Fuck Off Trolls

As you might have noticed, we here in Glibertaria have a zero tolerance policy when it comes to trolling.  You trolls out there might say to yourself “Reason never banhammered me?”  We are not Reason.

We will not hesitate to replace your trolling comments with pictures of cat buttholes for everyone to laugh at. Or to ban your ass without notice.

 

Comments

137 responses to “Fuck Off Trolls”

  1. WyoDave

    Worst chat room ever.

    1. Banjos

      *has a PTSD flashback*

    2. thrakkorzog

      I put on my robe and wizard hat.

      1. Gojira

        Hole-lee shit, you’re the first person I’ve ever seen outside of 4chan make that reference. Congrats, Blood Ninja.

        1. Nephilium

          Now I feel old, I recognize that from bash.

        2. Zero Sum Game

          Ha! My wife and I use that line all the time.

          The saga of bloodninja continues.

        3. What’s 4chan?

          1. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

            Assuming you believe the advertising copy, a discount outlet of Men’s Warehouse.

      2. +1 rhinoceruses don’t wear shirts

  2. BakedPenguin

    Semi-related to trolling: Missing Missy from 27B/6. I re-read it every few months, because it makes me laugh every time.

    1. Hmmm, maybe we could end up with the cat-butt version of that? “Missing Troll”…

      1. Zero Sum Game

        404 – Troll Not Found

        4 (cat butthole) 4 😛

        1. ⬆️so much win⬆️

        2. Download adobe reader?

    2. invisible furry hand

      I am laughing so hard I’m crying. THANK YOU BP!!!

      1. ifh!!!!!!!!!!!!

    3. DenverJ

      That is hilarious.

  3. Scruffy Nerfherder

    While I’m somewhat disappointed that we won’t get the visceral experience of arguing with tulpae while intoxicated, I guess I approve.

    1. Zero Sum Game

      Something managed to make its way through my viscera, but I think it was expunged back at TSTNBN.

  4. Tacit Rainbow

    I only think I’ve seen one cat ass so far. Are they coming in and necro-posting?

  5. bacon-magic

    Thall shall not suffer the trolls.

    1. Thou shalt not suffer a troll to post.

      1. bacon-magic

        Eddie,
        Is that you? I don’t see citations or none of that fancy book lernin’ scribbles.

        1. jesse.in.mb

          It’s from one of the lesser known works of St. Peter Damian. I doubt you’ve ever heard of him.

          1. bacon-magic

            Patron saint of parkour?

          2. Sour Kraut

            That’s Saint David la Belle

          3. Damian? That’s a bad omen.

        2. Bobarian LMD

          There are plenty of replies to himself.

  6. ZARDOZ

    ZARDOZ SPEAKS TO YOU, HIS CHOSEN ONES.

    ANY BRUTAL WHO TROLLS THE SITE SHALL BE CLEANSED! EXTERMINATORS ARE WAITING.

    1. Scruffy Nerfherder

      I only one question Zardoz. Where’s your mankini?

      1. That wasn’t the big talking head, that was Connery…and he had boots too!

        1. Scruffy Nerfherder

          The Servator is bringing’ the goods.

          Was that taken during your stint in Afghanistan?

          1. *readies cat butt… *

          2. Tundra

            These euphemisms are getting feline!

          3. Bobarian LMD

            Swissy has that hanging on his bedroom wall.

          4. Trigger Hippie

            Nah, he lifted it from SF’s blog.

        2. bacon-magic

          I garfunkled your mother, Trebek.

          /Sean

          1. Tundra

            I don’t care what the others say about you, bacon, you are one funny chunk of enchanted porkbelly.

          2. bacon-magic

            I’m not smart enough to follow along, so I jester.

    2. This Machine

      HAIL ZARDOZ

  7. I presume I shouldn’t ask who got banned this time., although I have a feeling I can guess.

    1. SP

      Just be content in the knowledge that it was not you. This time.

    2. BakedPenguin

      Ted, I don’t know if you still go to H&R at all, but Jesse Walker put up a piece about Dovzhenko. Also, if you have a Roku box, you might like this channel.

  8. This Machine

    Aw, man, I haven’t witnessed anyone get cat-butted yet. Except for that one links post with that guy who had that tattoo around his bellybutton. But that doesn’t count.

    1. ….

      *meow*

      1. This Machine

        *nervously backs away from Swiss*

        Good kitty. Nice kitty. Happy fluffy kitty.

