Author: Brett L

It looks like the Road Warrior on my FB feed. I haven’t sawn off my shotgun just yet, but I am getting the bunker ready. Everyone in Florida stay safe. The rest of you Glibs go do something appropriately stupid and dangerous for us this weekend. I’m sure there will be some epic Florida Man stories to come out of this one. Hopefully, the funny and slightly painful, not the all-time Darwin Award winning. Let’s do… the links!

Is there nothing Hollywood won’t chew up and spit out an inferior version of? The musical was bad enough, but for fuck’s sake? These people are the new Heathers? Not a one could carry Heather Chandler’s jock-strap.

A small reminder that Floridian aren’t the only ones suffering. (Not a Patriots link)

Latest Fox News report on Great Korea. I was 90% certain they got confused by DPRK News Service, but apparently not. So sexist to only call a female politician a “political prostitute”.

They say music makes sex better. They’ve never accidentally left their whole music library on random during sex.

Should I go with the stupidly obvious, or just pretty obvious, or the old, tired standard?

With disaster porn completely consuming the news cycle, now is the time for us to stage a coup in a small nation and declare Glibertopia open for business! Or we could get ready to help our fellows as best we can over the next week or so. You make the call. We also have robc’s football guide coming later today. My beloved team(s) both underperformed last week by… a lot. I expect tonight’s guide will not be kind to them. And rightly so! Let’s us proceed to… the links!

Swedes find well preserved flag ship right where they buried it. They just forgot they where that was.

I have had the interview this is making fun of. Several times. “We need someone with three years experience on a technology that was released last year” is my other favorite.

I can’t tell whether this is a paranoid schizophrenic medication non-compliance episode or just a bunch of utter bullshit. What I can tell is that if this is the best the Bannonites have to strike back against the Generals with, the coup is over.

Amazon is literally going rent-seeking for its 2nd US Headquarters building. 

In what I assume is a Filipino take on both nepotism and public-private partnership, Duterte’s son has been linked to a $125M drug shipment. “What is good in life? Duterte?” “To murder the competitors of your children. To see innocent people executed so your son can get dictator rich. To hear the lamentations of drug warriors worldwide as they scream in betrayal.”

I was listening to way more depressing music. This one is kind of weird. But fun.

People in my state are freaking out. I give the people on the east coast south of Orlando a pass. They need to be prepped or out by Friday afternoon. On the other hand, Tallahassee appears to be all out of water. The storm won’t be there for a week if at all. Me, I’ve got a swimming pool with a chlorinator and a Britta pitcher. I’m good on drinking water. There were also plywood runs up here in St. Pete this weekend, which, I guess if you have to work until Friday night might be okay. I miss the days where we Floridians treated hurricanes like city pigeons treat a bus. We’ll move, but not one second earlier or one inch further than necessary. Oh, and by the way, since our governor went and declared a state of emergency for the whole state, companies can’t materially raise prices for supplies. So when that dickbag in front of you buys the last 80 bags of ice, thank the idiot price gouging laws. Rant complete. And now… the links!

Wow. Talk about the best investment ever. Tillman Fertitta will buy the Houston Rockets for $2.2 BILLION. His losing bid in 1993 was $4 MILLION short of Les Alexander’s $85M. Granted, Tillman is also buying the Toyota Center and not the broke down old Summit. But damn.

I have been drinking cough syrup all weekend and I didn’t try to kill my wife once.

Lego is laying off a bunch of people, seriously Danish unemployment went up by like a whole percent.

Politicians should be excluded from this trial of medicines that clear senescent cells from the body, lest they lose the entirety of their forebrains.

This song may just be NSFW. Sorry, I needed something to clear my palette of that cotton candy this morning.

Goooooood Morning, Gliber-nam! Hope everyone is having a wonderful friday. My kids slept an hour late and later I will help my brother load up for Colorado. So that will be good. I’ll have a reason to go out there and he has friends in The Industry. In SPORTZBALL, the Astros just acquired Justin Verlander, signalling that they will not be happy with a cursory appearance in the ALCS, and picked up a win at the Trop. White Sox and Orioles lose, Twins and Cubbies win. Oh, and there’s some foosball game in Atlanta this weekend. And Sloopy’s team managed to pull away from the class of the B1G last night. Way to stomp on Indiana. And now…. the links!

Judge orders FBI to release uncensored documents in relation to the Clinton email probe. We’ll see whether this is more stake to the heart or more tempest in teapot. Information that would have been valuable to Americans choosing their government LAST YEAR.

Journalists reflect on perhaps developing ethics after being shamed on live TV, decide that their careers are more important

Milwaukee Sheriff David Clarke resigns without explanation. I’m thinking live boy/dead girl (hey, its homophobic to hold people to different standards, but it happens). Alternative theories include Clarke being Obergruppenfurher of the new Southeast Texas Federal Rehabilitation Region. (Not really, I just made that up)

Never let a crisis go to waste. Car makers in Britain are trying their own “Cash for Clunkers” scrappage deals. A private solution, you say, its fine you say. Oh look here at the end…”It comes as tougher emissions tests begin to be rolled out across the European Union on Friday.” Ahhh. So much more subtle than us Americans.

