Category: Sexuality
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#Mewtwo
First time I can remember being assaulted and forced into a Poké Ball I was only in my first evolutionary form. I told no one and lived with the shame and guilt, thinking all along that I, a Psychic-type, was somehow responsible for the actions of a 10-year old boy from Pallet Town. I had to see this “trainer” on a daily basis for years to come. He would shout my name and expel me from the pocket dimension I was trapped in, and I would be forced outside, my blood running cold, my guts carrying the burden of what only he and I knew — that he expected me to shut my mouth and fight other “monsters” in grudge matches until one of us was beaten into unconsciousness. When I was not fighting, I was forced to breed with the other “monsters” in his stable and our offspring would eventually be taken from us to be traded with other “trainers”.
#Mewtwo
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Thicc Thursday
Some people erronously believe the booty is the end all and be all of thicc. As leeloandstitch shows us, this is not true. Thicc is a complete female somatotype that involves a specific distribution of gynoid adipose tissue and muscle leading to a certain bust to waist to hip ratio that signals fecundity, leading to activation of the amygdala via the limbic system, which in turn triggers penile erection.
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MLW’s Guide to LGBTQWERTY
By Mythical Libertarian Woman
Lesbian: ladies who want to bang and/or be romantically involved with other ladies
Gay: dudes who want to bang and/or be romantically involved with other dudes
Bi: anyone who wants to bang and/or be romantically involved with either gender
Pictured: A “Gay” AND HERE’S WHERE THINGS ALREADY START TO GET COMPLICATED
There’s a controversy raging in the LGBTABCDEFG community about whether “bi” is a sufficiently woke term anymore, due to the
Gender Is A Spectrum
– Some people use “bi” to mean “I like everyone and I don’t care about their bits”
– Some people take “bi” to LITERALLY mean “two” and they will use this in very interesting ways, such as “I am only attracted to cisgender women and demigirls, WHICH IS A REAL AND VALID GENDER (see below) and those are my two”
– Some people really only like dudes and ladies and aren’t interested in made-up genders and they’re cisnormative scum
Pan: Many who are of the first “bi” definition of “I like everyone and don’t care about their bits” have decided to abandon the term “bi” and are now using “pansexual” (or “panromantic” – we’re getting there, I swear). The pans and the bis get into angry flame wars on Tumblr for being the same thing as each other but not using each other’s preferred semantics. The pans have managed to convince the alphabet soup gods to add a P onto the acronym for them. Polyamorous people think it belongs to them. Further war ensues.
Bisexual has a pretty pink-purple-blue flag, while pansexual has an ugly pink-yellow-blue flag! (YES, EVERY SINGLE THING ON THIS LIST HAS ITS OWN COLORS AND FLAG. It’s like the Panhellenic Council of identity politics.)
Polysexual/polyromantic: This is not polyamorous. It’s actually yet another division of bisexuality. See, “bi” means “two” and “pan” means “all,” but what if you’re attracted to every gender except cis male scum? Then you are poly, which means “some but not all.”
Multisexual: One more word for the same thing. This one is the umbrella ☂️™ term for all the orientations that are attracted to more than one gender. You know, bisexuality.
Polyamorous: Wants to have more than one sexual or romantic partner. I guess this is an orientation? I don’t know if otherwise straight people who are polyamorous really want to be lumped in with the LGBTQQIAPPP2++ crowd, though.
Asexual (called “ace” for short): Does not experience sexual attraction. This is really straightforward but the ace community is determined to make it about as mind-searingly complicated as the gender crowd. I’m not even sure I can define all these terms in a linear way the way I can for all the rest of them, so just try and stick with me here.
Romantic vs. sexual attraction: Some asexuals are also aromantic*, which means they don’t want to have sex or date. This is also pretty straightforward. You know your spinster great-aunt who never had any beaux (and no female “roommates,” either) and didn’t seem to give a shit? She was probably aromantic asexual. I highly suspect St. Paul was, too, which is how he managed to be so “wtf is wrong with all you sluts, just be celibate like me” in his letters. There just didn’t use to be a word for it because in Biblical times people didn’t care about this crap.
*Also, #NotAllAros are asexual. Some people are aromantic but not asexual. So I guess they want to have sex with people but not be in relationships? They get pissy with you if you say that makes them sound like dicks. #NotARobot
Some asexual people experience romantic attraction without sexual attraction. This probably seems really weird but I think it’s actually not if you think about it? Picture how a lot of couples get when they’re older and don’t feel like banging anymore, except they’ve always been that way and neither partner cares. Their idea of a happy relationship is like snuggling on the couch and being June and Ward Cleaver or something. IMO, I don’t think asexual/non-asexual (called “allosexual” or just “allo” in the ace community) relationships can work unless the allo partner is not all that interested in sex to begin with. Or if they’re polyamorous maybe. Or I guess if the ace doesn’t mind having sex, even if they’re not into it.
>Anyway, this is how we get all the -romantic suffixes on the orientations. Biromantic, panromantic, polyromantic, yadda yadda. That’s for ace people, since they aren’t sexual but they do have romantic feelings for people. Technically straight or gay is “heteroromantic” and “homoromantic” but most people just say straight or gay.