        *turns and sprints away*

    2. jesse.in.mb

      We appreciate and share your interest in catbutt, TM, but we feel that overuse of a cat’s butt leads inexorably to a diminution of the pleasures gained from it.

      1. This Machine

        Hey, thanks. I just, y’know, it’s like one of those things you hear about that doesn’t sound pleasant at all, but the novelty of it makes you think, “Man, I really wish I coulda been there to see it.”

      2. R C Dean

        overuse of a cat’s butt leads inexorably to a diminution of the pleasures gained from it.

        That’s . . . not even a euphemism.

        1. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

          Wasn’t that an episode of South Park?

  9. Somalian Road Corporation

    I’m fine with this. I still wake up sometimes in the middle of the night, drenched in sweat and screaming, with a nightmare about White Indian’s thousand-year reign of terror writhing its way out of my mind.

    There are a number of other libertarian communities online where bad-faith trolls who have the time to post 14 hours a day, every single day, for years on end, can continue to play their reindeer games unabated.

    Also, DS9 was unquestionably the best Trek. I always find it amusing that when the Ferengi are the focus, I find myself nodding in agreement and sympathy with what were initially supposed to be the the big bad villains and later, far more fleshed-out but still intentional caricatures.

    One look at this picture and you know that Quark’s is a place where good times are to be had.

    1. Grumbletarian

      The Ferengi were right about everything, especially the ‘forbidding women to wear clothes’ policy.

      1. You want to see Trigglypuff naked?

        1. Grumbletarian

          Well, no, but I believe they forbade women from leaving the home, too.

      2. I always preferred the Ferenczy, myself.

    2. BakedPenguin

      The one really good moment was when Quark pointed out that their civilization never had massive wars or holocausts. Too bad the writers never thought about the reasons behind that.

      1. Somalian Road Corporation

        This exchange between Nog and Jake is also one of my favorites.

        1. UnCivilServant

          +$1million (Zimbabwe)

      2. John Titor

        Well, and the time he solved a war with economics.

    3. Nephilium

      DS9 was the best Trek; however, Babylon 5 was superior to it.

      1. Somalian Road Corporation

        When I heard about O’Hare’s mental problems after his death I was quite surprised and rewatched the series with an eye towards any tells. I didn’t find any. Boxleitner did a good job but thought that O’Hare had a certain gravitas.

        Also, RIP Jerry Doyle.

        1. Raven Nation

          Didn’t see any signs of Claudia Christian’s alcoholism.

          Also, RIP Jerry Doyle. It has been noted before the number of actors from the show who died relatively young.

        2. Francisco d’Anconia

          Doyle used to rag on O’Hare mercilessly on his radio show.

      2. Chafed

        It was. Commerce mattered. Religion, race, species, etc affected how characters interacted. The physics of space flight, at least fo humans, was amply considered and presented. Definitely my faforite scifi TV show.

    4. wdalasio

      The funny part is that they actually did happen upon a point with regard to Ferengi – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W5J_qn93Nkc

    5. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

      DS9 was only good because it was Babylon 5.

    6. Glitterstorm

      “DS9 is the best Trek”

      Is this a Libertarian thing? Are we the only group of people who prefer it?

      1. Mad Scientist

        Best Trek == tallest midget

        1. Heroic Mulatto

          YOU SHUT YOUR GODDAMN MOUTH!

        2. *narrows gaze*

      2. thrakkorzog

        It’s perfectly normal. Now if you’ll excuse, me I need to go trim my goatee.

      3. Pan Zagloba

        It’s a normal Internet thing.

        I am, of course, of the opposite opinion. It’s maybe a best SF show of the whole lot. It’s shitty Trek. When you take an existing setting and you say “yes, but every premise of your setting is wrong and now I have control I will make it obviously so,” why the shit are you writing in that setting instead of your own show?

        And, of course, B5 did a far better job than DS9 did, despite the lower budget and less consistently good cast.

        1. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

          Which I think is also because they had the original writer. Paramount had to resort to making stuff up.

    7. Zeb

      Space Jews.

  10. Gilmore

    beating them seems to make them happy

    1. Bobarian LMD

      True with almost every penis.

      1. *polite applause*

  11. Ed Wuncler

    Tony was the fucking worst. I think the reason why I hated him so much was because he reminded me of a guy who I knew along time ago. The guy would always argue in bad faith, substituted debating with ad hominems and straw men, and never ever once tried to actually learn his opponent’s views. One day I came to grips that arguing with this guy was fruitless and left him alone.

