After the last couple of weeks at work, sometimes I wonder about the wisdom of my career choices. But I never wonder about YOU, our loyal and highly perverted crew. So that’s what drives me to get up before the crack of dawn on weekends and compile stories that I hope will stimulate, titillate, asseverate, and infuriate, accompanied by Borscht Belt-style one-liner.
And we have a decent crop to work with today.
Every day, I read the latest story about how THIS TIME, this is the end of the Trump administration. Yeah, yeah, we said the same thing yesterday, but THIS TIME is the real one where he has to vacate the White House and somehow turn it over to Clinton or something. Well, THIS TIME is the thing that will do it– when towering and respected intellects of this order speak, the revolution is certainly here.
If you needed proof of the antisemitism that permeates the White House, look no further. I’m sure they’re already building the ovens.
“I give all the credit to my old friend vodka,” Bowen said.
I would also likely do this if somehow I were ever actually allowed to be on a jury.
Berman noted that the juror said during the jury selection process prior to the start of opening statements this week that in his spare time he likes to sleep.
OK, that was the sugar, now the medicine: Old Guy Music! I make no secret about my deep admiration for Peter Green, the (((guy))) who was the core of Fleetwood Mac when they were still good. And I love Leo Kottke. Kottke’s collaborations with Mike Gordon from Phish are the reasons that bongs were invented. Now let’s put it all together!
STEVE SMITH FLATTERED BY FUNNY GLIBERTARIAN PEOPLE HAVING MERCH FEATURING STEVE SMITH. STEVE SMITH AVAILABLE TO AUTOGRAPH SELECT PIECES. BY AUTOGRAPH, MEAN RAPE. IMAGINE PRIDE YOU FEEL WHEN TELL PEOPLE – “STEVE SMITH RAPED THAT STEIN AND THAT BASEBALL JERSEY!”
STEVE SMITH DON’T ALWAYS DRINK BEER…STEVE SMITH ONLY RAPE XL AND ABOVE…
BUT ENOUGH ABOUT STEVE SMITH. FUNNY GLIBERTARIAN PEOPLE COME HERE FOR LINKS!
HERE ARE LINKS FOR FUNNY GLIBERTARIAN PEOPLE TO MAKE FUNNY REMARKS ABOUT. STEVE SMITH GO LOOK AT LIST OF STEVE SMITH MERCH AND MAYBE ORDER A 5XL SHIRT.
LOOK LIKE NO MORE SYRIA TALK. STEVE SMITH NOTICE “The UN has said it will cost at least $250 billion to rebuild the country.” STEVE SMITH WONDER WHERE THEY GET MONEY? MAYBE SYRIA CAN SELL MERCH THAT SAY FUNNY SYRIAN THINGS, OR HAS SYRIA FLAG ON IT!
STEVE SMITH THINK THIS MAN NO MUCH LIKE WHAT GO ON IN STATE OF MASSACHUSETTS.
STEVE SMITH WONDER WHO ELSE RECRUIT IN GERMANY? DO FUNNY GLIBERTARIAN PEOPLE KNOW?
STEVE SMITH NOT EASILY SHOCKED (SOMETIMES HIKERS TRY TASER – IT TICKLE) BUT IS VERY SHOCKED TO HEAR POLITICIAN LIED!!! STEVE SMITH GO LAY DOWN FOR WHILE NOW.
I was going to do a theme for today’s links. But I ended up stumped. So you get a lovely potpourri of links! … OK, how about a mess of unrelated links? Yeah…that is more honest. But, whatever you call them, here they are for your enjoyment, ignoring or whatnot.
A heartwarming story of “team” for the holiday season!
Admit it…you ARE going to click on a story headlined “YouTube singer’s teenage gang of skull-masked moped robbers are jailed for 13 years for targeting commuters in string of knife-point thefts” aren’t you?
NOTE: I didn’t put any links to Flynn-a-palooza, since I am observing the 48 hour rule. But feel free to bat the story around in the comments, should you desire.
SUPER BONUS FEATURE!!!! BECAUSE YOU DEMANDED IT! STEVE SMITH GEAR.