With me so far? Because up to now the ace stuff mostly makes sense, but it’s about to get really ridiculous.
Possibly because asexuality is the trendy new identity for those who don’t want to commit to changing their genders, there are several subcategories that fall under the Asexual Umbrella ☂️™.
Demisexual: People who don’t experience sexual attraction unless they have an emotional bond with someone first. This seems to be Normal to me, but I’m told it’s Not, so it’s an identity now. (This is not the same thing as “demiboy”/”demigirl”/etc! For that, see below.)
Demiromantic: Doesn’t experience romantic attraction unless there’s an emotional bond I guess? But like…that’s just…what happens when you date someone, I think. Like, when you first meet someone you don’t immediately go HELL YEAH ONE TRUE LOVE. Even Disney movies don’t do that anymore. BUT IT’S AN IDENTITY NOW OKAY ☂️™
Gray-A/Grace: Okay this is the one that really gets me. It is:
sometimes experiences sexual attraction
but not always.
There’s not even a specific set of parameters the way there is for demisexual. It’s literally an orientation for I AM NOT HUGH HEFNER. Don’t get an erection every time you see a girl walking down the street? Congrats, you’re gray-A, you can pick up your Marginalized Identity card at your local GSA office.
Finally: THE A IN THE LGBTQIA+ ACRONYM IS FOR ASEXUAL*, NOT ALLY #GiveItBack
*”And aromantic!” scream the aros**
**”And agender!” scream the snowflakes who aren’t happy with the 47 other gender options intersectional feminism has provided themMoving on from sexual orientation to gender:
Pictured: A “Transgender” Transgender: You all know what it is. The term is generally just used for MTF (male-to-female) and FTM (female-to-male), but some of the gender non-conformists want the T in addition to some extra alphabet soup letters because they heard whoever has the most letters wins the gold medal in the oppression Olympics.
Transsexual: The term for people who have actually had gender reassignment surgery. I think this is kind of being phased out, though, and people are just using transgender regardless of surgery status.
Trans*: Someone on Tumblr started using this a while ago because the * made it inclusive of both transgender and transsexual. It was really popular for like a year and then the meme became that “trans*” was oppressive for reasons. (Supposedly whoever invented it was actually a secret Nazi spreading anti-trans propaganda or something. Or maybe a pedophile. I don’t remember.) Now if you use “trans*” you’re a shitlord, prepare to be roasted.
Nonbinary: Someone who identifies as neither male nor female. Can use a variety of pronouns, from the relatively easy to parse “singular they” to the made-up but at least somewhat well-known “xe/xir” to a whole host of invented pronouns, such as those found here.
Note that this is not a finite list! You can also make up your own brand new ones and expect everyone to use them (I know people who have!) under penalty of law. Go nuts!
Genderqueer: Nonbinary
Gender non-conforming: Nonbinary
Enby: Nonbinary
Agender: Nonbinary
Two-Spirit: Nonbinary with a Native American flair (NOT TO BE USED BY WHITE PEOPLE YOU CULTURALLY APPROPRIATIVE SCUM
)
All these things are the same but they each get their own letter on the acronym! BECAUSE THEY ARE IMPORTANT AND VALID.
Demigirl/demiboy/demiwoman/
demiman: Not the same thing as demisexual or demiromantic. It’s someone who sometimes feels like their assigned gender and sometimes doesn’t. This is sort of the gray-A of gender. Bigender: One person. Two genders. At the same time. In practice, this can get a little Me, Myself & Irene. I think “genderfluid” might also fall under this, but sometimes people use “genderfluid” to mean “nonbinary” so your guess is as good as mine.
Transracial and/or transspecies/otherkin: NOT A REAL THING, STOP THROWING THAT OUT THERE TO MAKE US LOOK BAD, WE WOULD NEVER
Intersex: Previously known as hermaphrodite. They have a medical condition, I’m not sure what they’re doing here.
+: Make sure to include the + at the end of the acronym to include any letters you might have missed! No matter how many letters you include, you will always have missed some. I’m sure I missed some on this glossary! People will still be mad at you for forgetting their letter, of course, and they will likely start a hashtag movement against you, but at least you’ll have the defense of having sort of included them with the +.
Other terms of note:
Queer: All of us
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TWOC: Trans Women of Color. The most holy of identities, trumps all other letter combinations.
AFAB: Assigned female at birth (now sometimes called “CAFAB: coercively assigned female at birth” to reiterate what shitlords parents and doctors are for indicating biological sex on birth certificates).
AMAB: Assigned male at birth; see above for CAMAB.
MOGAI: Some people are saying we should use this as a catch-all instead of adding letters to the acronym. It stands for “Marginalized Orientations, Gender Alignments and Identities” (I think). But someone on Tumblr said it was invented by a shitlord (like the “trans*” person). Then someone else said no, that’s “MOGII.” Then the #discourse devolved into a flame war.
Folx: Colloquial use of the word “folks” jumped 8000% after Obama entered office! But “ks” is such a heteronormative letter combination. “Folx” is so much more inclusive!
