pig and at maximum volume. And that was before she was struck.

        Anything to shut her up.

        1. IntraveneousWoodChipper

          So…would?

        2. Grumbletarian

          From watching the video, his solution didn’t seem to have worked. Maybe punch harder next time? Not like there’ll be consequences for the cop, right?

    4. Grumbletarian

      Soucheray was accused of punching the girl after she spat at him.

      After watching the video, that seems like a completely accurate description of what happened.

      NOT GUILTY!

  6. Worker and Parasite

    Gray Death can kill with one dose

    Your new drug scare for the week.

    1. Negroni Please

      seeing as how “dose” is an arbitrary and meaningless word, I guess literally anything can kill with a single dose….

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        Ban dihydrogen monoxide!

        1. Mad Scientist

          Unregulated industry uses it as a cleaning agent and then they just pour it into our sewer systems!

          1. Enough About Palin

            So I’m in the men’s room at the office. It’s a super green building. One year old. Anyway, a maintenance guy came in and started pouring a clear liquid down the sink drains. I asked him what it was. He said hot water. He told me that because the facets are so low-flow, the pipes get all gunke-up with soap and whatnot. Funny that.

          2. Fatty Bolger

            Like the low-flow toilets that force you to flush twice. Brilliant.

          3. jesse.in.mb

            I dunno. The early low-flow toilets sucked. They were generally just high flow toilets with the tank fill bob set lower, but the newer ones are actually better than some of the high-flow ones I’ve used in other states.

          4. LT_Fish

            I like the ones that have an option to flush for piss or crap – don’t necessarily need to use quite so much water for one of them.

            That being said….I’ve lived in a few places where “if it’s yellow let it mellow” is gospel – not much fun either.

          5. Gadfly

            That’s a funny story. Low-flow is such a ridiculous proposition: unless the community is in a desert, there’s probably not actually a shortage of water. And water is such a useful cleaning agent it’s a travesty to artificially restrict its use.

          6. jesse.in.mb

            Not necessarily. A lot of areas have had trouble keeping up with population growth and processing enough water (or on the other end waste water) to support the size of the community. Small improvements in water use can ease growing pains considerably.

          7. thrakkorzog

            North Texas isn’t exactly known for it’s Prius driving hippies, but when the local lakes run low, then it is time to hold back a bit on flushing everything that comes out of you down the drain.

          8. I keep pliers in my suitcase (when I’m driving) and remove the flow restrictor from all the hotel showers. It’s working less and less as they integrate the low flow into the handle. But I feel like I’m doing my part for society to have better showers.

    2. Lead is gray, isn’t it?

    3. Playa Manhattan

      “which is comprised of heroin, fentanyl, the elephant tranquilizer carfentanil,”

      Hmmm. I think I figured out the problem.

      1. Brett L

        If only there were some way for safe, legal, pharmaceutical quality heroin to be delivered to those who wanted it, and for producers who misrepresented their product to be held liable.

        1. Playa Manhattan

          The Tijuana 24 hour veterinary clinic?

        2. jesse.in.mb

          Bayer?

      2. Just Say’n

        Christ. That sounds like the recipe for immediate death

    4. Q Continuum

      “Strychnine can kill with one dose”

      True statement, yet I should care if other people decide to take it because?

      1. Caput Lupinum

        Because they’ll leave stiff corpses in awkward positions that’ll make the undertaker’s job that much harder? If you’re gonna off yourself, no reason to make it harder on unrelated third parties.

      2. Hyperion

        “yet I should care if other people decide to take it because?”

        Because the children, duh!

    5. Trolleric the Goth

      someone call JC Denton and UNATCO to get us all our Ambrosia back!

      that bastard Bob Page is out to kill us all

      1. Floridaman

        We didn’t ask for this.

    6. OneOut

      “most alarming to officials is that users have no way of knowing …..”

      uhmmm…….what if there was a way for users to know what they eere getting ?

      Lets see….that would mean that what is most alarming to officials would’t alarm them any more and users would be less likely to overdose . wow

      *makes note to self to try and come up with some way users would be able to know what they were getting so that officials wouldn’t be alarmed and would cut down on over doses.*

    7. Hyperion

      They just cannot help themselves, can they?

  7. Juvenile Bluster

    Your second Monday Afternoon nut punch, which I had all ready to go and then saw TSTSNBN also posted on:

    Middle school student suspended for liking a photo of a gun on Instagram. The suspension was later lifted because somebody presumably slapped some sense into the superintendent, who still seems to think he did nothing wrong.

    Below is the statement given to FOX19 NOW by Superintendent Russ Fussnecker:

    “Concerning the recent social media posting of a gun with the caption “Ready”, and the liking of this post by another student, the policy at Edgewood City Schools reads as follows:

    The Board has a “zero tolerance” of violent, disruptive, harassing, intimidating, bullying, or any other inappropriate behavior by its students.

    Furthermore, the policy states:

    Students are also subject to discipline as outlined in the Student Code of Conduct that occurs off school property when the misbehavior adversely affects the educational process.

    As the Superintendent of the Edgewood City Schools, I assure you that any social media threat will be taken serious including those who “like” the post when it potentially endangers the health and safety of students or adversely affects the educational process.”

    1. The Board has a “zero tolerance” of violent, disruptive, harassing, intimidating, bullying, or any other inappropriate behavior by its students.

      Bullying by the administration, however, they’re totally fine with.

      And they also have a zero tolerance policy toward free speech.

      1. Jimbo

        But how else with they protect our future (the children)?

        1. Juvenile Bluster

          I believe the children are our future
          Teach them well and let them lead the way
          Show them all the beauty they possess insiiiiiiiide

          DAMN YOU 1980S CHILDHOOD

          1. Learning to sex yourself,
            It is the greatest sex of all….

          2. Contrarian P

            Randy Watson? Is that you??

          1. Jimbo

            JFC! I am also our future, but just not as long as the kids.

        2. mr simple

          You misspelled prosecute.

    2. Q Continuum

      Well, if speech is violence, then I guess this qualifies as attempted murder then. Right?

    3. Floridaman

      Liking pictures of guns is double plus ungood bellyfeel.

    4. Raston Bot

      at my kids’ schools, the teachers just tell them to chill out with all the violence and guns in their drawings during school. so far no real trouble. fucking Star Wars lego kits poisoning the yutes, amirite?

    5. “Superintendent Russ Fussnecker:”

      Enough said.