Tiger shot -3 in his return to golf. I guess the ankle bracelet didn’t have an effect on his swing, but that interlock device on the cart sure is a bitch. In college basketball, Michigan State continues to impress with a win over Notre Dame. aTm also won. Seattle destroyed Houston 3-0 to win both legs of their MLS Cup semifinal with ease. They take on Toronto in a couple of weeks. The usual suspects all went through in the Spanish Copa del Rey.
There was plenty of action on the ice with seven games last night. The results: The Kings royally screwed the Crapitals. Dilly dilly! Les Canadiens throttled the Red Wings. The MINNESODA WIIIIIIIIIILLLLLDDDD doubled up the Army, er Las Vegas Golden Knights. The Canucks took down the Predators.* The Blackhawks fell to the Stars in OT (sorry, Swissy). The Flames consumed the Coyotes. And the Maple Leafs bested the Oilers.
*I, for one, think its time the NHL looked at the insensitivity of the nickname “Predators” in this day and age of sexual assault becoming as commonplace as it is, especially in the media and political arenas. This is literally worse that the Redskins, Indiana and Hitler put together.
Tennessee football downgraded from dumpster fire to row of shitters on fire
And last but not least, the college football coaching search at Tennessee continues apace. The NC State coach turned them down yesterday but they are now talking to Mike Leach from Wazzu. He’d be a hell of a get for that dumpster fire. I sure hope he turns them down. Also, aTm says they’re about to make their move and Arizona State is going to make a splash by apparently hiring…Herm Edwards? I can’t think of anything that would get the boosters more fired up than a guy who last coached 9 years ago…in the NFL…with little success. Also Conference Championship games all day tomorrow. Go Bucks! Beat Michigan! Beat Wisconsin! (Also Go Miami in the ACC and Go SMOD in the SEC game. Go TCU! And I don’t care who wins the Pac 12 game. Oh, and Go Boise State. Because Fresno being ranked with three losses was a fucking joke and a deliberate attempt to make Bama’s schedule look more impressive.)
Jeez. I meant for that to be a very short sports update and then I went on a rant. Sorry about that. I’ll try to make it up to you by doing extra good with…the links!
Apparently NOT a murder victim, but a victim of bad luck according to San Franciscans.
I seriously don’t like linking all bad news, but I can’t avoid bringing up the acquittal of the illegal alien, multiple felon who killed Kate Steinle in San Francisco. The “it went off on its own” defense seemed to have worked. Even though Sig Sauer’s aren’t known for ever doing that. Even though what the fuck was he doing with the gun anyway? And why would he have been pointing it anywhere in the first place? Seriously…fuck that shit. Oh yeah, he’s being deported now. But I’m sure he can find a way back, with a new stolen identity, and make his way to another sanctuary city.
I didn’t even know Argentina had submarines. Are they planning on invading another British territory or something? Anyway, this is very sad. But seriously, Argentina? Submarines?
Nothing special going on in my world today. How’s yours? I mean, if you’re a Vols fan, it must hurt to get relegated to Vandy status. The coach at NC State doesn’t want the job either.
In today’s on-going fallout from perv-land, Pelosi calls on Conyers to resign — so he checks into the hospital. Republican Joe Barton has decided to retire over dick pics.
Maverick has once again deigned Republicans worthy of his support after they kissed his ass enough to make him feel special. We will see if his undecided mini-me junior senator will tag along with daddy.
Interesting climate science. I have some quibbles, but its probably me not them.
LaVar Ball said his doesn’t think Steph Curry is better than his son after the Lakers fall to the Warriors in OT. ::SMDH::
In college ball, ranked Miami (FL) fell to Minnesota. The other ranked teams all won, including Duke, Bama, UNC, Villanova, Gonzaga and TCU.
In soccer, there were no upsets yesterday, as Arsenal, Chelsea (barely), Liverpool, Burnley and Man Shitty (also barely) all won. And so did Everton…by 4 goals. Which drags them back to mid-table instead of flirting with the drop zone. Toronto beat Columbus to advance to the MLS Cup Final as well and will face whoever prevails after tonight’s second leg between Houston and Seattle. Seattle is up 2-0 after the first leg so…yeah, expect them to go through.
Only four games in the NHL last night. The Bruins took down the Lightning. The Anaheim Mighty Ducks topped the Blues. Les Canadiens ousted the Senators. And the Avalanche buried the Jets, although it was in OT so the pun really doesn’t work.
