Reviews You’ll Never Use: The Boy
The Boy 2015, that is. Confusingly, there was also a horror movie by this name made in 2016, about a doll. Don’t mix them up.
Read MoreAuthor: Gojira
Reviews You’ll Never Use: Class of 1999 II: The Substitute
Hello my macabre menagerie of malcontents, and welcome once again to the only thing on the...
Read MoreReviews You’ll Never Use: Class of 1999
This week, we’ll do something a bit unusual, and review a sequel to a film instead of the original. Why? Tune in to find out.
Read MoreReviews You’ll Never Use: The Battle Wizard
I must profess to having a soft place in my heart for old trashy kung fu movies. Those of you my age or a bit older probably remember these as being staples on late-night cable, when they were just trying to fill air space. The silly dubbing, ham-fisted acting, convoluted story lines, and most importantly, the high-flying martial arts action are ambrosia for the aficionado of trash cinema.
Read MoreReviews You’ll Never Use: Texas Frightmare Weekend
Prepare yourselves (and your bodies) for a thorough review of Texas Frightmare Weekend! I mean, I guess you can try, but you’ll never really be ready.
Read MoreReviews You’ll Never Use: Beyond the Darkness
The Final Girl–I mean, Giallo installment from Gojira.
Read MoreReviews You’ll Never Use: Suspiria
Greetings once again, my fellow travelers in the transgressive, to another installment of Reviews...
Read MoreReviews You’ll Never Use: Zombi 2. Or is it Zombie? It’s Both!
Greetings fellow marvelers of the menacing and macabre, and welcome to another installment of what is indisputably at least the eighth best weekly recurring article on this site. For the next several weeks, we shall be exploring...
Read MoreReviews You’ll Never Use: The Monster Squad
Greetings Boils and Ghouls, and whatever other gender you may be currently identifying as. For the...
Read MoreReviews You’ll Never Use: Gargoyles (1972)
How many pube cartoons did Gojira rate this film? I’m sure you’re tingling with anticipation to find out. If not, hopefully you’re at least tingling with drugs or alcohol. You aren’t? You pussy.
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