  8. John Titor

    Reprint of a comment I made in the other thread, with some additional stuff:

    It’s interesting to me that The Other Site’s response to the French election has been ‘thank god the pro-free market candidate won!’. Yes, the former employee of Rothschilds and the socialist party won’t be cronyist at all. And boy those ‘free market reforms’ will sure be great ten to fifteen years down the road when EU authoritarianism pushed for a more planned economy (fortunately for them, I think the EU is likely dead in the long run anyway).

    It’s almost like tearing down the EU is priority one to prevent some horrific bureaucratic totalitarianism or something. But virtue signal about the evils of Le Pen is surely better than, I don’t know, actual strategy.

    …And I think that’s one of the things that drove me absolutely nuts about The Other Sites’ content outside of singular issues: they have absolutely zero goddamn perspective. Sure, you’ve got KMW with her robot fetish and Bailey’s blind technocratic transhumanism and (frankly sad) devotion to ‘atheist heaven’ in the form of immortality, but no one there is able to look at politics or economics and consider the reality five, ten, or twenty years down the road. Instead it needs to be the immediate self-gratification of backing the “pro-market” candidate despite the 98% of garbage they just handwave off. Who the hell cares if Macron cuts one or two regulations while the EU throws another six dozen on? Reason does. That is not a winning strategy, and completely disavowing and avoiding ‘outsider’ candidates for various virtue signalling is really just long term support for the status quo and its stagnation.

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      To be absolutely fair: Compared to Le Pen, he is pro-free market. However, given that Le Pen may have been further left on economic issues than the actual socialist candidate, that doesn’t say much.

      1. John Titor

        This is true, but again, does or does not Macron’s ‘pro market’ positions somehow overrule his support for the EU, an increasingly expansive and controlling bureaucratic state? Reason is entirely unwilling to recognize or even address this, and will never admit that there is something beneficial to holding one’s nose and letting the shitbag populist do some idiotic things while also allowing them to do something that will be far, far more beneficial in the long run.

        1. Rufus the Monocled

          There was no good choice. France is already finished anyway.

          La 18ieme is already lost.

          1. John Titor

            So now the French Canadians get to be even more egotistical and declare themselves the last true remnant of France again (they already did this after the French Revolution of course).

          2. Rufus the Monocled

            It’s an upgrade at this point.

    2. Just Say’n

      Cheering on a socialist is fun!

      There were no good candidates in that run-off. It would have been best if they both lost and the heir to the House of Bonaparte seized the country in a coup.

      1. kbolino

        Bonapartists, feh! Isn’t there some half-cousin thrice removed from Bourbon lineage somewhere that can lay claim to title?

        1. Just Say’n

          https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jean-Christophe,_Prince_Napol%C3%A9on

          He works as an investment banker in New York. That pansy should have staged a coup. Napoleon I and Napoleon III are rolling in their graves

          1. Floridaman

            Perhaps he is just building up enough money to hire mercenaries.

          2. kbolino

            Apparently there are two other pretenders, and all three of them have Bourbon lineage. That is… oddly unsurprising. Royal incest FTW!

          3. Rick C-137

            I fell down the rabbit hole of European contenders to the throne once on Wikipedia. It’s so strange to my mind, which was raised to admire republicanism, that some people still have claims to thrones, that they persist in thier lineage tracking. The world is a strange place, but the the past is strange in a different way.

          4. Just Say’n

            Don’t go talking trash about the Hapsburg pretender to the throne of Austria.

          5. Rick C-137

            So, true story:

            One of my college friends is or was at the time a down right monarchical/papal absolutist. He went on a study abroad to Paris and got to take communion with the Bonaparte Pretender, at a royalist mass. He got a white scarf and everything.

            He woulda made love to that scarf if it were possible.

          6. jesse.in.mb

            You’re IRL friends with Eddie?

          7. Rick C-137

            Not that I know of, unless Eddie is currently the mayor of a small Ohio town. But yeah I admit the similarities are strange.

          8. Just Say’n

            I once came across a business that had an old wooden chair with the emblem of the Hapsburg family. I asked her where she got it and she said it had been passed down in her family for four generations. I told her that it had the insignia of the House of Hapsburg. She had no idea what I was talking about, so I offered to buy it and she refused.

            Your friend probably would have wanted to have carnal relations with that chair, too. I wanted to steal it.

          9. Jesse says what we were all thinking.

          10. Rick C-137

            I forget, was Ann Boulin a Hapsburg? Being Catholic my friend hated, HATED, Ann Boulin.

          11. Just Say’n

            Ann Bolyn was not a Catholic. She was one of the sparks that led to Henry VIII breaking with the Catholic Church.

          12. Rick C-137

            Yeah, that’s why he hatred her. He saw the Catholic Church as the glue that held together western civ, so every fracture in its control was a real sore point for him.

          13. Just Say’n

            Your friend sounds smart

          14. Just Say’n

            The only thing worse than the Bourbons would be the Orleans. You either go full-on Divine Right of Kings or you go home. No pussy footing like those silly Orleans.

            How’d that work out for them?

            https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/French_Revolution_of_1848

          15. Just Say’n

            Ann Boulin was not a Hapsburg

          16. Floridaman

            Obviously not, the Hapsburg chin would have prevented the sword from working.

          17. Just Say’n

            She also wasn’t a Hapsburg, I meant

          18. John Titor

            I get the feeling that his coup might have ended up another Hundred Days, as the Eighth Coalition, EU addition sans Britain, dogpiled him.

          19. Floridaman

            Sixth, also the fact the next leader of France would have been installed in part by the Russian army might make the left finally go completely crazy.
            https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/War_of_the_Sixth_Coalition

          20. John Titor

            I was referring to the War of the Seventh Coalition that began as a response to the Hundred Days, because Napoleon returning from exile fits more than the end of the initial empire.

          21. Gadfly

            If he actually had the tactical skills of Napoleon, I’d think he’d have a good shot at winning Waterloo-part-deux, even leading an army of Frenchmen. Without Britain, the coalition would be reliant on Prussia/Germany, and I don’t think the Germans possess much martial prowess after having it beaten out of them in two successive losses.

      2. Rick C-137

        I was actually hoping for a La Pen election to force a gov’t crisis, collapsing the republic and allowing the pretender to the throne to ascend again.

  9. Q Continuum

    There’s an Ice Age acomin’!