Yeah, that’s about it. Although I wanted to note that professional sports, where people compete on the basis of skill and they can’t as easily reach the highest levels by manipulation and exchanging favors for advancement, has largely been immune from the sex assault/harassment scandal that is engulfing the political and entertainment worlds, which are two “industries” where its more who you know (or blow) than what you know. So good on the sports world, with the exception of the kiddy diddler gymnastics doctor who I hope burns in hell. I hope the trend continues.
Anyway, enough about sticks and balls and pucks and shit. Let’s get right into…the links!
Just in case you didn’t get the news yesterday, The Glibertarians Swag Store is officially open for business. So get in there and get those Christmas presents bought for your loved ones! In all seriousness, the logo really does look good on merchandise.
Swapping stories that would make STEVE SMITH blush
The Matt Lauer thing is exposing a lot more than Lauer’s sexual predatorily behavior. Its exposing a culture at NBC that was allowed to persist to keep a “star” happy. You can’t tell me that nobody knew about his door-locking button under his desk or his reputation for grabbing asses or summoning women to his office who had no reason to otherwise be there. And yes, there is some personal responsibility to be borne by the women who are now coming out, some still anonymously, and fingering him for things that allegedly happened years and years ago. They enabled the continuation of the rapey and pervy behavior that he’s been accused of by staying silent. But the brass at NBC are the biggest enablers at all by not investigating and firing every single person found to have put their hands on someone against their will. Its called common decency, and it exists in the real world where people are judged on their merits and decency as opposed to how many eyeballs they can get to watch your network between certain hours. Shame on NBC and all the other networks which apparently includes the CW now for putting ratings and accommodating your stars above the physical well-being of your lower staffers and guests. I hope this buries you in a pile of your own shit.
Terry McAuliffe, in an interview that ignores his being sued for scamming a Chinese company, is angling for a 2020 run for the White House. God help us if that slimy, Clintonista piece of shit wins.
What has two thumbs and apparently likes to scam Chinese automakers?
Chicago police making up shit about a shooting. I know. I’m as shocked as you are. Which means I’m not the least bit surprised and will continue to not be surprised as these cops walk and continue to get paid until they stop getting paid and instead get pensions funded by taxpayers for basically being above the law.
I just saw the trailer for the latest Avengers flick, and at one point there are two giant armies running across a wide-open field intending to close with each other and fight with hand weapons. For some reason I guess I’ve just had enough of CGI armies. My eyes rolled so hard I got a good look at my own brain. We humans solved this problem some time around 1915. Gas, nukes, napalm, mines, two or three of those AC-130s that have a fucking minigun on one side and a large bore gun on the other. The enemy monster army is packed together like a Greek phalanx. WTF? I don’t mean to be racist, but if that’s the Black Panther’s idea of martial strategy, he’s not a very good general or king. Tony Stark owns or owned an arms company. If ever there was no excuse in the back story for this stupid, stupid, set piece, its right here!
In better news, Glibertarians.com finally got its shit together and made a Cafe Press store. If we promised you some merchandise, please email and remind us. Big thanks to SugarFree for MGGA!
If those were my kids, I’d play dead, too
If you would with either of these, you need to get your Hot/Crazy gauge recalibrated
This person wants the Internets regulated good and hard because… and this is the actual argument… “the tech giants have usurped the role of traditional news media—without assuming any historic social responsibilities”. Usurped. Responsibilities. Sure. In much the same way that the automobile usurped horses for local transportation of goods.
If I was a locked-in patient and they put this thing on my head, it would just be this.
I know we have a couple of rocket scientists here… this NK rocket thing is still bothering me. How can you achieve a height of 2800 miles without achieving escape velocity? I’m just not able to brain how it got that high “slowly” enough to fall straight back down. Although I guess it probably doesn’t take that much fuel once you get over 100 miles up. Meh.
And now I’ll just go put on the whole album this is on, and think about how many times I heard that string tune-up at the beginning.