Today we will play the Theme Song. And an uplilfting message from a Texas band.

Happy Wednesday everyone. I’ve got a kid home sick and I’m even less productive than usual. In Sportzball, the Astros-Rangers series is being held in my neighborhood. The Astros may have been a little distracted last night, losing 12-2. Hoping to take the wife and kids (he’s not THAT sick) to the game tonight. Tickets are only $10 and the Rays are donating all tickets, concessions, and parking to Houston relief efforts — so good on ’em. For my own sake, I hope the Astros never get to repay the favor. The NFL version of the Dallas-Houston rivalry, scheduled for tomorrow, has been cancelled. Which, preseason game, so whatever. And now… the links!

One can only imagine how badly the internal polling is going for Antifa when Nancy Pelosi and the mayor of Berkeley have started talking about violent gangs on both sides. Or maybe they’re just dogwhistling to all those Democrats in the Klan. I can’t keep up with the narrative. (Acknowledgements to beloved commenter Chipwooder, who I see had this same thought at 9am this morning. I’m still not taking this down.)

Wow, you’ll all be shocked to find out that Bill Nye is pitching what appears to be a huge solar scam. To be generous, I assume he is just the first sucker and not actively participating in creating a corporate structure no one should ever put money into unless they’re in a Brewster’s Millions type scenario.

And Pope Jimbo, I gotta know, what the hell is an “ax-like tool“?

Someone’s not getting shit for his 12th birthday.

It’s weird how the GDP revisions go in one direction for Democratic presidents and the other for Republicans. Not to worry, though, there’s gonna be lots of broken windows to fix in the Houston area for the next year.

A little cheer-me-up for your Wednesday.

Morning all, last we heard from Sloopy he was fine, but wiped out from voluntarily helping his neighbors deal with a natural disaster that has now reached biblical proportions. There’s some dude in eastern Harris County that thinks he should have listened to that voice in his head last time he went off his meds saying he should build a big-ass boat… and sleep with his daughter.

Sportzball — The Detroit Lions will pay Matthew Stafford a bunch of money to continue to put up huge numbers but never buy him the support to win the big games. Cubbies and Orioles won, Yankees lost. LA and Houston did not play. JJ Watt continues to be a good face for the NFL, and the Rockets and Astros ownership put up some money. Also, some doper is back in women’s tennis and all over the news. And now …the links!

Trump gets a qualified okay on hurricane response from a major daily. Meanwhile, Time joins the list of journalistic publications pretending like there’s a city in America that can absorb 30-50 inches of rain in 3-4 days. It must be sprawl and glubal warmink! Dear Houston, you’ve been the fastest growing major city in America in the 21st century for a reason. Don’t listen to the haters.

In much, much lighter news, every punk eventually grows old. (Yes, I saw the date, but I needed the chuckle)

Russkies and Chinese joint naval maneuvers? Don’t they have 1 functional carrier between them? I’m sure the pearl clutching will commence apace for 3-5 more aircraft carriers.

Everyone will be surprised that Marines whose tattoos were fine in Afghanistan and Iraq are being barred from re-enlistment coincidental with a 10% active duty force reduction.

Woman uses experimental method to determine if pistol her son found is real, no one injured. Please teach your children gun safety, if only so they can tell mom what a really bad idea that is.

This one’s for Sloopy.

I keep hearing, “I’ve got Ocean Front property in Western Houston”. So inapropes.

Its a rare day when I’m don’t miss living in Houston at least a little bit. Today is one of them. If Noah had come from Texas, a hell of a lot more people than just his family would have survived. The good news is, very few lives are lost. The bad news is, probably a million people will be economically destroyed. I’ll start looking into emerging voluntarism opportunities to help or fund. Maybe at the end of the week, when we (hopefully) know what it all is going to look like.

UPDATE: Texas Monthly has a starter list here. I did a preliminary vetting of the charity Global Giving mentioned and it appears to be quite reputable.

Onto the links!

Good news, everyone, I’m going to live forever! Actually, I’m probably down to 2-3 from 6+. So maybe I need to raise my game.

Expect gas prices to go up at least 10% until Houston gets back to work. Maybe, just maybe, enviroweenies, we should move some of our eggs out of that basket.

Headlines that surprise no one: California considers taxing _____ .

Uber picks a Persian CEO. No racist jokes about knowing the taxi industry!

More evidence that when the robot uprising occurs, it’ll be because some disaffected 16-year old with no friends decides to hack all robots to kill all humans.

A Houston boy covering an appropriate song. Serious question, how do I get the job as the background trombone player?

I really should have done more than refactor a bunch of code today. But it will make my life easier, soo… yeah.

Kevin D. Williams continues to be more libertarian than half the so-called libertarian organizations.

This sounds like a fun way to die

Is there anything less impressive than an acrostic from a grown-ass person? Congratulations, but nobody actually read the letter.

This right here is why I don’t want Trump impeached.

Sloopy and Banjos, seriously, head for higher ground. I went through this twice. Tomorrow’s song today.

And today’s song