    I suppose it was inevitable “they” (scare-mongering, moronic, opportunistic, Nyes) would have to switch to that sometime. I mean, clearly the only reason the climate isn’t warming as modeled must mean that the magical Ice Age of death is happening way ahead of schedule. It just snuck up on us so quietly, we didn’t have time to build more Coal Powered CO2 Emission Doomsday Machines to offset it… or something? Can anyone keep track of what apocalypse I’m supposed to be terrified of today?

    1. Weren’t they claiming back in the 70s that the ice age was coming?

      1. Mad Scientist

        Yep. Then that didn’t happen, so they switched to warming. Then they discovered the climate fluctuates all on its own, so now it’s just change.

        1. Q Continuum

          But never doubt that whatever happens it will be OUR FAULT. Global warming/global cooling/climate change and watermelon environmentalism in general is the Original Sin of The Church of Progressivism.

          1. Hyperion

            Yes, definitely our fault that the sun is likely headed for a minimum cycle that will last maybe 30 years and has just started. Someone forgot to turn up the sun thermostat because why else, global warming made them forget.

      2. Pope Jimbo

        In the early ’70s we lived out on a hobby farm in NW Minnesoda. Maybe it was because I was a kid, but I remember a string of 2-4 winters in a row that were brutal. I think that a lot of people remember that same string and use that as a baseline for what “normal” is.

        Now that we have less brutal winters everyone thinks that it is all due to “warming”.

        Given the paucity of accurate weather readings over history, it is impossible to say with any certainty what the real baseline should be.

        1. Playa Manhattan

          A hobby farm?

          Please tell me that it was an organic Alpaca hair farm.

          1. Vhyrus

            Shade grown orphans, natch.

        2. kbolino

          The planet has been habitable for animal life for hundreds of millions of years. We could go through 1000 years of “unusually warm” or “unusually cold” that would be utterly meaningless statistical noise but would seem to us like drastic changes in climate. We can’t begin to establish a meaningful baseline or to contextualize aberrations because the data just isn’t there.

          1. Fatty Bolger

            True. And there’s a ton of solid science showing that we’re in an ice age right now. This is just an interglacial warming period in a long-term cooling period. And very few of the “I fucking love science!” assholes would even know what you were talking about if you mentioned that. Having to acknowledge this in climate studies is why the “rate of change” argument became so popular.

    2. stilljustcarol

      The apocalypse that you should be terrified today is the same one they tried to terrify us with in the seventies. We’re all going to freeze to death. Unless we don’t. If we don’t we will all burn up. Just be terrified and you’ll have all your bases covered.

      1. Hyperion

        The apocalypse we should all fear will most definitely be caused by politicians, economic collapse, nuclear war, civil wars, anarchy, whatever.

      2. Fatty Bolger

        The fact is, though, that everything we really know about climate cycles says there will be another glacial period after the current interglacial, which we are likely at or near the peak of. When that will happen is anybody’s guess. “Some time in the next 10,000 years” isn’t very helpful for either planning, or scare mongering.

    3. Floridaman

      As an investor in the fossil fuel industry I would like to say you’re all welcome for me preventing the Ice Age, please deposit all grant money into my bank account. Also I’ll take my Nobel prize now.

  10. jesse.in.mb

    A 10-year-old girl survived an alligator attack in Florida by poking her fingers in the animal’s nostrils and prying open its jaws, officials have said.

    The young girl’s amazing escape was said to have resulted from survival techniques she learned at Gatorland, an alligator adventure park.

    Because of course that’s a thing.

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      Gatorland is awesome! Don’t disparage it!

      There’s also a luxury hotel called the Gaylord Palms near the parks that has several gators in it from that park.

      1. jesse.in.mb

        Indian friends took me out to Gaylord Indian Food in Los Angeles and I had to suppress snickers the whole time because I was in HS and clearly not as mature as I am now. Apparently it’s now closed.

        1. and clearly not as mature as I am now.

          Assumes facts not in evidence.

        2. Playa Manhattan

          The Gaylord in Orlando looks awesome. It’s on the list.

          1. Floridaman

            It definitely is worth it, The ice display is hit or miss.

          2. Playa Manhattan

            The Christmas one?

            I’d be happy to see it at least once. I’m not above getting drunk and going down those ice slides.

          3. Floridaman

            Yep, the slide is really fun though.

        3. OneOut

          what kind of Indians ?

          call center or casino ?

    2. stilljustcarol

      It is here in Florida. Does that seem odd to you?

      1. Playa Manhattan

        It’s right where it should be.

        1. Mad Scientist

          I’ve been to this one. In Colorado!

          1. Playa Manhattan

            The google maps symbol for it is a frosty beer mug. I guess that makes sense.

    3. Worker and Parasite

      What survival techniques does Disneyland offer?

      1. Floridaman

        How to deal with being crushed by overweight tourists.

      2. Playa Manhattan

        Withstanding body odor. Space Mountain smells like France in July.

    4. Q Continuum

      When I lived in Miami, there was a gator theme park you could visit about halfway to Belle Glade in the middle of nowhere. One attraction was watching a man wrestle with (at least what looked like) a 10 footer. Between both hands he had two fingers and neither was a thumb.

      1. Juvenile Bluster

        Billie Swamp Safari?

        1. Q Continuum

          I think that’s the one; this was back in ’05 which gave the whisky 12 more years to make things foggy though.

      2. Playa Manhattan

        “he had two fingers and neither was a thumb.”

        The next deep dish debate.

        Fingers aren’t thumbs. Discuss.

        1. jesse.in.mb

          Digits?

          1. Q Continuum

            Kind of forward, you haven’t even bought me a drink yet.

          2. Playa Manhattan

            What will a 55 gallon drum of lube get him?

          3. Q Continuum

            A whole week’s worth of use?

          4. Caput Lupinum

            All the way in, if it’s good lube.

          5. jesse.in.mb

            you haven’t even bought me a drink yet

            Is that still a thing? I thought I just had to swipe right or something these days.

          6. Q Continuum

            I’ll stick with the old fashioned way since it’s just so tough to determine if Tinder hookups pass the Turing test.

          7. jesse.in.mb

            Are you saying you wouldn’t hit and quit “not an escaped AI”? I feel like that’s speciesist or something.

          8. Q Continuum

            Does it have a nice rack?

          9. Playa Manhattan

            Speciesist?

            Jesse likes bestiality. You heard it here first.

          10. jesse.in.mb

            Jesse likes bestiality. You heard it here first.