Any Bulls fans out there? What’s up with your boy Ben Gordon? Dude needs some meds, pronto! Eli Manning is about to take a seat. The coaching carousel in college football continues, as does the dumpster fire at Tennessee after Mike Gundy said “no thanks.” Curious thing about Tennessee and Gundy, is their lack of outrage about a coach who brought a convicted child sexual assaulter into his program. But their whole Schiano outrage was based on his tenuous at best (if you take seriously a third-hand account made a giant pussy trying to feel better about failing to stop a rape he personally saw) relationship to the Sandusky child sex abuse, right? Sure it was. Stay classy, and irrelevant, Tennessee football. All the way to hiring a local high school coach, if you’re lucky. The latest CFP poll came out last night. Bama 5 and Ohio State 8. With a pair of teams between them that will either win and get in or lose and drop out. So there’s basically nothing between them. And the committee said there was very little separating 5 through 8. What does that mean if the Buckeyes beat #4 Wisconsin? Who knows, but I’ll sure be pulling for TCU anyway.
Metaphor for the Tennessee football program
Across the pond, ManUre beat Watford in a wild one. WBA and Newcastle drew. As did Crystal Palace and Brighton. The big game was Leicester taking Spurs down 2-1 in a game that was nowhere near as close as the score indicates. More EPL games today, including Liverpool-Stoke and Everton-West Ham in a battle of basement dwellers.
Busy schedule in the NHL yesterday. The Lightning blanked the Sabres. Isles bested the Canucks. Sharks beat the Flyers. Panthers beat the Rangers. Blue Jackets over the Hurricanes in a shootout. The Kings thumped the Red Wings. The Leafs extinguished the Flames. The Dallas Stars beat the Army, I mean Vegas, Golden Knights. The Oilers greased the Coyotes in OT and the Blackhawks got back to their recent run of form in falling to the Predators.
Got it? Good. Moving on! And by on, you know I mean to…the links!
So Oceans 11 was full of shit. Apparently it is possible to simply walk up and rob casino. Still an enjoyable movie though.
A real rags to riches story. Of course, it helps when you literally have immunity from insider trading laws. Also, “left-leaning” might be a tad of an understatement.
And the latest big name in the sexual abuse scandal to drop is………Matt Lauer! Matt, come on down and see what you’ve won.
Perhaps Matt Lauer was taking Casual Fridays too far
Happy Tuesday — I’m back to work, but my kids are back to school, so I feel great! Today I am writing documentation, and I am still happy to be at work. MDMA is a helluva chemical.
Corrections officer — probably a relation of Payton Manning — arrested for sex with inmate. See left.
Turkeys Play Chicken with Trump over Spending. I hope they remain at an impasse.
OMWC disappointed. I want to know if this was a bug or if it just left “in the house” off the end. With two toddlers, “here’s a lollipop each, I have to go help mommy with something in the bedroom” works for the latter. I mean, so I am told. Or try this AI-created lullaby.
Florida girl, 17, goes missing at the same time as 27 year old soccer coach. I wonder if they can do anything if she says she wants to stay with the guy.
Penalties for that slap fight in Oakland are coming today. Who cares. The penultimate CFP poll comes out tonight. Also, Tennessee football is still a dumpster fire, after Cutcliffe (lol, seriously) and Witten say they have zero interest. Pretty soon, they’ll be dialing Lane Kiffen for that second chance. That’s when you know they’ve given up completely.
The hockey was pretty much it for entertainment yesterday. Penguins beat their cross-state rivals in overtime. The Panthers topped the Devils. Les Canadiens were better than the Blue Jackets. The Jets bombed the Minnesoda WIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLDDDD. And the Blackhawks put up a huge number in beating the “streaking” (but not really) Mighty Ducks.
No more sports. Here come…the links!
Do your job!
Thanks for nothing, assholes. Seriously, fuuuuuuuuuck yooooooooooooou! Go collectively (and metaphorically) jump in a woodchipper after this decision, which will enable assholes everywhere to go after this and other natural rights.
Tough shit, tax leeches. Its not only immoral but should be illegal to hold people a generation later financially responsible for piss-poor decisions made by crony politicians and the unions that financed their campaigns.
Go out there and enjoy the day. It’s Liberty Ordeth Cranberry Spicer’s 4th birthday today. My how time flies. (Hey, I have two 4 year olds that aren’t twins for the next few days!)