    It’s one thing to debate people who views are different from yours. It’s another to debate with people who don’t actually want to learn anything and will drag you down to their level.

    1. Somalian Road Corporation

      There are more than a few people out there who argue not to convince others, but to intentionally waste their time and antagonize. See also: Buttplug and his repeated practice of citing sources that directly debunk his own claims.

      I know there are people who say that in that case you’re arguing for the audience who don’t wish to comment themselves, and to those who want to soldier on in that aspect, I can only say: godspeed and good fucking luck.

      1. John Titor

        Buttplug’s even dumber than that when he’s coked out, he’s screamed at me for ‘defending public healthcare’ even though I never did, it’s hilarious.

      2. Ed Wuncler

        I don’t really argue politics on Facebook or with people in general anymore. When you reveal that you are a Libertarian, before you get to the actual argument, you have to argue that you’re not an asshole that takes pleasure in watching orphans die in coal mines and other ad hominems that are forced on you. That shit gets old really fast.

          1. Emmerson Biggins

            ya, I don’t wanna watch. That’s gross.

        1. R C Dean

          you have to argue that you’re not an asshole that takes pleasure in watching orphans die in coal mines

          Of course we don’t take pleasure in watching our orphans die.

          Dead orphans can’t swing a pick or polish a monocle. Why, I can remember almost shedding a tear at the last cave-in. It was a tragedy; four perfectly useful orphans decommissioned.

          1. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

            With an investment in CCTV recording you can sell the films to those who do take pleasure in watching them die and recoup a portion of the capital loss.

          2. invisible furry hand

            Thoughts and prayers are with you RCD

        2. wdalasio

          you’re not an asshole that takes pleasure in watching orphans die in coal mines

          Of course I’m not. First, as RCD points out, orphans are a valuable resource. Secondly, why would anyone have them mine coal when there’s uranium to be extracted.

    2. John Titor

      He’s still over there, blessing everyone with his insight. Today he said the only reason why the Republicans are more relaxed about gay people now is so they can justify oppressing Muslims. It must be nice living in a Saturday morning cartoon.

      1. Volren

        Tony used to at least try to pretend to be reasonable until he got pantsed intellectually and then moved on to massive goalpost shifting and ad homs (though he was a dishonest pos throughout)

        Ever since the election though, all it took was not being as pants-shitting panicked about Orange Hitler as he was to set him off in full attack mode.

        1. Raven Nation

          One commenter once suggested to me that the Tony persona was run by more than one person. Without being able to verify that either way, it makes a certain amount of sense to me.

          1. square circle

            I don’t think so – his self-righteous prissiness is pretty distinctive.

          2. DenverJ

            I don’t know about Tony, but Bo was almost definitely more than one person.

    3. Microaggressor

      That’s because Tony’s holy mission isn’t to learn, it’s to educate ye masses to the path of Wokeness.

      That he’s so bad at debating his efforts are counterproductive, is lost on him.

    4. square circle

      I have mixed feelings about Tony. He is tedious, and insulting, and childish, but he’s pretty reliable at presenting the Team Blue perspective-du-jour as grist for the mill, so to speak. Pointing out that he’s wrong provides a perpetual context for explaining libertarian ideas.

  12. Tundra

    It wasn’t me!

    Woohoo!

    (Although one of my comments disappeared under suspicious circumstances…)

    1. Banjos

      Please let us know when something like that happens. It might be an issue we need to fix.

      1. Tundra

        It was a shitty comment. The world is better off without it.

        But, yes, I will for sure. Thanks again for everything!

  13. Stinky Wizzleteats

    Good on this. The other site served as a concentration point for those who had to have been banned from every other corner of the internet and were only there because they could be as assholic as possible with no fear of the boot.

    1. Bobarian LMD

      Come now… the other site was never that bad. The problem with the other site has been the decline of the web articles into shrieking TDS.

      The magazine still appears to be solidly grounded, although that could just be the lag of printing an actual magazine.

      The magazine is KMWs; Nick is the arbiter of the website.

      1. R C Dean

        Come now… the other site was never that bad.

        It got almost unusable for stretches of time due to trolling. The Gambol Era was bad, the Mary infestation was worse.

    2. Zeb

      I dunno. I always thought the lightness of their ban hammer was one of the excellent qualities of H&R. Except for the times when it all got ruined by you-know-who and you-know-who-else, the trolls are easy to ignore if that’s what you want.