            When did you become the National Enquirer?

        2. Most fingers are, in fact, not thumbs.

          Now whether thumbs are fingers….

        3. The Sleeper

          Thumbs are a type of finger. Fight me.

          1. Playa Manhattan

            I’m gonna have Ted check your grammar first. Turn your head and cough.

    5. Juvenile Bluster

      I mean, if you’re going to say “because of course that’s a thing” to any Orlando theme park, it should be The Holy Land Experience

      1. Worker and Parasite

        Suicide bombers and rocket attacks?

      2. Rick C-137

        Saw it on the Religulous movie.

        I see your Florida and Raise you a Kentucky

        https://arkencounter.com/

        1. Floridaman

          Hey maybe they could sell space to the progs for when global warming floods the earth, seems like a really easy way to make money.

          1. Rick C-137

            One would think. But the progs, just like the heathen in antediluvian times mock Ken Ham, the last Neanderthal, so when the flood does come, in a twist of Shyamalan irony he will be saved but they will not.

        2. Juvenile Bluster

          I seriously want to go to the Ark Encounter and the Creationist Museum. Just for the fun of it. I’d get a few laughs I’m sure.

          1. Rick C-137

            If you are ever in KY let me know. I have a few other atheist rascal friends who also want to go and mock Ken Ham, the last Neanderthal.

          2. Private Chipperbot

            My inlaws wanted to stop there (not as a joke) on our way to Gatlinburg. I found out it was $60/ticket and put the kibosh on it. No way I was paying that much just for my own giggles.

          3. jesse.in.mb

            When it first opened a bunch of people at a paleontology convention nearby went to the Creationist Museum as a “fun outing” and I guess a bunch of them left in tears because it was so bad.

          4. Rick C-137

            I watched the YouTube atheist community descend in protest, saw a few funny videos of people debating creationist. But honestly it’s not as fun for me as it used to be. As it turns out, the athiest community have largely replaced God with Big Gov and a lot of them have a stick up the butt about being more enlightened. I just make fun of creationist because they are plainly wrong but I think it would be a waste of time to engage them in marathon debates on their home turf. Also after a while it would feel like mocking a retard.

          5. westernsloper

            Unless the creationist is forcing his or her beliefs on you, why in the fuck would you care what they think? I don’t get atheists or whateverists hassling people. I am pretty sure the whole, “the state can’t establish a religion” thing is covered in the constitution.

            But you are right about the atheist community turning big gov. I know a bunch of creationists, and they are not big gov. They couldn’t give a flying fuck if you don’t believe in god. Free will Yo.

          6. John Titor

            I think that it’s entirely fair to criticize and mock the creationist dialogue in general, because it overall is based on nonsense (even when you get into the Christian faith as a whole, you have the Catholic Church recognizing evolution as a valid and supported way of viewing creation). There’s certainly a field for dealing with creationism in general, but overall the ‘New Atheists’ are pretty much just as bad for producing their own unfounded and unjustified faiths in say, government.

    6. Brett L

      We’re only about 25 years removed from roadside “Gator Wrasslin” attractions that were legitimately dangerous to everyone including the gators. I think a couple of them are still around, but not like they were in the 50s-80s. Now kids don’t get bored on the long car rides because (a)flying is cheap and (b)tablets.

  11. John Titor

    Grandparents who step in for child care tend to use the same practices they did when they were parenting,

    When I was a wee lad my grandfather taught me how to swim by throwing me in a lake.

    Pretty sure these people would have a heart attack over that.

    1. Worker and Parasite

      And the tough part was getting out of the bag first?

    2. jesse.in.mb

      For a second I thought we were still talking about gator wrasslin

      1. Hyperion

        You only get to the gator wrasslin part if you make it out of the bag.

    3. Vhyrus

      Your grandfather was John Wayne?

      Lucky bastard.

    4. Chipwooder

      The “official” pediatric best practices change every other year anyway. That example they cite about the ice bath? Eight years ago, my pediatrician specifically recommended we do that to my then-infant son when he spiked a fever of 105. And that wasn’t some shady doctor, either, he practiced at the biggest and most reputable pediatric clinic in the region.

    5. mexican sharpshooter

      I think this depends on the grandparent. My grandfather was also a sadist. His favorite meal was cheap, Canadian whisky. He learned to swim by being thrown in a canal. This one time, he he handed me $5 and told me to buy him a pack of Marlboro Reds. Do you know what I learned that day?

      A six year old shouldn’t cross the street on his own.

  12. Rufus the Monocled

    Re Grandparents. That’s right. Let’s further disrupt the family.

    1. Playa Manhattan

      That’s the plan.

    2. Juvenile Bluster

      Look at the study. Talking about how working parents sometimes have no choice to put their kids in the hands of their grandparents for the day. Talking about how grandparents do things the wrong way.

      I’ve seen this enough times to know what the argument is: We need to have more government-funded child care, because our children are not safe in the hands of their grandparents.

      1. Playa Manhattan

        “Stay away from your Republican grandparents!”

      2. Rufus the Monocled

        What we’re observing is a friction between parents and grandparents where the parents aren’t disciplining and handling their kids properly in certain situations. The grandparents are usually right.

        1. Caput Lupinum

          This is why I’m stricter than my parents. My daughter loves going to nana and pop pop’s, they spoil her. Which was the same dynamic with my parents and grandparents. Biggest problem I have with my parents is my father was perfectly happy for my sisters and I to disappear into the woods or God knew where for the whole day but he now he loses his shit when he doesn’t know exactly where his granddaughter is at all moments.

          1. Rufus the Monocled

            There’s also exactly that in some cases. Grandparents get to ‘have fun’ with their grandkids but others are seeing themselves thrust back into parenting. In my personal case, my father is exactly as he was with us. My mother was always a nervous nelly.

          2. Caput Lupinum

            My parents are fairly similar in attitude with my daughter as they were with me, My father’s new helicoptering not withstanding. It’s more along the lines of my parents having a larger amount of money and free time than when they were parents, and having one child to spend that money and time on instead of three.

          3. Playa Manhattan

            It’s very different when you’re working vs. retired.

            I’m sure my dad would have spent a lot more time with me if he wasn’t busy working to feed and clothe me. No complaints; that’s just the way it is.

          4. Caput Lupinum

            Pretty much. No grudges against the old man. He worked nights for thirty years to keep food on the table. I think a good chunk of his change in behavior is his way of making up for lost time now that he’s retired and he finally has time.

