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Well the Penguins righted the ship last night (sort of). The Celtics closed out the Bullets (finally). And Sharapova won her first match at a major after her return from her doping suspension (um, ok).  But this is not the day to dwell on sports news.  Oh nosiree! There’s enough craziness out there in the rest of the world that needs a mention.

So without further ado I give you…the links!

Investigator believes he may have the tie in between Wikileaks and the DNC. Unfortunately, the local cops already said his death was a botched robbery attempt.  Which would definitely explain why they or the FBI have his laptop.

If you want to know what equal protection under the law looks like, then look elsewhere. Because you sure as shit ain’t gonna find it by clicking through this link.

The left-media suicide pact explained pretty succinctly.

Louisiana House passes bill that would allow locals to decide whether or not to take down monuments. Leftists outraged.  Look, this is a contentious topic. And I’d like to see where you guys fall on it. So please discuss this in the comments. I have my own feelings on it. I’d like to see how they jibe with those of the the rest of you.

Derpa derpa derp. Da tum ta tidally derp. (I was at a loss how to properly introduce this steaming nugget.)

And if you thought that was derpy….baby, you ain’t seen nothing yet. (TW; Salon doing what they do best: being retarded as shit by thinking they’re hammering libertarianism.)

Sometimes the best solution is: do nothing.

Have a great day, friends.

Happy Monday, commentariat. I hope everyone sufficiently pleased the matronly persons in their lives yesterday. My wife did all her own shopping, so I’m pretty sure I hit it out of the park this year. Speaking of hitting it out of the park, how about that 2nd game at Yankee Stadium yesterday? Listen, its the Astros, you gotta celebrate in May or June, because there’s nothing good about September or October.

• Pvt. Manning will remain on active duty, but not be paid, while awaiting the result of appeal. (Here’s another BH link, which I don’t believe a word of, I just want to pat the poor helpless little Antifa losers in the picture on the head, and encourage them to find a clue)
• Get away from her you , bi… What do you mean this exoskeleton isn’t xenomorph queen rated? What about Walmart Black Friday woman? No?
• Russia warns against intimidating N. Korea. As if Russia is going to be in favor of anything that encourages Sino-US cooperation. They would warn against a joint US-Chinese mission to alter the course of SMOD.
• Sad little assholes, part II. All those torches, and not a single hood or cross. Even the white supremacists are losers these days.
• Anyone else think this revision of the Dinosaur Killer Asteroid’s nuclear winter to a lucky strike will fail to change a single mind about nuclear power? Or did we stop pretending fallout was a problem several decades ago? (Remember: More people died at Chappaquidick than Three Mile Island!)

And since I’m ending on down note, here’s a little bummer song that’s nonetheless fun.

Man, what a busy weekend. But rejoice all you Canadian hockey fans! And you Liverpool fans (YNWA!) I don’t know how long the glow from either victory will last, but I’m feeling a lot more solid on the latter than I am on the former. And the same goes for the Spurs.  Blowing a 25 point lead against the Warriors in Game 1 is not a good sign. Neither is losing your last healthy star.

Anyway, there’s a lot I’m sure you want to talk about, so let’s get on with it shall we?  Here are…the links!

Ever wondered how self-absorbed and full of shit IRS agents could really be?  Well wonder no more! Seriously, the gall on these two is beyond parodying.  (TW: You’re gonna want to bust some shit.)

Baltimore on pace to out-murder Chicago this year. If only those two wild west-like towns could institute some serious gun control, all would be well.  Oh, wait…

Victor Davis Hanson is back…and with a vengeance!

Yeah, yeah. We all know Chelsea Clinton used diverted funds from Haiti relief orgs to fund her wedding. But I found somebody that came up with a worse way to fund theirs.

Social Justice Warriors go apeshit when a black woman strays off the plantation on national TV. How dare she have an opinion of her own! She’s a woman. She’s supposed to be in lockstep with leftist retards.

Man, I need a fucking vacation.

ZARDOZ SPEAKS TO YOU, HIS CHOSEN ONES. SO, ON THE SUGGESTION OF COMMENTER BRUTALS, ZARDOZ INQUIRED ABOUT THE PLANT MATERIAL HE HAS BEEN DELIVERING. A RECIPIENT OF ONE OF HIS DELIVERIES BURNED SOME OF THE MATERIAL UNDERNEATH ZARDOZ’S NOSE. ZARDOZ LATER BECAME QUITE RELAXED. PUTTING TWO AND TWO TOGETHER, ZARDOZ NOW UNDERSTANDS THE USE OF THIS PLANT.

…

SAY, CHOSEN ONES, YOU WOULDN’T HAPPEN TO HAVE ANY OF THE PLANT MATTER TO BURN UNDER ZARDOZ’S NOSE, WOULD YOU? IF NOT, IT IS COOL. ZARDOZ UNDERSTANDS. IT IS JUST…WELL, HERE ARE LINKS FOR MY CHOSEN ONES.

• IF ZARDOZ COULD ROLL HIS EYES, HE WOULD DO SO.
• AND WOULD ALSO DO SO FOR THIS.
• OH, AND THIS TOO.
• FINALLY, THIS ONE DESERVES AN EYE ROLL TOO.

WHAT IS IT WITH YOU BRUTALS THIS WEEK? ZARDOZ REALLY DOES NEED SOME MORE OF THAT PLANT MATTER.

We’re on Day 127 in a row of the Trump presidency destroying itself. But despite 127 days in a row, with each day having the latest Outrage That Destroys The Trump Presidency, he still seems to be president, alas. Here’s yet another example of progressive breathlessness, a particularly funny one. And with a numbered list! That makes things much, much worse than Nixon! For whatever reason, I can’t help but think of the greatest cartoon character of all time, Screwball Squirrel, torturing Meathead.

At one time, my grandfather was the postmaster of Boring, Maryland. I thought you couldn’t do better than that, but the King of Rent Seekers has proved me wrong.

On a serious note, fun is fun, but let’s be honest: STEVE SMITH is a menace, and it’s no joke when you’re the victim.

Dear Penthouse Letters: I used to think you made those letters up, but let me tell you what happened to me…

Certainly one of us, but the only question is, what’s his handle here?

And last but not least, a link with no associated cartoon, though it ought to. A dog fetches a stick.

I am on kind of a Links run lately…so bear with me. Here are a few random ones for your Saturday Morning. I hope you all ran out and found all the ingredients for a nice Planet of the Apes or three.

• Hero, or soon to be treated like the British Richard Jewel?
• Again, I must ask “which one of you was this?”
• Stupid Hillbillies…hey, wait a minute??
• Honestly, I am getting tired of asking…which one of you was this?

Imma go get another mug of coffee. When I get back, hopefully at least one of you will have ignored all these links and posted your own, someone else will have posted one of these links, and several of you will have suggested names for the two links that ask who amongst you this was. Cheers!