Queer-platonic partnership/QPP: Sometimes people who say they’re aro-ace want to date each other but don’t want to call it dating because they’d have to give up one of their letters. So they date each other anyway but call it a “queer-platonic partnership.” Aces who use this term for a m/f relationship get sternly admonished by the Rainbow Police, and then there’s an epic flame war over whether straight aces should even be allowed to sit with us.
Sometimes QPPs are called zucchinis. Make of that what you will.
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Happy Thiccsgiving!
For this year’s Thiccsgiving meal, have the thicc PAWG drumsticks of Ms. Amy Jackson with all the fixings.
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Glibertarians After Dark: My New Fetish
https://youtu.be/v1d_uV2148Q
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Lesbian parents: Do problems stem from their gender, or their politics?
A 2016 study from the Catholic University of America has come back to the forefront thanks to an article on Milo’s blog called “Having lesbian parents makes you fat” (Milo’s #1 priority). The study followed 20 sets of same-sex parents (17 of them lesbian) over a span of thirteen years, from 1995 to 2008. You can read the study for yourself here, complete with a virtue-signaling disclaimer at the beginning. The gist of it is that the study found that having same-sex parents made children “2.25 times more likely to experience depression than is the general population,” as well as more than twice as likely to be obese and more than three times as likely to experience suicidal thoughts.
In their disclaimer, one thing Hindawi notes is that the small sample size of the study may be skewing results. I would agree with that, but for perhaps a different reason than either the author of the study or the editors at Hindawi had in mind. I suspect, that with a sample size that small, the odds of political diversity in the sample are probably very slim—and I would like to suggest that that, more than the gender of the parents, may be a large part of the problem.
The most recent photo-graphical evidence of a libertarian woman in the wild As background, I am bisexual and have dated men and women roughly equally (I’m currently dating a woman, though it’s been very short-term so far, only about two months). I generally prefer dating women, and would probably prefer to marry a woman, with one small caveat: lesbians are overwhelmingly fucking lunatics politically. Conservative and non-political lesbians do exist (no libertarians, though, since I’m the only libertarian woman), but like the fabled STEVE SMITH, they’re rare and require patience to spot.
Lesbians, being both women and homosexual, fit this perfect double-whammy market for the left. It is known that if you’re one of those, your vote automatically belongs to the Democrats; so, obviously, if you’re both, you doubly belong to them. Thus, lesbian Democrats are doubly insane. The vast majority of them are screaming feminists. They’re angry often, possibly even most of the time. They’ve bought into victimhood culture and they milk it for all it’s worth.
It’s easy to see how a climate like that could affect a child. But I feel this has less to do with the fact that the child has two women for parents and more to do with the fact that rabid progressivism (and postmodernism, third-wave feminism, identity politics and all the other bullshit theories that have been infecting the left for the last two decades) creates a toxic environment. These theories have been particularly strong in the LGBT community, where they became dominant much earlier than they did for the “mainstream” left (fitting the 1995-2008 timeline of the study). And you can see how the symptoms reported in the study could stem directly from those ideologies.
Higher rates of obesity? Not surprising in “body positivity” culture.
Higher rates of depression? Remember that this study was conducted primarily during the tenure of “Literally Hitler” the First. Imagine spending your formative years listening to your moms rant daily about how BOOOOOSH (or, perhaps, the real evil mastermind, CHENEYYYYYY) was going to bring about the apocalypse.
Higher rates of suicidal thoughts? I have suicidal thoughts after spending too much time on Twitter, something I can turn off. I can only imagine the effect being steeped in that ideology 24/7—as a child—would have on my psyche. The study concluded in 2008, the year of Sarah Palin and Prop 8. Not sure if it ended before the Anointed One ascended the throne, but I could see how the preceding months of “THOSE DAMN KKKORPORATIONS ARE FUNDING CAMPAIGNS TO DESTROY OUR FAMILY” might impact someone.
The “gold standard” The issue with a study like this is that they compare overall results with those of other studies that look merely at two-parent, one-man-one-woman households, without considering differences in the parents’ political beliefs. If a significantly more politically diverse sample was taken of the “standard” families (not even specifically conservative, but just politically neutral), I suspect the results look better just because the kids grew up without being mired in negativity. I would be interested to see the results of those studies broken down into leftist families vs. non-political or conservative families. I suspect that the results for the left would look closer to the results Father Sullins got, with the non-leftists bringing up their scores thanks to averaging.
Maybe, statistically, the results would still show that one-man-one-woman households are the healthiest environments for kids. But that’s also the case compared to single parent households and blended families, and they make it work. And I believe that same-sex couples can as well. But it involves leaving politics (identity and otherwise) at the door, for the sake of your kid. After all, being a lunatic is not an intrinsic, inherent part of being a lesbian; it’s an individual choice.
I can’t help but wonder what the difference would be in a household with two moms like that, rather than a household with Big Red as Mom 1 and Trigglypuff as Mom 2. A household like that of many opposite-sex couples, where politics doesn’t matter—family does.