          5. Viking1865

            I’m sure my dad would have spent a lot more time with me if he wasn’t busy working to feed and clothe me. No complaints; that’s just the way it is.

            Yeah friend’s wife was bitching about how her sister’s husband “never has time for the kids”. Dude is tending bar a few nights a week to make end’s meet, meanwhile her house is kinda dirty and she certainly isn’t spending all her time at the gym. Kids are in school all day, somehow she is unable to find even a part time job.

          6. Playa Manhattan

            My parents are an extension of me. My rules for the kids apply even when I’m not there. Yeah, my parents might spoil the kids a bit, but they’re very careful not to undermine me.

            My in-laws, on the other hand… there’s a reason they’re not allowed to stay here or be unsupervised with the kids.

          7. Rufus the Monocled

            ‘He’s gone! Quick pull out the The Great Book of California Derp! We only have one hour to indoctrinate!’

          8. Playa Manhattan

            My dad got me a subscription to Reason when I was 15. I need not worry about that.

        2. My grandmother thought the TV was sending out rays that would harm you if you fell asleep too close to it.

          And she always called the couch a davenport.

          1. Hyperion

            “You kids get back away from that television (pronounced: Tell-ee-vision), you’ll get radiation poisoning and die!”

            Yep, been there.

    3. Brett L

      Obviously, the only thing to do is raise them all in community creches.

      1. westernsloper

        It takes a village.

    4. Q Continuum

      Family = Emotional attachment.
      Emotional attachment = Less allegiance to “the community”
      Less allegiance to “the community” = More skepticism of central authority
      More skepticism of central authority = DOUBLE PLUS UNGOOD

      So, yes, disrupt away.

      1. Gadfly

        Emotional attachment usually fosters more allegiance to “the community”, not less, but in strong communities “the community” and “the government” are often not synonymous. So yes, your general point about the family’s ability to disrupt social engineering is correct.

    5. Rick C-137

      Soon we’re just gonna have to admit that Brave New World is the superior Distopia

      https://www.enotes.com/homework-help/what-social-predestination-room-brave-new-world-16969

      1. Q Continuum

        Given the choice I’ll take orgy-porgy over room 101.

      2. BakedPenguin

        Not while SJWs are still a thing.
        Anti-Sex police? Check.
        Newspeak? Check.
        Thoughtcrime? Check.
        Two minutes hate? Check.
        Emmanuel Trumpstein? Check.
        Big Brother? Check (admittedly not necessarily an SJW thing, but also not going away soon)

        1. Floridaman

          Big Brother REEEEE.
          The proper Prog term is big Trans.

          1. Floridaman

            It would have been Big Lesbian Trans, however the acronym BLT is offensive to vegans..

          2. Rick C-137

            Big Sibling, or is that offensive the familially abled.

          3. Floridaman

            I am afraid I don’t have the newest edition of the newspeak dictionary, and Syme seems to have disappeared, so I can’t answer that one.

          4. Rick C-137

            Your lack of dedication has been noted comrade, you should expect a visit from MiniLuv at any time in the near future.

        2. Rick C-137

          I admit that it is tempting to see it swinging that way now, but the escapism and mass-produced and carefully curated lives that left the population unable to comprehend suffering while also leaving them unable to know anything but an orgasmic baseline is more real in terms of the creeping ease of falling into it. Already the progs are eating their own

    6. Worker and Parasite

      We’ll never be able to create the New Soviet Man Truly Woke Person if the family is allowed to remain intact.

  13. Hyperion

    “Trump continues to overperform my expectations in court nominees”

    Hopefully they’ll torment Hillary in 2021. Maybe even push here over the edge so that she truly goes away this time.

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      You don’t realize just how nefarious that is! Cutting and pasting an actual paragraph from the local newspaper…

      Changing his legal luck: It’s no secret that President Donald Trump has not had a particularly good run in court. But he can help craft his own future, Bloomberg News’ Jennifer Jacobs and Greg Stohr report, by installing conservative judges on federal courts. He’s nominated five of them today for the federal appeals court.

      1. Hyperion

        When the lefties were doing their happy dance over all of Trump’s efforts getting overturned, I guess they never considered that. They really are knee jerk reaction dopes who cannot think even one minute into the future. And now they’re ready to trot out Hillary once again, and their only alternatives are Liz Warren, Bernie, and Maxine Waters.

        1. Vhyrus

          I would say I would love for Waters to run, but then I remember just how stupid people are and the thought of her being president is just as frightening as Hillary.

          1. Hyperion

            Her being president wouldn’t be nearly as bad as Hillary. She’s dumber than a box of rocks and she’s not surrounded by a pool of politically savvy sycophants like the Clinton’s are. But she could never get elected, she’s goofier than Pelosi.

            It will be Hillary again regardless, she’s all but announced already and anyone who challenges her will wind up in the bottom of the Potomac with concrete shoes. The only one brave enough to even challenge her and stick it out is Bernie and there’s no way an out in the open 80 something communist is getting elected.

          2. thepasswordispassword

            Some of the crazies are speculating the Mark Zuckerberg is planning a run. He’s doing a national tour right now with plenty of pictures of him doing folksy things with folksy folks. Gave up atheism because “religion is important” but hasn’t really said much about what his religion is. The idea is a bit scary given facebook trying to filter wrong think and his love affair with China.

          3. Hyperion

            He looks like a zit faced 14 year old. And he’s a terrible speaker. I don’t see it.

          4. Somalian Road Corporation

            Regarding Zuckerberg, his strategy is: “I will make an obvious lie about no longer being an atheist and will say vague and meaningless banalities about spirituality and multiple religions–‘religion is very important’–to try and appease as many people as possible. Given what this and my other actions say about my character, you should vote for me to be in power over you.”

    2. Q Continuum

      I’ll be more interested to see if he follows through on his threat to break up the 9th Circus.

  14. Gilmore

    I give you three tracks off of three consecutive albums, and I could have picked at least one other song off of each album in place of these, but I just decided to stick to the funky lines. One, two, three.

    Talking Book/ Innervisions/Fulfillingness First Finale is an incredible string of records

    if you put Music of My Mind‘ (1972) at the beginning and Songs in the Key of Life (1976) at each end, it seems even more incredible. Basically everything he touched in the early 1970s was an instant classic. And all of that was simply because he was finally given creative control over his own records in 1971.