      1. Stinky Wizzleteats

        I agree and they should be slow on the draw. As a libertarian it doesn’t really thrill me either but they can at least keep out those who come only to insult and argue in bad faith.

      2. PapayaSF

        One of their minor annoying behaviors was to finally add a Flag as Spam button, and then seemingly ignore all the flagging of spam I did….

        1. Bobarian LMD

          That’s only because everyone flagged you first.

  14. Gojira

    Does anybody want to guess how many hours a day the average Indian had to work to get their food, and what they spent the rest of their time doing?

    I’ll give you a free guess.

    1. Tundra

      Dot or feather?

    2. Ed Wuncler

      I was in India at the end of last August and the beginning of September for a friend’s wedding. It’s a beautiful place but holy shit, the poverty was damn near unbearable and it was dirty. Really fucking dirty. When I got back to the states, I promised that I won’t complain so much about my life.

      1. I felt the same way about Afghanistan, and a little less so about Iraq.

        Modern plumbing, cleaning supplies, clean and available water, vacuum cleaners, etc FTW!

        1. Tundra

          I’ve logged a lot of time on the reservations around here. It’s a nasty fucking world.

        2. peachy rex

          Grocery stores… when I lived in Kenya as a little tyke, we did a lot of our day-to-day shopping at a little store around the corner run by a Lebanese chap. We used to joke that the chickens he sold were also Lebanese, and had gotten to his store on foot.

      2. Gojira

        I think you guys missed the reference. It didn’t have anything to do with the bloody Hindus.

        1. 13.2 hours – then they gamboled for a bit.

          1. Gamboling, fine. But did they do any capering?

    3. 12 hours a day, and they spent the rest of their time masturbating?

    4. square circle

      To answer a tongue-in-cheek question with inappropriate seriousness, it seems to have depending on where they lived. Natives of the SE did relatively OK, while natives of Nevada spent 100% of their waking time scrounging for food, and still barely managed to survive.

      On a side note, I’ve never considered it a coincidence that natives of the East Coast were relatively welcoming compared with, say, the Yuma.

  15. Juvenile Bluster

    Hi, my name is Tulpa. I love cops and hate all of you.

    1. Zero Sum Game

      That’s a pretty good impression of him, but he never announces himself. Still, I recognized who it was. We should play charades.

    2. Psst…FOOD TRUCK!

  16. darius404

    Can there be a list of those banned on the site so we know who’s inferior to us?

    1. Gilmore

      Mary, Tulpa, and Shreek

      1. darius404

        Were those the names they used? I was more referring to their display names rather than who people think they are.

        I’ve never trusted the claims about sockpuppets. I’m sure it happens, and I’m sure people can’t reliably tell when it’s happening. Lots of false positives. But them, I AM Nick Gillespie in disguise, so anything I say can’t be trusted anyway.

        1. darius404

          *But then again

          1. Tonio

            Dude, that avatar is teh awesome.

          2. darius404

            It’s originally from a tshirt, I believe. Can’t actually find the shirt for sale anymore though.

    2. {|}===[|}:;:;:;:;:;:;:>

      I too, wish for a wall of shame and hilarity.

  17. __Warren__

    Just because I have long, spiky, colorful hair and live under a bridge doesn’t mean I’m a troll!

    *starts polishing bellybutton gem*

    *polishes faster and faster*

    *faster still*

    Ahhhhhh, gahhh….frewwww!

  18. PapayaSF

    By the way, thanks to the admins for adjusting the comments CSS and making them more readable and more compact.

    1. Uhh… Not sure what happened there.

  19. SQWRLZ

    Serious question, when is a troll a troll?
    I know we can all recognize a (dajjal/amsoc/tony/mary) gamboling about (consistent antagonistic behavior), but when does difference of opinion or even argument result in VTOS?
    I know this is a private “house rules” place, and I’m usually in the majority opinion on topics, but changing times/topics and attitudes of mods/commenters could lead to capricious and heavy-handed actions.

    You may catbutthole me now.

    1. Rufus the Monocled

      Troll!

    2. Emmerson Biggins

      I agree it’s a hard line to judge. I’d encourage, in a totally friendly and not-really-any-of-my-damn business kind of way for the new powers that be to attempt a light hand on the banhammer.

      Still, when’s it obvious that their intent isn’t to argue in good faith, but rather to waste time and space, then fuck em.

  20. DrOtto

    Last!?

    1. leon

      I doubt it.