    1. westernsloper

      He is a musical mystery. Good stuff there.

  15. “In the Friday statement, issued when he signed the spending bill, Trump said he would treat the Historically Black College and University Financing Program Account “in a manner consistent with the requirement to afford equal protection of the laws under the Due Process Clause of the Constitution’s Fifth Amendment.””

    Dare I ask what his critics want him to do?

    The article seems short on specifics other than “Trump accused of some vague bad thing involving race, denies charges.”

    1. Q Continuum

      Trump: “I will follow the law.”
      Woke Hive Mind: “RAAAAAAAACIST!!!”

    2. Hyperion

      “Dare I ask what his critics want him to do?”

      One thing for sure, they don’t want him to pass a healthcare bill. I agree with them on that, but not for the same reasons at all. I want the government out of healthcare, they don’t want anyone messing with their massahs legacy.

  16. KibbledKristen

    Still looking for Justice Willett to be nominated to something on t he Fed level.

    1. Juvenile Bluster

      He’s going to be eventually. Has to be.

      Hope he wouldn’t have to drop off of twitter as a result.

  17. Q Continuum

    RE: Dystopian visions of America, Krugnuts would like to weigh in:

    https://www.nytimes.com/2017/05/08/opinion/republicans-party-like-its-1984.html

    1. Hyperion

      “There have been many bad laws in U.S. history. Some bills were poorly conceived; some were cruel and unjust; some were sold on false pretenses. Some were all of the above.”

      Well, have to admit, that’s a damn good description of Obamacare he did there.

      1. american socialist

        Like the aca and stimulus package and iran deal?

      2. american socialist

        The reagan tax cut was passed by democrats in congress

        1. Hyperion

          Krugabe is suffering from the same condition as the rest of the herd. It’s sort of like mass hysteria. I think they’re calling it TDS. Whatever it is, it’s terrible because I didn’t think there was anything that could make them act any dumber than they already have.

          I was reading some comments on another site about the GOP healthcare bill and one lefty was screeching something about how the GOP didn’t even read the bill. And I’m sure it wasn’t sarcasm. I wanted to comment and say ‘they have to pass it so we can find out what’s in it’, but I didn’t want to create an account just to tell some idiot something they wouldn’t even be able to comprehend.

      3. Q Continuum

        Remove elements to any specific health plan and he might as well be ranting against Obamacare through the whole piece:

        “It’s a miserably designed law, full of unintended consequences.”
        “Trumpcare was thrown together so fast it’s hard to believe any significant number of those voting for it even had time to read it.”
        “Even without a proper analysis, however, it’s clear that Trumpcare breaks every promise Republicans ever made about health. Deductibles will rise, not fall, as insurers are set free to offer lower-quality coverage.”

        Speaking of not passing the Turing test, is there anyway we can confirm that Krugnuts is an actual human and not just a prog deflection, projection and talking point algorithm?

        1. Hyperion

          “Deductibles will rise, not fall”

          But it’s perfectly ok that my deductible increased more than 400% under Obamacrap, because good intentions, right?

          1. Vhyrus

            Seriously. I am currently without healthcare because they want to charge me $400 a month for a fucking FIVE GRAND PREMIUM! ‘Fuck off slaver’ is one of a great many things I wish to say in regard to that.

          2. mexican sharpshooter

            Sounds like you made out better than most.

          3. Akira

            I pointed out to a “progressive” I know that Obama”care” forced me to purchase a plan for an individual that costed me $135 per month. That’s when I was making $11 per hour. He countered with “well we should spread the costs of healthcare to everyone anyway”.

            Wait wait, spread the costs of healthcare? Obama and the Dems assured us that this law would create an infinite wellspring of affordable healthcare for everyone, especially the poor! And since I was only making $11 per hour, that’s pretty damn poor, right? I mean, it’s only one dollar over the proposed minimum!

            They should save themselves effort and mount some wheels on those goalposts.

  18. Gilmore

    Unforeseen(?) outcome of vast-expansion of the definition of ‘Sexual Assault’ = No one knows how to distinguish bullshit non-events from serious abuse

    In a yearlong investigation , The Associated Press uncovered about 17,000 official reports of sex assaults by students in U.S. elementary and secondary schools over a four-year period. That tally is an undercount because such attacks are widely under-reported, and states vary in their efforts to track, classify and catalog sexual violence by students.

    AP’s analysis was based on state education records and supplemented by federal crime data, where the 2013 incident reported at Estill Middle School stood out.

    Boys and girls ranging from 11 to 16 were sneaking into the gym bathroom to engage in sexual activity, according to the sheriff’s office investigative report, which classified the conduct as forcible rape, forcible fondling and disorderly conduct.

    It reminds me of the way the left has changed the definition of “Terror” to “Violent Extremism” and suddenly pretends that every Sovereign Citizen who resists arrest is no different than an attempted Al-Qaeda bomber. The whole story is worth a read because it gives some perspective on the obvious consequences of ‘dumbing-down’ definitions = you swamp administrators with complaints, and they’re completely unable to figure out what’s bullshit hanky-panky and what is actually criminal-violence.

    1. Hyperion

      “Unforeseen(?) outcome of vast-expansion of the definition of ‘Sexual Assault’ = No one knows how to distinguish bullshit non-events from serious abuse”

      Wow, who would have figured?

  19. Gilmore

    Disney Creates “Avatar” Theme Park Which Actually Just Looks Like Lots of Close-Ups Of Hydroponic Weed

    also = munchies

    Disney also is testing out a new way to order food at Pandora. Before going to the park, visitors can pull up a menu on the My Disney Experience mobile app, order lunch and go about visiting the park. When it’s time to eat hours later, they can go to the canteen, tap on an app a button that notifies the cooks they are present. Several minutes later their food will be ready in a special line.

    1. jesse.in.mb

      File under: things nobody wants

    2. Q Continuum

      Those blue lion-human hybrid monster things made that movie unwatchable. I walked out.

  20. Q Continuum

    Known liar says some more lies from his lying mouth.

    http://www.breitbart.com/big-government/2017/05/08/james-clapper-unmasking-us-citizens/

    TW: Breitbart.

    1. Hyperion

      These people have been trained to lie and when they do, there are no consequences. Hillary practically wrote the book. Nixon could have totally gotten away today with far worse than what he did.

      1. grrizzly

        The first weekend after the presidential election last year I went to the Richard Nixon Presidential Library in Orange County. I felt a bit bad for Nixon — had Clinton won, Nixon would not have been considered any longer the most corrupt/dishonest President in modern history. Naturally there was an exhibition hall there devoted to Watergate. It’s crazy, the whole Watergate thing was so amateur and insignificant compared with the standard operating procedure in the Obama Administration. Back then Attorney Generals actually resigned instead of doing what the President told them. The comparison to modern times was not flattering.

    2. one true athena

      good lord, could Clapper look more like a Bond villain?

      1. Gilmore

        +1 White Persian Cat + Scar

  21. Viking1865

    Alright, I am halfway through the second chapter of Shattered. It’s so rich it is fattening. The 1st chapter alone includes this awesome bit:

    “Though some of Hillary’s aides were both competent and loyal, the candidate favored the latter over the former”

    Later on, we learn that Hillary actually had loyalty scores for various politicians and other figures. Like a literal list of people with a number indicating their loyalty to her. Which is not Nixonian at all, because shut up you sexist pig.

    1. Badolph Hilter

      I really do need to make time to read it.

      The one set of dots that I don’t usually see people connecting in terms of other on-line reviews and comments (maybe the book itself makes this point) is how much the whole thing undercuts her alleged leadership skills and experience. I’ve seen quote in other reviews from the book along the lines of (paraphrasing) “nobody was ever really clear what everyone’s responsibilities were, so they were constantly jockeying for position”.

      Reading that, can anyone imagine that her staff had she been elected would be any different?

      These are the hallmarks of a leader who would create a *completely* dysfunctional organization.

      Naturally, the vast majority of her supporters also don’t understand leadership, can’t see this at all, and wouldn’t be interested in hearing it even if you spelled it out for them.

      1. Viking1865

        Yep, that jumps right out to me.

        There’s an enormous difference between commanding and leading. It doesn’t shock me at all, but then I have disliked the women since I was 8 years old.

      2. Floridaman

        She had her subordinates fighting each other for position, I see she went through the Hitler school of leadership.

  22. Hyperion

    I started reading the weirdest dystopian novel named ‘Borne’ by Jeff VanderMeer. It’s about a company that created a lot of biotech and it got out of control. Not sure if I would recommend it yet. But definitely not for anyone who is easily creeped the fuck out.

    1. Worker and Parasite

      I haven’t read that one yet (I saw some reviews that put it in a glowing SJW light that I didn’t like), but I’m a big fan of his stuff overall.

      1. Hyperion

        From what I’ve read so far, there is nothing SJW in there.

  23. Gilmore

    Panopticon too-Panopticony = New York jail watchdog stripped of duties for spying on investigators

    New York City’s Department of Correction watchdog was relieved of his investigative duties on Monday after he was accused of directing surveillance of telephone calls by informants about the city’s troubled Rikers Island jail complex.

    Correction staff improperly listened in on calls between confidential Rikers informants and inspectors from the New York City Department of Investigation (DOI), Mark Peters, the DOI’s commissioner, said on Monday.

    The DOI is essentially the city’s inspector general, with independent oversight over city agencies including the Department of Correction.

    Spying took place under the direction of Correction Deputy Commissioner Gregory Kuczinski, Peters said. Surveillance continued under Kuczinski’s watch even after written orders that it end, he said.

    Who watches the watchers watching the watcher? etc etc etc.

  24. mexican sharpshooter

    So, I’m done with my house in CO. After a weekend spent painitng, “rebuilding” the deck, some electrical work and a bit of landscaping, it should be listed by the end of the week. Since I will be taking advantage of the //cue scary music// tax loophole on capital gains from the sale of real-estate //more scary music// my first purchase will be a top hat.

    I am now enjoying my 4 hour layover in Denver getting wasted at the airport.

    1. Worker and Parasite

      You sold property in Colorado to live in Phoenix? That seems… backwards.

      1. mexican sharpshooter

        I’m from Phoenix, I moved back home three years ago. I only moved to Colorado Springs because the Air Force put me there. I’m just cashing in on everyone moving in for legalish weed.

        And its not backwards, have you ever been to a gun shop in CO? It’s depressing, like watching gorrillas in a zoo. They know they’re more powerful than the thing that holds them back, but something is keeping them there. Is it food? comfort? No, its their conscience. So they just stare at what could be.

        Thus, I now reside in Phoenix.

      2. Vhyrus

        What part is backwards? The not dealing with freezing cold and snow, or the not dealing with wing nut progs every 10 feet?

        I’ll make sure to tell all the Colorado license plates I see in Mesa starting in October that they’re doing it wrong.

        1. westernsloper

          You guys hurt me.

          1. Vhyrus

            I am actually a former western sloper so I speak from experience, although the people to west of Aspen don’t have their head nearly as far up their ass as the rest of the state.

          2. mexican sharpshooter

            I actually miss the wintr.

            But in all fairness, and I hate to play the #notall card but, in this case its a fair argument. Almost everyone I met outside the Denver-Boulder-Ft. collins triangle of derp wasn’t a lefty retard. Unless of course your talking about ski towns, and quite frankly most ski town are populated by Tom Cruise, so I barely count them as anything. A single population center can fuck up an entire state.

          3. westernsloper

            To both of you, ya, ski towns are lost. The front range is lost. The real Western Slope is still good people. The front range and ski towns have kind of messed up politics/policy here.

          4. mexican sharpshooter

            Are you counting Colorado Springs in the fromt range? Because Colorado Springs is a SoCon happy land.

          5. westernsloper

            Co Springs is lost on its own merits. Ya it is SoCon over the top. I will take a SoCon over a Marxist any day. I know how to talk to SoCons. They have their beliefs, but in their heart they are not authoritarians because the God they worship, and or claim to worship is not one. As I said above. Free Will Yo. That and throw the constitution at them, and they will eventually regretfully agree with you.

        2. It may get up to 425 degrees in Phoenix, but at least it’s a dry heat.

    2. westernsloper

      I meant to say after your last question about DIA. If you are in the United wing of things, go to Elways. Best food in an airport I have ever had. I recommend the Calamari, and or the Burger. Spendy but worth it. Professional bartenders and good food. The one time I ate at a table was a letdown, but the bartenders are top notch, so eat at the bar if you can.

      1. mexican sharpshooter

        Well shit, I just walked by it since I hate Broncos fans for pertetuating Tewbowmania. I just filled up at the New Belgium bar. The food sucks but the Fench Oak Saison was really good. Particularly in light of Le Pen’s defeat this weekend. The epic pant shitting from that would be most entertaining, now I’m stuck looking at all the freaks traveling to Oxnard.

        But its a long layover so I may saunter on back…

        1. mexican sharpshooter

          *Tebowmania. You have to excuse me, I am no longer used to binge drinking at this elevation. I’m really using this Apple auto correct software as a crutch.

      2. mexican sharpshooter

        There is a line outside of Elway’s. So I picked a neaby competitor who has Left Hand Milk Stout on tap. I stand behind by decision.

        1. westernsloper

          Elways was way over my low brow usual digs, but seriously the food is good. I would honestly say the best food I have had in any airport the world over. Granted I have not been to every restaurant in every airport, but I traveled every two months through numerous airports from the US to Europe to the middle east, to Australia, to the SE Asia for about ten years, and still, Elways had the best food. Why do you think there is a line? Walk down the left side of the line along the tables and ask a waitress near the bar area if there is a seat at the bar. Buck up butter cup.

          1. mexican sharpshooter

            “Why do you think there is a line?”

            Broncos fans.

            Chill out Choir Boy. I didn’t say I wasnt going back. I just don’t want to wait in line.

          2. westernsloper

            I am not an Elway choir boy. *hallowed be his name* If the line is too long, go North on the concourse to the hot dog place. I don’t remember the name. Weird hotdogs and weird beers which is as good as anything in my book. Usually weird people too has been my experience which always makes it interesting.

          3. westernsloper

            wow, and edit feature would help that there.

          4. westernsloper

            That was a reply to my dumb sentence structure after I read it.

          5. mexican sharpshooter

            Its cool. I’m paying little attention to punctuation at this point. For my next trick, Im going to toss back this double IPA to the dismay of this hipster douche next to me.

          6. mexican sharpshooter

            Okay, you win. This martini is pretty good.

          7. westernsloper

            At the hot dog bar? or Elway’s?

          8. mexican sharpshooter

            Elways. I left because I got annoyed by an Austrian dude working his way up some middle age broad’s yoga pants.

  25. hayeksplosives

    Give this Arkansas woman a medal, not a fine or jail time.

  26. quincy

    Are older USB SD card readers unable to read 32GB SD cards. Or is some other kind of techfuckery going on?

    1. Vhyrus

      If the newer cards are USB 3.0 then there is a chance they won’t work. There was some limit on the size that older machines could read (either 8 or 16 gigs usually)

      1. quincy

        Thanks for the info.

        Good news! I don’t have to fuck around with Photoshop tonight. Bad news, I’m lugging my iMac to work to fuck around with Photoshop tomorrow morning. Fuck you, USB. Universal my ass. And SD, suck it.

        1. It was universal at one time….

          1. quincy

            A, B, micro B, now apparently micro-micro B. 2.0, 3.0. They just had to go out they’re way to fuck it up.

          2. quincy

            Their. Easy, Ted, my rage got in the way of correct apostrophe use.

    2. Fatty Bolger

      How old? The original SD spec only worked up to 2GB. SDHC should work up to 32GB.

      1. quincy

        No idea, but it’s the SD card reader I got, and it’s not working. A new one costs ten dollars at Amazon, but it’s two days away. I could drive to Staples, but i’ve been drinking. I need my data now!

  27. Ayn Random Variation

    So my old ass is sitting at the bar and I make eye contact with this cute young thing and OMGZ!!! Not only do I get 5he biggest eye roll of all time, but she calls for a manager. I’m a regular here so we had a good laugh.
    I wonder if I just raped her?

    1. Ayn Random Variation

      I mean, I wonder if I know qualify as a 1 in 4 rapist.
      I swear officer I didn’t get within 10 feet of her.

      1. Ayn Random Variation

        Now

        1. mexican sharpshooter

          You better get in touch with a lawyer. May I suggest whoever STEVE SMITH keeps on retainer?

          1. Vhyrus

            His workload is already maxed out.

          2. mexican sharpshooter

            His business is good for business and BUSINESS IS GOOD

          3. Agent Cooper

            STEVE SMITH KEEP LAWYER ON RAPETAINER!

      2. I swear officer I didn’t get within 10 feet of her.

        You just admitted how poorly endowed you are. :-p

    2. Ayn Random Variation

      Lmao she apparently called her hipster friend to protect her. I’m not making this up. This 120 pound guy is now giving me the death state. How do I get out of this without ending up in jail.

      1. Ayn Random Variation

        Fuck it I’m going back to the hood where I belong. These hipsters have ruined downtown jersey city.

        1. Vhyrus

          I’m pretty sure it was wrecked way before they got there.

        2. I didn’t know even hipsters could make Jersey City worse.

          Ha ha just kidding!

        3. mexican sharpshooter

          I gotta be honest here, there may be no advice to give you that in any way can be considered constructive.

          1. You’re saying it wouldn’t be constructive to expose yourself to the woman and say “your loss, babe, here’s what you’re missing”?

          2. mexican sharpshooter

            I stand corrected.

          3. Col. Chestbridge

            That’s never stopped us before!

          4. westernsloper

            Exactly! I say unless you need to be there to make money: Avoid assholes, hipster douches, over-reactive idiotic women and all other human life forms.

          5. Ayn Random Variation

            Thanks for not disappointing guys. My younger self would have snapped the hipster in half. But now I’m safely ensconced in journal square.

        4. Agent Cooper

          Eye contact is literally violence.

      2. Agent Cooper

        Just give her the Joey Bosa shrug.

  28. KibbledKristen

    If I click an option on this poll, I’ll automatically be shown the results. And I really, really don’t want to see the results.

    1. Prediction: it will be dismaying.

      1. KibbledKristen

        Prediction? Pain.

        1. Col. Chestbridge

          Prediction? You’ll need some healthcare afterward.

        2. Ayn Random Variation

          #1 clubbers lang

          1. Ayn Random Variation

            Clubber

    2. Ayn Random Variation

      Yeah you don’t want to go down that road. I recommend mass quantities of Jameson and weed if u do for there.

    3. mexican sharpshooter

      Its a product. A motherfucking product! You pieces of monkey shit, its a product not a right!

      1. mexican sharpshooter

        Sorry, I blame westernsloper. That John Elway sells good martinis.

        1. westernsloper

          *hollowed be his name*

    4. Agent Cooper

      Commodity is not listed.